Broken Wings
by Ren-sama23
Summary: Kamui, after the devastating Promised Day, had already given up living. He wanted all of his pains and agonies to go away. Yuuko, the Witch of Dimensions, wanted to grant his wish and take away all of his memories. However, something unexpected happened. It's a lot like Tsubasa Chronicles but I tell you it's different!
1. Chapter 1

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**And here is some angsty beginning. I hope you enjoy it. ˆoˆ**

**P.S. Disclaimer for my every fan fiction can be found in my profile. **

****

Chapter 1

It had been roughly a year since the Promised Day, and yet a boy of seventeen still felt like he was still living and reliving the day when he stabbed his twin star through the heart with his shinken. With his amethyst eyes, he could still see Fuuma's blood on his hands and it wouldn't go away no matter how much he tried to wipe it off or wash it away. He was having delusions that Fuuma was still in front of him, bloodied and smiling. He couldn't live anymore. It was all too painful for him. Bitter tears and regret swept passed him as he kept recounting every single second of that day. The people in his surrounding didn't know what to do anymore. If he wasn't The Kamui, he thought, maybe they already gave up long ago and left him. They were only there because he _was _The Kamui. Now, he was noting. After the Promised Day, where his existence was supposed to fulfill its duty, he was now an existence neither alive nor dead. _He was no one. And no one would care whether an unimportant existence such as him was to live or die._

Such was the realization that stabbed him fiercely before that Day. He could remember it like the palm of his hand. He wished he just smashed his head open and forgot everything but the words still rung in his ears up until now. He couldn't escape its hunting presence at all, like the person who abandoned him at the most important moment.

"_Sorry, Kamui." _He could hear Subaru's words like the guy was still saying it now. _"I can't love you. I'm sorry…"_

"_Subaru, please…" Kamui begged. He couldn't bear it that Subaru was on the other side. But he still wanted them to continue being friends. He had just told the older man how he really felt and was received with such devastating rejection he knew was inevitable. Subaru loved Seishirou more than anyone. Or more particularly, Seishirou was the only person Subaru ever loved and would ever open his heart to. He would never do such a thing to anyone else, not even to The Kamui._

"_I don't value anything anymore, now that Seishirou-san is dead." Subaru uttered quietly, though his voice was visibly painted by deep anguish and longing. He longed to see Seishirou again, especially now that he understood why the man chose to be killed by his hands. Seishirou loved him too… If only fate wasn't too cruel…_

"_Please come back to us… We need you… I need you…" Kamui begged again, despite being rejected for the third time by the man he loved. He looked directly at those mismatched eyes but the latter only avoided his gaze. "I beg you, Subaru… I don't want to fight you… I can't…"_

"_I'm sorry. I can't." Subaru chose to end his words with determination just to brush Kamui's plea off his mind. "I don't love you, so I cannot protect you. I am your enemy now. Please be serious in fulfilling your destiny. Don't waver now just because of me. I'm not worthy for your affection, Kamui… Please forget about me and fight for the sake of the earth…"_

In his mind, he could still hear Fuuma's, or the Kamui of the Earth's, eerie laughter in the distance. That was how his twin star laughed when Subaru rejected him for the fourth time that day. And after that was nothing but blood and darkness he wished he could erase. He wished he could somehow become just Kamui, a high student studying in the same school as his friends Kotori and Fuuma. He wished that nothing like the Seals or the Angels ever existed. And the Promised Day was just a legend he read in some literature books or novels. _If only such was the case… _

He curled himself into a ball, not even bothering to climb up in his bed. Without any notice to the moon that was now blossoming into the dark sky, he lay there on the floor as he filled the room with gut-wrenching cries of agony. He felt so abandoned, so lost and miserable. There were many ordinary people who survived after the apocalypse but they too had their own worries to solve and own loved ones to mourn for. They had no time to listen to some kid with mind problems as his cheeks were filled with bitter tears and his lips let out broken sobs, mirroring his shattered heart. Kamui felt so broken and empty. He could feel himself withdrawing from this world more and more. It was a kind of sadistic irony that he was able to protect it only for it to destroy him instead. He wanted to die but couldn't. He neither had the power to even live, let alone die by his own hands. _If Subaru was here… No, if the Sakurazukamori was here…_

How he wished that Subaru would come back to him once again. If only to deal the final blow and end his misery once and for all… He wished someone would just pay the Sakurazukamori and tell him to kill the annoying brat who did nothing but disturb the sleeping neighbors by crying every night and day. If it was by Subaru's hands, he knew he would happily embrace death… After all, almost everyone he knew and cared about was dead. He could just as well go to where they were and be reunited with them.

Sorata was already dead. He fulfilled his destiny by dying for the sake of the woman he loved. Arashi was devastated by his death but she chose to live on for his sake. She chose to be alive for Sorata and for their now one year old son. The kid looked just like his father and Arashi loved him more than anything in the world now. She wouldn't even let a single mosquito within one meter near him. Nekoi and Shiyuu both lived, but Shiyuu was still a vegetable, and it was all Nekoi could do to take care of him. Kamui had no space for her tight schedule for now. Karen and Aoki too had left this world together. _At least they were together… _Kamui's broken sobs echoed throughout the room. It was filled with so much anguish and longing. It was too painful for someone like Arashi, Nekoi, and Shiyuu who was currently on a wheel chair, to hear.

The three of them were always outside Kamui's room, wanting to go inside and comfort him, but were afraid they would bring him more pain than help. Nekoi couldn't help but sob too just by listening to Kamui's cry. Shiyuu comforted her and he too wore a very pained expression. At times like this, Arashi wondered what Sorata would have done. It was him who always had the audacity to enter Kamui's room when the latter wanted no one. He was the one who helped kamui open up to the rest of them. It was Sorata who could probably comfort Kamui now.

"If Sorata is here…" Arashi mumbled, only to feel her chest tightening as well. She was trying really hard to live, but she didn't want to just live and leave Kamui in the past, all alone and miserable. She wanted to help him, but she, like Nekoi and Shiyuu, didn't know how.

"Subaru-san can probably… He too can probably make Kamui stop…" Nekoi said as she wiped her tears just so Shiyuu wouldn't worry more. "I wonder where he is now… why did he leave Kamui like this..?"

"Ojou-chan, I'm sure he too has to solve his own pain and agony on his own." Shiyuu answered her. "I'm sure he'll come back once he gets passed all of this…" He gave Nekoi a kiss on the forehead and a hug, from which Arashi looked away. Those two could start anew. But she was already crippled, emotionally, with Sorata's lost. And Kamui was even worse than her. At least she had a son to live for and take care of. But Kamui didn't have any of those. The only girl he ever loved was killed by her own brother, a person who was also very important to him. That same Kamui of the Dragons of Earth met his end at the hands of the Kamui of the Dragons of Heaven. And the only person he ever loved after Kotori abandoned Kamui when he needed the man the most. No wonder Kamui felt so abandoned and lost. No wonder he wouldn't even acknowledge Arashi and Nekoi's presence as something helpful. No wonder the guy withdrew more and more with every day that passed by. No wonder he couldn't let go of the past and move on. It's because no one was there to take his hand. All of the important person in his life either died or abandoned him.

Night had passed and Kamui had cried his shattered heart out. But it still wasn't enough. His tears had stopped for a while now but he knew his broken heart was still drowning from the tears that weren't able to come out of his tired amethyst eyes. He wanted nothing but to spend his eternity cooped up in his room like this, crying. But it was somehow exhausting. He wanted to just disappear off the face of the earth, just like his twin star. If he couldn't be with the person he loved, with Subaru, then he wanted to at least be with Fuuma. _He wanted to die… _He felt so empty he wanted to just hurry up and die. If an earthquake were to strike the town, he wished his room was the first to be buried underneath the earth.

Arashi and Nekoi were too exhausted from lack of sleep, just like every night these past few months. Or more specifically, after the Promised Day. Arashi immediately prepared some meals, just to take her mind off some depressing matters. Nekoi walked in the kitchen and smelled the delicious aroma of the food she was cooking.

"That smells good." Nekoi said. Arashi turned around and gave her a smile. The former was pushing Shiyuu in the wheel chair. He too smiled at the Shrine maiden.

"I thought you two are watching television?" She asked as she continued what she was doing. Nekoi merely shrugged in boredom and Shiyuu, being the good guy, cared to explain.

"There's nothing on TV than more disturbing news about murders and suicide." He shook his head in disappointment. "More and more news are about some fake diviners trying to say things like what Nostradamus said. They just give people the creeps."

Nekoi patted Inuki, her dog spirit, and continued her animated conversation with Arashi and Shiyuu.

Far from the kitchen and inside his own solitary room, Kamui was also watching the same thing as Shiyuu was watching earlier. His eyes were on the television but they were merely staring emptily into the box. He was seeing nothing but blurred vision of something that had died or something which was massacred or something about something. It was early morning and all the news were about deaths, which reached not Kamui ears. He was too depressed about his own affairs that he cared not about those other things.

His eyes flickered when a commercial about some brand of cigarette caught his empty gaze. He watched it intently, but with pained expression, before he decided the TV was better turned off.

He was about to go back to bed when a thought entered his mind.

Arashi was about to serve breakfast for three people, since her son was still fast asleep. That boy was the only one who was not bothered by the sound of Kamui's bitter sobs even though their room was beside Kamui's. She was preparing the juice when she glanced at the doorway and almost dropped the pitcher on the floor. Nekoi and Shiyuu noticed her weird action and followed her gaze. Their eyes too widened when they saw Kamui leaning on the wall. He was wearing his old smug expression, except for the fact that his eyes held no life or radiance in them. He used to be a very selfish person who only thought of himself.

"K-Kamui-san," Nekoi started. "Come eat with us!" She was the first to recover from the shock. They were already used that Kamui stayed in his room. He abandoned school ever since the promised Day because it held too many memories of Kotori and Fuuma. He didn't even go out of his room for meals. Nekoi and Arashi were the ones who brought it in his room everyday. That was already the setting for a year now. And this was definitely a huge shock for them. And they all hoped it's for the better.

Kamui approached but didn't answer. He looked at the food absentmindedly and sat on one of the chairs.

"Good morning, Shirou-kun." Shiyuu greeted enthusiastically. Kamui nodded at him but also didn't answer. They hadn't heard his voice for almost a year now, except when he screamed from his nightmares.

Arashi didn't know what to say to him so she kept her silence, but she smiled when her eyes met Kamui's dead ones. Once again, he only nodded in return. She placed a plate in front of him and put some easily digestible foods. She knew he wasn't eating much of the food they prepared so his stomach probably couldn't handle any heavy foods right now.

From behind Kamui, Arashi took the chance to look at the boy. Kamui was unusually smaller and slender for his age, and Sorata always teased the boy that he had some female hormones in him. But now, Kamui was only half his former stature. A year of doing nothing but curl himself up into a ball didn't help in making his bones grow longer. His ill-diet also did nothing good to his health. He was nothing but a pitiful shadow of the once proud Kamui of the Dragons of Heaven. The one who attacked Hinoto with much smugness and audacity and the one who once lead the Seven Seals. Kamui, now, was nothing but a shadow, reduced to something insignificant by his own choosing.

"Stare any more than that and I'll melt." Kamui voiced for the first time without turning his head, which made all of their eyes widen for the second time. Arashi was a little embarrassed because the statement was meant for her. But she's glad that Kamui's senses were still as keen as back then. He used to say the same thing to Sorata, who always looked at him from behind.

"I'm just glad you're here." Arashi said composedly. She wasn't the type to voice her sentiments, but if it would somehow comfort Kamui, then she didn't mind it at all. Kamui didn't answer, but started eating his share in silence.

Nekoi and Shiyuu also ate quite silently, both satisfied and glad that Kamui was starting to pick his shattered self up. Arashi jolted when she heard her son's crying voice. She immediately left the kitchen and went into the room where little Sora was. After a while, she went carrying him in her arms so protectively like she was afraid someone would take him away. Kamui glanced at the boy and when their eyes met, Sora clapped his hands in delight, which surprised not only Arashi but also Kamui himself.

"It seems Sora-chan likes you, Kamui-san." Nekoi said in her proudest voice. "He never had the chance to actually see you so…" She let her statement trail off before she touched Kamui's many unwanted emotions. Shiyuu noticed that and gave her hand a light squeeze.

Kamui broke their eye contact which made Sora a little grumpy. The teen immediately finished his meal and excused himself. "I'm going back to my room."

After that, no one could even say anything to stop him. All they could do was watch his leaving figure as he disappeared into the living room and into the stairs.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

He lit another cigarette as he watched the multitude some ten meters below him. He was sitting on one of the tallest trees' branches in some wooded area of some park he didn't recognize. He could see children playing in the playground and he was repressing his urge to rip their throat and drink their blood. He was the Sakurazukamori, the one who for eternity was obliged to kill people just to feed the solitary Sakura some meters away from the tree he was in. The Sakura only needed the people's body. It was his job to drink their blood to enhance his power, no matter how disgusting it tasted.

He puffed smoke in the morning air as he tried to repress his killing urge, or rather, the Sakura's urge to kill those innocent young ones. Innocent bodies tasted good. Their blood also tasted a lot better than grown-up men and women with blood on their hands and crimes to cover up. Their blood tasted so horrible it always made Subaru throw up after he finished drinking their bloods. But he couldn't do anything against it. It wasn't his choice that he was thirsting for their blood even if it tasted like hell. It was because he's the Sakurazukamori now that he was doing this. _Everything's because he loved Seishirou… _The only reason why he could continue his existence as the Sakurazukamori was because the former Sakurazukamori was the man he loved with all his heart and soul, and that same man continued to occupy his heart and his very thoughts. _He loved Seishirou so much… _He wondered how much more he would have loved the man if he didn't kill Hokuto, Subaru's older twin sister. He wondered if he would be a dragon of heaven in the first place if Seishirou was on the other side. He knew he would've followed the man, even to the ends of the earth. That's how obsessed he was with his former lover before Seishirou killed Hokuto. _And everything was turned upside down…_

He knew he needed to get away from this place if he didn't want to kill those innocent children, oblivious of the mismatched eyes, one a dull green and one a hue of gray, and claws that were constantly trying tear their throats open. His gray eye shone until it became deep crimson, showing that he was losing his hold of his sanity. _He really needed to get away from this place, and fast. _He immediately jumped from tree to tree in swift movements, making his black trench coat rustled behind him in every shift. No one from the people taking a stroll below even had the slightest idea that a fearful and cold-blooded assassin was only some six or seven meters above them.

Subaru sprinted from tree to tree in absentmindedness, until he realized his feet had taken him to the same place. That same place was where he always ended up finding himself after some mindless travel. That same place was a two storey apartment in some far-off place. He knew he travelled at least half a kilometer without thinking because this apartment and that playground were never near each other.

He sat on the tree and lit another cigarette, the latter was already gone from his fingers when he realized it. From the open window, he gazed quietly at the messy room inside. There were smear of dried blood here and there, as if the owner was too clumsy and always getting himself injured, or that owner was just too suicidal. And that same owner now entered his room silently.

Subaru was even a bit surprised to see Kamui entered from the door. He was used to see the boy curled up in his bed or on the floor. Or throwing up in the bathroom, or most to the time, crying or sobbing in agonizing bitterness and pain. He was even surprised when he felt relieved that Kamui was able to go out of his room now. The boy would surely get over it and forget everything sooner or later. Or so he hoped. He felt a little responsible for getting Kamui in this kind of depressing situation. But he was sure he did the right thing. He really didn't feel anything or whatsoever for the boy in the first place. He only saw Kamui as Kamui, the one responsible for the end of the earth, the Leader of the Dragons of Heaven. He did not see Kamui as a teenage boy whom he could share his heart with. That's just too impossible for him, especially after Seishirou's death.

And yet, his rejection made Kamui psychologically and emotionally weaker and was even brought in the brink of getting killed by the other Kamui. Except that the other Kamui's wish was to die at Kamui's hands. If only fate wasn't too cruel, then Seishirou would still be alive and Kamui would still be with Fuuma even if he was rejected by Subaru. But neither was the case, all because of destiny. Subaru gritted his cigarette harder and it was squeezed in between his lips so he had to throw it away, again. He lit his fifteenth cigarette ever since he woke up this morning, one should note that it was still early morning, and smoked.

The boy wore dark blue tattered jeans and black thin sweater with turtle neck which wouldn't even be able to protect him from the cold. But it did help in helping people see how beautifully slender the boy was and how creamy pale his skin in comparison to the black clothing he was wearing. His tousled hair also looked kind of cute as he absentmindedly tried to brush it with his beautiful, long and slender fingers. _He was becoming more and more feminine, not only physically. _Kamui, he noticed, had eyes more hollowed than before, but they were full of determination, which scared Subaru in a way he couldn't explain. _Kamui was planning to do something. _That he was sure of. His suspicion was confirmed when Kamui approached the open window and jumped outside the apartment from it, leaving his room locked from the inside.

He didn't feel anything towards Kamui. That statement was true until now. But he just couldn't shake off the feeling that Kamui was about to do something totally reckless. And Subaru felt that he somehow had to stop the boy from doing anything rash. He felt that Kamui was too delicate and thus needed some adult guidance, which he knew he could never give, nor would Kamui wanted him to give those. But he nevertheless couldn't leave the boy be.

Kamui had decided, used the breakfast earlier to use as an excuse to see his friends off, and immediately escaped from the window. He ran towards the less crowded street, oblivious of the concerned presence that started following him in silence. Kamui knew he had to do this to know what he really wanted. He needed to go to the place where it all ended, at least for most of them. That cursed tower. He could see it now. He knew that if he wanted to find the answer to his miserable questions, he would find it there. _If he wanted to live or die… _

But as he turned into a corner, he suddenly found himself into a garden of a small house. He wasn't familiar with this street so he really didn't know there was something odd. He just knew he could feel intense magical power from inside the house. He stopped looking at the tower, for now, and approached the door.

Subaru, who was following Kamui for a while, was immediately perplexed when the boy he was following vanished into thin air. _Did Kamui notice his presence and ran away? _He couldn't understand it, but somehow the thought of Kamui running away from him made his chest feel tighter than usual. There was something inside him that was against that thought, and he couldn't understand why. It's only natural for Kamui to run away from him now, after all that he did. He betrayed Kamui's trust and even broke the poor boy's heart. He didn't deserve Kamui's presence. But it wasn't like he held any special feelings towards Kamui so he couldn't understand where the prickling pain was coming from. _Perhaps it was guilt that was eating him from the inside…_

But the fact was Kamui vanished, and he didn't know where the hell the boy went and hid himself. He felt like Kamui was near but he couldn't see him. That thought made the once prickle of pain turn into a stabbing one. It hurt so much that Subaru unconsciously gripped his chest. _"Where are you, Kamui?" _He heard his heart scream even before his mind could comprehend the words. Kamui was gone, and it was all his fault…

~tbc~

****

Ren-sama's Corner:

Host: So, Ren-san, why do you want to pair up these two even though Subaru-san really likes Seishirou?

Ren-sama: (*evil grin*) It's because it's more fun that way. I can't wait for Subaru to $# %! Kamui! And then he would #%*&^ Kamui and $#&*%^ Kamui! (bwahahaha!)

Kamui: (*mumble*) I can't believe I'm hearing something so vulgar right now.

Host: So, Ren-san, what do you think of this emo pairing then? Are you satisfied with the development for now? Ren-san? Ren-san? Are you okay there?

Ren-sama: (*having nose bleed from too much wild imagination*)

Subaru: (*not far from them, up in the tree; just outside the room's balcony*) I think I know who to feed the Sakura tonight.

Ren-sama: (heard Subaru) No! Sakurazukamori-sama! I'll keep quiet about my dirty thoughts! So please don't let Sakura-san eat me! (hid behind Kamui)

Kamui: You should endure for now, Subaru. The people will get angry if the author suddenly disappears mysteriously with just a chapter of accomplishment.

Ren-sama: Yes, you tell him, Kamui!

Kamui: We'll just use Ren for now.

Ren-sama: I heard that. (and to the host) And you, who're you? I thought it's my corner? Why are you the host? I know you're handsome and all but…

Host: (*blush*) …

All: Please **R&R**! And please **NO flames**!

Ren-sama: And please SeiSu fans, don't kill me! I really, really love SubaruXKamui pairing than any other pairing in X. ˆoˆ

Kamui: Who're you talking to? We're just in your room, you know.

Ren-sama: …


	2. Chapter 2

**Ren-sama's Note: **

**Thank you, everyone for the nice and inspiring reviews! I really like you all! Here comes the next chapter! ****ˆoˆ**

**Chapter 2**

Kamui's once dead curiosity was piqued when the door opened even though there was no one on the other side. Two little girls who looked a lot like each other greeted him some two meters ahead. _Were they the ones who opened the door? _He doubted it. It even surprised him that he was dwelling over those little details.

"Welcome, the Mistress is waiting for your arrival!" The two girls, one having blue hair and one a pink, voiced in chorus.

"Ah, no." Kamui didn't enter the house and even took a step back. "I was here on accident. I was on my way to–" His statement was stopped at the sight of a pale lady in a daring kimono. Her hair was so long it already reached her ankle. From her crimson eyes, Kamui knew she held an immeasurable power that might even surpassed his own and she was also the one who opened the door.

"There are no such things as accidents or coincidence, Kamui Shirou." She voiced coolly, which somehow made Kamui forget about his personal worries, if only momentarily. "There is only the inevitable." She smiled before she gestured for him to enter. "Come in."

"What is this place?" Kamui asked in suspicion. By now he was sure there was something off about the house, and about the mistress herself. She was just too powerful to be some simple mistress of a humble home such as this.

"You're right, I'm not some simple mistress of this humble house. I go by the name of Yuuko, and this is my humble shop, where your wishes are fulfilled at the cost of an exact amount." She smiled again, reading his thoughts, which didn't come as a surprise anymore. After all, Hinoto was somehow similar to this person, in both their presence and aura. Although this Yuuko woman was somehow at least ten or twenty times more powerful than the blind princess.

Kamui entered the house and the door closed by themselves. The two girls ushered him into a room and he sat in front of Yuuko.

"You're wondering why I didn't participate in the Promised Day even though I have the power to stop it?" She said the most troubling question inside Kamui's mind. All of his depressing thoughts were momentarily forgotten in the presence of this mysterious shop owner. "It's simple. Because doing something as great as saving the world requires an also great compensation. I don't have anything that can compensate for such an act. Thus, I cannot help even if I want to." Kamui saw a guy in apron came out from one of the paper doors.

"Yuuko-san," the guy called, carrying a basin filled with water. Kamui stared at him for a while before his attention turned to the basin.

"What do you want with me?" Kamui asked directly. He knew he couldn't leave the place unless Yuuko wanted to. So he let himself sat in annoyance.

"Wrong," Yuuko voiced as she started to use her hand and stir the water in the basin. "It is you who want something with me." Kamui creased his eyebrow in protest but Yuuko continued. "Like I said, this is a shop. But not a normal one. This shop grants you your wish but it requires compensation." She stared into the water and smiled. "I see that you're wish is of a high caliber. High price is also required for this kind of wish."

"What are you saying? I don't wish for anything." Kamui knew he was lying, because right now, he really wished for something.

"I can take it away, your pain." Yuuko said as her cool gaze turned to Kamui. The latter's amethyst eyes widened at the statement. They were immediately filled with hope and fear, fear that he was being lured into a false security. "But… in return, you have to give me your power as The Kamui. In order to receive happiness, it takes an equal amount of effort. Compensation is required."

Kamui smirked. "I can do that." He never really liked being The Kamui. He wanted nothing but to be Kamui Shirou, a simple teenager, and nothing else. He didn't want his powers. No, more precisely, he hated it so much. If it would leave his body just as his wish would be fulfilled, then it's all worth it.

"Your pain, together with your painful memories will be erased." Yuuko said. Kamui simply nodded. He wanted those painful things to go away once and for all. If he could somehow forget Subaru's rejection and betrayal, Kotori and Fuuma's death, his mother's death, and everyone's death, then he didn't mind. He knew he was escaping reality, but he knew he would go insane if it continues like this.

He initially wanted to go to Tokyo Tower to decide whether he would live or die, but this bargain was far better than his initial plan.

Yuuko made the guy, Watanuki, step aside as she performed the ritual. She knelt in front of Kamui and almost immediately, two huge white and feathery wings sprouted on Kamui's back. All the others, especially the guy wearing apron, were amazed at the sight except Kamui. He didn't understand what was happening. It's like he's in a trance, watching everything from afar.

Kamui, as he glanced at Watanuki, thought that the guy's name somehow sounded like Inuki. He remembered Nekoi and then Arashi, and then the rest of the departed Seals. And Subaru… he wondered where Subaru might be right now. He just hoped that his feelings for the Sakurazukamori would be erased too. He didn't want to suffer for anybody else anymore. It was too exhausting. He wanted nothing but to just disappear…

"Watanuki!" Yuuko shouted. "Perform the sealing ritual immediately! His wish is changing!" She bit her lower lip as she felt that Kamui wanted nothing now but to completely disappear. The wind started swirling strongly, circling Kamui, and it was hard for even Yuuko to stop it. She was only about to cut off the gray feathers that were his painful memories, but at this rate, all of his memories would be erased. She actually used the term memories but it was actually a piece of his soul that Kamui wanted to be taken away. The price for erasing a part of a pained soul was too high and the risk too was high. That's why she said Kamui's wish was of a different caliber. But she hadn't expected an immediate change of heart coming from his customer. At this rate, Kamui would really disappear as he wanted. She gritted her teeth harder as she tried to prevent that with all her power. Kamui was Kamui so his power was almost equal to hers, and it was tough trying to prevent him from simply disappearing. His wings too had started to vanish and what remained of the huge wings earlier were just some little feathers on Kamui's back.

Watanuki immediately placed five totem pole-like statues circling Kamui just as the last of the feather on his back vanished into thin air. The strong gust of wind also calmed down just as Kamui fell on the floor with eyes reflecting nothing but grayish blankness.

"No!" Yuuko shouted. This wasn't supposed to happen. _He didn't even have the proper compensation for what he suddenly wished! _This was all wrong. She stared, wide-eyed, at Kamui. Even Watanuki, who was used to seeing his employer with coolness, was disturbed.

"Is he… dead..?" He asked quietly, fearing his voice would make what remained of the boy to disappear as well.

"No… but his soul was gone." Yuuko said in a monotonous voice. "At this rate, his body will die too. He doesn't have the proper compensation so his wish mustn't be granted…"

"We have to help him!" Watanuki exclaimed. He didn't know the poor soul but his kindness was enough to want to bring Kamui back.

"It's impossible." Yuuko stood up and approached Kamui's almost lifeless body. "Right now, his soul should have been scattered in different dimensions, away from his body and this place. Crossing the dimensions more than once requires the right amount of compensation…" She stopped talking and turned her attention to the door.

"Mistress, there's a visitor." A black toy-like furry animal said. He was actually sleeping al this time that the incident with Kamui happened. But the arrival of that particular visitor had immediately woken up the black animal, which piqued Watanuki's curiosity.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to entertain you earlier." Yuuko said coolly, though there was still an edge to her voice. "I had another customer, Sakurazukamori-san."

Subaru's eyes immediately widened when he saw Kamui's lifeless form lying on the floor. "What did you do to him?" He was ready to kill Yuuko when he recognized her. "The Witch of Dimensions..?"

"Yes, that's me." Yuuko simply said. "Your acquaintance made a forbidden wish here. The wish to disappear."

Subaru was shocked at what he heard. After all, earlier, Kamui looked more lively than usual… _Why would he wish for such a thing! _He immediately approached Kamui and knelt beside the teen. "Kamui..? Kamui… wake up… It's me…"

"It's no use. I too was shocked." Yuuko said. "He initially wished to forget all the pain. In short, he wished for me to erase all of his painful memories. But then his wish suddenly changed when I started the ritual. He was powerful enough to kill his own existence. We barely managed to save his body, but his soul was–"

"Enough!" Subaru shouted. "Let me leave this place together with Kamui."

"Don't you wish to help him?" Yuuko proposed. "I can–"

"You're the ones who turned him into this!" He snapped back. He knew he was being unreasonable. He knew there was no one to blame for everything than himself. He was one of the greatest reasons why Kamui was in pain. And he just couldn't accept that as a fact when his heart felt like it was about to burst.

Yuuko turned silent for a while. She watched as Subaru disappeared in front of her. It seemed his wish was also forgotten. Subaru didn't care about his personal wish for now. That's why he was able to leave the place of his own accord. _Those Dragons of Heaven were really interesting beings…_

"Aren't we going to do anything?" Watanuki asked. He really wanted to save Kamui. "At this rate, that guy will really…"

"Don't worry, they will come back to this place for sure." Yuuko said seriously. "It is inevitable."

"But that was some real accident back there." Watanuki voiced as he started cleaning the floor. "Not even you were able to foresee that, right?"

"No, Watanuki KImihiro." Yuuko said. Her earlier disturbed expression looked more amused now. "What happened back there was inevitable. Even if I was surprised by it, that too, was inevitable. It seems The Kamui has more power than I initially thought…"

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Arashi was still rattled and Nekoi did nothing but sob in Shiyuu's chest. Just a moment ago, they were disturbed by repeated desperate knocks. And to their surprise, when they opened the door, it was Subaru carrying Kamui in his arms. He immediately entered the house and put Kamui down on the couch in the living room. They were too shocked to see the Sakurazukamori that they didn't notice his quiet distress. It had been a year after all, without any news on where Subaru was or if he was still alive. Kamui had been the one who dealt the blow with much grief. It was only after a while that they noticed Kamui was not steering in his 'sleep,' which was a spectacular sight nowadays. And then it hit them. They couldn't feel any life force coming from Kamui.

"What happened to him!" Nekoi said in accusation. She knew the old Subaru wouldn't do such a thing as kill Kamui, but she didn't know if the same statement was true about the Sakurazukamori.

"His soul is not there." Arashi mumbled. "Kamui's body is still alive but his soul is nowhere… What happened, Sumeragi-san?"

"I'll explain later." Subaru answered, trying to figure out what to do. He immediately brought Kamui into this house because he knew normal doctors wouldn't be able to heal him anyway. Only people specializing in magical powers like Nekoi and Arashi could actually help. "Please make it so that his body won't die. I can't do it on my own."

Arashi immediately knelt beside Kamui without any question, but Nekoi was still wary of Subaru. She still thought Kamui's condition had something to do with Subaru. His mere presence in this house right now was proof of that.

"I need to call out his soul, wherever it was." Arashi said. But before she could even start, Subaru already stopped her.

"It's no use. I already tried that." He said, more of a whisper than his actual voice. "His soul is not in a single form right now. And it's not in this dimension."

"What do you mean by that!" Nekoi asked while her tears flowed down her cheeks. "What did you do to Kamui!"

"I said I'll explain later." His voice was calm but it was deadly, like the Sakurazukamori that he was. Shiyuu immediately pulled Nekoi away from Subaru when he sensed the latter's killing aura. Subaru himself was surprised that he immediately sighed, trying to calm himself down. "I'll just say what I know. The rest is for you to ponder about." And he told them everything, starting from when Kamui escaped through the window up until he, Subaru, carried his lifeless body into the apartment. He didn't know what really happened inside that shop so he only said the things that Yuuko told him.

"That means we somehow have to pour some life energy into his body, to at least stop it from dying." Arashi said with a voice calmer than how she really felt. She wanted so much to cry. Kamui just started eating properly earlier and now he was lifeless. Kamui was also important to her. Even though she appeared indifferent sometimes, she still cared for the boy just as Sorata did.

"I'll offer some of my life energy." Subaru said readily. He knew that something like that was needed to be done. But he didn't know how. He was an onmyouji, but he neither had any experience in life sharing nor had he seen anything like it. He was someone who always took away lives, not someone who went around saving it.

"I don't exactly know how it was done, but I'm sure it needs some kind of physical contact…" Arashi rubbed her head, to the point of scratching herself. _If only she paid more attention to the lesson that her poster parent gave her!_

"I think I know how." Nekoi chose to momentarily forget her wariness. "My grandmother did it once with a dying boy. She was able to give him life energy at least until he was sent to the hospital."

"How?" Shiyuu asked. He felt that any more minute of not doing anything and Kamui would really die.

"Some mouth-to-mouth resuscitation is required… and through that, the life energy is passed…" Nekoi said uncertainly. She doubted Subaru would really participate with that idea. But to their surprise, and silent amusement, Subaru agreed.

"I understand." He said seriously. Though he didn't know how life energy was passed form person to person, he somehow knew the theory behind it. He could just use his experience in throwing his powers to the enemies just to see if it would work. _But Kamui is not an enemy…_

He knelt beside Kamui and his gloved right hand held the back of Kamui''s head, propping him upward, and his also gloved left hand held Kamui's jaw and aligned Kamui's face to his own. Subaru wasn't sure what to do but he knew he just got to give it a try. It's not like he was stealing anything from the boy. It was nothing like that. It's merely mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. That's all there was to it, or so he kept telling his mind as he closed the distance between them. Arashi and Nekoi watched in curiosity just how Kamui would look like when kissed by Subaru, the person he loved. But of course, they were really worried about Kamui too.

And their lips touched. It was gentle. Subaru felt that Kamui's lips were really soft. But more than that, it was _cold_. It was so cold that Subaru wanted nothing but to just hug him tight, just to keep the boy warm. He could feel his tears rising up from beneath his eyes. He thought he got over his emotions a long time ago, but it seemed he was badly mistaken. Kamui's cold body against his was making him panic silently. It was hurting him beyond what he could comprehend, and he couldn't understand it because it's not as if Kamui was anyone special for him. The only two special persons in his life were Hokuto and Seishirou. And both of them were long gone. His heart too had died since then. But what was this unmistakable pain in his chest, like it was shattering once again? He held back a sob as he deepened their so-called mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

"I think he was leaning more to kissing Shirou-kun than sharing life energy–" Shiyuu's side was nudged painfully by Nekoi when he voiced all of their thoughts out loud.

Subaru used his tongue to open Kamui's slightly parted lips. He deepened his penetration even more until he reached Kamui's tongue. And as he touched it, he felt something hot stirred from within him. He felt how it flowed out of him and went in Kamui's body. He felt too hot and he knew that if Kamui was awake, he would've felt it too. _So this is the so-called life energy transfer…_

He slowly relaxed when he felt Kamui's body getting warmer. Now he wanted to cry for a different reason. Kamui was getting warmer and he could feel the life in the boy' body now, unlike earlier. He once again proved to himself that his emotions that were supposedly lost seemed to have found their way back to him again, if only temporarily. Because he knew he would have to kill his emotions again after this incident was over. And he would be away from Kamui for real. He wouldn't have to hurt the boy anymore. _Kamui would be happier without the Sakurazukamori around…_

He immediately broke the contact of their lips when he felt a different kind of need coming from his body. It's a very primal instinct, a need to bite Kamui's innocent lips and suck the blood from there. _No, not Kamui! He wouldn't let even the tree to give any more harm to the boy than he already had! _He felt that Kamui already received enough life energy so he immediately stood up, away from the boy's luscious lips which he wanted so much to suck. He was already decided to leave when Arashi called his attention. "How are you going to return his soul back?" Subaru's cold expression made Nekoi want to slap him on the face.

"Don't tell me you plan on leaving him just like this!" She asked in desperation. "Do you think merely sharing your life energy to him will save him for good! Wrong! He'll still… he'll still die if we left him like this…" Her statement was broken into sobs when she thought of Kamui leaving them too. She wouldn't be able to recover from that loss.

"We need to get his soul back." Arashi said, determination in her eyes. "You don't have to concern yourself with it, Sakurazukamori." She added seriously. "You just have to take us to the Witch of Dimensions. We're the ones who'll take it back. I beg you."

Subaru knew he couldn't refuse it no matter how hardened he might have become. He wanted to get away from Kamui as much as possible, but he knew he couldn't leave the poor boy alone. He knew the Sakura somehow had taken an interest in the Kamui of the Dragons of Heaven and he didn't have any choice but to leave Kamui's side. That was one of the reasons why he chose to be a Dragon of Earth, to avoid Kamui from getting hurt. But it seemed he could only hurt the boy no matter where he was. "I'll just take you there. Then I'll leave. I have nothing to do with Kamui now so–."

"Fine, Kamui don't need you anyway!" Nekoi said in frustration. She knew the words wouldn't have any effect on the Sakurazukamori, but she just wanted to say them anyway. She was thankful Kamui couldn't hear any of those words, because it would definitely shatter Kamui's heart again.

But afar from her accusation, Subaru was deeply hurt by those words. He knew that was the case. But the thought that Kamui had also forgotten his feeling for Subaru brought ache to the heart of the Sakurazukamori, in such a way that he couldn't comprehend where the ache was coming from. He didn't love Kamui nor did he have any special feelings towards the boy. His everything was Seishirou and he knew that wouldn't change until the day he dies.

"Alright, let's go to that place now." Shiyuu pulled Nekoi by the waist because he couldn't reach her shoulder, and gave her a small smile. "Everything will be alright. I'm sure Kamui didn't also want to disappear. He was just a little exhausted and wanted to rest a little from having a broken heart that won't heal no matter how much time passes by."

Subaru knew the same went for him too. It's been more than a year and yet he still couldn't figure out how he would live with Seishirou's memory. But for now, a more pressing and immediate problem was how to take Kamui's soul back. He didn't even realize that he just put Seishirou as second priority in that single thought.

The four of them went to the street where the shop was supposedly located. Shiyuu wanted to come along as well but Nekoi didn't want him in any danger so he was told to stay in the house. They were all able to enter the house without much effort because all of them have only a single wish.

They were back in the garden where Kamui was earlier, and they too knew that the shop was nothing like your ordinary shop. Nekoi called but no one answered.

"I came in on my own earlier." Subaru voiced. He was carrying Kamui in his arms. The boy was now warm, but he still knew Kamui was lifeless. He could feel his hands silently tremble from his disturbed thoughts.

Arashi was about to turn the doorknob when it opened on its own. They were a little surprised for a while, but that didn't stop them from entering.

"Welcome, guests." Two girls, one having blue hair and a shade of pink, greeted them in unison. "The mistress has been waiting for your arrival." The two bowed politely before they disappeared into a corner.

Arashi and Nekoi looked at each other before they silently agreed to follow. Subaru, who was behind them, also followed in their heels.

They were directed into a large garden where the Witch of Dimensions was. She was drinking from a bottle with 'sake' written on it. And her drinking partner was kind of disturbing. Subaru remembered him as the furry black animal earlier.

"Welcome, guests." Yuuko voiced as she smiled knowingly at them.

"Mokona also greets you, guests." The black thing said. Arashi and Nekoi were a bit disturbed by the talking animal, but their worry for Kamui won over them.

Nekoi was about to start talking but Yuuko raised her hand to stop her. "I know why you're here." And she pointed at Kamui. "To retrieve The Kamui's soul back from the other dimensions. But I'm telling you, I can only transport I single soul with Kamui into other dimensions."

"But–!" Arashi was about to voice her rejection but Yuuko stopped her as well.

"Transferring all of you requires an extremely high compensation. One of which you can never give me. That's why I have to transport only one of you, even though all of you need to pay the compensation for your wish."

"What do we need to give?" Subaru asked. He looked at Kamui and knew he would give anything just to get the boy's soul back. It was his fault that this happened after all.

"First, all of you need to give me your power to create kekkais." Yuuko started. "And the person who can't create a kekkai anymore needs to give me the tree."

~tbc~

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: I didn't know the new Sakurazukamori is nothing but a perverted sexually frustrated man.

Subaru: (still far from them) Hey, I'll eat you next if you don't stop.

Ren-sama: (still having nose bleed) I want more…

Kamui: (smirked with smugness) I can't believe Subaru has such deep affection for me even back then.

Subaru: Don't daydream. That was merely some miscalculated emotions leaking from a supposed dead heart.

Ren-sama: You really are too stubborn, even outside "Broken Wings". (mumble) Even though all you do every day and night is daydream about Kamui…

Subaru: (mismatched eyes flashed in a deadly way) .That. I told you I don't have any special feelings for him.

Ren-sama: Ah. Kamui has retreated into the corner. Is that depressing black smoke coming out of him?

Host: Uhmm, are you people still up for the interview or do I have to keep my silence for now?

All: …

All: Again, Thank you for the reviews, everyone! Please continue to support us! ˆoˆ


	3. Chapter 3

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Oh, I forgot to tell you sooner. The title was from Tomoko Tane's song "Broken Wings," the ending theme of _Trinity Blood_. So, here's the third chapter... ˆoˆ**

**.**

**Chapter 3**

Arashi and Nekoi were surprised at the extent of the price that they had to give up, but the two of them were desperate enough to save Kamui that they didn't mind not being able to perform a kekkai anymore. _The Promised Day had ended anyway… _Subaru looked at Yuuko for a while, unable to comprehend what she meant, until it dawned to him. _She wanted to take away his power as the Sakurazukamori. _That's the only connection he had with Seishirou now even if he didn't like the tree. He could give it up and save Kamui's life, or he could just give up Kamui and continue to live in isolation. The latter would kill him because of guilt, and the former would also kill him because his only connection with Seishirou would be taken away from him.

He closed his eyes and thought about it for a long time. He reached his conclusion when Kamui's cheek slightly brushed his neck. _It's so cold… _He bit his lower lip hard. Kamui would die any minute and yet here he was hesitating like a fool and clinging to his past like a leech. _He really was the worst… _He opened and his eyes again and Yuuko smiled at him and nodded, understanding that he couldn't voice his assent.

"What more compensation is required if we want to go with Kamui?" Nekoi asked, just in curiosity.

Yuuko thought about this for a while before she answered. "Arashi Kishuu will have to give me her son in return. And Yuzuriha Nekoi will have to give me his lover. Both of those people are the most important for you. They're the compensation."

The shock that followed made both Arashi and Nekoi unable to speak. They stared at the witch, rooted in their positions.

"What do I need to give if I want to go with Kamui into other dimensions?" Subaru asked. He didn't have anything he loved anymore so he wasn't really sure what the witch would require.

Yuuko looked at him directly before she spoke. "That right eye of yours."

He almost dropped Kamui from the shock. Subaru didn't think the witch would want his gray-hued eye of all things. He loved that eye so much because it reminded him of Seishirou. _Why did she have to get that as compensation of all things?_

"I… I can't…" He mumbled while shaking his head. The tree he could probably live without, but his eye was another thing.

"If you can't give me that eye as compensation, Kamui will have to travel on his own." Yuuko said seriously. "Which is something similar to just leaving him to die or killing him."

Nekoi and Arashi both lost their ability to speak. They wanted Kamui to live, but for that they had to sacrifice their loved ones? They knew Kamui would just wallow in self-guilt if he learned about that. Then the attempt to save him would have been in vain. Their only hope was Subaru, who looked more shocked than the two of them. Nekoi wanted to scorn him, to just tell him to give up an eye for Kamui's sake. But she couldn't find her voice to say anything, not when Subaru looked like he too would die if that was taken away from him.

"If you can't decide which is more important," the black Mokona voiced. "Then you just have to decide which you can live without."

Subaru looked at the thing with his mismatched eyes full of misery. He would really die if the tree was taken together with his eye, but he would also die if he abandoned Kamui a second time. He wouldn't live.

"Then the question is," Yuuko said as she started to smoke from her pipe. "Would you live if The Kamui dies?" And that question settled everything.

Subaru knew he'd die if Kamui dies. It meant that he'd die either way, so why not just let Kamui live even if he had to die? At least, he'd be able to be with Seishirou, in the depths of hell… He wouldn't be able to see innocent Kamui's face anymore nor would he be able to touch the boy's warm cheeks. But that too was such trivial matters if Kamui would just live. Kamui had already experienced all kinds of hell even though he was just a teenager. Subaru wanted him to at least be able to find happiness before he goes to the next world. He wanted Kamui to at least be happy, to at least smile… Now that he thought about it, he had never really seen Kamui smiled for real. Most of the time, Kamui would just let out a smile simply because everyone was too worried about his condition. He realized he might never have the chance to see Kamui smiling true to his heart anymore… _But him not seeing Kamui's smile wasn't so bad if the boy would just smile from his heart… It doesn't matter if Subaru wouldn't be able to see it… As long as it happens… Then he'll be happy for Kamui… If only Kamui would live…_

Slowly, Subaru looked up, not realizing he was looking at the ground the whole time. He looked at Yuuko directly and nodded.

"I agree." He asked. His answer was as direct as his gaze even if his voice was quivering a little. Yuuko smiled in self-satisfaction as she began to smoke her pipe in rapid succession.

"Yup, that's the correct answer." Mokona said as he drank the bottle of sake with all his might. Yuuko stood up from her relaxed sitting position and waved her hand. Arashi and Nekoi felt that something hot from within them was being forcefully driven out. They instinctively wanted to fight back but knew they couldn't, so they just let the witch do as she pleased. _As long as it would help in Kamui's rescue…_

Subaru saw that the mark of an inverted star on his right hand vanished just as his right eye did. All that was left was not a black hole in his right orb but a crimson eye that looked more like a beast's.

"It seemed you have misunderstood." Yuuko said to him. "All I want is the tree and the eye. I didn't say I want your power as the Sakurazukamori or that I want to leave you with a hole for an eye. Only your connection with the tree was cut."

Subaru didn't understand much, but he was somehow glad he could finally see with his right eye again despite himself.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Arashi asked after a while. Nekoi also nodded.

"There are two other guests who wished to travel in different dimensions." Yuuko said. "We'll wait for their arrival and they will be The Kamui and the Sakurazukamori's companion in travelling."

"What?" Arashi, who was normally quiet, exclaimed almost on top her voice. "What if by then–!" But she wasn't able to continue what she was about to say when the ground beside Subaru and Kamui started to shine brightly.

"It seems you don't have to wait anymore." Yuuko mused. Subaru immediately stepped back from the light, shielding Kamui in his arms while in a defensive position. "Don't worry, they're harmless. I think." She added when she noticed that even Arashi and Nekoi were in a defensive stance.

After some seconds, the light started to waver and two tall figures stood at least two meters apart from each other. Subaru's first reaction was shock, deep and utter shock that could at least steal a decade off his life span. Arashi and Nekoi were too shock beyond words that they totally forgot they were gaping at the newly arrived people.

One of the newly arrived had a ruffled blonde hair wearing a long cape. Nokoru Imonoyama. But the other one was wearing a black hakama with deadly metal-like armor covering his torso and his shoulders. His jet-black hair, those lose fringes, those deadly amber eyes, that built and that height… He was unmistakably, unmistakably… Fuuma.

"The other Kamui..?" Nekoi was able to voice out loud. "But… Kamui…" She looked at Kamui just as Arashi did. Subaru retained his deadly glare at Fuuma. "Kamui… supposed to have killed him…"

"Hunh?" Fuuma asked in deep annoyance when he saw that almost everyone was gawking or glaring at him.

"Relax, Dragon of Seals." Yuuko smoked again, obviously too relaxed back in her seat. They all looked at her and she explained. "They may look like people you know here but please be informed that each of these two, Fuuma Monou and Nokoru Imonoyama, came from their own dimension. This Fuuma Monou is not the other Kamui. And that Nokoro Imonoyama which you know is not this young lad in front of us."

"Good noon, Witch of Dimensions." Nokoru slightly bowed as he greeted Yuuko without any regard on the stares that he constantly received. Yuuko nodded to him in response. "I came here because I have a deep wish."

"So you're the Witch of Dimensions." Fuuma said in a gruffly mannered, so unlike how the Seals knew him. "Can you take me back to my own dimension now?"

Yuuko closed her eyes before she smiled. "You four wish to travel to other dimensions because of different reasons. But travelling into a dimension is not as simple as it looks like. Even I, the Witch of Dimensions, cannot guarantee which dimension was _your _dimension and which is your enemies'."

"Then you're basically useless." Fuuma smirked in smugness. "Now what'll I do?"

"Please listen first, you two." Yuuko addressed Fuuma and Nokoru. She first turned to Nokoru. "You who wish to travel in different dimension in search for _that _may travel together with the Sakurazukamori and the Kamui's companion to find what you're looking for." Then she turned to Fuuma. "You who wished to be back to your dimension may also go along with them. There might be a chance to find your own world by traveling with them." And now she looked at the two of them. "You can simply refuse if you don't want to. But if you are to agree, I will have to receive compensation from both of you."

"What?" Fuuma snorted in annoyance. "You just said it's almost a fifty-fifty chance that I'll be able to get back and now you want to charge us?"

"I agree with the condition." Nokoru said in determination. "I'll give anything you want."

Subaru noticed that he somehow sounded a little too desperate. He looked at Fuuma. He knew that the guy wasn't the one who just made Kamui experience hell, but he couldn't help but feel rage just by seeing that familiar face. He also became a Dragon of Earth, but he was not pleased with the Kamui of the Dragons of Earth at any rate.

"What do you want?" Fuuma snapped at him when the guy noticed that Subaru had been glaring at him for a while now. "The bitch just said I'm not some idiot whom you knew, right?" He was about to say something more when his eyes darted towards Kamui's sleeping form in Subaru's arms. "Prince!" He immediately sprinted towards Subaru, and in the latter's surprise, he immediately leaped backward.

"I want to have that cape of yours." Yuuko said, not even bothering with the erupting quarrel between Fuuma and the Seals.

"Give me back my prince!" Fuuma snarled at the three Seals, who immediately hid Kamui in protection. "You, lowly scums, have no right to touch him!"

"Kamui isn't your prince!" Nekoi voiced in a failed attempt to explain.

"Then I'll give it to you." Nokoru answered, also not bothering with the fight. "If losing this important item will help me grant my wish, then–"

"You know your wish won't be granted even if you travel through different dimensions." Yuuko cut him off.

"Please don't discourage your customers, Yuuko-san." Nokoru said as his hopeful eyes turned almost lifeless even though he was smiling.

Yuuko sighed. The boy knew his wish was something that couldn't be granted no matter what dimension he travelled to. "Everyone," she called. The others all stopped arguing and looked at her. "There are people in different dimensions who may look like the people you know in the dimension where you belong, but can have a total opposite heart or personality. They are different people who just happened to share the same physical features as the people you know. Don't forget that, or you'll find yourselves in a very big trouble."

"You mean this prince is not my prince?" Fuuma shot a disappointed glance at Kamui, who was still lifeless in Subaru's arms albeit warm.

"I keep telling you he's not a prince!" Nekoi exclaimed in annoyance for the nth time now. "He's our Kamui! He's Kamui! The one who has the power equal to the power of the Gods!"

"Well, Kamui can also be considered as a prince…" Arashi mumbled.

"Tch." Fuuma looked away, eyes filled with deep anguish hiding under his loose fringes. "And I wasted all my energy for nothing…"

"Different dimensions are filled with different types of people, different languages, different sights and situations that could shock you, and different lifestyles than the ones you know of." Yuuko said and they all looked at her again. "There are dimensions filled with nothing but war, diseases, and deaths. There are those that hold nothing but emptiness and darkness."

"Then are you going to say next that we can just kill ourselves off?" Fuuma asked incredulously.

"I'm saying you haven't agreed yet." Yuuko said. "If you wish to travel with The Kamui, and I know you do, then I want to have that ring on your finger."

Fuuma's eyes widened when the compensation was named. Subaru knew those eyes. They were filled with so much horror and anguish, just like his eyes earlier when the eye was mentioned. Arashi and Nekoi couldn't help but think that the guy named Nokoru had the easiest compensation by far, without realizing that the cape Nokoru just gave up was also as important to him as his dear life.

Fuuma gritted his teeth when he answered. "I…" He glanced at Kamui longingly, to Subaru's unexplainable annoyance, before he closed his eyes again. "It's here…" He took his ring off and gave it to Yuuko.

"Well then, to at least make sure that you won't end up in some totally chaotic world, I'll send White Mokona to serve as your guide. He can also help in looking for the pieces of Kamui Shirou's soul." Yuuko said. A White Mokona leaped from the room behind her and into Nokoru's shoulders. Subaru stood more straightly and let Kamui's head rest on his chest.

"I'm Mokona!" The white furry animal said with slits for an eye. "Are we ready yet?"

"I'm ready." Nokoru said seriously. Fuuma merely snorted his assent. Subaru took a quick glance at Arashi and Nekoi's direction before he too nodded in silence.

"Let's get going!" Mokona uttered happily just as a pure white wings as large as Kamui's appeared on the animal's back and light shone upon them all. The light was too blinding that everything they could see was pure light. The light started to vanish completely just as the four men did.

Arashi and Nekoi ended up being in an empty space where the shop was supposed to be located. The two looked at each other and agreed that they both didn't know what just happened.

"I don't care about the Sakurazukamori anymore… but I just hope Kamui will be alright." Nekoi mumbled worriedly. Arashi patted her head before she ushered the younger female back to their apartment where Shiyuu was waiting.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: (mumbling to himself) I'm beginning to think that the other Seals really treat me as a friend, especially Yuzuriha-san. And does the author want me to have some form of new relationship with this new Fuuma? I hope our relationship would be a good one… I'm looking forward to seeing Fuuma again…

Subaru: (still up in the tree) (*murderous glare towards Ren-sama*)

Ren-sama: Why do I feel that Subaru's mood just gotten dark?

Host: Um, excuse me? Are you ready to answer my questions yet?

Ren-sama: … … … … … Who are you again? And why are you always in my room whenever there's a Ren-sama's Corner?

Kamui: (*mumble, mumble*)

Host: I'm the Host. And Ren-san is the author so there must be some kind of… And I'm always here… Hey, are you listening to me!

Kamui: (*mumble, mumble*)

Ren-sama: Taihen! Subaru's mood has gotten a little too out of control because Kamui has been thinking of the newly arrived Fuuma and mumbling things about him ever since earlier! The sakura petals are everywhere in the room! Make sure you escape too, Host-san!

Host: No, wait! Don't leave me! (Ren-sama ran out of the room, leaving Host-san.) Wait for me! (also ran out of the room)

Kamui: (oblivious of the sakura; talking to himself) I wonder if there's ever a chance that that Fuuma and I can… (*blush*) After all, Subaru doesn't like me anyway, so maybe with that new Fuuma, I can form a new relationship…

Subaru: (*murderous intent reaching its peak*) Sakura-san, I think we'll have to assassinate some people from other dimension tonight.

Sakura: (reacting with malicious intent mirroring Subaru's)

Ren-sama: (in the living room with the Host) R&R, everyone!


	4. Chapter 4

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Haha, sorry to disappoint you but Fuuma's ring is not an engagement ring. I still can't say what it is but I can give you a hint. Your guess is quite close. ˆoˆ**

**Well, here's the next chapter!**

**.**

**Chapter 4**

They were swallowed by the blinding light, and before Subaru knew what was happening, they were already out of it and the place that he was now standing was far different from where he was earlier. The shop was nowhere to be found and Arashi and Nekoi too was nowhere in sight. All that he could see, aside from Kamui still sleeping in his arms, and aside from the two male companions he now had, was a colorful market-like place filled with people wearing strange clothing.

"Where are we?" Nokoru was the one who voiced their question.

"We're in a different dimension!" Mokona said in his excited high pitched voice. He was on Nokoru's shoulder again.

"You mean this place is a different dimension?" Fuuma said like it was the first time he traveled through dimensions. He looked uncomrfortable seeing too many people and Subaru knew his face must be mirroring Fuuma's.

But the onmyouji didn't care much about that. As long as Kamui didn't get hurt by their travel, then he's fine with it. "Is there a part of Kamui's soul here?" He quietly asked the furry animal.

Mokona thought deeply for a while, trying to feel if there was any presence of anything powerful. Then he looked at Subaru and shook his head. "Nope, Mokona can't feel anything right now."

"So, for now, shall we ask the people where this place is?" Nokoru asked the two of them. Before his companions could say otherwise, he was already talking to different people with much ease even though he wore something totally strange in their eyes.

They asked some of the people in the crowded place, thankful that the language was the same, and learned that the place was called Clow Kingdom.

"Oh, now that I think about it, we never really had the time to introduce ourselves to one another, right? I'm Nokoru Imonoyama, the Leader of the Imonoyama Corporation." Nokoru said as he offered a handshake. Unfortunately, no one shook his offered hand because Subaru was carrying Kamui, which made his hands occupied, and Fuuma didn't seem to know what the gesture was all about. In the end, Nokoru just let his hand fall on his side.

"For now, shouldn't we try to look for a place to stay?" Subaru said with his cool and detached voice. His two companions looked at him before they agreed. They went to the nearest shop-looking house and asked if they could at least stay for the night. The shop was full of people, and they got everyone's attention the moment they entered the place. Subaru didn't care because the people didn't seem to have any evil intent in their auras, just pure curiosity. Nokoru, who was used to being stared at by a lot of people due to his position, didn't care either. Fuuma was the one who's annoyed to a great extent. He glared at each and every one of them until they chose to avert their eyes.

"So you're looking for a place to stay, huh?" A guy with silver hair and kind silver eyes said over the counter. "Do we have any vacancy, Touya?"

"Oy, Yuki! Don't go around chatting with the customers!" A guy with dark brunette hair and snobby chocolate eyes appeared behind the door. "Ask if they want to buy something, if they don't, then make them leave!" He then disappeared again to take the other customers' orders.

"Ah, sorry about that." The guy named Yuki said with an apologetic smile. "My husband tend to get too strict when there are a lot of customers. Some customers don't order anything and just idly loiter here, that's why…"

"Husband?" Subaru voiced, a bit surprised, though it seemed he was the only one who actually cared that Yuki was a guy and yet he had a formal husband. Nokoru and Fuuma both looked at him like he was crazy and Subaru chose to just stay quiet after that.

Yuki merely chuckled at the question. "We have a spare room, but won't you get too inconvenienced by the noise?" He asked worriedly, looking at Kamui's sleeping form.

"It's alright. I'm used to noises." Nokoru said with confidence.

"Me too." Fuuma said, though he threw a worried glance at Kamui's direction which didn't escape Subaru's mismatched eyes. He creased his eyebrows, feeling the complexity of his emotion. He felt annoyed and yet he didn't know why. If Fuuma was worried, then shouldn't he be happy about it? _And yet it annoyed him to no end._

After that, Yuki guided them in the supposed spare room, which was just a little tidier than Kamui's room in the present.

"_He meant 'storage room' and not spared room, right?" _Subaru asked to himself as he scanned the boxes piled up to the ceiling and the dusts covering the floor. There was a single window which was so low people from outside could see down to their knees if they ever look out from it. Subaru thought it was meant for when the person looking outside was in a sitting position. And the outside was too noisy so they let the window remain closed.

"Woah, it's too dusty!" Mokona voiced, making Yuki stared at him in surprise. "I mean, do you expect me, The Mokona, to sleep here? Let alone make The Kamui sleep here…"

"Ah, s-sorry." Yuki scratched his head apologetically. "There's really no vacancy right now so…"

"It's alright." Subaru said. "Kamui's room is far worse than this."

"Oh." Mokona mumbled. "Then let's clean up, shall we?"

"Why, you dare order me around, you white ball!" Fuuma asked as he grabbed Mokona's head and glared at him.

"There's no use arguing. Let's just clean this place up." Nokoru said as he started putting things in their supposed proper place, which one would immediately notice that he was not used to doing. He made the room in whole lot of mess than earlier.

"Ah, I can arrange for a cleaner." Yuki proposed. "Since it looks too shabby for a room, I'll free you of any charge."

"You mean you were thinking of charging us?" Fuuma exclaimed. "You're worse than that witch!" Nokoru sighed and Subaru couldn't help but sigh as well. Yuki apologized again.

"No, it is us who should apologize." Nokoru talked in a more civilized manner than Fuuma, and Subaru was thankful he and Kamui at least had one civilized companion. "And also thank you for letting us stay."

Yuki smiled at him and left the room. After a while, two female cleaners came and cleaned the place up. They tried their best to look cute while cleaning, but it seemed the men in the room were either indifferent or numb. Subaru had retreated in a corner, sitting on the floor beside the window and looking outside. Kamui was half sitting on Subaru's lap and half leaning on the latter's chest. His head was resting on Subaru's shoulder and his knees were partly bended. Subaru had one hand wrapped around Kamui, supporting his entire body, and one hand resting on the window's railing.

Fuuma had lay on the floor on his back and ignored the presence the two women cleaning entirely. Nokoru bowed to them once but was already in deep thought after that while petting Mokona who was on his lap the entire time. All in all, no one among them realized the two women's attempt to play cute, and had to exit the room while muttering something about being gay, asleep, indifferent, and out of his mind. Not even Mokona gave the two so much as a glance.

After a while, Nokoru steered a conversation again. Mokona was already asleep on his lap. "So, like I said before, I'm Nokoru Imonoyama of the Imonoyama Corporation. You two, according from what Yuuko-san called you earlier, are Subaru Sumeragi and Fuuma Monou, right?"

However, instead of being answered, Subaru merely nodded without looking at him and Fuuma asked a question in return. "Imonoyama Corporation?" Fuuma asked in disbelief. "What the hell is that? Is that some sort of Dynasty, like the Ashura Dynasty or the Yasha Dynasty?"

"Huh?" Now it's Nokoru's turn to ask. "What's a dynasty? From where I came from, every place is ruled by different companies, and they are the ones who control everything. Capitalism is everything. I'm not bragging, but the company I lead, the Imonoyama Corporation which I inherited from my father, was the most powerful and influential company in the whole world, or at least in that whole dimension."

"So you're like a king? Or a prince?" Fuuma asked, more incredulous than before. "How absurd. You cannot be compared to a real prince at all."

Nokoru turned to Subaru, purposefully ignoring Fuuma's bad mouth. "So, the guy sleeping the whole time is Kamui Shirou-san, right? Can you tell us how his soul shattered into pieces and got into different dimensions?"

With that, Fuuma stopped and looked at the sleeping guy in Subaru's arms. Subaru looked at Kamui and brushed the tousled hair on his face with gentle gloved hands. He was hesitant to touch Kamui first because he knew how his bloodied and tainted hands would also taint the innocent Kamui. But then his longing was getting worse and he couldn't help but touch even just the boy's hair.

"He wished to disappear…" Subaru said in a very quiet voice that showed he was speaking more to himself than to them. "He badly wished to disappear… that he messed the ritual himself… It's all… my fault…"

"You didn't need to really tell us if you don't want to." Nokoru couldn't help but say. Subaru's voice just sounded so anguished and sorrowful that he didn't want to listen anymore.

"And you, why do you wish to go to different dimensions? Even leaving your own dimension…" Fuuma changed the topic and looked at Nokoru with skeptical eyes.

Nokoru chuckled but Subaru and Fuuma saw how his eyes hardened like stone. "It's nothing, just a really selfish reason."

"The witch said your wish will not be realized even if you travel with us." They all looked at Mokona who seemed to have woken up from their conversation. "Can we know what your wish is? Or is it too painful to be asked?" For once, Mokona's voice sounded really concerned, if it weren't for the obvious curiosity in his slit eyes.

Nokoru chuckled again. "The pain has passed, but the longing did not." He said with a pained voice, which caused Subaru to look at him as well. "I wish to go to a dimension where my lover still lives."

With this, all of them turned silent. Not that they were in anyway loud. Nokoru chuckled again, which sounded more like a sob than an actual laughter. "What's this? Are you going to tell me that my wish will not be realized too?"

"There's a loophole in your explanation." Fuuma finally said. "I don't really care about the wish of others as long as my wish can be realized. But I know there's something off with your explanation about your wish."

"Heh?" Nokoru said in an amused voice. "And what's that 'something off' supposed to be?"

"It feels like you're trying to squeeze your way out even though you know there's no exit sign." Mokona said triumphantly, having said some eloquent words.

"It feels like you don't really want us to find out about your real wish." Fuuma said. "But like I said, I don't really care so I won't ask anymore."

"You mean I'm lying?" Nokoru asked him with a smile, not letting the topic about his wish slide.

"You're not." They all looked at Subaru, who had his gaze locked on Nokoru. "You're just not telling us the whole truth."

"Of course." Nokoru said. "You didn't tell us the whole truth of what happened to that guy too." His eyes turned to Kamui, and Subaru couldn't counter to that.

Then Nokoru turned to Fuuma. "So, why do you want to return back to your dimension? No, wait. That question is wrong. Of course normal people would basically want to come back to the dimension they came from." He laughed like he was saying something funny. But then his eyes turned really sharp. "The question is, 'why are you in a different dimension in the first place', right?"

Fuuma looked away from Nokoru before his eyes settled once again on Kamui. "It's my prince…" And then he looked at Nokoru sharply too. "That's all you need to know, weird leader."

"Ehh?" Mokona looked really disappointed. "But that doesn't tell us anything at all!"

"Shut up, dumb animal." He glared at Mokona but the latter didn't seem too terrified by his murderous gaze.

"Is Kamui-san still alright?" Nokoru changed the topic again.

"Yes, for now." Subaru answered quietly without looking at the blonde. "I put some life energy into him earlier." He was absentmindedly playing with a strand of Kamui's hair.

Now that Subaru had calmed down a bit, he realized he was aching for at least a stick of cigarette. His mouth felt so dry and his lips were aching to feel the stick which helped him relieve some of his stress, from work and from his personal affairs. And now that he thought about it, he only had a pack inside his coat. The rest was in his apartment, back in the dimension where they left. He knew he would suffer from lack of nicotine, but he couldn't just tell Mokona to go back to where they left because he left his packs of cigarette. He would look really crazy in those two's eyes, on top of being pathetic.

He stroke Kamui's hair again, and again, and flicked the loose strands that covered the boy's face. He was doing it absentmindedly but his two companions already noticed it.

"So, is Kamui-san your lover?" Nokoru asked, curiosity getting the best of him.

Subaru stopped in the middle of stroking Kamui's hair and looked at Nokoru with a stunned expression on his face. "N-No. We are… No, we were… just comrades…"

Fuuma creased his eyebrows. "You mean you're not comrades anymore. Then why are you helping him even though it has nothing to do with you?"

Subaru was a bit surprised at the sudden question. He hadn't thought about that. He really had nothing to do with Kamui now, especially now that he's neither a Dragon of heaven or Earth anymore. He was now simply the Sakurazukamori. _He's nothing but the Sakurazukamori, nothing more and nothing less. _But why was he so concerned about Kamui's welfare? Of course he knew the answer to that, it's because of _guilt_.

"It's guilt." He answered after a while. "I feel responsible for what happened to him. That's all."

"Isn't it right to say that it's because you care for him?" Nokoru asked again. He was received with a cold gaze from Subaru, one which he didn't imagine could be so cold it would make him shiver.

"I never care for anyone. I'm the Sakurazukamori." He voiced icily. "I don't care about Kamui anymore. It's pure guilt." He looked outside and started stroking Kamui's hair again.

"_But that gesture you keep on doing look to us like you're his lover… if not his mother." _Nokoru couldn't help but think. Fuuma's expression also said the same thing.

After some minutes, Yuki came back together with the guy named Touya.

"If you want to stay here for free, at least order something." Touya said with his snobby attitude. Yuki looked really apologetic.

"I don't think we have any of this dimension's currency." Nokoru told the couple.

"What?" Touya asked.

"We meant we came from a different dimension than this one so we don't have any money. Got that?" Fuuma said in his usual annoyed look.

"Why you–!" Touya was stopped by Yuki when the man was about to start a fight with Fuuma. Subaru merely looked at them in nonchalance and Nokoru didn't even bother telling Fuuma to stop lashing out every time someone would talk to them. It's no use anyway.

"AH!" They all turned their attention when Mokona suddenly shouted. "I can feel a piece of The Kamui's soul nearby!" His eyes were wide open, revealing two cat-like slits in between bright blue oval orbs.

This immediately alerted Subaru and the others, which made the order of food kind of impossible at the current circumstance. Subaru was about to gently lay Kamui on the floor when Yuki stopped him.

"I have a mat in the other room. I'll go get it." Yuki said before he ran outside the room.

"What do you mean piece of The Kamui's soul?" Touya looked them suspiciously, trying to weigh whether they were merely lying and trying to get their asses out of the situation or if they were telling the truth. Somehow something told him they were really telling the truth.

"Finding a piece of that guy's soul has nothing to do with me so I'll stay here." Fuuma said just before Yuki came back with a mat. The really tensed atmosphere that met him when he opened the door was so intense he immediately stopped on his tracks.

Subaru's utterly cold gaze turned to Yuki when he came in, which made the latter shivered involuntarily. Nokoru walked towards Yuki and took the mat from his hands before he uttered some gratitude with a smile.

"Subaru-san, we have to hurry." Nokoru said as he saw that Subaru looked like he was sizing up a prey as he looked at Fuuma. It seemed the guy didn't want Fuuma and Kamui alone in the room.

Subaru looked at Nokoru then, who had just finished placing the mat on the floor, and gently put Kamui down. He took his trench coat off and placed it over Kamui, serving as his blanket. It covered up to Kamui's chest because of their height difference.

"Let's go, let's go!" Mokona said hurriedly as he hopped up and down in urgency. "The soul might get away!"

Subaru looked at Fuuma coldly. "If even a slight position of my coat changes, I'll kill you."

Touya and Yuki both looked surprised, just as Nokoru and Fuuma were. Subaru looked and sounded so cold that they knew he was not joking at all. He would really do it. He gave Kamui one last glance before he and Nokoru left the room together with Mokona.

"What? He thought I would just go and kill this brat? Or worse, rape this little lover of his?" Fuuma muttered, but still enough for Touya and Yuki to hear. "Damn annoying psychopath."

"Does that mean you four are not really what we can call 'friends'?" Yuki asked, a little curious. Touya too was curious but he wasn't the type to actually ask questions, except 'what's your order'.

"Friends?" Fuuma snorted. "We hardly even know each other's name! We just met like half an hour ago!" He shook his head as he sat comfortably on the floor. Even Touya was surprised that four individuals who barely knew each other were staying together in the same room.

"Is it true that Kamui-kun doesn't have his soul right now? And that you're searching for it?" Yuki asked again as he glanced at the sleeping form of the boy. He took a step closer and knelt beside Kamui to look at the boy fully.

"Oy, oy." Touya called him. "Didn't that antisocial guy said he'd kill this guy if the cover was in any way changed?"

"It's okay. I won't touch him." Yuki said as he looked at Kamui. "He looks like he's just sleeping. But there's something off about him."

"Of course, that's because he's not breathing." Touya, who was now behind Yuki, said. Fuuma also looked at Kamui this time.

"Oy, doesn't that mean he's already dead?" Fuuma asked. Even if Kamui was just a look-alike of his prince, he still didn't want the boy to die, at least not while he looked exactly like the prince.

"But I don't think he's dead." Yuki reached his hand out to Kamui, mostly but not really touching the boy. "He felt warm even from this distance."

"But he'll die sooner or later if he doesn't breathe soon." Touya said quite calmly, as if they're discussing what menu should they give to a particular customer.

Kamui lay as still as a statue and Fuuma couldn't help but stare at him longingly. He really wanted to go back to the dimension where he came from immediately. But this kid also needed some help and he thought they might get to their goal sooner if he'd help too.

"I'll take a walk outside." Fuuma said as he stood up. He looked at Yuki with a serious expression. "Can you please take a look at him for a while? I won't take long."

"Huh?" Touya asked in annoyance. "On top of staying here for free, not ordering anything, having a fight with me, the owner, you now want to ask my wife to take good care of this brat? No way! We're busy downstairs, you know!"

"Sure, I'll look after him while you're in your walk." Yuki said. "Take your time."

"Oy, Yuuki!" Touya exclaimed in frustration.

"I won't be long." Fuuma hurriedly sprinted passed them before he disappeared behind the door.

"He'll help look for the piece of Kamui-kun's soul, won't he?" Yuki turned to Touya.

"Are you sure you want to help these people?" Touya asked in concern. He sighed when Yuki smiled at him and nodded. "You're too kind for your own good." Yuki merely chuckled.

"I hope they find this poor boy's soul soon." He said as he glanced at Kamui again.

"I'm sure they will." Touya sighed. "I mean, just look at those guys. They're too excited and energetic for their own good."

"And even though they just met each other almost half an hour ago, they already had the harmony of a team. I think they'll be great friends in the future." Yuki said.

"Except that annoying guy, of course." Touya said, pertaining to Fuuma. Yuki merely chuckled as he hugged his husband.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: So, when will I be able to finally wake up? Aren't I the main character of this story? But the last time anyone heard my voice was during the start of the third chapter! I always get focused as the sleeping kid in Subaru's arms, or the lifeless Kamui, or the soulless Kamui, or the sleeping Kamui! Ain't you forgetting who the main cast is, Ren? Aren't you doing nothing but bully me lately?

Ren-sama: Wow, that's a lot of words coming out of the usually cool and quiet Kamui. By the way, at least call me Ren-sama. And aren't you happy? You're in Subaru's arms for more than one chapter!

Kamui: (*blush*) (couldn't think of anything to argue with that)

Subaru: (*coughs*) At least try to pretend you're not affected by Ren's teasing, Kamui.

Host: So, are you ready to answer my questions yet, Ren-san?

Ren-sama: (*sighed*) What kind of questions do you have anyway?

Host: Well, first, there are people asking if you're male or female?

Ren-sama: (*grins*) What do you think?

Host: (*can't think of the answer*) And question number two, why do you go by the name of Ren-sama instead of Ren-sensei, just like how writers address themselves?

Ren-sama: Ren-sama is Ren-sama.

Kamui: Oy, Ren. How about my part in the next chapter? Will I wake up?

Ren-sama: Oh, I wonder… (*evil grin*) I wonder what scene is best when you wake up…

Subaru: Don't you dare put me in some embarrassing situations again, like the kiss last time…

Kamui: Isn't that just energy transfer, right, Ren? Subaru, you're too perverted. And besides, I don't want my first kiss stolen while I'm asleep.

Ren-sama: Only Subaru can tell us if what he really did is a kiss or not. (*grin*) But I the writer, can tell too.

Host: Ah, Subaru-san left. His ears look like glowing red. Is it just me?

All: Please R&R!


	5. Chapter 5

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Thank you, really, for your awesome reviews! I think I'm liking my fan fict more and more! Sorry, but I can't answer any of your questions yet. That will very much be a spoiler if I do! People don't like spoilers, right? Well, here's the next chapter! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**Chapter 5**

"I can feel it over there!" Mokona's eyes were wide open while he pointed in the direction where most of the people gathered.

Subaru gritted his teeth. He didn't like crowded places as much as Kamui didn't. And that didn't change now even if there's no tree to feed anymore. He knew he still held the power of the Sakurazukamori even if he wasn't connected to the main tree anymore. The petals were still inside him, hidden from everyone until the kill was decided. He didn't thirst for blood anymore but those blade-like sakura petals still did, in his place.

"Subaru-san, are you alright?" Nokoru asked while the two of them were sprinting from people to people in the busy street of the market-looking town. They managed to save most of the people in their way but there were those who would slam directly into them and curse them from behind.

"There it is!" Mokona said, pointing to a macho-looking guy with menacing face. He looked like the model of what and how a goon should be. He also gave off the air of superiority and smugness. His size was at least twice as Kamui's.

"His size doesn't say a lot. He just looks twice as Kamui after all." Mokona mumbled. Subaru held the urge to comment about that.

"Well, if Kamui's soul was with him, then there's no mistaking it. Except for the physical features, everything about him reminded me of Kamui." Subaru suddenly said. Nokoru was even surprised when there's a light humor in the words of the otherwise cold and aloof male.

Little did he know that there was also pain hidden behind those words. Kamui _was _like that back then. Subaru now wondered if Kamui would have wished differently if he were still the smug and proud Kamui who lashed out at everyone, enjoying his power to the fullest by hurting his enemies with it. He wondered if the proud Kamui back then would have been able to defeat Fuuma easily if he hadn't warmed up to everyone. If Kamui hadn't been destroyed by his own kindness and innocence, would he have been in a better situation now? No, the Kamui back then wouldn't even think of saving something as cruel as the world. Subaru half-heartedly wished that Kamui was still the brat that he first met and not the broken Kamui that he knew now. But the Sakurazukamori's other half didn't wish for that. Kamui had gotten close to him because of that warmth. He didn't want to deny the Kamui that had changed for everyone, for the world.

Nokoru, oblivious of Subaru's thoughts, also chuckled at what the Sakurazukamori said. "You mean that cute little guy had the same attitude as this one?"

"The Kamui has worse attitude than any thugs." Mokona said while nodding, making him look like he was re-living what he remembered of Kamui.

"You know Kamui?" It was Subaru's turn to look surprised.

"Yup, from Yuuko-san." Mokona said. "Ah, he's leaving!"

They looked at the guy with the strong built again. The guy was about to turn around and they saw that riding on his back was a child about three or four years of age. That totally made Subaru and Nokoru stop.

"Do you think he kidnapped that kid?" Nokoru asked Subaru quietly.

"I don't care." Subaru said seriously. "As long as I get the piece of Kamui's soul back, I don't give a damn about anyone else."

Nokoru saw in Subaru's mismatched eyes that the guy wasn't just saying that to boost his ego. He seriously meant what he said. _"So you really do care about Kamui-san…"_

They followed the man discreetly until they saw him turn into a corner. They also turned in that corner only to see the man being surrounded by other thugs. And by the looks of it, he was not one of them.

"Oh, is that your son, Hibiki?" One of the thugs sneered. "I think he'll look better with some bruise here and there."

"Don't you dare!" The guy named Hibiki growled at them and they instinctively took a step backward.

When faced with fear, however, Subaru had grown used to see people losing it and making their end sooner than expected. He usually had that experience whenever his targets would lose it and attack him. And that was exactly what happened. The gangsters all attacked Hibiki only to be too shocked when they got thrown away without Hibiki even touching them.

"Wow." Nokoru said in amazement when he saw at least a dozen people flying in midair. Mokona clapped his little hands at the spectacular sight. Only Subaru had the same reaction as the gangsters. He was shocked beyond belief. When Nokoru turned to him, he voiced, "Why are you so surprised? It's not that big of a deal to actually make people fly away, right?"

"No, it's not that…" Subaru said quietly, recovering himself. "That man… He used Kamui's power just now… I felt its presence in the air… That was definitely Kamui's power."

"You mean Kamui-san has the ability to make people fly too?" Nokoru said in amazement.

"Kamui has the power to destroy the world." Subaru said seriously. Mokona nodded in understanding while Nokoru couldn't react at all.

"W-Wait, if he's using Kamui-san's power, then he also somehow has the power to destroy the world?" Nokoru shouted a little louder and soon the two and a half of them already got Hibiki's attention.

"You want to be thrown away too?" He asked with his obviously menacing voice, wearing a menacing face, and having a menacing stance.

"That power you used just now, can I have it back?" Subaru said quietly. He was ready to just kill the man if the latter wouldn't give it back. Nokoru saw that decision in his mismatched eyes and immediately interrupted the tense atmosphere.

"No, we're just passing by when we saw what happened." Nokoru laughed. He blocked Subaru's view of the man, making himself stand in the middle of the two, just in case. "You're amazing, really! But we're not one of those thugs, you know."

"Really?" Hibiki said in suspicious eyes. "Then there's no need to protect your friends, is there?"

"Just so you know, I'm not really protecting him." Nokoru said. "I'm protecting your son." The blonde then looked behind his shoulder, gazing directly into Subaru's mismatched eyes. "In case you're forgetting, Subaru-san, there's an at least three or four years old son on his back."

Hibiki snorted. "So you're saying that friend of yours can defeat me? Try me then."

"If I try," Subaru voiced coldly. "It'll be a second too late for you to realize that you're dead." He then looked at Nokoru. "Just so you know, I can still easily kill him even if you block my path."

And without warning, the three of them, Subaru, Mokona, and Nokoru, were thrown really hard onto the other side of the street, making the on-lookers curious. The shocked was written on their faces before they were able to recover. After Subaru stood up, he saw that the man was nowhere to be found. He gritted his teeth and cursed under his breathe.

"I thought you can easily kill him." Nokoru asked in annoyance. He too stood up just as quickly as Subaru, if only because people were looking at them with curiosity. Subaru just had to provoke the man. _And look what had become of them? Thrown like a rag on the street._

"And that's the power of The Kamui that Yuuko-san was always talking about." Mokona said with smugness, as if showing off how powerful his son was.

"I didn't think Kamui had such an enormous power…" Subaru voiced quietly, more to himself than to his companions. "Kamui must have always repressed his power and unconsciously held back even when he faced Fuuma… He was just too kind…"

"What's that about me facing him?" The three of them looked to the side when they heard Fuuma's voice.

"I thought you'd stay in the room?" Nokoru asked, slightly suspicious of his sudden appearance.

"I got bored and wanted to take a walk." Fuuma said with usual annoyed look. "And what are you glaring at, antisocial psychopath?"

Subaru's glare only deepened. "You left Kamui alone?" His voice was quiet but it accusing. He glared at the other ravenhead for a while before he closed his eyes, remembering deeply how he also did the same thing in the past. _He also left Kamui alone… _And his anger turned into deep, excruciating regret and guilt. He felt like choking. _How much of a hypocrite could he get..? _He looked down and swallowed the lump that seemed to have inhabited his throat. "Sorry…"

Fuuma was about to argue when he heard the apology. He was a little surprised that he wasn't able to retaliate at all, especially because Subaru truly meant it. And he also thought that Subaru wasn't just apologizing to him, but also to someone else. _Kamui, he guessed..?_ Instead, he changed the topic. "So, what are you two doing here, creating such a big scene in the middle of the busy street?"

"We don't have time to explain!" Nokoru looked at Subaru and latter nodded in assent. "Come with us!" He voiced just as he and Subaru started running after the man that had just practically thrown the two of them on the other side of the street with ease.

It practically shocked Subaru. It wasn't as if his guard was down. But he still wasn't able to do anything. He hadn't had the chance to actually fight Kamui so he didn't know the extent of the boy's power. But he was sure that when Kamui fought with Fuuma, he wasn't that powerful. _And _that_ earlier was merely _a piece_ of Kamui's soul…_

They ran after the man for hours, turning into different alleys, and asking different people about him. But their pursuit was still in vain. In the end, they had to go back to the inn where they would stay for the night. They went back to their room quietly.

Subaru glanced at Kamui and approached him. He brushed Kamui's cheek with the back of his gloved fingers. He felt more miserable than earlier. He thought he'd gotten stronger when he became the Sakurazukamori. But it seemed he was just as weak as he was back then. Back then when he couldn't even save his own sister. _He couldn't even give a single feather back to Kamui's body… He was so useless when he's needed… _

Subaru gritted his teeth harshly, trying to break his jaw in the process.

He went beside the window again and sat back there. Kamui looked more relaxed lying on the mat than sitting up and leaning on him so he didn't change Kamui's position anymore. He looked so still and beautiful, even in his lifeless body. _If only he could give at least one feather to that lifeless form… just a single warm feather was enough… _Subaru closed his eyes and tried his best to swallow the heavy guilt and pain in his heart. Fuuma lay on the floor again without any regard of others. He was lying in parallel with Kamui. His eyes were closed but no one knew if he was asleep. Even when tired, he still looked gorgeous and cool. Nokoru sat at the opposite wall of the window, where he sat earlier, at least two meters beside the door. His eyes were closed as well. One of his knees was bent upwards where he leaned one arm. Mokona slept on his lap. They were too tired to speak and too tired to eat. And besides, they didn't have any money anyway.

Now that Subaru thought about his sister, everything came back to him in a flash. He was quite shocked at himself. He hadn't thought of Seishirou during these past few hours, not even the name brushed his mind. Just a few days ago, he could hardly concentrate in his work because he often dreamed of the man. All day and night, he thought of nothing but Seishirou, even if he's in front Kamui's apartment. Even when he could see Kamui crying his tired heart to sleep, all Subaru could think of was his own loneliness gripping through him, preventing him to really care about others.

But now, he didn't even have the chance to think about himself because of Kamui's affair. It was somehow shocking and at the same time frightening. _What if he was actually caring for Kamui now? His heart was still dead for romantic feelings, but what if the Subaru which he killed back when Seishirou died was coming out of his grave? _Subaru couldn't help but shiver. He didn't want to experience pain anymore, at least not because of people other than Hokuto and Seishirou. He was much too tired for pain. He didn't want to love anyone again, in any kind of way. _But he also couldn't help it with Kamui… The boy needed his help after all… not that he liked the boy in any way other than how loving a comrade would feel…_

"Everyone, we've got a call from Yuuko-san." Mokona said, which made all of them open their eyes and look at him. Even Subaru was taken out of his daze when he heard the name. Somehow he didn't like the idea of the Witch calling them.

"How?" Nokoru asked in curiosity, looking at his lap where the fur ball was seated.

"Just watch. This is one of Mokona's 109 Secret abilities!" Mokona said proudly before the stone on his forehead glowed significantly until it widened and formed a white screen on the wall adjacent to Subaru and Nokoru's side of the walls.

Yuuko appeared on the screen and greeted them enthusiastically, only to be received by silence and exhaustion from their group. They were really too tired for greetings and lively conversations. "What's wrong, everyone? And here I am about to tell you more about the pieces of Kamui's soul."

"What about it?" Fuuma said with furrowed eyebrows. He was annoyed that he actually directly helped with Subaru and Nokoru in finding the kid's soul. And he thought he could just discreetly look for it. _And even with that, they still weren't able to find out anything about its holder. _That, _that _was what was making his insides boil right now.

"Actually, the pieces of Kamui's soul have a definite number." Yuuko said as she looked behind her shoulder and asked Watanuki to give her some sake. The latter complained that he was still grilling some pork. This short period of time made Subaru and the others more alert. That's why when Yuuko turned around again, the three and a half men's ears were fully alert. "There are thirteen pieces, to be exact."

"How do you know this?" Subaru asked. He was glad that the number wasn't close to infinite, but he was still a little doubtful about the exact number of Kamui's soul pieces.

"Normally, people's soul will disappear if it was ripped apart so forcibly." Yuuko explained, not wanting to answer Subaru's question immediately. "But since Kamui is The Kamui, his soul still remained undamaged even if it was shattered into pieces. Let's just say I got this information from a certain someone. And that someone is a reliable source so there's no mistake about it."

"I see." Nokoru looked suddenly hopeful. "At least there's only thirteen pieces to find."

"Don't get too overconfident yet." Yuuko said seriously. "There are billions and billions of dimensions and there are only thirteen pieces to find."

"What a way to bring our hopes down." Fuuma snorted. He was now sitting while his hands served as his support to prop him upward.

Yuuko ignored him. "Let me continue. Each of Kamui's thirteen pieces has his power embedded in it. Though it's not as powerful as Kamui's overall power."

"That explains the earlier power surge coming from the man." Nokoru mumbled but still enough for all of them to hear.

"Kamui isn't that strong when he fought with the Dragons of Earth." Subaru said. He was more wondering than explaining. "The man earlier was able to throw me to the other side of the street even though my guard is up."

On the screen, Watanuki had already finished delivering the pork and the sake to Yuuko, which delighted the witch above anything. She then turned to the screen again and faced Subaru. "That's because Kamui's mind back then was clouded by thoughts of how to save his twin star. He unconsciously didn't fight with his full power because he was too frightened he'd kill the other Kamui, Fuuma Monou. That's why you weren't able to witness his real power, the power to either save or destroy the world."

"Oy, why is my name mentioned?" Fuuma asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Fuuma-san, that's not the question you should be asking, right?" Nokoru said. "Shouldn't you say 'does he really have the power to destroy the world'?"

"It's not you. It's the Fuuma in the dimension where we came from." Subaru answered, ignoring Nokoru's comment. Fuuma just snorted in reply.

"If Kamui had been the Dragon of Earth, that dimension wouldn't have just been cleansed." Yuuko said as she toasted the small cup with the Black Mokona and sipped her sake. "It would have completely disappeared. That's why Kamui, having a power stronger than Fuuma, was fated to be the Leader of the Seals."

"Fate again?" Subaru mumbled. He gritted his teeth in silence.

"It's inevitable, Sakurazukamori. And by the way, there's one more important thing to know." Yuuko gulped from the bottle of sake and her expression turned serious. "Among those thirteen, the one you should prioritize is the search of the _core_."

"The core?" Nokoru asked, voicing their question. "What do you mean by that, Yuuko-san?" Subaru also listened with more intensity than he intended.

Yuuko chew a piece of pork. "That core is his heart, or rather, the heart of his soul."

"W-Wha–?" Subaru seemed to have lost the ability to form comprehensible word from surprise. Fuuma and Nokoru were only gaping at the now happily munching witch.

"Well, I did say that's his heart. But I don't mean literally his heart." Yuuko said, thinking Subaru was thinking something along those lines. "It means that every soul has a core. I'm sure an onmyouji like you have heard of it somewhere. The core is the one that some forbidden chant destroys during an exorcism and such. Because when the core was destroyed, the soul was very much destroyed as well."

"I don't know anything about that." Subaru said. "I don't use any forbidden spell."

Yuuko ignored his explanation. "When you find it, other pieces of Kamui's soul will also return. It's just like a signal that will call out to his soul's other pieces and all of them will return to him in an instance."

"That's some good news." Nokoru smiled.

"And if you didn't find it, Kamui will still die even if you find the other twelve pieces." Yuuko drank the rest of her sake from the bottle, not bothering to pour it in a cup anymore.

"W-Why didn't tell that to us sooner?" Subaru exclaimed. Nokoru looked at him with slight surprise. He didn't think the cool and aloof onmyouji could raise his voice that loud. Not that he could blame Subaru, especially after what they just heard.

"I forgot." Yuuko simply answered, more amused than apologetic, which made Fuuma's eyebrow twitch in irritation. "Oh, and take note that the core is the most difficult piece to find. I don't think that even Mokona can sense it. After all, it is The Kamui's core. It is where his wish to disappear lies."

Subaru looked like cold water was poured down on him. He wasn't able to talk back. _So that piece was where Kamui's wish was… _He now wondered if there was some way to restore Kamui back to life without searching for the piece that would make the boy want to end his life again. _Kamui wished so badly to disappear… _

"Why did you want to bring back Kamui-san's soul anyway? You look like you're unconcerned but you're actually as agitated as this guy here, right?" Fuuma said, pointing his thumb in Subaru's direction. Nokoru was starting to have the impression that Fuuma was too observant for his own good.

Now it was Yuuko's turn to slightly twitch. She sighed and thought for a long time before she talked again. "It's because not even The Kamui can offer me an equal amount of compensation in order to disappear. And you know what Kamui's power is."

"The power equal to the power of the Gods." Subaru said. "He has the power to either save or destroy the world…"

"That's right. You experienced first hand how powerful a piece is." Yuuko gave him a thumb-up and a beam. "And what do you think will happen if it gets in the wrong hands?"

"They can almost destroy their own dimension?" Nokoru was the only one who seriously tried to think about it. Subaru was more concerned in getting the pieces now to actually listen further and Fuuma was so tired he didn't want to think of anything unnecessary anymore.

"Correct, 'almost' is the right term because they can't really destroy or save a dimension without the whole of Kamui's power. Also be reminded that these pieces tend to get unusually powerful when Kamui is near."

"You mean it resonates with Kamui." Nokoru concluded and Yuuko answered with a nod.

"Every piece holds different amount of power, depending on how huge that particular piece of his soul is." Yuuko said, not bothering to get all of their attention anymore. "It means that there might be pieces that are either too weak or too powerful even for the four of you to handle."

"Another blow to end our hope." Fuuma muttered as he let himself relax. In the end, no matter what would happen, it's not his problem and it's not his prince whose life would end anyway. So he was basically taking things in complete idleness, or so he forced to think. Kamui very much looked like his prince that he couldn't help but feel dread in the news. _He wondered how his prince was doing now… or if he was still alive…_

"But those pieces are nothing in comparison to the power the core holds." Yuuko said seriously, though her cheeks were starting to have pinkish color from too much alcohol. She's starting to hiccup too. The Black Mokona had long gone to sleep. "It almost holds half of The Kamui's power. So it is best that you find it last. Because at least then, Kamui will have had the power to fight whoever or whatever possesses that piece." She hiccupped again before she totally passed out from drunkenness. Watanuki approached the screen and muttered some apology before the screen totally blanked out.

All of them were in utter silence just as the glow on White Mokona's forehead vanished. That's until Nokoru chuckled. "Look at the bright side. At least, by having smaller number of pieces to find, we won't be too old when we return home, probably."

Subaru walked towards where Kamui was and sat beside the boy. "I promise I'll get that piece back to you tomorrow." He whispered as he stroked Kamui's hair again.

"Well, shall we sleep for now?" Nokoru asked in enthusiasm, fighting back a grin when he saw how Subaru looked at Kamui's sleeping face.

"Without having dinner?" All of them turned to the door and saw Yuki carrying a big tray filled with foods. Fuuma looked at the foods suspiciously and Yuki saw that. "Don't worry, it doesn't have any charge."

"Because it's all leftover." Fuuma surmised, and Yuki nodded. "Well, better this than nothing."

"You're right!" Nokoru said and he thanked Yuki for the food.

"Ah, by the way." Yuki said with innocent expression. "I thought I heard a female's voice coming from here earlier."

"Ah, that's nothing!" Nokoru laughed it off easily even without explaining anything. Yuki just shrugged it off and chuckled as well. Afterwards, he left the room while they ate. Subaru took a small amount of food, still thinking about the pieces of Kamui's soul. _He would definitely get it tomorrow, even if he had to kill all of them._

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: I'm still asleep here?

Ren-sama: Ah, yes. But you'll wake up next chapter… probably.

Kamui: Probably?

Subaru: (*dark aura*) Oy, why do you let Fuuma call me a psychopath? And why do I keep on stroking Kamui's hair?

Ren-sama: I don't know to you. You're the one letting him call you that and also the one doing the action. Why ask me?

Subaru: (*cursed under his breathe*) (*muttering while walking away*)

Host: (Heard some words like 'Fuuma', 'kill', 'hair', 'soft', and 'beautiful') What's that supposed to mean?

Ren-sama: I don't know. Maybe he really is a psychopath.

Kamui: (*watched Subaru's back with longing eyes*) Don't worry, I'll still love you even if you're a psychopath…

Host: Ah. He looked back. I think he heard us.

Ren-sama: I have nothing to do with the 'psychopath' thing. It was all Fuuma's fault.

Host: (*mumble*) Cleaning your hands, huh… even though you're the author…

All: Thank you for reading! Please leave your comments! ˆoˆ


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

It was a fine morning. He usually spent it while mourning and thinking of bitter and agonizing things. But now, he didn't have any time to think about any of his usual thoughts and regrets regarding Seishirou. He still loved the man, he still did. But he just had to momentarily place thinking of him as secondary because he had to think of how to find that man Hibiki again and, on top of that, how to fight him.

He opened his eyes lazily because he wasn't used to too much sunlight anymore. He had learned to practically live in the darkness and somehow forgotten that morning sunlight tended to hurt the eyes. He slowly sat up and immediately looked for Kamui.

The boy was still as silent and motionless as before. It was kind of unnerving to see Kamui so still and soulless, lying on the mat covered with a coat. He knew he could never get used to the way Kamui cried every day and night, regretting things that he couldn't get back anymore and grieving over the people that had abandoned and left him all alone. But he could also never get used to the Kamui now. He was as still as a statue that it was making him looked like a very beautiful mannequin. No, he looked like a beautiful sleeping god with that small face of his. His eyes were closed, making his long eye lashes brush his upper cheeks. His lips… _He didn't want to look at that. _His face was calm. It was too calm it was disturbing. He wanted nothing but the lively Kamui who had learned to open up to the rest of them, the one who played some pranks towards Sorata just to annoy the monk. _How he wanted Kamui to be alive… not merely surviving, but living…_

"AH!" Mokona's eyes fluttered open. His loud voice woke Fuuma up and the raven immediately grabbed the fur ball and squeezed him just so he would stay quiet at least when other people were sleeping.

Nokoru, who saw the furry animal's eyes fluttered open, immediately asked. "Did you feel the piece of Kamui's soul nearby?"

Mokona, which was still being squeezed by Fuuma, nodded. "Yup! It's near! It's very, very near!"

That alerted Subaru and immediately grabbed Mokona from Fuumas hands. "Where?"

"Downstairs." Mokona said. His bright blue eyes still struck them as something extraordinary. It's quite awe-inspiring, to say the least.

Subaru immediately took off with Mokona in his hands. Nokoru who was still a little dazed immediately followed. Fuuma yawned and went back to guarding Kamui's body, though if anyone asked, he'd say he simply went back to sleep.

"_Fuuma Monou, from now on, you will offer me your whole life, your whole body, and your soul. You will live for me, and no one but me."_

"_I bow before you and pledge my loyalty to you and only you, my prince, forever."_

Fuuma opened his sharp golden eyes again and they immediately darted on the sleeping teen across the room, in parallel to him. _Kamui looked so much like his prince that it was becoming so unnerving. _His handsome face, his petite and slender stature, his pale complexion, his hands, his lips… Fuuma gritted his teeth as he closed his eyes again. His left hand unconsciously touched his right ring finger and found out it felt so bare without the ring. _"I'm sorry, prince… I lost the ring…"_

The two males, one raven and one blonde, descended the stairs with much swiftness not normal for ordinary humans to have. They scanned the place for the guy, but he was nowhere to be seen.

"Mokona-san, aren't you just making some mistakes?" Nokoru asked quietly. "The man isn't here."

"He's not making any mistake." Subaru answered even before Mokona could react to the accusation. "I can feel Kamui's power too. It's too powerful its presence covers the entire shop."

"I see." Nokoru said, clearly more convinced at Subaru's words. "But it doesn't change the fact that the man isn't here."

"Hey, isn't that the son of that Hibiki guy?" Mokona pointed to a child buying some cake in the counter.

"Yup, that's the kid. Good work, Mokona-san!" Nokoru chirped happily. Mokona looked proud that he was able to help. "If we follow that kid, then we will be able to see his father again!"

"You're right, Nokoru!" Mokona said delightedly.

"Something's off…" Subaru mumbled, but Nokoru and Mokona didn't hear him. They all watched the boy until the latter left the shop before they followed closely behind.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Fuuma yawned, feeling better that he was able to sleep more. Well, he really wanted to guard the boy but then Kamui was asleep so he wouldn' be able to go anywhere anyway. He turned to his side, facing Kamui. He was still a little groggy from waking up and he saw that there was something missing somewhere. Then he immediately jolted out of bed when he saw that Kamui was missing.

"Damn, did that stuck up guy carry the boy?" Fuuma mused for a while. "Or did the soulless body moved on its own?" He shuddered at the last thought before he went out of the room and descended the stairs too.

He cleared his throat to get Yuki's attention. Yuki smiled and asked if he wanted to order something. "No, I was wondering if my companions carried the boy together with them."

"You mean Kamui-kun?" Yuki asked. He thought for a while. "Sorry, I didn't think I saw him pass here. But I saw Nokoru-san and Sumeragi-san together with the furred animal earlier. Kamui-kun isn't with them though…"

"Shit." He cursed before he left the shop too. He knew that those two guys left without taking Kamui with them. He just slept for a while and then the guy was now missing! _Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it! _And then he immediately stopped in his tracks, making the person behind him bump into him. The person cursed before he overtook Fuuma. _Wait… It's not as if that boy was his problem… So no matter what happen to the boy had no connection to him… right? _He gritted his teeth and walked briskly in the crowded place.

The kid was holding the cake and was walking as fast as his little strides could carry him. Subaru and Nokoru were following discreetly from behind. The boy turned in the corner where Subaru and Nokoru got into a fight yesterday. They walked faster until they got into the corner, and saw the same thugs yesterday now circling the child.

"So sad your father isn't here today." The guy who looked like their leader said with a sneer. "Since he's not here today, you'll be the one to get our revenge!"

"How filthy." Nokoru voiced with much coolness behind them. Subaru was behind him, watching the scene silently. "Don't you think you're being a little too much of a coward?"

"What did you say?!" The man with the bandanna snarled. "Are you picking a fight with us, The Clamps?!"

"The gramps?" Mokona asked with too much innocence.

"The Clamps!" The leader shouted in anger and humiliation. "Get them, everyone!"

Nokoru smirked, which surprised Subaru a little. The blonde looked too confident. The onmyouji didn't know someone who looked so skinny could fight. _But Kamui was skinnier than him… _No, Kamui was slender. Nokoru dodged every attacker with much swiftness and elegance, and beat them with much grace and professionalism. And with that, Subaru immediately knew the guy wasn't just a simple Leader of some corporation. His swiftness and fighting skills could almost equal to Arashi or Sorata. And in just some minutes, all the enemies were out cold on the ground, with only the smiling Nokoru standing in the middle of them. _This person was not an ordinary guy…_

"Who are you?" Subaru asked as he looked at Nokoru with narrowed eyes, not realizing he looked so feminine while hugging Mokona on his chest.

"Ah, he's running away!" Nokoru said, not answering the question thrown at him. He immediately ran after the boy and Suabru had no choice but to follow. He was technically swifter than Nokoru and in no time he was already ahead of the blonde. He was the first to catch up to the boy and also the first to be thrown away by Kamui's power.

Subaru looked shocked and Nokoru was stupefied. Only mokona managed to conclude the things in front of them. "The one holding the piece of The Kamui's soul isn't the Hibiki, but his son!"

The son looked surprised to see Mokona at first, but then decided he better ran for now. Subaru immediately ran after him, leaving Nokoru behind. The latter also followed in the pursuit and soon, the son turned into another corner and the pursuers found themselves in some farm-looking village. It was so different from the crowded street they just saw earlier. The boy continued to run and soon entered into some shabby old nipa hut.

Subaru who had lost his temper immediately kicked the frail door and entered the house, surprising a middle-aged woman currently cooking in the far corner of the hut. The boy immediately hid behind her.

"W-What do you want?" The woman asked in both trepidation and worry. She immediately looked at her son and asked him while holding his arm. "Did you steal something again!?" The boy looked at him with wide eyes and immediately shook his head.

"Actually," Nokoru entered the house too. "We apologize for suddenly barging into your hut. But there's something we own that the boy has right now."

"I'll never give the feather to anyone!" Subaru and Nokoru were a bit surprised that the boy suddenly talked. _And he knew that it was the feather they wanted. _"Father gave it to me as a birthday gift! I won't give it to anyone!"

"You mean that beautiful feather?" The woman asked the boy before she looked at Subaru and Nokoru. "I think you're mistaken, sirs. My son didn't steal that one. Hibiki brought it for him from a store in the main street."

"It's Kamui's." Subaru said. He didn't care if it was some gift or dowry or even bribe. "I need it back. Kamui will die without it."

"I'll die without it too! Bleh!" The boy stuck out his tongue to the two males.

"What are you two doing in my house!?" Subaru and Nokoru turned around and saw Hibiki reddening with anger. "Get out of here! Or do you want me to call a police!?"

The boy immediately ran to his side and hid. "They want to steal the feather you gave me!"

"No, we're trying to get it back." Nokoru sighed. He knew it wouldn't be easy, but he didn't think explaining things would be this hard. "That feather is part of our friend's soul. We need it back. We beg you."

Hibiki's eyebrows creased before he snorted. "Who're you tricking? You think I'm some two year old–?"

"Oto-san!" Hibiki's speech was cut off by the scream of his son behind him. They all looked and saw, to Subaru and Nokoru's surprise, Kamui. He was holding the boy in a firm grip though his amethyst eyes still held no life.

"Kamui!" Subaru immediately panicked and almost flew beside Kamui in just a second. He didn't care about the boy for now. He wanted to know what's happening and why Kamui, who was supposedly soulless, was here, standing in his own two feet. He touched Kamui's cheeks with his palm and knew there was something wrong. He could feel it even though he was wearing gloves. "You're… so cold…"

Kamui lost his balance and fell, almost. Subaru was there so the latter was immediately able to catch him even before he even fell half-way. Subaru knelt on one knee and examined if Kamui needed some life transfer again. Nokoru immediately went beside Subaru and Kamui.

Mokona hopped on Nokoru's shoulder. "Mokona thinks he will not make it if his soul doesn't come soon."

They all looked at the boy, who was still adamant on hiding the feather. Kamui's lifeless amethyst eyes opened again and looked at the boy too. The boy was initially surprised at Kamui's lifeless expression. Hibiki and his wife watched in utter disbelief, especially when the feather, which was in the boy's pocket, started to glow.

"The Kamui's soul is calling out to his body." Mokona said. "Boy, I think you need to give the feather back to the real owner now."

The boy was on the brink of crying now, holding the feather with all his might. Hibiki sighed and walked towards his son. "I'll buy you a new one. Just give it to them."

"But Oto-san!" The boy started to cry. "I… This feather has powers… I want this feather…"

"Do you want the boy to die because you didn't give his feather back?" His mother was the one who gently asked the question. It seemed to have woken up the boy and he looked at Kamui again.

"Kamui…" Subaru called quietly, afraid that Kamui's string of life would break if he called too loud. Kamui was still looking at the boy, and Subaru knew he could kill the boy in one swoop if he really wished to. Unlike Kamui, the boy had no experience whatsoever in real fight and Subaru could easily do anything he wanted in just a split second. In just one second, he'd be able to take the feather back. Just one second…

"Not so fast, boy." The father who sensed Subaru's killing aura immediately walked over his son and hid him from Subaru's eyes. "I can feel too much killing intent coming from you. I'm a member of some infamous gang once so I knew what that heavy aura coming from you means."

"I'll kill anyone who'll dare hurt Kamui." Subaru voiced coldly, still holding Kamui safely in his arms while kneeling. He didn't have much patient to begin with, and he was on the brink of just relying on his killer instinct, the Sakurazukamori instinct, just to get the feather back.

"I don't care who you are or what your circumstances are. But I'll fight you to death if you dare hurt my son." Hibiki answered firmly, making a defensive stance.

"If that boy doesn't give me–" Subaru stopped when the boy came out from behind his father and walked slowly to where Subaru and Kamui were. Subaru immediately tensed and held Kamui tighter, not taking his predator-like eyes off the kid.

"Relax." Nokoru gently tapped his shoulder when the latter didn't sense any hostility from the boy.

"If Oto-san will get hurt just because of this feather, then it's all yours." The boy said. He went nearer and placed the feather he's holding on Kamui's chest. Almost immediately, the feather's glow considerably brightened even more as it slowly sank inside Kamui's chest. Soon, the glow covered Kamui's whole body as it started to breathe again and began to get warm. Tiny wings appeared on Kamui's back, which caught their attention, before it disappeared again.

"He's… He's an Angel..?" The boy asked in amazement.

Subaru smiled at him. "No, he's a Seal."

"Eh?" Nokoru asked in confusion just as Subaru carried Kamui in his arms. The latter had lost consciousness after the feather went inside him, not that he was really conscious anyway.

"Yay! Hooray, for now!" Mokona sang delightedly. "The Kamui is alive again!" Subaru couldn't agree more. Kamui felt so warm in his arms. He kissed Kamui's hair and nuzzled on it for a while, savoring the warmth that seeped out from there. He felt so alive. _He's alive again…_

Hibiki and his wife were both too amazed and shocked at the same time to speak. In the end, they just smiled at one another before they included their son in their family hug.

"I guess I'm late." They all turned and saw Fuuma scratching his head in annoyance. "I was too sure Kamui went the other way…"

"Dumb." Mokona voiced, and he immediately received a punch from Fuuma.

Subaru wanted to punch Fuuma too for not looking out for Kamui. But all that mattered now was that one of the thirteen pieces was already inside Kamui and he would not die, at least for now.

"Do you think it's the core?" Nokoru asked after a while, still looking at the quiet heaving of the teen's chest. _He's breathing now…_

"No, Mokona doesn't think so." Mokona hopped on Nokoru's shoulder again after being thrown on the ground by Fuuma's punch. "The core isn't something so weak."

"Will the Angel, n-no, er, Seal, be alright?" The boy asked after a while. Subaru looked at him and patted his head.

"Yes." He smiled for real, even if just a tad. "Kamui is alright now…" He hugged Kamui tighter before he stood up and faced the boy's parents. "I apologize for my earlier behavior."

"You mean for barging into my house, breaking the door, frightening my wife, making my son cry, and then thinking up of ways to kill him?" Hibiki asked in seriousness, one eyebrow arched.

"Yes." Subaru answered, also wearing a serious face, before he looked at the boy. "And thank you."

"I'm cooking for breakfast." The wife said with an unsure smile. "Do you want to stay for a while?"

"And don't tell us you don't want to." HIbiki said threateningly, pushing Subaru inside the house again. Nokoru and Fuuma followed silently. They all sat circling the table. "My wife's cooking skills far exceeds those of the chef couples where you're staying right now."

"Ah, how did you know–?" Nokoru asked while blinking.

"Huh?" Hibiki growled. "You think I won't try to find out who you are after you'd tried to pick a fight with me? I thought you're members of some organizations, only to find out that you're new to the place."

Fuuma ate silently beside Mokona, who was eating quite voraciously. Nokoru chuckled as he ate with so much poise. "We apologize for that, not that we really attacked you."

"Yes, I thought you'd hurt oto-san too so I threw you both on the other side of the street." The boy said while he ate delightedly. It was the first time there were so many people eating breakfast together with him after all.

"I see." Subaru said. He was barely eating anything, not that the food didn't taste good. He was just used to eating so little and smoking a lot ever since Hokuto died. He gripped the spoon tighter when he remembered the man who killed Hokuto, the man whom he hated the most and yet also loved the most… even now. _How he missed Seishirou… _

Kamui steered in his arms, which made him stop eating altogether. He looked at Kamui worriedly until Hibiki spoke.

"Ain't he full of life now?" Hibiki said. "Unlike earlier."

"Yes, I hope…" Subaru mumbled before he continued eating.

After they finished they all thanked the family again before they left. They also thanked Yuki and Touya for letting them stay in the shop for free.

"Don't come back." Touya said. His expression was serious but there was a total lack of seriousness in his voice. Yuki merely chuckled.

"Thank good care of Kamui-kun." Yuki said. "And take care too, all of you."

"Of course." Nokoru smiled. "Farewell, Yuki-san, Touya-san."

They went to their room and decided to just leave the dimension from there. On Mokona's back grew two huge wings and everything went blindingly bright. This time though, Subaru immediately opened his eyes and found that they were already traveling in between dimensions, like they were inside some bright circle elevator traveling upwards. And before he realized it, they were already in their next destination.

.

~tbc~

.

**Thank you for all of your supports and wonderfuls reviews!**

**.**

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: (*burning with fury*) What's with that? You said I'll wake up now!

Ren-sama: Well, I did say 'probably.' And besides, didn't you already open your eyes?

Kamui: "Kamui's lifeless amethyst eyes opened again" my ass!

Ren-sama: Stop saying bad words, Kamui. You're making your fans cry.

Kamui: Tch. And what's with Subaru always thinking about Seishirou? Can't you do anything about that? Like slam his head on the wall or something and make his memory about that man disappear!

Ren-sama: (*sighed*) I can't believe Kamui is this desperate. Subaru might kill me if I try something like that, you know.

Subaru: It's good thing you know what will happen if you dare make me think of anything other than Seishirou.

Ren-sama: Ah. Kamui's sulking again.

Subaru: (*looked at Kamui in concern before he looked at Ren-sama*) Perhaps you can do the same to Kamui and make him forget about his feelings for me. It's only hurting him.

Kamui: (*glared at Ren-sama*)

Ren-sama: Why do I feel that he's saying something like "Dare do that and I'll destroy your laptop"? No! I don't want that! Just kill me but please keep my laptop outside all of this!

Subaru and Kamui: (*smirk*) Now we know what to threaten if you dare disobey us.

Ren-sama: Everyone, please help me… Please tell these two they're a really cute couple and all. Please R&R!


	7. Chapter 7

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Please be informed that I might use different places in different anime because I have no idea what other dimensions might look like. So, in short, some of the places that will be mentioned here and in the latter chapters are not of my own creation. Nevertheless, enjoy! ˆoˆ**

**P.S.**

**Also, please don't kill me, everyone… T_T I'm really sorry but the next few chapters have already been written. And the concept I have for this story is more or less complete… so I can't make it so that Kamui remembers everything, not even Subaru… Please don't get disappointed. Kamui must not remember at first, because he might wish to disappear again if he did. Remember that Subaru still loves Seishirou here. So, you know… T_T But don't worry, I'll make it better in the future, I promise! And to compensate for your unheeded wishes, I'll make it a two chapter update!**

**.**

**Chapter 7**

"What is this place?" Nokoru mused, gazing at the countryside-looking town with people wearing hakama or kimono.

"Is it the dimension where I came from?" Fuuma asked, recognizing the similarity of his clothes with that of the local people.

"Nope, Mokona doesn't think so." Mokona said, also looking at the town from Nokoru's shoulder.

"This place is called Rukongai." An old man who was listening to their conversation said. They all looked at him. He had a graying hair and a balding head. And his accent was strange.

"Rukongai?" Fuuma asked, thinking if there was a place called Rukongai in where he came from, only to realize that the annoying fur ball might be right. This dimension really wasn't where he came from. _His prince wasn't here…_

"This place is a place where the ordinary and poor people live, lads." The old man said. "This dimension is called the Soul Society."

"You know of dimensions, old man?" Mokona asked.

"Be more respectful, Mokona-san." Nokoru said to the furry animal before he turned to the old man again.

"Yes, this dimension is a dimension that is tightly connected to another dimension called Hueco Mundo. That's where the Hollows live. Hollows are–"

"What's that?" Subaru interrupted the old mans' explanation and pointed at the seemingly separate part of the place where the buildings were grand and had the air of dominance and power.

"Ah, that's Seireitei." The old man answered while scratching his balding head. "That's where the rich and noble families live."

"I can feel the presence of The Kamui's soul coming from there!" Mokona pointed at the direction where Seireitei was. He jumped form Nokoru's shoulder and waved his small fluffy hands, signaling the others to follow.

"Let's go there now." Fuuma said in annoyance as he started walking, following Mokona. He wanted nothing than to get over the search for the pieces of the boy's soul over so they could search for his dimension next.

"No! Please don't go there!" The old man looked panic-stricken as he pleaded. There were now other people behind him, watching them in apprehension. "Ashura-ou lives there! We are already outsiders as it is. Please don't make our situation any worse."

"Of course." Nokoru answered, earning a glare from both Subaru and Fuuma. "If someone from this place suddenly trespassed in the place where the king is, the only ones who would be suspected are the citizens here."

"Oh." Mokona's rabbit-like ears suddenly moved downward gloomily. "What are we going to do then?"

"Let's investigate for now." Nokoru proposed, knowing Subaru might do something rash if he said they should just rest for a while.

"I'll invite you to our humble house for now." The old man said, looking relieved at the change of hearts of the visitors. "I'm the Mayor of this rundown town."

"I see." Nokoru said before he ushered Subaru, who was still carrying Kamui tightly, and Fuuma, who was still pissed, tofollow the old man too. Mokona readily hopped on the blonde's shoulder and they all followed the Mayor to his house.

"Please forgive us lads that we can only offer such poor quality tea." The old man said as he put the tea on the table. Nokoru and Fuuma took their own cup and Mokona too hopped on the table delightedly and took his cup. Subaru let Kamui's head rest on his chest and held with one arm so he could take the cup with his other hand. Kamui's hair brushed the older male's neck and it was slightly tickling Subaru.

"You can let him rest here, lad." The old man pointed another couch. Subaru looked at the man suspiciously first before he decided the mayor was sincere. He gently and carefully put Kamui on the couch. He brushed a strand of hair off Kamui's face before he went back to his seat.

"I wonder when The Kamui will wake up." Mokona said as he sipped his tea. He glanced at Kamui's sleeping form before he sighed. "Was his wish to disappear very strong that he refuses to wake up even though there's already a piece of his soul back?"

"I don't think that's the case." Fuuma was the one who answered, which made Nokoru and Mokona exchange glances. "Maybe the act of putting back a piece of soul in a lifeless body is just very exhausting, if not totally impossible for normal people."

Mokona and Nokoru nodded in agreement. "But he sure is beautiful, isn't he? Ah, I want to see his beautiful amethyst eyes again." Nokoru said in an amused voice.

"I bet he'll wake up if we try to shake him or something." Fuuma said as he too drank his tea. Subaru had no time listening to their conversation as he tried to think of something that would enable him to somehow get inside Seireitei.

"By the way, why do you keep on calling him 'The Kamui', Mokona-san? Shouldn't just calling him Kamui-san or Kamui-sama alright?" Nokoru asked the question that had been bugging him ever since they all met. "Is his power really that great?"

"The Kamui is The Kamui! Just like Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona answered, which didn't really explain anything. "And the depth and vastness of his power scares even Yuuko to the fact she gave you people compensation discount just so his soul would be back in one piece inside him."

"You mean when he actually took my ring, that was already discounted?" Fuuma blurted out. "Well, isn't she really a bitch!?"

"Stop that." Nokoru said calmly. "After all, she gave us a choice, remember? But you agreed."

"That's right." Mokona said. "So, now, what are we going to do, Nokoru?"

"That's right. We need to find a way to get inside the palace without endangering the citizens." Nokoru mused. He looked at Subaru. The latter's mismatched eyes were closed, but they all knew he was awake. _"I don't think he'll ever sleep so soundly while Kamui is unprotected, or so he thought. He still doesn't trust us, his companions."_

"How about this Sunday, lads? That's two days from now." The mayor said. He was clearly listening to their conversation even though there were some things he just couldn't understand. "There will be a celebration in Seireitei, the six hundredth year anniversary of King Ashura and Queen Yasha's wedding, lads."

"Those names sound just like the dynasty in my country." Fuuma mumbled.

"Six Hundredth Year Wedding anniversary?!" Nokoru was very surprised.

Subaru was the only one who received the news calmly. He might also celebrate his sixth hundredth birthday if he wouldn't love anyone. Such was the power of the Sakurazukamori. He was basically immortal, except that there was one person who could hurt or even kill him. And that person was currently Seishirou, who was already dead. It meant that the only person who could kill him was the sole person he loved deeply. But his heart had long died together with his former lover so he didn't think anyone would have a chance of killing him now.

"What's wrong with it, lads?" The old man looked surprised at the question. "Royalties live longer than us. And I'm already reaching four hundred this year, just so you know, lads."

Even Fuuma's eyes widened. Sure, the man was old. But not so old as what he had just said. He looked mostly in his late seventies or eighties. Mokona whistled in amazement, which made the old man chuckled.

"Why do you want to go to Seireitei, by the way?" He asked kindly. "If you want to hurt someone there, I might have to stop you, lads."

"Don't worry, old man." Mokona said, imitating the old man's accent. "We lads will not do something as simple as that." The old man blinked.

"We just want to get something that is rightfully ours. We also hope there will be no bloodshed over _that_." Nokoru interrupted before Mokona could say anything that would make them look like thieves. _"Like, 'we actually want to steal the feather from Seireitei's possession'… and such."_

"Where do criminals go, by the way?" Subaru asked seriously, which made Nokoru think that the guy was really planning something.

The old man looked uncomfortable at the question. But he answered nevertheless. "I-In Seireitei… Many offenses have execution as punishment, by the way. So, lad, if you think you can go inside Seireitei freely, then you're gravely mistaken."

Subaru smirked, which made even his companions shiver. "Don't worry about me being killed."

"Ah, that's right." Mokona flicked his thumb and middle finger, making a sound. "You're the Sakurazukamori! Of course!"

"What's a Sakurazukamori?" Fuuma asked suspiciously. He could see confidence in Subaru's mismatched eyes when he said not to worry about him dying. Mokona turned quiet, which was a little out of his character, so Fuuma turned to Subaru instead. "Oy, I'm asking here."

"It's not something guy from a different dimension will understand even if I try to explain." Subaru merely said before he closed his eyes again. The old man sighed before he left them in the living room. "All you need to do is think of the event this Sunday. I'll take care of my own." Subaru added after a while.

"Are you planning to do something?" Nokoru asked, even though he knew Subaru wouldn't ask something like that just because he's curious. When Subaru didn't answer, the blonde continued. "It might offend you, but I think the old man is right. You shouldn't rush things, Subaru-san. Do you think those people would just let the rest of us live if you are to do something disturbing? Think about Kamui-san's situation more."

Subaru's cold glare when he opened his eyes was different from his normal glare, which made Nokoru stop talking for a while. His mismatched crimson and emerald eyes looked like they were glowing from behind his fringes.

"It's the Sakurazukamori…" Mokona mumbled.

"You mean he's not Subaru-san?" Nokoru whispered, though they knew Subaru could hear them.

"Oy, do you really want to disturb your sleeping prince by sending waves of killing aura everywhere?" Fuuma asked in annoyance. "What do you think will happen if he sees you like that?"

That somehow made Subaru's deadly glare subsided, though his eyes remained cold and merciless. After a while, he spoke in a very quiet voice. "He's not my prince. We don't have any connection anymore."

"Yuuko-san said that bonds cannot be severed so easily." Mokona voiced. "I think that's the same for the former Dragon of Heaven and his Leader. Even though you became one of the Seven Angels, your bond with Kamui will never be–"

"Shut up!" Subaru stood up from his seat. "Don't talk about my life as if you know me! I betrayed Kamui! I betrayed every one of them! I killed them all! Kamui hates me more than anyone now!"

"Mokona doesn't think that's the case…" Mokona mumbled, ears drooping. Despite his looks, he was still sensitive, especially when someone shouted angrily at him.

Subaru cupped his forehead with his right hand, hiding his eyes and almost crushing his skull. _He lost it… He really lost it just now… _"Sorry." He voiced quietly before he left the living room and also the house.

"I didn't think he'll leave Kamui-san just like that." Nokoru said quietly as he glanced at Kamui's sleeping form again. "And Mokona-san, can you please tell us what happened between those two?"

"I don't think I can…" Mokona mumbled, still hurt about Subaru's outburst earlier. "The only ones who could tell their story are those that are involved…" His eyes started to get watery.

"Don't mind him too much." Nokoru patted Mokona's head. "It's my fault that he lost his temper just now, not yours." He took Mokona and placed the furry animal on his lap.

"I know he didn't mean it." Mokona said as he tried to recover his usual cheerful self. "He even said sorry…"

"Can you at least give us a hint if there's a landmine or not?" Fuuma asked in annoyance, again. "And can you stop your active participation in stepping on it?"

"Mokona didn't mean anything wrong! Those are Yuuko-san's words!" Mokona said in defense. "It's just that… Subaru and Kamui's past have been full of deadly thorns… intertwining them and making them unable to get away from one another… Kamui wanted to get away from Subaru too, just as Subaru wants to get away from him, even now… But life isn't that easy…"

"Can you explain in a way that will make your metaphor more useful?" Fuuma asked again, earning a smile from Nokoru. From what the blonde observed, Fuuma didn't like anything that did not concern him. But he just had to question Mokona about Kamui and Subaru's past.

Mokona thought for a while. "Let me make it simple. The Kamui, because of the burden of bearing his name, walks on a path full of thorns, alone and afraid. He keeps on getting hurt but he still keeps on walking in hope that he will find a companion, to at least ease his fears. Subaru also walks on a path full of thorns, alone and hurting. The isolation and solitude makes him feel sad but it also gives him courage."

"There's no difference from earlier!" Fuuma grabbed Mokona's head but Nokoru hit his hand.

"Don't interrupt him!" He hissed. "Continue, Mokona-san."

Mokona looked at Fuuma with a triumphant smile. He was clearly able to get back on his feet after the earlier incident. "Where did Mokona stop? Oh, yeah. And then they saw each other walking in that thorny path and both have the kindness of helping each other from their pain. The Kamui was also glad he was not alone anymore, and Subaru too. But since they walk on the same path now, the thorns had doubled and the pain and agony too had doubled. They wanted to get away from one another now because they couldn't take the pain. But their thorned paths have somehow managed to intertwine, making them inseparable. They both lived in agony, and more pain. In the end, Subaru couldn't handle it and ran away. Thus, he betrayed The Kamui. The Kamui, having his companion betrayed him, felt so lost and afraid again. He became weaker and weaker, and in the end, he couldn't take the pain anymore."

"And he wished to just disappear… to make his pain go away?" Nokoru asked quietly, and Mokona nodded.

"Of course, Mokona only explained it in quite simple terms." Mokona said with a serious face. "There too much external factor between those two. Seishirou and Fuuma are one of those…"

"Who told you you're explanation is simple? And who's this Fuuma, by the way?" Fuuma asked. He wanted to ask that question for a while now.

"Seishirou was Subaru's lover. And Fuuma was Kamui's best friend." Mokona said, making Fuuma and Nokoru nod.

"Both in past tense, huh…" Nokoru said.

"Of course." Mokona said, not realizing he was already explaining everything. "Fuuma was killed by Kamui and Seishirou was killed by Subaru. And those two people's death broke them too deeply, to the point that they wanted nothing but to die. But Subaru has become the Sakurazukamori and thus he cannot die. Kamui didn't have the courage to kill himself until recently."

Both Nokoru and Fuuma were stunned. Those two killed both of the ones they loved. _For what reason? _Nokoru couldn't imagine himself killing his own lover, even if it was the world's end.Fuuma also couldn't imagine killing someone like his prince, even if it was his prince's wish. They both couldn't understand it at all. And if Kamui and Subaru would be destroyed by doing such a thing as that, then why did they do it in the first place? What was so important for them than the ones they loved that those people had to be killed?

"Somehow, even if you explained it to us, I am more lost regarding their situation than earlier." Nokoru said while wearing an apologetic smile.

"Tch. That's what I meant by you not explaining things clearer." Fuuma voiced. "But all we have to do now is to take the brat's soul back, right?"

"Yup, and a piece of it is in Seireitei." Mokona said.

"So that's how it is…" The old man said. Both Nokoru and Fuuma's eyes widened. They didn't even realize the old man's presence behind them. They didn't even sense him approached.

"_I don't know about the blonde and the animal. But for me, a Lord Protector, to not realize there is someone behind me is unheard of!" _Fuuma shouted inside his mind, punishing his lack of concentration.

"_I don't know about Fuuma-san, but for me to let someone go behind me unnoticed is unheard of!" _Nokoru wanted to punish himself right now. Even if that was an old man, he was still too careless! _No, this person isn't an ordinary old man. That much is certain._

"Oh, did I surprise you? Sorry about that." The old man chuckled. "But rest assured. There are more surprises than this."

Nokoru and Fuuma's eyes widened even more when they started to lose their balance and feel dizzy. The last thing they saw before their knees gave out was the old man's wide and confident smile.

But since they weren't ordinary people, they still managed to get their bearing. Nokoru immediately grabbed the already unconscious Mokona and Fuuma tried his best to carry Kamui before they ran for it. Their movements were too slow and their visions were turning from blurred to black. They were almost out of the house and thought that they would be able to escape, until they saw at least a dozen men in military uniform and also at least a dozen rifles pointed at them.

Nokoru lost his balance and fell on the ground, which was thankfully soft because of some grasses. Fuuma looked back to help him and regretted it as he too lost his fragile balance and fell. But he was at least able to shift his falling position so as not to fall directly on Kamui.

"Subaru… san…" Nokoru mumbled before he totally lost consciousness.

"The… tea…" Fuuma managed to say before everything around him went black. But his hold on Kamui remained firm and unwavering.

"Sorry, about that, Souma-sama." The old man apologized to a beautiful female with neck-length hair. She was behind the armed men and her uniform too was different from the rest of them. After all, she was the sole general of the Palace's army.

"They're a bit tougher than you thought, aren't they?" Souma said with a smug grin. "But with this, the outsider threat to our country has been dealt with. But are you sure they said they wanted to make some mischief during the Wedding Anniversary?"

"Yes, I heard them talking about it earlier. They were planning on doing something that could make them go inside Seireitei." The old man looked hopeful.

"Thank you for always reporting disturbing activities outside Seireitei." Souma gave him a small bag containing gold as payment for his loyalty and the man looked really happy.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: I'm still not awake? How many chapters has it been? Even that fur ball Mokona has more lines than me! Are you really bullying me now, Ren?

Ren-sama: Yeah, I guess.

Subaru: Oy, what happened to me? You didn't say what happened to me. And what's with my attitude back there? Why did I apologize to a fur ball?

Ren-sama: So that's what you're angry about?

Subaru: And where's that fur ball? He told the others about Kamui and I. I'll definitely feed him to the tree!

Ren-sama: Saa… And I thought you have no responsibility to the tree anymore?

Kamui: Oy, why am I still asleep? Didn't I already receive one feather? Can I just wake up? I got kidnap without any fight, you know!

Host: Ren-san, can you please sign these documents? And these too, they want some autographs… And…

Subaru: Oy, you haven't answered my questions yet.

Ren-sama: Shut up, all of you. I can't concentrate. Or do you want me to do anything I want next chapter? Do you people want me to make Subaru #$%& Kamui and * &!^% Kamui?!

All: (*silence*)

Subaru and Kamui: (*blush*)

Ren-sama: (*grins*) Good. Everyone, please R&R.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_Kamui looked at him with those amethyst charming eyes of his, full of warmth and kindness, and he felt a sword rest over his right shoulder. "Fuuma Monou, from now on, you will offer me your whole life, your whole body, and your soul. You will live for me, and no one but me."_

"_I bow before you and pledge my loyalty to you and only you, my prince, forever." He bowed on both knees and kissed the tip his prince's feet under the royal robe. "I will be yours forever."_

_Kamui seemed satisfied and he smiled as he sheathed the royal sword. "I trust in your eternal promise and loyalty." He used two pale slender fingers to pull Fuuma from the chin and raise his head. The older male closed his eyes as a chaste kiss fell on his lips. _

Fuuma woke up feeling totally out of it. He grunted when he felt that his hands were tied behind him. He sat with difficulty and saw Nokoru sitting not far from him.

"So you're awake. It took you so long. It's already dark outside, you know." Nokoru greeted with a smile. He glanced at the sole window in the cell, which showed starless sky with two huge full moons.

"Where are we?" Fuuma asked in annoyance, but his voice also had a hint of slight panic. "And why are you so relaxed?!"

Nokoru laughed. "Because I'm used to being kidnapped, being the Leader of my company and all." He stopped laughing but only slightly. "I think we're in some dungeon prison. This cement wall is really thick. There's only one small window and a huge metal door. It's kind of creepy."

Fuuma merely snorted at that comment. He could see the view even without Nokoru voicing them anyway. He looked around and saw that there were only the two of them. "Oy, forget about the fur ball, but where's the brat?!"

Nokoru shrugged. "I don't know. I woke up with only the two of us here. Maybe they are both being held captive in another cell."

"I don't think they will execute someone unconscious… but then again, this _is_ a different dimension than the one where I came from so I'm not sure." Fuuma mumbled, but still enough for Nokoru to hear. They both just hoped that Kamui and Mokona were alright. "And where's that damn S-Saru.. Sakuraku… Tch. Where's that guy?"

"The Sakurazukamori?" Nokoru asked in amusement and he grinned as Fuuma scowled.

"Whatever, where is he?" Fuuma asked. "I don't think he was captured too. But I'm not really sure… he didn't come back after all."

"Maybe he too lost consciousness the moment he went outside for some fresh air." Nokoru answered as a guess. "I just hope he will be able to at least rescue Kamui-san and Mokona-san."

"What about us, huh?" Fuuma asked. "Do you want us to get executed here? I refuse to die before I get back to my own dimension!"

"I didn't say we'll let ourselves perish here." Nokoru smiled with too much confidence that it somehow made Fuuma stop worrying, for now. "You see, I have a plan."

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

He woke feeling totally dizzy and his vision was muddled. He found himself in a deserted rooftop of some house he couldn't recognize. The moon was already showing its silent elegance and he knew he was out for at least half a day. He blinked, thinking he was double-seeing things, but then after a while, he knew that there were really two full moons. _Weird. _He was puzzled at first, but then he remembered what happened before everything was swallowed by total darkness.

_He immediately dashed out of the house, feeling totally miserable. The fur ball just had to say all of those things in front of those two strangers. He lost his temper too, something he didn't think would still happen. At least he thought not because his heart was already dead, and that he didn't care about anything anymore. But because it concerned Kamui, of course, he couldn't help but lose it._

_He immediately jumped from house to house and tree to tree in swift and deliberate movements. His mind was so lost as to what happened and he let his instincts take control of his body. When he came to it, he was already in this rooftop. He immediately cursed loudly when he remembered he left Kamui all alone in that house. _

_He immediately turned around was about to trace his way back when he suddenly felt like he was losing his balance. He stopped for a while and tried to think of something that could have caused the sudden fatigue-like feeling in his gut. When he thought that his balance was returning, he suddenly found his vision going totally black. He blinked once or twice, but it had no effect at all. The dizziness started to get worse and soon he found himself falling to the concrete flooring of the rooftop. And everything went dark._

Subaru immediately traced his way back through instincts alone and immediately knew something was wrong when he saw that the old man's house had no light whatsoever. He also couldn't feel much presence except of that old man. He couldn't feel Kamui's presence at all and it was making him panic silently. He gritted his teeth when he tried to get close.

Being the Sakurazukamori gave him too much experience on spying, intruding inside someone else's house unnoticed, and killing someone, also unnoticed. It seemed as if he was melting in the darkness when he entered the unlit house. He was able to walk into the living room without any notice from the old man who was currently sitting on the couch where Kamui lay earlier.

On the table still were the cups that he and his companions drank their tea from. He swiftly moved towards where the old man was without noise and was able to place a knife in front of the old man's throat just as quietly.

"Where are my companions?" Subaru asked quietly but deadly, implying that any wrong movement and the old man would fail to see the next sunrise. The only thing that was making him keep from turning totally into Sakurazukamori mode this whole year was Kamui. Kamui was the sole person that kept his sanity intact, and also the sole person that reminded him that some part of him was still human. _He still had guilt towards Kamui. _And if something ever happened to his sanity because of Kamui's absence, he would surely lose it and he'd definitely kill endlessly without any form of remorse or self-will. He would become nothing, not even an assassin, but a mindless _murderer_…

The old man looked bewildered about the voice. He didn't even realize that a knife was already placed just a centimeter from his throat until he felt its killing intent. "L-Lad, wha–, I-I… They are already in Seireitei. They said earlier that they wanted to sneak before Sunday after all… And–"

"Liar." Subaru hissed. He was just scolded by Nokoru about something like that, so he knew the guy wouldn't do something so rash. That blonde's pride wouldn't allow himself to act like that after being blown away by Subaru's temper. He would definitely stick to his words. And with that, there could be only one explanation about everything.

"If everything ever happens to Kamui, I'll kill every last one of you." He whispered beside the old man's ear before he disappeared, leaving a feint cut on the mayor's throat. The knife was also left stabbed half-way on the headrest of the couch. The old man could still feel himself tremble from utter fear. He felt his cold sweats trickle down his forehead and body. He knew those words were not threat, but fact that would happen in the near future if the lad didn't get his lover back in one piece. Or so the old man thought that Kamui could only be Subaru's lover because of his attitude towards the boy.

He didn't care much if he were to be killed mercilessly by a guy like that. But he had sons and daughters, and also grandsons and granddaughters. He didn't want them to get hurt in any way just because of some guy's lover. And with that, he somehow knew what he had to do.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Nokoru and Fuuma both strained their ears just to hear what the guards outside were talking about.

"_I heard the prince will also be married tomorrow, at the Wedding Anniversary of the King and the Queen."_

"_Man, and that princess they found was really beautiful no matter what angle you look at."_

"_Ah, and these two prisoners that they caught yesterday will be executed in that day too, as a ritual to prevent bad luck from befalling the newly-weds."_

"_Hah, what foolish lads. They actually thought they could create some mischief during the Holy Celebration?"_

"_Well, that's outsiders for you. I bet they came from Hueco Mundo or in Kamakura Town."_

"_Ah, I want to go to the celebration too…"_

"_It's tomorrow night so we can't go. We have our own duties to fulfill during that hour."_

"_You're right." _

"Did you hear that?" Nokoru asked Fuuma quietly.

"Of course." Fuuma said, still thinking about the conversation. "And what do they mean by two prisoners? If that's true, then where're the brat and the fur ball?"

Nokoru bit his lower lip. "If we don't know where they are, we can't execute this plan…"

"Tch, so annoying." Fuuma muttered. "We can just do it and search for them later."

"But, Fuuma-san…" Nokoru said in uncertainty. "But if the plan fails, then we will have no chance of finding Kamui-san and Mokona-san at all… We at least need to know where they are…"

"I'm sure that guy will do something about it." Fuuma said with certain confidence which made Nokoru smile. _So Fuuma trusts Subaru-san after all… _"What?"

"Nothing." The blonde kept his cool smile, just like always, and knew no one would be able to read him at all.

"And according to that conversation, it's a possibility that we were out for at least a whole 24-hour period." Fuuma said. "And that means we will have to execute the plan tomorrow. And don't let yourself get deceived by any kind of drink again."

Nokoru chuckled. "Sure, you too."

"Believe me, I refuse to die until I see my prince again." Fuuma answered with a smug smirk. Nokoru chuckled again.

The day came much quicker than Fuuma and Nokoru thought. They felt like they had just slept for at least three or fours hours and the guards were already picking them up for the execution.

"No wonder they can be as old as they want." Fuuma muttered as they were hurled on their feet and forced to walk as briskly as the guards wanted.

"I bet they call us lads but I am much older than that king of theirs." Nokoru said with a smile.

"Stop talking, you two!" One of the guards shouted at them just as they were shoved forward. Both muttered curses under their breaths. And before they could even react any further, they were out of the dungeon and into the open, where millions and millions of people were gathered to watch them get killed.

The arena looked like some old stadium where gladiators fight to the death in the Roman times. It had no roof and they could see some fireworks from a distance.

"Is this the time to execute our plan?" Fuuma asked as they were shoved in the middle of the stadium, where a small platform was prepared and two masked axe-men were waiting. The two of them were both made to kneel in front of two blocks of stone where they would be beheaded.

"I think they want to behead us." Nokoru said in an amused tone. "The plan will fail if we–"

He wasn't able to finish his sentence when the whole stadium was filled with an awed uproar. They looked up and saw that millions and millions of tiny pink petals from some flower were springing down from the sky.

"Is that supposed to be part of the show?" Fuuma asked sarcastically. "What a beautiful scene to see before losing my head."

"They are panicking." Nokoru said, trying to see what was happening to the spectators more clearly. "I don't know why. Those are just petals."

Fuuma strained his eyes to see what was happening. His eyes were far sharper than Nokoru's and he could clearly what was happening to the people that were touched by the petals. "Those petals are deadly. They cut deeper than they look."

"You can see that clearly? Wow…" Nokoru said in amusement. It felt like they were the spectators as the people tried to scramble for their lives, running and stampeding into other people without any care.

"And that's one of the Sakurazukamori's wonders." A voice behind them made them both turn around.

"Mokona-san!""Fur ball!" Fuuma and Nokoru voiced at the same time.

"That's Subaru-san's power?" Nokoru asked in wonder. "It's so beautiful and deadly."

"That's just the peak of his power, lads." Mokona said like he was bragging about his son.

"Don't copy that annoying accent." Fuuma said in annoyance. "And why are you here? Weren't you captured?"

"Yup, the old man helped me." Mokona answered, still showing a smug attitude.

"What? That old man who sold us?!" Fuuma exclaimed in fury.

"Please talk later, let us free." Nokoru said in a hurry. He could see that the two huge guys wearing masks and carrying deadly axes were approaching fast.

Mokona immediately bit the chains binding Fuuma and Nokoru's hands and it broke into tiny pieces, immediately freeing them, which made the two males gape at him. "And that, lads, is one of Mokona's 109 Secret Abilities!"

Fuuma was able to hit the first male but it looked like nothing happened. It seemed they were wearing some armor-like clothings which made them invincible from any physical attacks.

"How about mental attacks then?" Subaru voiced behind them. His voice was too icy and devoid of any emotion that they involuntarily shivered. Just as Fuuma and Nokoru turned to face him, the two huge males with mask started screaming and scratching their faces.

Subaru's two and a half companions watched with wide eyes as the two males started to throw up blood and even then they didn't cease from scratching not only their faces now but their whole bodies. They continued to scream at the top of their voices until they were cringing on the ground, and after some more seconds, they were dead.

"Y-You killed them… without even touching them…" Fuuma said in utter disbelief. He felt half amazed and half panicked. Nokoru was glad that Subaru was on their side, or at least it looked like it.

"The Sakurazukamori is a master of illusions." Mokona said, shaking his head as he looked at the two men on the ground. "People with weak hearts would die immediately. So far, only The Kamui has managed to get out of it with much ease."

"So you used illusion to kill them…" Nokoru said. He was about to say that Subaru didn't have to go as far as to kill them, until he saw Subaru's expression.

Mokona hopped to Nokoru's shoulder and whispered. "Mokona don't think Nokoru should say anything right now. He has been like that ever since I saw him last night…"

Subaru started walking away without any word to them. Fuuma turned to Mokona and asked in a serious expression, "Can you explain more?"

"The old man was threatened by The Sakurazukamori so he asked the guards if The Kamui would be let out, but they only let Mokona out, saying that there is no such kid like that inside Seireitei."Mokona said. "In the end, the old man only managed to bring Mokona back to Subaru. He didn't look too merciful and the old man immediately said that he will definitely find The Kamui."

"You mean he was like that because of Kamui-san's absence." Nokoru said as they too followed behind Subaru.

"Yes, Mokona had to keep quiet the whole time to keep from getting killed by the Sakurazukamori." Mokona said. "He also didn't give any mercy to the guards earlier. He killed them all. He also killed the people that tried to arrest him last night. He was lenient to the spectators… but he killed the two men with masks…"

"He's agitated because of the brat's absence that he can't control his temper and his instinct to kill." Fuuma said quietly. "If this continues, he will kill even more. Perhaps, he will kill the three of us too. We need to find the brat as soon as possible."

"How did you know that?" Mokona asked.

"Because he's trembling uncontrollably. And I know that it's not from fear of killing people." Fuuma answered. "He's losing it."

"_Still as observant as ever." _Nokoru thought with a sigh and a small smile.

They managed to get out of the stadium and were met by the old man outside. Subaru simply passed by him and Fuuma immediately gave him a punch on the face.

"_And still as short-tempered as ever." _Nokoru sighed.

The old man gave Fuuma a small glare before he turned to follow Subaru. "Wait! Wait, lad! I think I know where the small lad is." That statement made Subaru stop. He turned to the old man and the latter immediately took a step back. His cold and deadly mismatched eyes were glowing again.

"Where is he?" He asked quietly, not even blinking as he stared at the old man. The latter felt like Subaru was trying to figure out how to kill him in case he was lying again.

"He's to be wed to the prince! He's going to be the princess of Soul Society." The old man immediately answered. He wasn't lying so he didn't need to be so afraid.

Subaru's gaze turned even colder. "Where is he?" He repeated just as quietly. Nokoru and Fuuma watched silently from behind.

The old man gulped. "T-The Main Square… I think…"

The Main Square was filled with so many people watching beautiful fireworks. The fireworks were really beautiful, except that the people watched them in the middle of the day.

"Are they idiots or something?" Fuuma asked.

"Subaru-san, where are you going?" Nokoru called when he saw that Subaru didn't care about bumping into the crowd. He kept on walking and his companions had to sigh and follow him.

"I-I have nothing to do with this…" The old man muttered and he immediately took a different path than the outsiders.

They looked up and saw that from a balcony sat two beautiful males, or was one of them actually female? The latter looked so androgynous that he could pass as both genders. They knew the one who was more masculine was the King Yasha. And the one with the androgynous feature was supposedly Queen Ashura.

"I wonder where Kamui-san is…" Nokoru mumbled without any thought. They were all watching the Celebration of the 600th Wedding Anniversary of the Royal couple.

"He's there." Subaru voiced quietly, still looking at the balcony. He could see the prince waving his hand to the people and wearing a delighted smile.

"Ah, that's The Kamui!" Mokona voiced as he pointed at the chair where a beautiful person wearing skin-tight white linen and golden bangles on neck, hands and foot, similar to what Queen Ashura was wearing.

"He's still sleeping at a time like this!?" Fuuma couldn't help but exclaim.

And in just a split second, the whole Main Square was filled with sakura petals raining down in idleness. The million pieces of tiny petals looked so beautiful it left everyone deep in awe. The noise and cheers subsided as everyone turned their heads upward, watching the falling beauties.

"S-Subaru-san! You don't have to–!" Nokoru was about to say that the guy didn't have to kill everyone, but he stopped when he felt the petals brushed his cheeks. It's _soft. _And it didn't look too deadly, except for the fact that almost everyone in the Square was losing their balance and yawning. Some were already on the ground, snoring like they were in their own bedrooms.

"Is it illusion?" Fuuma asked as he watched the people from all around them slowly fall on the ground and sleep.

"Mokona thinks it's a combination of both his power to use the Sakura petals and the power of illusion." Mokona answered. He was still on Nokoru's shoulder. "It seems he has calmed down a bit because he saw that The Kamui is alright."

Subaru watched as Kamui's chest heaved and fell. He was sleeping and he didn't look hurt in any way. That made him lost all the agitations that had started to build up inside him.

"You people, what mischief are you performing as to create such commotion as this?" Yasha asked, clearly his eyes were on their lot. His demeanor was both sharp and dazzling in its strength.

"Give Kamui back to me." Subaru wasn't intimidated at all, which said a lot of things.

"Huh? You mean Princess?" The prince asked in a childish voice. "I am Ryuu, the prince, and this is my princess! Who do you think you are to ask me such a thing? Is she your lover or something?"

Subaru didn't answer. He surely didn't have any right over Kamui. He was neither Kamui's lover nor subordinate. _He was nothing in Kamui's life… _"I…" Nokoru and Fuuma waited for him to say, but he didn't.

"The Sakurazukamori is the person The Kamui loves with all his heart, even if they are not lovers." It was Mokona who voiced everything, which made Subaru's eyes widen. Fuuma and Nokoru looked just as surprised as him. "Don't you think you're being a little too blind there, young prince? The Kamui is a male."

Ryuu's eyes widened in surprise. "S-So what? And do you have any proof?"

"Huh? Is that kid blind or something?" Fuuma asked.

"Give him back to me." Subaru repeated.

Ryuu was about to speak again but Yasha stopped his son. "Lad, if you want this person, what can you give us in return?"

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: And I'm still asleep.

Ren-sama: Sorry, next chapter, I promise, you'll be awake again.

Subaru: (*mumble, mumble up in a tree*) What will I give in return..? I don't have anything… What I should I do..?

Host: Ah, I've invited some friends here, Ren-san.

Ren-sama: Yuuko? And Black Mokona? And Host-san, is this your room to invite other people on your own?

Yuuko: Don't be too stingy! Let's drink!

Mokona: (*Laughed out loud*) What's with this dingy room?

Yuuko: Mokona, you shouldn't say such things out loud! You'll embarrass the owner!

Ren-sama: (*dark aura coming out*)

Kamui: When will I finally see Subaru's face..? And I don't want to be married to that Ryuu, even if he's a prince…

Host: Uh, Ren-san, do you want me to make them get out now? So you can have a peaceful sleep for once?

Mokona: (*laughed out loud again*) That joke was too funny Yuuko-san!

Yuuko: (*hiccup, hiccup*) Alright, let's drink all out tonight! Ren-kun, please give me more sake!

Ren-sama: GET OUT OF MY PLACE! (Everyone was shoved out of the room.) Finally, some peace and quiet…

Subaru: What kind of idiot would fall for such a stupid trick as a sleeping pill in a tea? The author surely didn't factor in my real abilities–

Ren-sama: I'm THE AUTHOR so I get to do what I want! (*pant, pant*) Everyone, good night… I mean, R&R.

.

.

Again, everyone. Sorry for the disappointment about your requests. Next chapter will the chapter that will break Subaru's heart as well as yours. But please don't kill me for it! T_T I promise that I will make it better in the future! Really!


	9. Chapter 9

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Once again, I thank you all for the wonderful and most amazing support! But I have to apologize soon, because this chapter will most likely break your hearts. But don't worry, it broke my heart too. T_T**

**Well, here it goes. I just hope you won't kill me for this.**

**.**

**Chapter 9**

"I can give you your life in return. I won't kill you if you give him to me." Subaru looked at the King with coldness that could freeze everybody else, except Yasha.

The King smirked. "You want to kill me that much, lad?"

"Yasha!" Ashura looked at Yasha with concern before he looked at Subaru. He didn't want his husband to do anything rash.

"Don't worry." He kissed Ashura's forehead. "If this princess is that lad's lover, then we mustn't get them forcefully separated, right? It's unfair that we live in bliss while these people suffer."

"B-But father!" Ryuu complained. "This person is to be my wife!"

"But he doesn't even know he will be one." Yasha said and Ryuu became totally grumpy. He then turned to Subaru. "So, how about it, lad? I'll invite you to our palace. If you can come out in one piece, then you can have your lover back." He then turned to Nokoru and Fuuma. "Those two must not go with you, by the way." Subaru's glare merely worsened, but other than that, he didn't really have any complain.

"Are you sure about this?" Ashura asked his husband again. "What if he's not what we are looking–"

"If he's just a mere coward, then he's not worth it to be at The Kamui's side." Yasha said, which made Subaru's eyebrows creased. Surely the King heard that Mokona called Kamui like that, but for Yasha to call Kamui in the same way without understanding its meaning was a bit… _Or did he actually know who Kamui was?_

"Oy, you two and a half." Ryuu called Nokoru, Fuuma, and Mokona's attention. "Don't you dare lay a hand on our people. If you do that, we'll make sure your princess and your friend The Sakurazukamori is dead. Or not?" He then chuckled at the pun he made from the Sakurazukamori's power.

"You can enter from anywhere you want to get to your princess." Yasha said with a confident smile. "But please don't get too arrogant, Master of Illusions, Sakurazukamori. I will not be lenient at all to you. You killed many of my citizens after all."

Subaru gritted his teeth. _They knew who he was after all. _The royalties exited the balcony and everything went quiet, except for the annoying snores of the sleeping people.

Subaru was about to walk away without any word when Mokona followed him. "What do you want?" He asked quietly.

"Yasha-ou said that only Fuuma and Nokoru can't come. It means Mokona can come with you inside." Mokona hopped on Subaru's shoulder, which was a first. Both Fuuma and Nokoru thought that the guy would immediately grab Mokona's head and throw him away, but Subaru didn't.

"I think that'll be better than you walking in there all alone." Nokoru added from behind Subaru. _After all, Mokona was able to stay with the Sakurazukamori all night without getting killed. _Nokoru didn't think that neither he nor Fuuma could do that with a totally short-tempered Subaru.

Subaru didn't answer but he didn't throw Mokona either. Mokona sat comfortably on his shoulder as he walked inside one of the gates to the palace.

"I don't think that guy can stay alive without that fur ball." Fuuma said after a while.

"Why do you think so?" Nokoru asked, feeling so low in comprehending the situation, but still amused enough because Fuuma just thought highly of Mokona.

"That guy gets too agitated with everything that concerns the brat. He'll definitely be played at by those royalties if he didn't keep his cool. And that fur ball can help in cooling his head." Fuuma said unconcernedly. Nokoru was about to get impressed but then Fuuma added, "If he can throw some sakura petals to the fur ball or something, then that can clear his mind."

"You–…" Nokoru sighed. "Why are you so ill-mannered towards Mokona-san?"

"Huh? Because he pretends to be cute and cuddly when he's not! And he's too arrogant. And he's that bitch's pet!" Fuuma fumed.

"So many… irrational reasons…" Nokoru said.

"Shut up." Fuuma voiced.

"And? What should we do now while waiting?" Nokoru asked.

Subaru entered the gate, expecting to see the same scenery he saw outside of it. But the moment the gate was opened, everything immediately went dark. It somehow unnerved him, merely because of the fact that he couldn't tell at all if it was illusion or not. He wasn't the type to run away from darkness but the type who easily blended with it so that wasn't his concern. His fear and unease right now was because of the fact that he knew it was the enemies' trap.

But for someone who was used to work in the dark, he immediately realized that he wasn't blending with the darkness at all. He could even see the line patterns of his black trench coat, which was so unusual it was almost alarming him.

"Subaru?" Subaru reflexively became even more alert when he heard someone called him, until he realized that he was not alone. Mokona was still on his shoulder and the furry animal sensed the Sakurazukamori's unease so Mokona tried to call him.

"What?" He asked, trying to make his voice as flat as possible even though he knew there was no point in trying to fool a fur ball.

"There are many people around us." Mokona said simply. "Can you feel them?"

Subaru's eyes widened at that. He wasn't able to feel them at all, at least not until Mokona pointed the statement out. He tried to make his eyes adjust to the darkness, in vain. He couldn't see anything except himself. He couldn't even see Mokona who was currently on his shoulder. The only thing that was making him sure that the fur ball was still there was Mokona's weight and his fluffy scent.

Subaru waited for the people to attack, readying for his defense/kill to come. But no one moved from their position. And almost immediately, everything went totally bright. Subaru involuntarily shut his eyes when the stinging light hit them. When he opened his mismatched eyes again, he was already in some magnificent masquerade ball. Everyone wore lovely dresses and beautiful masks, smiling at their acquaintances or trying to get along with newly-found friends. The whole premise was immediately filled with hushed noise that nobles were capable of. It was like he was suddenly in a different dimension than earlier.

He felt like he was dreaming, except that everything seemed so real. Once again, he failed to recognize if everything was a fake or not. He also realized that Mokona wasn't on his shoulder anymore. But something tugged at his insides, and he was now sure that _something _was what made all of these possible. _Kamui's soul was nearby… and was actively in use._

Subaru tried to feel where the presence was coming from, but once failed as dozens and dozens of old and young ladies tried to ask him to dance. He threw daggers at every last one of them without much difficulty, until a cool-looking pretty boy wearing a mask bowed in front of him and asked him to dance. Somehow, the older male knew who this pretty boy was.

"Kamui?" He called uncertainly to the boy. And the boy looked up and smiled at him.

"Want to have a dance with me?" He asked, still smiling.

Subaru creased his eyebrow. He was sure this person resembled Kamui too much, but Kamui was supposedly asleep. And he doubted the boy would ask him for a dance after what happened to them in the past. "No, I refuse." He said before he turned around. He was about to leave when the boy called him again.

"Subaru-san," the boy called. "Don't tell me you'll reject me again…"

That made Subaru turned almost a hundred eighty degrees, eyes wide and mouth gaping from shock. "K-Kamui… it's not like that… I was…" And he immediately caught himself. The boy was clearly not Kamui. And why was he so flustered? He immediately walked away.

"Subaru-san, are you going to abandon me again?" The boy, now with the voice that haunted him this whole year, asked. "Are you going to leave me alone again? I thought you want to save me..? Why do you want to leave me here..?"

"Because you're not Kamui." Subaru answered without so much as a glance. He continued walking away from the crowd, away from the boy.

"Why would you say something like that?" The masked boy asked. "Aren't we comrades who fought the same battles? No, weren't we comrades?"

"You're not Kamui!" Subaru shouted. "Because Kamui doesn't call me Subaru-san!" He walked away and he heard the boy's agonizing sobs from behind. But he didn't dare turn around. He knew that boy wasn't Kamui, so there's no need to feel any guilt. _And yet it tore him to pieces. _Kamui's voice and statements still echoed inside his head, making him unable to forget the broken sobs that he only knew too well. _Kamui…_

Once again, everything went dark. "What now?" Subaru asked.

When everything went clear, Subaru wished he didn't have to know the answer to his question earlier. It was night, a full moon. The wind blew timidly and he was facing the worst nightmare of his life. He was in front of the Sakura tree. The tree was not his though, because someone else was currently feeding it. And that's where the nightmare came from.

"Subaru?" The man called when he realized Subaru was there. The man's face relaxed and let out a smile, which was both intimidating and sexy.

Subaru immediately felt his heart skip a beat at the sound of his name being called so endearingly by this man. "Seishirou-san…"

The man's smile widened, but in a cool way. "Come here. I'm feeding the tree so it won't hurt you."

He immediately approached the man. He wanted nothing but to let this dream/nightmare last. If Seishirou was a figment of his imagination and longing right now, he hoped he wouldn't wake up. Seishirou immediately locked him in a warm and gentle embrace when he got near. Subaru wanted nothing more than to melt in this man's arms. He wanted nothing but for this dream, or even nightmare, to continue. He smelled a faint scent of cigarette from the man, and realized how he missed the former Sakurazukamori. He hungrily hugged the man back and was even surprised to find himself actually crying and trembling from both pain and happiness. He missed Seishirou so much… _He loved Seishirou so much…_

"Do you want to stay with me here?" Seishirou asked and Subaru readily agreed, until he looked at the tree and saw who the Sakurazukamori was feeding it with.

His eyes widened at the scene now forming before him. Those amethyst eyes were crying blood, looking at him with eyes of one who was betrayed for the second time. Subaru couldn't take it. The boy's slender body was tied with some deadly-looking vines that held him immobile. His insides were almost out in the open and he smelled of too much blood, much to Subaru's distaste. Not that Kamui looked too gory, but the blood was actually making his inside squirm in excitement.

"K-Kamui? W-What's happening?" Subaru tried to approach Kamui but was held by Seishirou's strong arms from behind.

Seishirou hugged him tight. "That boy is too innocent and pure. The tree wants souls like that once in a while. Watch him together with me. It will be enjoyable." Seishirou kissed his nape, which made Subaru shudder in delight. "Stay with me… forever…"

Subaru closed his eyes as he gritted his teeth. He knew he would regret doing this, forever. He loved Seishirou, he really did. But he couldn't live knowing he betrayed Kamui once again. _He couldn't be happy with Seishirou if he knew Kamui's life was lost because of his selfishness… _"I'm sorry, Seishirou-san… I can't."

He immediately pushed Seishirou from behind him and turned around to face the older male. "I wish this is true. I really do… I miss you so much, Seishirou-san… I love you so much, Seishirou-san…" He closed his eyes as he let the petals from inside him eat the illusion that was Seishirou. The man was dead. Maybe he was somehow unstable in his personality and identity, but he was not dumb nor was he an ignorant child. _Seishirou was dead… The former Sakurazukamori died at his own hands… Seishirou was killed by no one but him… _When he opened his pained eyes again, he knew that somewhere inside he wished that Seishirou was still there. But the man was nowhere now. And as he turned to face Kamui, he saw that the boy had died a second time, by his hands too…

"Kamui…" He knew the tree would listen to him if he wished it. And the Sakura immediately let the boy free, enabling Subaru to catch him before he fell to the ground. "I'm sorry… I'm so weak… I'm sorry…"

Kamui merely looked at him with pained expression. "It's alright…" He voiced weakly. "Because I love you… Subaru…"

Subaru closed his eyes again, feeling the gut-wrenching guilt. He just had to say those words to a non-existent Seishirou and purposefully hurt Kamui in the process. He hated himself so much. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't be." Kamui said just as weakly. "I chose to love you… even though I knew my feeling will never be reciprocated… Not even when we are to be reborn again… I'm sure you'll still love Seishirou-san… Because you're feelings does not waver. And I love you because of that…"

Subaru was about to apologize again, but Kamui's body already glowed brightly. In the process, Subaru was still in so much pain and shock that when he blinked, Kamui had already transformed into a small, glowing feather. He took it with gloved but gentle hands and his eyes widened when he recognize the stripes. _Kamui's soul…_

He couldn't help but smile painfully as he brought the feather to his lips and lightly kissed it. "I'm not worthy of your affection, Kamui… I'm the unlovable Sakurazukamori…" He stood up, not realizing he was kneeling, and gently put the feather in his trench coat's pocket. "Be good for now. I'll definitely find your body…" And with that, everything went dark again. But Subaru was not confused anymore. He knew what he had to do. _Kamui…_

He waited for everything to become bright once more, but it never did. It was somehow unsettling, but he still didn't mind. _After all, he was not alone. Kamui's soul was with him. _He walked and walked and continued walking for a while, but still nothing. There was no one beside him. Not even the fur ball was there. But that was the least of his concern when he heard a familiar cry. It was so familiar that it made him almost immobile, before he suddenly broke into a run to where the person crying was.

"Nee-san!" He called when he saw the petite girl who looked so much like him, except for the slightly longer hair. The girl looked up and saw him. "Nee-san!"

"Subaru?" The girl tilted her head slightly, trying to see her younger twin more closely. "Is that you? Why are you here?"

"Nee-san, why are you here?" Subaru asked back, and immediately earned a kick from her. "W-Why did you do that? No, why do you always do that?"

"It's because I was the one asking the question! And yet, you ignored that and asked a question of your own!" She wiped her tear-streaked face and glared at her younger brother. Subaru merely smiled weakly in an answer. How could he actually begin to explain what' had been happening to him? "Hmmm… Does it concern a guy?"

"O-Of course n–! Well… actually… I… Yes…" He sighed in admittance. He would be fooling not only the people around him but also himself if he answered otherwise. Even if it wasn't the typical _it's a because of a guy or a girl, _Kamui was still a guy, right? So in a sense, he was still having all these problems and pains all because of a guy. _And everything that he was doing right now wasn't even for Seishirou…_

"It's not that man, isn't it?" Hokuto guessed.

"How do you know?" Subaru asked, a bit too out of it to actually understand that the girl might just be one of the traps the palace had in storage for him. But somehow, he knew she wasn't.

"It's because you never have those unwavering eyes when that man is concerned." Hokuto said kindly. "Your eyes right now have a firm grip on what you want. And their radiance doesn't reveal something as petty as guilt. You really care for that guy, don't you?"

Subaru's eyes widened when the idea was spoken by his sister. It seemed too ridiculous, if only it wasn't her that actually said it. He gaped and even stuttered in his words as he tried to argue his side. "N-No, nee-san. You're wrong… I might have cared for that kid a little back when I was still part of the Dragons of Heaven. But now, I–"

"Subaru," Hokuto interrupted before her brother could finish. "Do you know that your eyes darken a bit when you lie, even if unconsciously? That's the reason why I always knew if you're lying or not… Do you know that?"

"T-That's…" Subaru couldn't argue with that. He knew his sister was using something to tell if he was lying or not. That's why he hated lying in front of his sister. "But that idea is so ridiculous I can't even laugh!"

Hokuto wore a pained expression. "You think that caring for The Kamui is something so ridiculous?"

Her brother looked taken aback by her question. "N-No, I didn't–! Why are you saying this now? You know what lowlife creature I've become. I don't have any heart anymore! It died the moment Seishirou-san did!"

Hokuto looked down. "Then if what you say is true, abandon the pretense of caring for him and stay here with me. I'm too lonely here by myself, you know…"

Subaru somehow knew she wasn't just making him admit that she said was the truth. She looked really sad right now, and anyone would be scared to be alone in a void world like this. He feared it too, back when he still cared. He gave her a smile and a light embrace as he whispered in her ears. "Sorry, nee-san. I can't. I promised Kamui I'll bring his soul back. I don't want to abandon him again." He missed her, he really did. But he knew what he must do, and it wasn't to coop himself up in this place and abandon Kamui again.

Hokuto closed her eyes and smiled. _She won after all. _"Then go to where he is and immediately lock him in embrace too!" She giggled as she pulled away from her brother. "It's scary to be alone, you know. That's why you need to find him soon."

Subaru smiled again. "I'll find him. I'll definitely find him and give him his soul back. That's the least I can do to atone for my sins…" _before I die._

And almost immediately, Subaru disappeared from her sight. "See? I knew I'm right after all. You really do care for him."

"You're quite the actress there, Sumeragi-san." A voice from behind her said. She turned around met his gaze before she wore a bright and delightful smile which made the darkness immediately turned into a seashore scenery. She sighed. "Ah, this is infinitely better!"

Kakyou smiled behind her. "Yes, but I still can't believe you actually lied to him, saying something like you're alone and all." Hokuto merely laughed at his comment.

Subaru thought the darkness would end by now, but it still didn't. He half expected to see more of Seishirous and Hokutos in the dark, but nothing came. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He was utterly surprised when a scent he knew too well was carried to his nose. _Kamui… He's here! _And when he realized that fact, it's as if a light turned on and everything went too bright for his eyes to see. He felt a strong gust of wind brushing his cheeks and immediately knew he was somewhere high in altitude.

He opened his eyes again only to feel utterly bewildered and disturbed. He stood nowhere other than the cursed Tower which he hated so much. "Tokyo… Tower?" He mumbled in question. He knew he was still in another dimension, but the scenery just looked so real he was starting to doubt his claim. Everything was calm now. It was, after all, the time after The Kamui of the Dragons of heaven fought and killed his twin star. The wind sang a singsong melody and he couldn't help but long for the serenity of the place. _If only it didn't hold such heart-wrecking memory…_

His thoughts were disturbed when he inhaled the scent again. "Kamui..?" He called even though he couldn't see anyone. At the sound of the name, however, it seemed as if the owner woke up and presented himself in front of the onmyouji.

This Kamui too looked lifeless and broken that it pained Subaru to look at him. He was wearing the thin turtle-neck sweater that he wore even now and the tattered pants. He looked so miserable and wrecked that Subaru couldn't even voice his name out loud. "Kamui… Come over here…" He said, seeing that Kamui stood on the edge of the railing. Subaru had the impression the boy wasn't there just to inhale some fresh air. He held out his hand and did his best to smile.

Kamui smiled back, but in a painful way. "Fuuma is gone…" He voiced, and immediately Subaru knew what the boy was planning to do. But before he could even react, Kamui already jumped from tower. Subaru's heart dropped in that instant.

"Kamui!" He also jumped without any thought and merely followed his former master. His hand was still out-stretched as he tried his best to at least get a hold of Kamui's hand. Kamui was falling headfirst and so was Subaru. The onmyouji could feel hot tears on his cheeks, but he knew it wasn't his. Somehow, Kamui's tears were falling on him, however, ridiculous that may sound. "Kamui… Please don't die…"

He did his best as the Sakurazukamori and was able to catch up Kamui's falling speed. Again, however ridiculous that idea may sound. After all, the laws of physics only applied to freefalling objects, and not to those who was really trying their best to fall faster. He used his superb reflexes to be able to hold Kamui by the hand, and it somehow amazed him how the boy's warmth seeped through his gloved hands.

"Kamui…" He voiced, unable to bear the overwhelming pain in the other's expression. "I won't leave you…" It amazed even Subaru how he could be full of contradictions. He wanted to die by Seishirou's hands. And he not only hid his heart but also killed it. He wanted to die and yet he just promised Kamui he would never leave the boy's side. His heart was supposed to be no more, so where did that promise come from? His mind was to die after this whole charade was over, but why did he promise such a thing then? Seishirou was all he wanted to be with, then why did he say he would never leave Kamui? _It's because of his guilt, perhaps…_

Kamui looked surprised for a while, tears-streaked face showing every evidence of uncertainty and doubt, which somehow hurt Subaru more than the fact that Kamui hated him. _Kamui doesn't trust him anymore…_

"Kamui… I promise… I won't leave your side anymore…" He repeated, still unaware on where his promises were coming from and where it would take him. He didn't love the boy, and what would become of Kamui if he, the Sakurazukamori, were to stay?

After a while, Kamui held his hand too, and somehow, Subaru felt sure his heart skip a beat, even for just a split second. He pulled Kamui and locked him in an embrace. It calmed him down, the boy's warmth and his scent. Kamui smelled so nice, and he felt so warm and alive. Subaru kissed his hair twice before he tightened his hug on the boy. _Did this mean he really did care about Kamui just like his sister said? Did this mean that his heart wasn't truly dead, just buried under the pile of anguish and solitude that he pushed himself into? _He still didn't know that for certain, but he was sure he felt more than _petty guilt _for the boy. _It might be compassion… _And that awareness made his mind clearer. _Kamui was important to him, not just because he was The Kamui, but because he was Kamui. _

"Don't leave me... like Fuuma did…" Kamui spoke brokenly after a while. Subaru could only nod. Kamui was broken, and he didn't want the boy to feel any more pain. The quiet and warm tears that fell on his coat one by one were only proof of the pain that Kamui felt.

"I promise." He said, even if he was still unsure of what his promise could bring. He knew that he would really be able to stay from Kamui anyway. He just feared what it would make Kamui feel. _To be with the one he liked without his feelings ever getting returned…_

Kamui looked up at him and Subaru looked back. They stared at one another for a while before Kamui turned so bright that the onmyouji had to close his eyes for a moment, though his hug didn't loosen. If ever, he hugged Kamui tighter. And his mind went blank.

When he woke up next, he was embracing a glowing white feather. He landed on the ground without even as much as a scratch. He felt that everything that just happened was merely a dream, except for the fact that in his hand was a feather as warm as Kamui's tears that he felt on his cheeks earlier. His finger rose up and touched his face. He remembered the promise he made. He closed his eyes again.

"Kamui…" He mumbled as he held the feather tightly before he slid it in his pocket, together with the other one.

In an instant, everything went dark again.

When Subaru's surrounding turned bright, he was already inside a room that felt so different from the earlier dream-like places. It held some sort of sereneness and prestige not even he as a Sakurazukamori could afford. In the middle of the room was a canopied bed and across it was a grand door leading to the balcony. But all of that wasn't what made Subaru stopped surveying everything and focused his widened eyes on a specific place.

There, at the balcony stood the boy that plagued his dreams and occupied his thoughts these past few months. The boy's back was turned on Subaru, revealing his slenderness within the turtle-neck sweater that he was wearing. He wasn't wearing any of the prestigious clothing that he wore earlier, but Subaru couldn't be fooled anymore. This boy… is definitely _Kamui._

"Kamui…" He voiced quietly. The boy whose name was called slowly turned around to meet his gaze. But far from the wounded and broken boy that always held Subaru's thoughts, this boy held no such feelings. His amethyst eyes were clear of any uncertainties and his face free from heart-wrenching pain.

Kamui looked at him with steady gaze which once again made him feel that his heart was having this unexpected skipping thing. Kamui opened his petite mouth and uttered an unintelligible question. "Wh–?"

"I've brought two of your feathers, Kamui." Subaru couldn't help but smile.

"Wh–?"

"Hmm?" Subaru asked, not understanding the question that the boy had been asking.

"Who are you?" Kamui asked in utter innocence that was so cute if only the question that accompanied it hadn't made Subaru stunned in his position. His smile had vanished with the shock that followed.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Yeah, I know you'll be killing me if I ever go out of my room again. **

**.**

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: (*looking all happy and childlike*) Is that the real me now? Am I really awake?

Subaru: (*dark and gloomy mood*) Shouldn't the question be 'why can't I remember Subaru'?

Kamui: Oh. I don't really know why I said that… And who are you?

Subaru: (*shocked; the cigarette from his mouth fell on the floor*)

Kamui: (*laughed*) Sorry, just trying to do some teasing.

Ren-sama: Ah. Subaru left. I think he's too shocked that you don't know him outside 'Broken Wings' too. That's why he didn't hear that you said it was only a joke.

Kamui: Should I follow him and apologize?

Ren-sama: (*grin*) I wonder what you two will do if you're alone with each other…

Kamui: Don't think such dirty thoughts. Everyone, please make sure to review or this person's perversion will only get worse.

Ren-sama: Kamui left. And Host-san isn't here too. Maybe I hit him too hard when he brought some annoying pests, I mean guests, last time… Well, it doesn't matter. I guess I'll just have to sleep for now. (*snore, snore*)


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"_Who are you?"_

"Now that's what I call a heartbreak." Ryuu smirked as he watched Subaru from the mirror-like water on the flooring of the dark room. This room belonged to a great magician named Eriol. The magician was Ryuu's great great grandfather. His father, Yasha, and mother, Ashura, were watching together with him.

Yasha laughed. "I like it so much. Ah, that awfully horror-stricken and shocked face was being worn by the Sakurazukamori of all people. It's just too amusing!"

"Yasha, you're too evil." Ashura scolded as he looked at Subaru's expression. Total agony and despair were reflected in the onmyouji's shocked eyes.

"He's more evil than I am. He killed many of my people." Yasha said, trying his best not to enjoy the face of the lad twisted in so much pain and suffering. "He should be thankful I didn't actually perform my revenge while he's in there."

"Of course. Yuuko-san will get mad." Mokona said and Yasha smiled. "Don't you think you're soft after all, King Yasha? Yuuko made the feathers compensation for your wishes, but she didn't say you can be as lenient as you want with the Sakurazukamori."

Yasha actually laughed in amusement. "Mokona-san, for someone who's not there, the scene may look like it was simply a matter of trying to think that everything is a fake except Kamui. It may be simple to think that way because we are not inside that illusory world. But for someone whose life had been so twisted by pain and misery, there is nothing more painful than making decisions like the Sakurazukamori just experienced. It was only because his feelings for The Kamui was so strong that he can get out of the Maze Card combined with the Illusion Card."

"Feelings, huh…" Mokona muttered. "I wondered what he feels about The Kamui after all…" Yasha chuckled at the question. It was so obvious to everyone except for the man in question.

"But I wonder what's with the total darkness earlier?" Ryuu asked. There was suddenly only darkness reflected in the water after Subaru's scene with the Sakurazukamori and before the scene in the Tokyo Tower. "It felt so disturbing."

"Kakyou, one of the greatest dream seers, maybe…" Ashura said. "But he alone couldn't possibly do something this powerful."

"Then maybe he has a companion." Mokona said. The royal family looked at him and agreed.

"Let's watch his agonizing experience for now." Yasha suggested, and they all turned to the water once again.

Subaru felt like icy cold water from nowhere was suddenly poured down on him repeatedly. He's in too frozen a state that he couldn't even move. It felt like he was slapped repeatedly with such overwhelming force that he thought he'd lose his balance and sanity. _'Who are you?' _is nothing but an innocent question to the boy. But to him, it felt like his whole identity was rejected and erased. It felt like Kamui hated him to the core after all, for him to suddenly erase his memory of Subaru like that…

_I was a member of the Dragon of Heavens… the person whom you loved. I was the one who betrayed you, the one who made you experience hell… The one who left you so helpless and alone in the midst of pain and misery… I was the bastard who did nothing but hurt and slowly kill you even though all I wanted was to erase my own pain… I was the selfish bastard who did all this to you… I… the **Sakurazukamori**…_

_He couldn't say it…_

"I…" he managed to voice, because the innocent boy in front of him looked like he was waiting for an answer. "M-My name is Subaru. S-Subaru Sumeragi…" The boy watched him stutter and he felt so pathetic for feeling so nervous all of a sudden. "Y-You're Kamui… right?"

Kamui nodded as he blinked slowly. His eyes had radiance in them that Subaru didn't know existed, not even when he first met the boy. "You're a companion in our journey, Kamui. We are currently in a journey, trying to fin all of your scattered feathers. I've brought some of it…" Subaru explained with much difficulty. The boy clearly rejected his identity, and yet he still wanted to stick around and at least prolong their conversation, before the boy would say he didn't need someone he didn't know.

The onmyouji took the feathers out of his pockets and showed them to Kamui, hoping that when they were returned, the boy would recognize him. But now that he thought about it, now that he had calmed down, he was actually partly thankful that Kamui didn't know him. The boy would probably try to escape from him if Kamui recognized him. Subaru thought he was something like a thorn of pain for Kamui, and that fact somehow made what's happening right now a bit tolerable. _So what if Kamui didn't know him anymore? So what if Kamui didn't need him anymore? __**He needed Kamui**__, and that was all there was to it._

The feather flew over to where Kamui was, as if compelled by some invisible force. Subaru watched Kamui's surprised and innocent expression in quiet amusement. "They're pieces of you soul." He found himself saying.

Kamui's surprised expression turned awed as he watched the feathers glowed beautifully before it slowly entered inside him from the chest, filling him with warmth. He closed his eyes as his body slowly glowed in response to his soul. Subaru watched as wings sprouted from his back, just like last time. But unlike then, these wings were at least thrice bigger.

"_So his wings grew with every feather…" _Subaru thought as he watched in half amazement and half anxiety. He both wished and feared that Kamui would remember him with the return of those feathers. He wished to be remembered by the person who loved him so much it broke the boy. But he also feared that if Kamui remembered him, the boy would disappear from his sight forever. _He, the eternal Sakurazukamori, would die if that happened…_

But even after the glow disappeared and Kamui opened his eyes again, nothing registering to recognition made their way in his expression, which made Subaru half disappointed and half relieved.

"Kamui, do you still wish to travel between dimensions with me?" He asked, fearing the answer from the boy. His expression must have showed that pain because Kamui walked towards him slowly and cupped his cheek with a hand. Subaru felt his head leaned on the side where Kamui's hand was as he let himself basked in its warmth.

"You're in pain…" Kamui voiced as he too wore a sorrowed expression. "Is it because of me..?"

Subaru held Kamui's hand and squeezed it in between his cheek and his gloved palm. _It's warm… so filled with life… unlike the Kamui from a few days ago… _"No, it's because I'm such a weak coward…"

Kamui smiled innocently. It was so sweet Subaru wanted nothing but to stare at him forever. "Can I travel with you..?"

The onmyouji closed his eyes to prevent himself from shedding confusing tears. "Of course..." His voice was steady but it was huskier than usual. He opened his eyes again and gazed upon those amethyst orbs as he cupped Kamui's cheek with his other hand. "I'm glad you're awake."

He used the back of his curled fingers to brush the boy's creamy pale cheek with his warmth. Subaru brushed the strand of hair that was on the boy's face before he let go of the boy's hand and let both his gloved hands fall on his side.

"Shall we get out of here?" Subaru asked and Kamui nodded silently. The onmyouji held Kamui's hand and gently pulled him on a walk. Kamui walked far, far slower than his usual speed but it didn't matter. Kamui was walking on his own and that's all that mattered to the onmyouji right now. They went out of the room and walked some corridors before they reached a magnificently furnished stair and descended on it.

"Where is this place?" Kamui asked behind Subaru.

"It's a palace owned by some annoying gay men." Subaru answered curtly. He felt three presences approaching in utter swiftness and immediately knew who they were when the first one spoke.

"Now, that's rude. A kettle is actually calling a pot black?" A voice from behind them spoke. Subaru had to turn and pull Kamui in an attempt to shield him from the royal people. As he looked upstairs, he saw Yasha and Ashura both leaning on the balustrade with their arms crossed. The King was the one who spoke and he now added more. "Want to elope with the princess now?"

Subaru glared at them both but didn't let go of Kamui's hand. _Not anymore… _He knew he didn't have any special feelings for Kamui, but the boy was still important to him, _that_ he would not deny from himself. Maybe he could see Kamui as a younger brother that needed some protection, or something like that…

"Subaru!" Mokona hopped from atop the stairs and onto his shoulder. He was lighter than how he looked so Subaru's shoulder didn't hurt at all despite the force that the fall had.

"Where've you been, fur ball?" Subaru asked. "Happy assisting them now?"

"Eh? How did you know?" Mokona tried to be as innocent as he could, but it seemed it had no use.

"Because I can smell their annoying scents all over you." Subaru answered, making sure he glared the coldest at Mokona who betrayed him. He then realized that Kamui was watching him and immediately tried to calm himself down. He wouldn't want to scare the boy in their first meeting, or at least it was their first meeting for Kamui.

"Sorry, but Yuuko-san told me to assist them." Mokona said and Subaru somehow knew the annoying witch had something to do with this elaborate scheme. Those royalties wouldn't just let the feathers fall into his hands if it weren't something like that after all. He bet they wished for something totally extraordinary that the compensation was this heavy. But still, thanks to that, he was able to get back Kamui's feathers without breaking a bone or breaking his mind, at least not too much.

"Can't help but hold The Kamui's hand that tight?" Ryuu asked. He looked too grumpy that Subaru somehow knew the marriage act earlier wasn't an act at all.

"Well, I guess the Sakurazukamori won." Yasha clapped his hands in slow annoying manner that irritated Subaru even more. "How about some festivities before you leave?"

Subaru looked too suspicious but Mokona assured him that they wouldn't do anything that would imbalance the compensation. After that, Nokoru and Fuuma were called inside the palace too. And from their shocked eyes registered Kamui's reflection.

"He's already awake…" Fuuma mumbled as he stared at Kamui's solid gaze. It's very shocking to see the boy standing on his own two feet and looking at him with those innocent eyes. He looked more like the prince now than when Fuuma last saw the boy.

"Hello, Kamui-san." Nokoru said as he smiled as he held out his hand. "I'm Nokoru Imono–"

"Okay, let's all dig in!" Mokona yelled on top of his voice which caught Kamui's attention away from the blonde. He immediately hopped away and entered the huge dining hall. He hopped on the table while making a spoon and a fork clang loudly against a huge empty plate. Nokoru chuckled as he sighed and let his hand fall on his side.

"Shall we eat?" Subaru asked Kamui, who only nodded and followed him.

Nokoru couldn't help but smile at that. He didn't know the Sakurazukamori could be so nice to anyone. Well, from the start, Kamui was already above anyone as far as Subaru's dictionary was concerned, so there was no doubt about that. The most stunning part was that the guy didn't care if he was seen as corny or cheesy or something like that, as long as he could please Kamui. And with that, he remembered his reason why he was travelling with these people. "Suoh…"

"Oy, Nokoru!" Mokona called his attention. He realized that all of them were already seated in the table, except him. He chuckled as he also sat in his seat.

Almost all of them ate quite voraciously after not having eaten for at least a whole day and night. Subaru as usual ate timidly, not being the type of person to eat so much in the first place. He was more concerned in feeding Kamui than feeding himself.

"You should eat something more easy to digest, but can give you enough energy." Subaru said quietly beside Kamui and chose some of the light but nutritious meals. He felt that Kamui was undernourished and he also blamed himself for that.

The others looked at the two of them with silent amusement as they all ate. Kamui seemed satisfied with Subaru's mother-like attention and he silently ate everything that the older male put on his plate. "You should eat something nutritious too, Subaru." He said after a while, which made Yasha laugh. The latter made it seem like he was laughing at a joke that his wife just said. But Subaru knew better than to believe that.

The onmyouji tried his best to erase the others' presence so he wouldn't get too self-conscious despite their stares, but in futility. His senses were keener than ordinary people because he's an onmyouji and he's a member of the Dragons of Heaven. But now also because he was the Sakurazukamori.

Kamui tried to put some foods on Subaru's plate. But the boy, it seemed, still lack control of some of his common sense and made the serving totally fitted for at least three people. Subaru looked at the enormous mound of varied foods on his plate and gulped. He knew he couldn't eat all of them. But Kamui did this just for him and he knew he had to at least repay the kindness.

"He'll eat everything." Yasha whispered to the people beside him, which were Ashura and Ryuu.

"At least there's a silver-lining in me not marrying Kamui." Ryuu voiced. "I too would be subjected to eating that many a meal. Ah, I wonder how the Sakurazukamori will digest all that."

"And he was not the type to eat so much." Nokoru smiled.

"That's what he gets for doing unnecessary things for the brat." Fuuma said with a snort. But he too was curious as to what Subaru would do. The Sakurazukamori's calm and cool face betrayed nothing to them so they weren't sure how he badly wanted to run away right now.

And just like Yasha predicted, Subaru murmured some thanks to Kamui, who returned his words with a smile. The onmyouji started eating the food in slowness that was kind of pathetic. It made the King hide a grin before he voiced his comment out loud, just so he could tease Subaru. "If my wife would give me food and smile at me sweetly, I will definitely eat with more voracity and gladness." He laughed in satisfaction when Subaru glared at him again.

Ashura's grin turned darker, which made him even more menacingly beautiful and made Fuuma and Nokoru glanced at one another. And when Yasha looked at his plate again, it had food fitted for at least five people. He looked at Ashura who immediately gave him an angelic smile. His wife looked so beautiful with his long black hair and gleaming golden eyes.

"Y-You–" Yasha sighed in defeat but he still didn't regret teasing Subaru. He was serious anyway. If it was from Ashura, he'd accept anything. He loved his wife so much. And that's why they made their wish, because Ashura wanted it.

"Can I ask something?" Nokoru voiced after a while. Yasha simply nodded because he couldn't afford to talk what with all the food that was stuck in his throat. "Subaru-san killed some of people. There's no waiting punishment after this merriment, is there?"

Ashura looked at them kindly. "One of this kingdom's rules is that a person is allowed to kill someone in self-defense or if something was stolen from him by his target. Other than that, he will be immediately executed for taking another's life."

"Even if it was only a coincidence, the Sakurazukamori still acted under those rules, so we can't punish him." Ryuu said. "If not, we wouldn't have any problem disposing him." That statement made Subaru's glare turned to him. The onmyouji was listening to them, apparently.

Yasha was able to swallow the foods stuck in his throat now. "That's right. There are many ways to destroy the Sakurazukamori other than killing him." His facial expression was too serious it convinced his guests that he was not joking. "First, the Sakurazukamori is supposed to be someone without any kind of emotion and remorse for anything. But as we all know, Subaru-san still has his emotions intact even after he became the cold-blooded assassin that hunts down people at night, or sometimes even during the day."

"So the Sakurazukamori is an assassin…" Nokoru muttered. He knew Subaru's aura was sometimes different than normal. _So it was something like that…_

"Why did you give me those two feathers so easily?" Subaru asked, trying to change the topic of conversation. It was so obvious in his far-off question what he was trying to do. Yasha was not at all too evil and let him have his way.

"It's compensation to a wish that the Witch of Dimension granted us, as what you've already guessed. And besides, what you experienced just then wasn't too easy. You actually had a change of heart in there too." Yasha said before he smiled kindly, remembering what the wish was. Ashura smiled too.

"What kind of wish is something that could cause you two feathers?" Fuuma asked.

Ryuu stood in utter smugness. "They wished to have me." No one reacted. "Oy, say something!"

"For him? Really?" Nokoru asked Yasha for confirmation. Both wife and husband nodded happily.

"You see, we're both males so we can't have a child." Ashura said. "And so we asked Yuuko-san to do something about it. Or more appropriately, our wish is only possible because we took a hold of two of The Kamui's soul pieces."

Fuuma snorted. "That bitch's price was really that high?"

"You're wrong, Fuuma." Mokona spoke for the first time, having been busy eating earlier. Fuuma had to suppress the urge to kick the fur ball for his rudeness. "It is the hardest to kill a life." He glanced at Kamui's direction. "More so to give one."

"I see." Nokoru agreed. "It is really hard to just create something that doesn't exist. Wait, you mean Kamui-san's feathers can be a compensation to give someone a life?"

"Nokoru-san, your wish is a little bit different from theirs." Mokona said. "They wanted to have a child, and Yuuko-san only assisted. But your wish is on an entirely different level. And it is imposs–"

"Mokona-san, can you pass me the soup?" Nokoru asked with a smile, interrupting the animal's statement. Fuuma and the others looked at Nokoru meaningfully. Mokona, meanwhile, was easily distracted and gave Nokoru the soup.

"It is impossible to resurrect the dead." Subaru finished for the fur ball. He's an onmyouji and he knew that fact better than anyone. Nokoru wanted to pour the soup on him, except for the fact that he looked like he wanted to try doing that too if only he could do it.

"_Fuuma was killed by Kamui and Seishirou was killed by Subaru. And those two people's death broke them too deeply, to the point that they wanted nothing but to die. But Subaru has become the Sakurazukamori and thus he cannot die. Kamui didn't have the courage to kill himself until recently."_

Mokona's words rang in Nokoru's ears and the latter had to divert his gaze just so he wouldn't feel any kind of pity for the two. Mokona also looked at them as he paused from eating. Kamui had lost all of his memories but Subaru still continued to bear the pain that those deaths carried.

"It is my wish. And I will do my best to achieve it." Nokoru said seriously, as if challenging anyone who would dare oppose his view. "I will not waver, Subaru-san, even if it's impossible. I'm sure you understand what I mean."

Subaru had the feeling that the blonde was trying to tell him that that wish was all he had left, so he chose to stay silent and not comment anymore. It would only hurt them all if they insisted their own beliefs.

He looked at Kamui and realized that somehow it was best that the boy didn't remember anything. It was best that he was innocent. _It was best that he wouldn't experience pain anymore…_

Kamui looked up from his food and his gaze immediately turned to Subaru. The latter's gaze was pained but he tried to hide it. He patted Kamui's head and smiled.

Yasha cleared his throat. "So, are you going to set out on your journey again after this meal?"

"Of course." Fuuma answered.

"Yuuko-san wants to relay her message to you, Subaru-san." Yasha said. He wasn't supposed to say it until the four males were finished eating, but he knew he had to tell them now in case he might forget. Subaru looked at him and he said what he needed to tell. "She said that there's a suspicious group of people that has started to try and find the soul pieces too. No, more particularly, this group's only mission is to find Kamui's core, where almost half of his full power lies. Yuuko-san said that she doesn't know who the members of this group are or what their aim is. But she's sure the members are dangerous."

"What the–?" Fuuma mumbled as he took in the new news. "Somehow, every time she wants to talk to us, she brings with her some of the worst news that she can find."

"How did she know that this group exists?" Nokoru asked in apprehension. He was in the middle of drinking his juice and the news made him pause in midair.

Subaru just gritted his teeth in silence. He wanted to protect Kamui and prevent any kind of pain from befalling him, but with this, he was sure Kamui would be in danger again. _He wanted Kamui to live peacefully and away from any pain… And yet, fate wasn't that kind…_

"She asked if you remember Hibiki, the man whose son held your first feather." Ashura asked. They all nodded. How could they forget something that happened just a few days ago?

"She said that some suspicious men questioned him. They wanted the feather so much that they threatened his family's life. But since the man didn't have it anymore, they couldn't do anything but leave." Ashura voiced.

"You mean they were just some days away from catching up to us?" Fuuma gritted his teeth. There were too much things that they had to do, and now there's this group? "And that also means that they will be here too."

"Yes, I think that as well." Yasha commented. "But since we don't hold the feathers anymore, I don't think there will be any problem for us. It's you we are warning." Nokoru nodded in understanding.

"And by the way, all of The Kamui's memories are inside the core so there's no need to hope or be disappointed that Kamui-san can't recognize you or remember anything right now." Ryuu voiced, specifically talking to Subaru. The latter simply nodded.

"He can't remember anything?" Nokoru asked in surprise, eyes widening a little. Even Fuuma had to stop and look at Subaru, question evident in his eyes even if he didn't say anything. They both knew Subaru was at least expecting the boy to somehow greet him when the latter woke up. But with this, Subaru was even more in pain than when Kamui was asleep. It was kind of devastating if the person had forgotten about you… _It hurts… _

Subaru didn't answer. In truth, he was still in an internal struggle as to what his real feelings were. He was thankful that Kamui couldn't remember anything, not the pains and sufferings, not the deaths of the people he loved and cherished, and certainly not Subaru's betrayal. And yet, at the same time, the incomprehensible feeling of longing and misery was gripping his chest tightly. _It was almost unbearable… _If it weren't for Kamui's innocent and kind expression as he looked at the onmyouji, Subaru might have lost it by now.

Ashura continued to relay Yuuko's statement. "She said that your most formidable enemy is not that group which seeks the core, but the core itself. After all, it is where Kamui's memories of everything, even why he wanted to disappear, are stored. The moment Kamui's core was returned to him, that boy will change considerably."

"No," Subaru objected in his quiet voice, which made them look at him. "He will not change. He will merely go back to how he was in these past months." Kamui looked at his pained expression and held his hands, trying to console him. It seemed the boy still didn't realize the topic of the conversation was about him. Subaru squeezed the other's hands tightly.

"The Kamui thought that his existence has no significance anymore after that Day after all." Mokona voiced. "And everyone abandoned him, including the person he loved…"

"Shut up." Subaru couldn't help but say. He knew the fur ball was merely explaining things for the others to understand, but he just couldn't face it when someone just slapped to his face that he abandoned Kamui.

By now, they all knew who Mokona was pertaining to, and it didn't help improve Subaru's mood. Kamui was the only reason he was not snapping at any of them right now.

"He's practically in full restraint today, unlike yesterday." Fuuma mumbled, but still enough for them to hear.

"It's because Kamui-san is already awake." Nokoru said with a smile. His eyes darted to Subaru, who was looking at each of them in his solid glare, before he looked at the onmyouji's hand, which was holding the teen's tightly. The blonde's smile widened.

After they ate, they just rested for a while before they all said goodbye to the Royal Family of Seireitei. Mokona's back sprouted huge wings and everything turned bright. Subaru felt Kamui tensed beside him and he hugged his former leader with much gentleness, trying to ease his nervousness, as they felt themselves get sucked to another dimension.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren-sama: Happy now, huh, Kamui?

Kamui: Yes, but why did I lose my memory? It's disturbing to know that Subaru is just there, hugging me and yet I don't feel anything.

Ren-sama: Well, you can just ask him to hug you here.

Kamui: (*blush*) By the way, where's that Host?

Someone: (*cleared his throat*) Mr. Hideki is still in the hospital so I, Yue, will be the temporary Host. (*not moving at all*)

Ren-sama: Uh, are you sure you can do a Host's job? Are you sure you can entertain the audience?

Yue: (*cool and serious*) There is no audience so there's no need to entertain anyone. I'll just keep my silence here.

Ren-sama: Alright, make yourself comfortable. (*smiled*) By the way, where's Subaru?

Kamui: (*smirked*) I think his character in the story has somehow managed to recover from the shock that Kamui doesn't remember him. But outside, he's still basically disturbed, and most specifically, upset.

Ren-sama: I see… Poor Subaru… If only I can do something to make his mood lighter…

Kamui: Aren't you the one who made his mood dark in the first place? Shouldn't you do anything at all?

Ren-sama: I'm thinking! (*Looked at Kamui, then grinned*) Maybe next chapter you can *&^%$ him or #$&%^ him! People will like that!

Kamui: (*blushed deeply*) No way! I'm the uke, right?! Shouldn't he be the one doing those things instead of me!?

Ren-sama: Oh, you're right. I can somehow make him lose his mind in the next chapter and do those things to you…

Yue: No wonder Mr. Hideki just chose to stay with Chi instead of hanging around here. That's all for today. Please review…


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

They all opened their eyes, only to wish they were dreaming. They were all some thirty or forty feet midair. Above them was a wide clear sky that seemed to stretch from everywhere. Below them was a solitary island that looked a little too small where they were. The ocean seemed to be also as wide as the sky and only few islands could be seen from where they were. But all these they had to see in just mere seconds as the law of gravity immediately pulled them down back to the earth's surface.

"DAMN FUR BALL!" Fuuma shouted as they all screamed in their fall.

But far from their expected pained butts and limbs, their fall was quite surprising, with just a thud as a sound. Nokoru immediately knew why the moment he tried to stand on his two feet and help Kamui. The land that they were supposed to be standing on was wiggling in its softness. Subaru too couldn't do so much as stand still.

"What the hell is this?!" Fuuma exclaimed as they all fell on a sticky cloud-looking pink thing.

"I think it's cotton candy?" Mokona voiced as he tried to taste the substance. It was so sweet that he giggled in delight. "It's cotton candy!" And he started his cotton candy assault happily.

"Where in a field of cotton candy?" Subaru asked as he approached Kamui. The latter couldn't stand much because his balance was still off. "Are you okay?"

Kamui smiled and nodded. Nokoru tried to help Fuuma stand too but the latter was able to stand on his own before he could even offer a hand. He chuckled at the other's stubbornness.

"Look! Look, everyone! Everything looks so yummy!" Mokona exclaimed. Not far from them was a small river. But instead of water, liquid chocolate ran in it. Mokona drank some and licked his lips after. "It's so delicious! Mokona wants to live here!"

"Kamui, no!" Subaru immediately held Kamui by the arm when the latter looked like he would join Mokona in tasting everything.

"But he said it's delicious." Kamui answered a little too innocently, eyes surveying the chocolate river with longing, which made Subaru kind of felt guilt for trying to stop him.

"It may be delicious but it can also be poisonous." He answered. He didn't want The Kamui to die of food poisoning, after all the trouble of keeping him alive. Nokoru laughed at Subaru's reason.

"Why not let him, Subaru-san?" He said. "It doesn't look like it's poisoned anyway." Subaru didn't answer but he huffed. Kamui bit his lower lip and gulped as he watched Mokona drank more of the chocolate liquid.

"Oy, fur ball!" Fuuma yelled. "Quit tasting everything! The brat–" Kamui looked at him with innocent amethyst eyes. "–I mean, Kamui wants to imitate you! Act more appropriate to your age!" He knew that Mokona was a lot older than he actually looked, just like Yuuko was. And it annoyed him that the fur ball acted like he was the youngest of them all.

"Eh? But…" Mokona's ears drooped gloomily. He looked at Kamui and grinned darkly. "Oy, Kamui! Come here!"

"Eh?" Kamui was about to go near him and drink too but Subaru immediately stopped him and the onmyouji then glared at the furry animal.

"Why don't we scan this place for now?" Nokoru said as he sighed. Subaru was being overly protective and was kind of treating Kamui like a child when just a few while ago he was treating the guy as a lover.

Nokoru's suggestion seemed the more appropriate action and they all started walking, following the river upstream like some people who were lost. They could see that there were mountains not too far from where they stood. And the huge mountains entirety looked like chocolate ice cream, with some white icing on top for the icy-looking sight. There were a lot of different trees, some had cotton candies for leaves and others looked like candies. There were spiral lollipops for flowers and bubble gums of different sizes for rocks.

Kamui picked a spiral lollipop flower and licked it like a child. Subaru sighed and just patted the teen's head. Kamui still looked cool even if he was eating a lollipop and that somehow made Subaru hid a smile. Mokona kept picking up some bubble gum stones and putting them in his mouth, that by the near end of the small river, his mouth was already overwhelmingly full. Not even Fuuma or Nokoru could resist the sweet temptation of chocolate grasses and candy fruits. Once in a while, they too would pick up some sweets here and there and eat. Only Subaru remained convinced that he was not a man of sweets.

Kamui stopped licking his lollipop and also stopped in his tracks while having a faraway look. "Bunnies…"

"What?" Nokoru and Fuuma asked in unison, both wearing confused expression. They all looked at Subaru, thinking he might know what the boy was talking about. But he too looked as dumbfounded as them.

"Bunnies…" Kamui repeated, a little louder than earlier, before he blinked innocently.

"What about the bunnies?" Subaru asked as he leaned closer to Kamui, thinking he might have misheard the boy. He brushed the hair off of Kamui's face as he touched the other's cheek, looking for answers.

"The bunnies are coming." Kamui looked at Subaru before he continued licking his lollipop again. He looked like he had forgotten something and then he looked at Subaru again. "Do you want some?" He asked as he held the lollipop close to Subaru's mouth. The onmyouji gulped before he licked a little.

"It… tastes sweet." He answered. Kamui nodded and licked the lollipop once more.

"I think Mokona already has a lot of influence on him." Fuuma looked at Kamui before he shook his head and sighed. Subaru glared at him. Kamui didn't seem to mind that Mokona was an influential entity to him.

"Ah, Bunnies!" Mokona exclaimed with delight.

"See what I mean?" Fuuma said in confidence, only to repeat the word together with Subaru and Nokoru. Not far from them were at least twenty snow rabbits. They looked a little harmless, except for the fact that Fuuma only measured up to their armored chests.

"Should we run?" Nokoru gulped as he asked his companions, but they knew they didn't need to debate much about it because the katanas that those rabbits carried looked really deadly even if their faces looked friendly.

They all stepped backward, only to realize that from behind them were more rabbits of the same size, but of chocolate color. They carried bigger weapons, like axes, scythes, and double-edged swords.

"Are they the ones battling among themselves or are we the ones they were trying to capture?" Fuuma asked as the rabbits neared. The small bubble gum stones rattled as gigantic footsteps marched along the riverside.

Subaru readied himself for battle while he held Kamui by the wrist. He, together with Nokoru and Fuuma, was ready to flee when the opportunity came, but it seemed that wasn't so necessary anymore as the snow-looking rabbits passed them without even glancing in their direction, which was under the rabbits' heavy footsteps. Now their primary concern was to not let themselves get squashed under the rabbits' feet.

They all tried to get somewhere safer when the rabbits started fighting. They hid behind some cotton candy bushes and watched the rather brutal fighting between the cute rabbits. They flinched when heavy axes cut rabbit skin or when katanas sliced a face or a torso. Subaru's hand was covering Kamui's eyes all the way, not wanting the teen to experience another fighting scene just after he woke up. And thus, they continued to watch until the rabbits all retreated on their sides once again without death but with many casualties.

Nokoru and Mokona both sighed, not realizing they were holding their breaths. They thought they were all okay now that the place seemed to have quieted a bit, only to realize that their situation was far from being quiet. Three of the giant snow rabbits circled them from nowhere and pointed their katanas at the travelers.

"Where are you from?!" One of the rabbits said. It had an eye patch on its left eye and a wood pipe in its mouth. Subaru immediately stepped in front of Kamui in an attempt of defense.

"We're travelers. We got here just now." Mokona answered enthusiastically, not even a hint of fright in his demeanor.

"_Happy are the ignorant." _Fuuma thought in his mind as he looked at the deadly katanas that the rabbits held close at their throats.

"They don't look like the Choco Bunnies, Boss." Another rabbit, one with a huge horizontal scar on his cheek, said. "And they are all midgets."

"Oy, who did you call a midget, huh?" Fuuma asked in his usual annoyed voice, only for his mouth to be covered by Nokoru's hands.

"Don't mind him." Nokoru said to the bunnies with a nervous laugh as he tried to keep Fuuma's mouth shut. "We're no Choco Bunnies or whatever that is. We're humans, I think."

"I'm Kamui." Kamui said with a smile to the one with the eye patch and pipe. He spoke from behind Subaru because the latter wouldn't get him nearer the bunnies. Not that they weren't so near to start with.

"_Happy are the ignorant!" _Fuuma exclaimed inside his mind as he tried to struggle from Nokoru's suffocating hand. The blonde was a lot stronger than he looked. Fuuma was kind of glad that Nokoru pulled away his hands after a while.

"So your name is Kamui, huh?" The rabbit with the eye patch said as he lowered his sword. The other two did the same. "I am Gorou, the Leader of the Candy Bunnies. The one with the scar is Scar and the third one is Kira."

"I'm Mokona!" Mokona exclaimed in delight. "The blonde is Nokoru and the one with the pineapple head is Fuuma. The quiet guy is Subaru." Fuuma had to fight the urge to kick Mokona and make him a soccer ball, making Gorou's face as the goal.

"C-Candy Bunnies?" Nokoru had to do his everything to prevent himself from laughing out loud. Outside, he looked like he just asked the question for confirmation. But Fuuma knew better than that because the corner of Nokoru's mouth was twitching.

"Do you live around here?" Mokona asked. "And by Choco Bunnies, do you mean those rabbits with brown furs from earlier?"

"Yes, and yes." The other rabbit named Kira, the third of them and the one with the bloodiest-looking katana, said. She was a female but her demeanor wasn't just so-so. They all looked at her as she spoke with much firmness and power. "Our community was beside the falls. And the Choco Bunnies are those bastards who are trying to take over our community." Her bright crimson eyes flared as she told of the other bunnies' intentions.

After all the introductions, the Candy Bunnies considered the travelers as a neutral group and invited them in the community. They had the shock of their lives when Gorou and the other two invited them to ride on their white furry backs. Mokona climbed up on Gorou's back happily without a second thought. Nokoru followed him with uncontained excitement, riding on Scar. It seemed he hadn't ridden on a bunny's back before. _But who did? _Subaru and Fuuma both looked at each other before they agreed, still with caution. Fuuma climbed Scar too, not wanting to ride together with the fur ball nor interrupt Subaru and Kamui which were about to ride on Kira's back. Subaru made Kamui climb first, assisting the boy in the climb before he too climbed with ease. The bunnies' furs were smooth and fluffy, except for some areas where there were deep cuts and gushes.

Though Kira said that their bunny community was near, it was still at the foot of the ice cream mountain, where a chocolate falls was located. The rabbits only took some ten minutes to reach their home, what with their giant hind legs and high jumping abilities. Subaru and Kamui could've travelled it in fifteen minutes with their powers. But normal humans would take at least half to one hour if running and up to two or three hours if walking just to get there.

The community was more of a shock to the travelers than the island itself. The bunnies' houses were made of humongous chocolate bars as walls, candies and other lollipops as fences and other decorations. Everything smelled so sweet. No wonder they thought the Candy Bunnies' furs had overly sweet scent. But except for that beautiful scenery, everything was a mess. There were many wounded armored bunnies everywhere, being tended by their families and friends. Nevertheless, they greeted Kamui and the others enthusiastically when they arrived.

Gorou invited them to his house and served them some cakes and chocolate for a drink. That's also where they learned that Kira was Gorou's daughter. Subaru wanted to throw up from inhaling too much sweetness, except for the fact that Kamui too was starting to smell really sweet. _There's a silver-lining in everything._

Kamui and Mokona ate the cakes that were served to them with much enthusiasm. It somehow surprised Subaru to know that Kamui could eat so much sweet foods. _He didn't know that that part of Kamui existed… _It amazed him that after all this time, he realized he still had a lot of things to learn regarding Kamui.

Nokoru chuckled beside Subaru. "Kamui is such a cutie, isn't he?" He voiced. Subaru didn't answer even though he knew Nokoru was talking to him.

"Oy, Kamui." Fuuma called when Gorou left to get some more sweet foods. The boy looked up and their gaze met. Fuuma cleared his throat, realizing he was staring too much. "Don't eat too much. That old man also did the same…" Kamui looked at him in silent confusion before he remembered that Kamui was still asleep back then. He sighed. "Never mind. Enjoy your meal."

Kamui smiled at him in an innocently sweet way and Fuuma immediately looked away to hide his embarrassment. Nokoru saw that and grinned. Subaru saw that too and glared. For him, the man would just bring unwanted emotions and memories in Kamui. After all, Fuuma looked exactly the same as the best friend that Kamui killed. _It's best that Kamui didn't remember anything after all… even if he was also one of those who were forgotten…_

After a while, they all had no choice but to eat as Gorou and his daughter Kira started eating with them. They learned that the island was in a place called the Grand Line, where every island had no connection to each other and where pirates roamed everywhere. But the Candy Island remained uninhabited by people because the Candy Bunnies and the Choco Bunnies were there.

"Hunh… Candy Island… Grand Line…" Fuuma tried to think. It didn't ring a bell. It meant that this world still wasn't his dimension. And besides, that fact was already too obvious with the sight of chocolates, candies, and huge bunnies everywhere.

Everything went right, except that Gorou gave them soft cotton candies as bed for the night. Fuuma gulped. He didn't want to smell anything like the rabbits. Mokona played on the cotton candies and got a hit from Fuuma when he tried to eat them too. Kamui yawned drowsily, and Subaru had no choice but to let him sleep in the so-called _bed. _The boy fell asleep immediately, not plagued by any unwanted nightmares. Subaru wished that that setting would continue forever. He too wanted to just forget everything and sleep, but he knew the nightmares would come the moment he let his guard down.

He remembered how Kamui spent days and night crying in his wake hours and screaming in his sleep. He remembered the pain and anguish that was so clearly etched on the boy's face whenever he'd dream of Fuuma, or of Kotori, or of Subaru, or of their other comrades who died that day. Subaru wanted to comfort him so much, but afraid that his presence would bring even more pain to Kamui than reassurance. After all, he was one of Kamui's nightmares. _Maybe that's one of the reasons why he didn't want Kamui to remember anything about the past… _He didn't want Kamui to hate him anymore, but he also couldn't reciprocate the boy's love for him. He wanted to have Kamui by his side now, but he knew he would be the one running away when everything returned to how they were. _He was such a selfish person…_

"_I'm so selfish… I really am not worthy of your love, Kamui…" _He slowly opened his eyes and woke up, not realizing he had fallen asleep. He was on his side, facing Kamui who was using the onmyouji's right arm as a pillow. He was a bit surprised at first, not because of Kamui's proximity, but because of how he was able to sleep without screaming. _It seemed Kamui sleeping beside him was enough to keep the nightmares away… _Kamui's sleeping face was so close to his that he could even count those long lashes that slightly brushed the boy's cheeks. Kamui was gorgeous, only too gorgeous for a boy. He was gorgeous even at his worst. And now, he looked really dazzling with all the innocence that he had with him. Subaru brushed Kamui's right cheek with his left curled fingers. _How he had gotten so used to caressing Kamui's hair, cheeks, and face was still a mystery to him… _He didn't know if he would be able to live without Kamui by his side anymore…

"Ah. It's so early in the morning and he's already harassing Kamui…" Subaru jolted when Mokona's voice reached his left ear. Everything smelled of too much sweets that he was having some problem discerning who was who.

Nokoru chuckled not far from them. "I told Mokona-san to just be quiet and watch. But he couldn't help but rescue Kamui-san from harassment."

"I'm not harassing him. And when did you start calling him 'Kamui'? You always call him The Kamui like he's not human." Subaru answered calmly but he was glaring at both Nokoru and Mokona. He couldn't raise his voice in fear that he would wake Kamui up. Fuuma was still sleeping, but he was sitting in his sleep, head hanging in front of him.

"Kamui told Mokona earlier to just call him like how you call him. So 'Kamui' is what Mokona decided to call him." The fur ball answered, looking smug all of a sudden.

Subaru's glare turned softer when Kamui steered and nuzzled closer to him. Subaru fought hard not to feel any unnecessary emotions when he felt Kamui's warm breathe on his icy skin. It felt tingly and pleasant.

"Ah. Now he's imagining worse things than simple touching." Mokona said.

"Shut your mouth, fur ball." Subaru snarled. He and Kamui weren't like that at all. Kamui was just… yes, just like a little brother to him. He would never let their relationship get any deeper than that. _It would only hurt them both… Kamui was happier this way too…_

"What's that?" Fuuma voiced. They all looked at him and saw that he was already awake. He was looking outside the window where he was leaning in his sleep and looked really serious.

"What? What?" Mokona asked as he hopped towards the window. He looked up and he too let out an amazed voice. "Woah! What's that?"

"That humongous cloud is a Sky Island." They all looked at the door and saw Kira leaning on the doorway. "That is called Skypiea. It is where the feath–…" She cleared her throat, but it was too late. They already had an idea on what she was about to say. "It was where that calamity-causing thing fell from."

"When you said feather…" Nokoru asked and Kira visibly jolted and glared at him. She looked too huge when she's angry, and Nokoru had no choice but to adopt her term. "That calamity-causing thing, where is it?"

Kira looked at him suspiciously before she decided nothing would happen even if she decided to answer. "It's in the Choco Bunnies' territory. They consider it as their God now and worship it just because it fell so magnificently from the sky. It glowed and fell so slowly while glowing continuously. That's why they thought it's some sort of God."

"I see." Subaru answered even though he was facing the opposite direction and facing Fuuma. He couldn't move because Kamui was pillowing on his arm.

"I see that you're interested." Kira said suspiciously. "But I'm telling you. This community wishes to destroy that fea–, that thing. It caused so many calamities when it arrived on this island and even turned everything to sweets."

"The feather was the one that turned this island into a candy island?" Nokoru asked. Subaru looked at Kamui again, wondering what's with this part of his soul. It seemed a part of the boy wanted to create something like this. _But he being The Kamui destroyed his every dream…_

"Please don't destroy that feather." Subaru said. Kira didn't answer so he continued. "We'll help you take it from those Bunnies, but we want it. It's the reason we came here."

"We know." Gorou's husky voice echoed inside the room. He was behind Kira. "That boy named Kamui has the same presence as that thing. And we immediately knew you have some connection to that thing and came here for something like that."

"But can we know what you'd use it for?" Kira asked. "That thing was a disaster when it came here. It made the waves turn higher and reach our community beside the shore. That's why we're having our settlement here instead."

"That feather is part of Kamui's soul." Mokona said in seriousness as he hopped to where Nokoru was, beside the door. "He'll die if it's destroyed. No, more accurately, you'll die trying to destroy something as powerful as Kamui's soul."

Kamui, still deep in sleep and unaware that he'd become the topic of a serious conversation, nuzzled even closer to Subaru. The latter brushed his cheeks again, but now in absentmindedness, and pulled him closer. His warmth and silent breathing were giving Subaru the calmness that he had longed for so long.

"We'll let you have your way." Gorou said. Kira wanted to argue but decided not to. "But, you will immediately leave this island after you get that thing. I will not allow you to return to this community after that. Do you understand? You will leave immediately."

"We understand." Nokoru said with a smile. Fuuma merely looked at Gorou and Subaru's gaze was still on Kamui. Mokona nodded too. "We're planning to do that, actually."

"Then we are in agreement." Gorou said. "This community will resume our battle with them over our territory tonight. You people can use that opportunity to steal that menacing thing away from them."

"We understand." Subaru answered with mismatched eyes full of firm and unwavering determination and goal. He would definitely get his hands on that feather tonight.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: Subaru, I didn't know you're a pervert, touching the sleeping me so early in the morning.

Subaru: (*blush*) That's not it! I was merely brushing away the strands of hair from your face!

Kamui: So you can look at me more clearly while I'm sleeping? That's even more of harassment than earlier.

Subaru: (*menacing gaze*) Ren! Help here. You're the one who wrote that!

Ren-sama: Huh? Now don't go making assumptions that everything go according to my plan. I also didn't know that Chapter 11 would end up containing some overly sweet things.

Yue: (*quietly sipping tea without care*)

Subaru: (*turned to Kamui*) And what's with you nuzzling up to me like that?

Kamui: (*blushed too*) I–! That was–! I didn't know! I was asleep!

Ren-sama: (*happy*) Don't go bickering now! Remember that that was your first sweet moment! And there will be a lot more… I hope!

Kamui: What do you mean by that?

Ren-sama: Because this fic might end up FuumaXKa– (*Subaru glared at Ren-sama murderously*) Kakyou! It might end up FuumaXKakyou and the two of you might end up supporting characters in the end! (*nervous laugh*)

Kamui: That'll be boring. And Kakyou isn't even in the story anymore.

Ren-sama: Well, that's all for today.

Kamui: Hey, you didn't answer our doubts.

Ren-sama: Please review, everyone! I hope you're all enjoying the fan fict so far. Please leave some comments! ˆoˆ

Kamui: HEY!


	12. Chapter 12

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**I'm really happy about the reviews that I received from the last chapters! Though it's a bit saddening that lesser and lesser people tend to review my work… Now, I don't even know if it's still liked or not. But don't worry, I will still do my best, if only for the sake of those who give a little of their time to give me feedbacks! Please enjoy! ˆoˆ**

**P.S. Sorry for the delayed post. I was so busy these last few weeks.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 12**

"_Kamui… Kamui…"_

"_Kamui… Kamui…"_

_His amethyst eyes slowly opened to find the source of the voice. He was in a very dark place. "Subaru..? Fuuma..? Nokoru..? Mokona..?" He tried to call his companions' names repeatedly but there was no answer from any of them._

_He stood up and walked some distance, but there was still nothing to be seen but infinite darkness and solitude. Suddenly, he could feel his heart aching but he didn't know why. _

"_Kamui…" _

_The voice called again. Kamui turned around and saw a very beautiful girl with long, wavy blonde hair. She smiled when their eyes met._

"_Who are you..?" Kamui asked in confusion. "How do you know my name..? And where is this place..?"_

"_My name is Kotori. I'm your childhood friend, Kamui… But you've forgotten me…" She answered with a sad expression. Kamui looked a little lost, trying to remember anything concerning the girl in front of him, but there was nothing he could remember before he met Subaru in Ryuu's room that day he woke up. She noticed his confusion and tried her best to smile. "This place is inside your heart, Kamui."_

"_Inside… my heart?" Kamui asked again for confirmation. He knew it must be a dream. How could he be inside his own heart and seeing himself as a whole entity? It just didn't make any sense._

_Kotori chuckled and nodded. "I wasn't able to say goodbye to you back then. It's because you're too confused and broken that you weren't able to hear my voice. But now that you've calmed down, I can finally talk to you…"_

"_Why are you inside my heart, Kotori-san..?" Kamui asked, all wariness starting to disappear as he found himself comfortable with the conversation._

"_It's because you still can't let go of me." Kotori said. "You should remember everything, Kamui. And from there, you should learn to accept everything, so you can let go of me… and everybody else."_

"_Everybody else?" Kamui repeated, seeing no one else but Kotori. But then he blinked and there were so many people inside his heart now. They were smiling kindly at him. _

"_You look so well right now, Kamui. But also so lost…" A cheerful guy said. "Oh, I'm Sorata, by the way. Man, it hurts not to be remembered by the cute Kamui-chan." He sighed and looked at Kamui's reaction, but the latter only tilted his head to the side and looked at Sorata innocently. "Damn, I wish Kamui was this cute when he was the Leader of the Seals."_

_A girl with a red curly hair chuckled. "This Kamui would probably be the kindest member of the Seal then." They all started to converse and had already gotten in some cheerful topic about Kamui._

"_Um, excuse me…" Kamui called their attention and became a bit embarrassed when they all looked at him. "Um… why are you all inside my heart..?"_

_They all smiled kindly. Some of them, like Sorata and Kotori, chuckled. _

"_Because you won't let us go." A voice so familiar to him said. He looked and saw Fuuma._

"_Fuuma..?" He called uncertainly. "Why are you inside my heart too..?"_

_Sorata chuckled. "This Fuuma is not the same person as the one you are travelling with right now, you know. He's your friend back when you still remember everything."_

_Kamui looked as confused as ever. He looked down, deep in thought. "What do you mean when you said I can't let you go?"_

"_It means you won't let us pass on." A kind man with glasses said kindly. "We don't want to leave you all alone, crying every night like that. So we can't pass on and die peacefully. That's why we remain here, inside your heart. It's warm here, but we're trapped by your overwhelming bitterness and anguish."_

"_You must remember everything and move on, idiot." Fuuma said. But when Kamui looked at him directly, he turned his gaze away. That somehow puzzled the amethyst eyed boy. "Don't mourn for us anymore. Don't be eaten by guilt anymore. What happened was our own wish. What happened to me was my own wish."_

"_Kamui… Kamui…"_

Kamui slowly opened his eyes when he heard the voice. "Fuu… ma…" He thought those eyes belonged to the Fuuma inside his dream, but they weren't. They were mismatched, one a shade of green and one of deep crimson. And those mismatched eyes were currently experiencing the shock of hearing Kamui moan Fuuma's name in his sleep.

"Kamui… Are you awake now?" Subaru asked in silent panic. _What if Kamui already remembered everything? What if Yuuko was wrong? What if his memories were not in the core but just sealed somewhere? _That would totally destroy the sereneness of their relationship right now. It would break them again, if Kamui remembered…

"Subaru..?" Kamui asked as he cupped Subaru's pained face in his palm. "Am I causing you pain too?"

"N-No." Subaru answered almost immediately. He didn't know why Kamui was restless and kept on stirring in his sleep, moaning different names. But at least it didn't look like the boy remembered anything. "You should wake up now, Kamui. We're about to leave."

"Subaru…" Kamui called again when he sat on the cotton candy bed. Nokoru and the others were nowhere to be found.

"What is it?" Subaru answered absentmindedly as he too stood up and helped Kamui.

"Do you know anything about my lost memories?" Kamui asked in innocence.

Subaru froze when he heard the question. _Did he hear it right? Was Kamui really asking him this? Was it all naivety for him to think that Kamui would stay like this forever? _He didn't want Kamui to remember anything. He didn't want the boy to get hurt anymore. He didn't want to answer anything. He only wanted Kamui to live and smile. That's all he was wishing for… _And yet, was it too bad to ask for such a thing..?_

Kamui approached him and gripped his trench coat, somehow forcing Subaru to face him directly. "Subaru? Do you know anything? Can I know why I lost the pieces of my soul? And who's Kotori and Fuuma? And Sorata? Subaru!"

"Stop it! Stop questioning me!" Subaru asked a bit harsher than he intended, gripping Kamui's shoulders tight, which startled and hurt Kamui. The boy looked upset and immediately let go of the onmyouji's coat. Subaru too immediately let go of the boy's shoulder, realizing he was gripping them very tight.

"I'm sorry… I just… thought you might know…" Kamui mumbled. It was the first time Subaru acted like that towards him and that somehow hurt him deeper than he realized. He slowly took a step backward, away from Subaru's anger and his painful grip.

"Kamui, I'm sorry. I didn't mean–" Subaru stepped forward only to be stopped when the door suddenly opened with a loud bang. Mokona and Fuuma were fighting as they entered and Nokoru was chuckling, until they all saw the situation inside the room and totally stopped. They gazes travelled between Kamui, who looked terribly frightened, and Subaru, who looked so miserable with his right hand hanging in midair.

Nokoru let out an uncomfortable chuckle and Subaru let his arm drop on his side. "I guess we entered in the wrong time!"

Fuuma glanced at Kamui with creased eyebrow before he grabbed Mokona's head and walked out of the room without any word. Nokoru muttered some apology before he followed Fuuma and closed the door behind him quietly.

Subaru sighed, trying to calm himself down. "Kamui, I'm sorry. I promise I will tell you, but I don't think right now is the right time." Kamui was still looking at him with eyes full of pain and uncertainty, and it was making him feel more miserable. "I'm sorry. I promise, if we can both talk about everything calmly, then I'll tell you… But not now… I don't think I'll be able to–"

Kamui looked down for a while before he looked up again and did his best to smile. "I hurt you again…"

Subaru smiled as well, but pained, and shook his head. "No, everything is my fault…" Subaru stretched out his hands, signaling Kamui to come closer, and Kamui sighed in relief and immediately ran to his arms and hugged him. Subaru closed his arms and locked Kamui in an embrace. He kissed the boy's forehead and murmured more apology.

Kamui in his arms like this made him feel so calm and stable. Kamui's overly sweet scent was making his nose tingle and it was kind of funny how he liked it, even if he was not a man of sweets. He didn't have any younger sibling, but he was sure a younger brother would make him feel like this. _Yes, Kamui was like a younger brother to him… A younger… brother…_

Kamui wanted nothing but to melt in this man's arms. He wanted to make Subaru happy, but he always ended up hurting the man instead. He didn't know how he would be able to make Subaru at least smile, not his usual pained smile, but a smile full of radiance and life. _He wanted Subaru to be happy… _Right now, the voices in his heart that spoke to him earlier still echoed in his ears. He still very much wanted for his memories to return. But if it would make Subaru sad, then he could wait for a little while. He could wait for Subaru. Until Subaru was ready to tell him, he would not ask about it anymore…

"I'll definitely find all the pieces of your soul. I promise that." Subaru whispered in Kamui's ear, still refusing to let go of the boy even though he knew the situation was getting from bad to worse.

"Will you be with me always, Subaru..?" Kamui asked. Subaru's gaze locked with the boy's amethyst ones and the older male clearly saw the uncertainty and fear in the boy's amethyst orbs. He wanted to ease those pains away. He wanted nothing but to make Kamui happy, at least for now…

"I will. I promise." He said, realizing he kept on saying similar promises to the boy lately. He knew he wouldn't be able to fulfill it, but he just couldn't help but make Kamui's uncertainty go away. He hugged Kamui tighter, knowing he would hurt the boy once again after this was all over. He knew he would return to his former self after Kamui returned to being himself too. He knew that was inevitable, and he thought that was for the best. He had no right to stay at the boy's side after all. He knew that better than anyone. He would hurt Kamui if he gave his empty heart to the boy. He still loved Seishirou up until now, and he knew he would never love anyone as deeply as he loved the man. That's why… _That's why he couldn't be with Kamui… _

He knew his half-hearted and flitting emotions would only bring destruction to the boy rather than salvation. He knew that if he were to feel anything for the boy more than mere brotherly love, it would scare him and he would immediately retreat away from Kamui. He would bring more pain and heartbreak to Kamui… again. He knew himself more than anyone. He knew how tightly he guarded his heart, not letting even the petty feelings of friendship come across it. He knew that, all of that, and yet… _And yet, he couldn't let go of the little body that warmed him so, nor could he look away from those innocent amethyst eyes that stared at him so innocently. _

"Subaru?" Kamui asked when Subaru looked so frozen, staring at him with those overwhelmingly deep thoughts swimming in his mismatched eyes. He blinked in confusion when Subaru closed the distance between them.

Those bright and innocent amethyst eyes looked so dazzling and charming from where he was. They were gazing at him so directly, seemingly looking at his very soul. He felt uncomfortable but it also felt a little tingly. The boy's gorgeous face filled with concern for him, _only for him_, was making him feel so warm inside. Kamui's voice calling his name so gently was one of the reasons he was able to smile now, even if only a little. And the lips that uttered them… were so lovely and luscious that he couldn't help but stare at them. He started to close the distance between them, urge and desire winning over his reason. _He wanted to take it… He wanted to taste it… _

"Subaru?" Kamui called, so confused as to what was happening and too innocent to know what Subaru was thinking.

Kamui's voice, however, didn't wake Subaru from his daze. In fact, it only made his blood burn and his dried-up heart yearn for more. Not even he knew what he was feeling right now. He had never experienced it, not even with Seishirou. His love with Seishirou was something deeply emotional and psychological so he wasn't able to feel any strong and uncontrollable urges and desire springing from his body.

Subaru towered over the boy as the arms circling Kamui tightened. His tongue touched the boy's lower lip, which made Kamui whimpered in a feeling of pleasant confusion. The amethyst-eyed boy gripped Subaru's coat tighter, trying to balance himself physically and emotionally. But before he could even start thinking of what was happening, Subaru had Kamui's lower lip in between _his. _He sucked it gently, making Kamui whimper in delight once more. He could inhale the onmyouji's scent, which was overly sweet as well but with a faint scent of cigarette even though the latter had not smoked for quite some time now.

Subaru's right hand was encircled around Kamui's slender waist, pulling him closer, and his left hand was on Kamui's nape, also pulling the boy closer. He deepened his kiss and Kamui gasped, gaining Subaru a chance to enter his tongue in the boy's mouth. The taste of Kamui's mouth was so sweet that he wanted more… _He wanted more…_

Subaru woke up from his daze and both of them looked at the door when they heard a loud grunt. It was Gorou. Behind him were Nokoru, Fuuma, Mokona, and Kira. Subaru, in his shock, immediately pushed Kamui away, making the boy stumble backwards.

"S-Sorry, Kamui." He mumbled as he tried to help Kamui stand up. He could still feel the shock that wanted to overwhelm him. Kamui was still red and he knew he too must look like that. The others from the doorway made no comment whatsoever about they saw.

"We need to set out soon." Gorou merely said before he left.

"You can do other _things_ after the attack is over." Kira voiced before she too left.

That really made Subaru so embarrassed. He didn't know he, as heartless as he was, could still feel so lost in lust. _And to Kamui of all people! _He gritted his teeth. It shocked him how he liked it so much, even now.

"Done preparing?" Nokoru asked. Subaru's back was on him but the onmyouji knew the blonde was grinning. _Damn them for showing up like that! No, damn him for losing control over his own body and emotions!_

"We should go outside now." Fuuma said. "And don't go harassing Kamui when no one is around." That fellow really said everything. His statement stabbed Subaru deeply and made Kamui looked down on his feet.

Nokoru chuckled. "We didn't mean to embarrass you or make you feel uncomfortable. It's nice when you're both honest with your feelings."

"Shut up." Subaru managed to recover himself somehow and glared at the three. He then looked at Kamui with eyes full of guilt. "I'm sorry… I…"

Kamui looked up. He didn't know how he would react, but when he saw the pain in Subaru's eyes, he immediately shook his head. "No, it's alright. I do that with Mokona too, sometimes." He answered innocently. That shocked them all, and made Subaru glare at Mokona with triple intensity. "I-I mean, sometimes, when I cuddle him, I end up doing _that _but only for a short second…"

"Kamui's lips are so soft and delicious." Mokona said wearing a smug expression that made Kamui chuckle. Nokoru chuckled too. He knew that what Mokona and Kamui often shared was something innocent, while what Subaru shared with Kamui just now was entirely something else.

"Fuuma, you know what to do." Subaru voiced and Fuuma gripped Mokona's head and feet, squeezing him for real.

Fuuma did this but he knew he was only bending his anger on someone else. He knew Kamui was not his prince. But it still shocked him that Subaru would treat him like that. Even if Kamui said it was okay, he still found it unpleasant. And that thought totally made him stop. _Was he… jealous..? _No, of course not. Kamui wasn't his prince at all. His prince was his life and his everything. The brat was nothing like that to him at all.

They all went out in silence. Nokoru would sometimes sing some songs which they knew had some sort of connection to what happened in the room earlier, like 'Kiss, Kiss, Kiss' or 'Kiss Kiss Fall in Love' or 'Sealed with a Kiss'. Subaru wore a surly expression all throughout those times. Kamui was happily chatting with Mokona about the animal's 109 Secret Abilities while Fuuma was fighting the urge to strangle someone with a lousy singing voice.

When they went outside, all the Candy Bunnies were assembled in an orderly line. Gorou was making some speeches about their attack and was just about finished when Kamui and the others arrived. Kira looked at Subaru meaningfully when they arrived.

Subaru averted his gaze when he saw the female bunny looking. He was already embarrassed as it was. She didn't need to make him feel so perverted. After all, up until now, he could still feel his lips trembling in utter heat and excitement. He bit his lower lip so hard in disgust. _He loved Seishirou so much… and yet he just did such a thing to Kamui… to Kamui who loved and respected him of all people! How he hated himself for betraying two important people in his life… _And that thought brought him out of his musing. _Kamui was important to him, yes. But in what way? _He knew he loved and only loved Seishirou. But he felt something for Kamui aside from guilt and total brotherly love. He could feel something else blossoming inside him every time he looked at Kamui. It's annoying and he didn't like it. He was sure it would only bring destruction towards the two of them. _And yet, he couldn't fight it…_

"Subaru?" Kamui called his attention. He turned to the boy immediately, but also immediately turned away when he met that gorgeous amethyst gaze. "Are you alright? Is it because of earlier? It's alright… You don't need to avoid me…"

"N-No… I'm not… avoiding you…" Subaru looked at Kamui directly this time. He didn't want the boy to feel guilty about his own mistake. _Yes, what happened earlier was nothing but a sad mistake. He was just longing for Seishirou's touch… _"I'm sorry about earlier…"

"You already apologized. It's okay…" Kamui smiled sweetly, which only doubled Subaru's pain instead of easing it. The boy was such a charming person that the onmyouji felt like he was such an ass for actually doing something like that. Kamui was better off with someone who'd love him like the special person that he was, and not love him as a way to ease the pain and longing for a dead beloved.

"What happened earlier was a sad mistake. I was just being delusional. I was just imagining you as someone else." Subaru explained with a straight and serious expression, which somehow hurt Kamui in a way he couldn't understand. It somehow felt like Subaru hated that kiss so much that he couldn't get over it. _He hated kissing Kamui so much that he couldn't get over it…_

Kamui looked down. "Oh." But after a while, he looked up again. He was able to hide his pain inside, which he didn't know he could actually do. _Maybe he was good at it back when he still had his memories. _"Is that person someone special to you? The one you're imagining…"

"Yes." Subaru answered without hesitation and smiled at Kamui. He didn't think he needed to hide that part of him to Kamui. "He's the only special person in my life. My sister is special too, of course, but he was different. He was the only man I ever loved. He's the only man I would like to love." He was so lost in explaining his heart that he didn't notice Kamui's dark and pained expression.

The boy knew it. He knew Subaru was special to him. He knew there was something pulling him towards the onmyouji ever since Kamui saw him in that room. Subaru, he knew, was someone who hid so much pain and sadness in his heart that it was breaking the onmyouji so much. He wanted to help the man. He wanted to at least ease the pain and the sadness that was slowly eating Subaru into the dark oblivion. But as it was, he now knew he was just no match for the person that was making Subaru suffer. He was just a kid with nothing but a broken soul for the man. _He was incomplete… _Therefore, he couldn't, and wouldn't, be able to be of any help. And that fact hurt so much. _He was no one in Subaru's life…_

"Kamui?" Subaru called when he noticed that Kamui wasn't listening anymore.

Kamui looked up immediately with a bright smile. "I want to help in getting my feathers… I want to be complete…"

"Wha–?" Subaru was about to ask about it more but Gorou already called their attention and briefed them on what to do. The four and a half of them were closely standing to one another as they listened. Kamui was hugging Mokona so tightly to his chest that the fur ball immediately knew there was something wrong about the boy.

"Kamui?" Mokona whispered. Kamui looked down and saw Mokona's worried face. "Is everything alright?" Kamui looked surprised for a while, but then he immediately recovered and smiled. He nodded as he hugged Mokona tighter.

"Oy, brat. Are you listening?" Fuuma asked beside him. Kamui looked up and saw Fuuma's creased eyebrow. The older male immediately knew the boy wasn't listening to the briefing at all. "That Gorou guy said you're to stay with me as the blonde and the Sakura guy steals the feather. You're to stay here. We'll rendezvous with them after everything is over."

"Eh? We're not going there together?" Kamui asked.

"No, Gorou said it will be too dangerous to bring you there because the feather might react to you. And then the ambush will be all for nothing." Fuuma explained. "And Subaru doesn't want to leave you alone here. So he asked me to watch you."

"There's no need to watch an incomplete person…" Kamui mumbled. He looked down again. Fuuma looked at Mokona, silently asking what was wrong. Mokona answered, also with his eyes, that he didn't know.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren-sama: (*teary-eyed*) Poor Kamui…

Subaru: How insensitive. How can that guy say something like that?

Kamui: (*gloomy*) That's you, you know…

Subaru: I would never say anything like that in front of you.

Kamui: So you'll say something like that behind my back… (*turned more gloomy*)

Subaru: It's all Ren's fault, saying you're incomplete and all.

Ren-sama: Oy, don't blame me. You're the one who said that. And Kamui, no one said you're incomplete. You're the one who told that to yourself.

Yue: (*silently drinking tea without any care about the conversation*)

Subaru: Yue, have you any say about this?

Yue: (*looked at Kamui and then Subaru and then Ren-sama*) I don't really care. But don't worry, boy. I can feel that Subaru is simply covering his perverted acts so he said that.

Kamui and Subaru: (*both blushed*)

Ren-sama: (*chuckled*) Please continue to support "Broken Wings"! And don't forget to review! ˆoˆ


	13. Chapter 13

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Hi, there! I thank you people for the reviews that you gave me! Sorry if the updates are really slow. I have work and it takes priority. But I assure you that I love this fict so much I will never even think of abandoning it. **

**P.S. Yes, I got this idea from the huge bunnies in One Piece. Just think of this Island as some unknown place in the Grand Line.**

**Anyway, here's the next chapter! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 13**

"Oy, Kamui." Fuuma called from behind him. They were back in the room where they slept. Kamui was currently looking outside the window, sitting there silently and watching as the full moon started to bring light to the totally starless sky. He turned his head and looked up at Fuuma when the latter called him. "Is there something wrong? You didn't even say goodbye to Subaru earlier."

Kamui smiled. He's starting to get the hang of it, of fooling other people with his innocent smile. "I already said goodbye a little bit earlier. So I didn't think there was a need to say more. And besides, we will see each other later anyway."

Fuuma creased his eyebrows. He really was too observant to be able to read Kamui's strange behavior. "You have mixed feelings towards that Sakura guy, don't you? You don't like it that he was that guilty about the kiss. You don't like it that he sees you as someone to protect, and not someone he can share his pain and sadness with. You're not happy that he didn't realize he was already hurting you…"

"If you already know that much, then there's no point in answering, right?" Kamui said in an unusually serious tone, which somehow surprised Fuuma. Kamui noticed this and immediately apologized, wearing his usual expression now. "Sorry, I'm just getting impatient."

Fuuma walked towards the boy and sat next to him, also looking outside. "Why?" Mokona also silently hopped on the older male's shoulder to listen. And for the first time, Fuuma didn't mind it.

"I had this really strange dream." Kamui answered truthfully as he sighed. "Fuuma was there… but he's unlike you. There were also others with him. I don't know who those people are, and I have the feeling that I have to remember them. But when I asked Subaru… he evaded the topic and got angry… I want to know who those people are… I want to know who I am… That's all I want…"

"He thinks that you're still not ready to know all about it." Mokona answered before Fuuma could. "Mokona knows too, about your past. But I don't think you're ready to know it."

"You really don't want to know everything, right?" Fuuma asked directly. "You just want to know something. That's why you're so impatient to get your feathers back. Can we know what it is?"

Kamui looked down. He didn't even know why he was feeling like this. It wasn't as if Subaru was neglecting him, but he just couldn't feel right. "I… want to know who Subaru is… I want to know who he is in my life… I want to know everything about him…"

Mokona looked down. That too, he knew. But both Subaru and Kamui would probably be in so much pain if Kamui knew from the fur ball. "I don't think you're ready to know… Subaru is afraid of hurting you. But more than that, he's afraid to hurt himself. He's more fragile and sensitive than you think. And you're also the same…"

"You think I can't handle the truth about me?" Kamui asked miserably. He really wanted to know why they were doing this. He wanted so much to learn who he was and who Subaru was. He didn't know how he got this feeling, or when it started. But ever since he had that dream, he got restless and just couldn't help but want to know everything.

Mokona nodded and gazed at Kamui with a very serious expression. "Because, Kamui, you're the one who wished to break your soul like this."

Kamui's eyes widened at the statement. "I… It's me..?" It shocked him so much that he froze.

"Oy, fur ball!" Fuuma exclaimed. "You and your loud mouth!" He immediately squeezed Mokona the way he usually did, but with more force which could really hurt.

"Mokona thinks that Kamui needs to know that first." Mokona said as he hopped on Kamui's lap after the successful getaway from the tall raven. "If you can't even handle that fact, then you're far from handling the rest of the truth behind your lost of memory and soul."

Kamui looked at Mokona. He couldn't help it. It hurt him so much that his tears started welling up from inside him. It fell on his cheeks one by one in rapid succession. They're hot and they blurred his vision, but he still felt like crying them all out. He didn't know where the tears were coming from, but he just felt so sad right now that it didn't even matter why he was crying.

_So it was him who was causing them this trouble of having to travel in different dimensions… It was his fault…_

"Tch." Fuuma gritted his teeth. "Damn fur ball." Mokona hopped out of the way when Fuuma leaned closer to the boy.

Kamui looked up when Fuuma wiped his tears away gently with big and warm hands. He had never felt Subaru's hands before, so he didn't know how it felt. The onmyouji always wore black gloves and the amethyst-eyed teen had never had the chance to see the other's hands yet. But Fuuma's hands were warm and gentle, and that was enough to calm him down.

"Fuuma…" He mumbled as Fuuma pulled him close and locked him in a warm and gentle embrace. It felt so nice to be hugged by the older male that Kamui hugged him back. He was still slightly sobbing but he knew he was okay now. After all, he wasn't alone. _Fuuma was there with him…_

"Don't be impatient to get your memory back." Fuuma voiced in a low and gentle tone that Kamui had never heard before. He was usually husky and has a tone of annoyance in his voice. The older male stroked Kamui's hair, calming the boy. "It's alright to take our time. You'll eventually remember everything, so there's no need to rush." _Damn that bastard… How could he let a fragile boy such as Kamui cry like this..?_

"Don't worry," Mokona patted Kamui's back. He was back on Fuuma's shoulder again. "Subaru is doing his best to bring your soul pieces back. He will not stop until all thirteen pieces of them are together again."

Kamui looked up at him and smiled, truthfully innocent this time. He liked these two's company. "Fuuma… Can I always come to you when I feel sad..?"

"I don't really mind." Fuuma said before he furrowed his eyebrows. "But… don't you want to tell Subaru your problems first?"

Kamui shook his head. "I don't want to make him worry… He's already doing everything for me… I don't want him to worry about me more than that…"

"Alright." Fuuma said silently. He couldn't help but grit his teeth. _When did this innocent boy lost all his naivety? _"You can always tell me whenever you have any weird dreams or thoughts again. You can cry on my shoulder as well."

"Except you can only measure up to Fuuma's chest. You can't reach his shoulder when you're both standing." Mokona said, which earned him a punch from Fuuma. Kamui also pouted at that statement, but that was really helpful. It blew away all his other worries in an instant. After a while, he was already laughing as he watched Fuuma chase after Mokona in futility.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

"Is there some problems between you and Kamui-san?" Nokoru asked in earnest. He and Subaru were on Gorou's back, on the way to the enemy camp. As the blonde suspected, Subaru didn't answer nor even act like he heard the question. He sighed. "You know, Kamui-san might think that he's not important to you at all. Earlier you said that there's only one person important to you, and that person isn't Kamui-san. Did you see how he reacted?"

That totally caught Subaru's attention. "What do you mean by that?" He didn't know that Nokoru was listening to_ that_.

"He looked so hurt earlier because of your insensitivity. Didn't you realize?" Nokoru was starting to think that Subaru was an utter jerk. "He looked like he wanted to cry, but he still smiled in front of you. Just so you wouldn't get worried."

"But he's the one who asked…" Subaru mumbled. "I only wanted to tell him the truth…"

"Liar." Nokoru said. "You wanted to make it clear to him that your relationship with him is nothing like that at all. And even that kiss had no meaning at all. You wanted him to understand that he is nothing to you."

"Tha–! How dare you!" Subaru snarled. He wanted to kick Nokoru out of the bunny's back, if only they weren't in such an important mission.

"That's what it looked like to the rest of us who heard it." Nokoru continued, not really bothering to hold his tongue anymore. "Kamui-san is a very adorable child. I wish you'd cherish him more. And I don't mean the kind of cherish that you make him feel right now. I mean cherish him from your heart, accept him in your heart."

"You don't know anything and yet you act like you–" Subaru was about to end his sentence quite sharply but Nokoru already cut him even before he could finish.

"That's right, I don't understand." Nokoru said. "I don't understand why you deny yourself of him and why you keep on pushing him away from your heart when he's there and well. Will you only understand how important he is to you if he was gone? Will you only cherish him from the bottom of your heart if he was already dead?"

Subaru immediately snapped at that sentence and slapped Nokoru really hard. "Don't you even talk of Kamui like that!" His voice was starting turn really venomous.

Nokoru smirked as he wiped the blood off the corner of his mouth. "You already felt how it was to long for someone whom you know will never come back. And yet you still have the audacity to push away those you cherish. Kamui-san might hate you one day. He might leave you, you know." Nokoru knew Subaru wouldn't accept his thinking, but he just needed to give it a try. It was the same for him. He didn't realize how important _that _person was to him until the guy was gone. He didn't want Subaru doing the same mistake as he did. The man had already experienced losing someone. Nokoru couldn't understand why the onmyouji didn't want to just cherish Kamui, the present, and kept on clinging to the past, which was his former lover Seishirou.

Subaru gritted his teeth but didn't answer. He knew explaining things to the blonde would get them nowhere because they had different viewpoint. First of all, he didn't like Kamui that way. He only saw Kamui as someone part of his life, that much he would admit to himself. But he still didn't feel anything akin to romantic love towards the boy. Earlier was nothing but a mistake, nothing but a heated error on his part. Nokoru was talking about losing someone and yet he too was clinging to the past by wanting his lover back. _Why couldn't he understand Subaru when they were almost the same, wanting their lover back more than anything? _Subaru still loved Seishirou, very much. And it was all he could do just to keep on living with Kamui in the present and keep his personal chaos second priority. And now the blonde wanted him to just forget everything and love Kamui like nothing happened? _And besides, Kamui would definitely leave him anyway, when the boy learned about everything… about his betrayal… _

"I'll only hurt Kamui." He found himself voicing. Nokoru, who had somehow calmed down, looked at him in concern. "I know and he knows before he lost his memory that I will never love him in the same way as I loved Seishirou. I will always compare them. It will only hurt him to know that he's only second, that he will never get the whole of my heart, just some small part of it, that part that's still functioning. The rest of me had died when I became the Sakurazukamori. Kamui will only be swallowed by the darkness together with me if I give him any hope of love."

Nokoru looked down. He too felt something like that back then. And yet, even when he pushed that person away, that guy still died with much pain in his heart. "Suoh."

Subaru looked at him in curiosity. Nokoru looked at him as well. "Suoh was the name of my lover. I already told you that I am the Leader of the wealthiest company in our dimension, right?" He looked forward, breaking their eye contact. "There was this guy I really like, named Suoh. Of course, I didn't tell him about my feelings because he was merely an ordinary student, and I am one of the Leaders in the country. But then we still got together. He worked for me when he graduated, and I learned of his feelings. We started going out, but in secret because I fear that his life will be in danger if someone ever knew of our relationship. But even in secrecy, I still fear that we will be discovered by someone else. I started to turn colder and colder and then we broke up. Of course, I thought I could forget him if I want. I don't want him to see my dark side too, that's why I hurt him and hurt him until he completely broke apart because of me. And yet, he still died for me…"

He clutched his fists tightly. "I'm sorry if I thought our situation might be the same. I just don't want Kamui-san to be hurt… I just don't want to see you two hurting each other just to protect yourselves. Kamui is already hurting deeply. I just feel that you should be a bit more responsible in your actions… Sorry again…"

"You mean if I don't want him to love me, I should just treat him like everybody else?" Subaru asked. Nokoru looked at him in surprise. That's not what he meant. "I know. I think I'll just do that."

"Wait, Subaru-san! That's not what I–!" Nokoru's voice was cut off by Gorou when the latter hushed them. They were all in some dark areas behind the cottony sweet bushes and trees.

"You two go and get the feather. We'll go and ambush them from here." Gorou said. In front of them was a community with houses made from cottons and chocolates.

"Are you going to kill them all?" Nokoru asked. He wasn't the sympathetic type of person but he still didn't want to just let anyone simply and needlessly killing some innocent children, even if those children were all bunnies.

"Of course not! Are you an idiot?" Kira exclaimed beside Gorou. "We, just like the Choco Bunnies, don't fight to kill. We fight to destroy each other's morale and dignity."

Nokoru smiled at that. "Alright, good luck in your fight." He and Subaru went the opposite direction and the rest of the rabbits went another direction.

"Kamui's feather is in that temple." Subaru said after a while, looking at a lone temple just some twenty-five to thirty meters away from them. He could feel Kamui's power emanating from it. Somehow, it felt different from the first three feathers that Kamui had. It had a serene aura and it was soothing to the feeling. There were houses everywhere but the temple stood alone in the farthest part of the community, it also looked so highly guarded that Subaru and Nokoru stopped approaching after some fifteen meters. There were a lot of guards who were chatting idly or taking a walk together with their buddies.

After some more minutes, everyone was already in chaos because of the surprise attack. The guards were immediately on the lookout and some were already running toward the commotion. There were at least five guards who were left, and Subaru knew he could already handle them alone. But before he could even go out of his hiding place, Nokoru was already there. The blonde was just too fast for an ordinary Leader. The blonde was able to fight the five bunnies with just his fighting skills. Instead of feeling reassured, that somehow brought upon doubt in Subaru's mind. _Nokoru said he was a Leader of a company. But why did he look as strong as Kamui? Who was he?_

Nokoru saw his suspicious stare but merely smiled in return. "Don't doubt me too much, or we'll end up having suspicions about one another throughout this whole journey."

Subaru ignored him and gracefully dashed inside the dark temple. They were met by eerie silence, and before Subaru realized it, he was already alone, feeling nobody else's presence but his.

"Imonoyama?" He called quietly, but no one answered. "Tch." He continued walking inside until he felt some déjà vu. It felt just like when he was inside the Seireitei palace, where he first met the Kamui without any memory.

He continued walking forward, feeling nothing but the ground. He could feel no walls or anything that might trip him or even any other living soul. It didn't bother him much because, somehow, he could feel Kamui's power nearby, and it was making him calm down. It's the same as if Kamui was beside him.

He closed his eyes to feel more of the feather's presence. _Kamui's presence…_

And before he knew it, Kamui was already really beside him. Subaru was so shocked to see Kamui walking beside him that he immediately backed away from the boy.

"Kamui?" He asked, totally doubting his eyes. He knew Kamui was supposed to be with Fuuma right now, so who was this boy?

"You… don't know me, do you?" Kamui said, having that familiar smirk that he used to wear in front of the Seals. "But I know you, Subaru Sumeragi, the one who broke me."

Subaru's eyes widened at the intensity of the words. Kamui's amethyst eyes felt like they were glowing crimson. _And they were very cold. _They had hatred in them, deep unfathomable hatred. "Kamui…" He tried to get closer but Kamui stepped back.

"What's the use of coming closer if you'll only step back again once I decided to go near you?" Kamui asked while wearing his sadistic grin. "You… You're really bringing me on the brink of insanity, Subaru… I thought that if I lost my memories, I will be able to feel your love more… But I was wrong. You would go and hug me and then at the same time push me away after you're finished calming yourself down."

"No… That's…" Subaru wanted to explain, wanted to explain what he just explained Nokoru earlier. But Kamui wasn't the type who'd listen.

"Subaru… you're such a big coward. If you want me, then just take me. If you don't want me, then just kill me with your own hands. You're the Sakurazukamori after all. It'll be so easy for you to do that."

"Shut up!" Subaru yelled. "You're not Kamui! Kamui would never–!"

"Do you even know what Kamui wished before he jumped out of that window that fateful day?" Kamui asked with a grin when he saw Subaru's stunned expression. "He wished that Subaru, no, that the Sakurazukamori, will go back to him, and give him the final blow."

Subaru felt like it was getting hard to breath. It felt like everything was suffocating him, the words that Kamui was saying were like thorns that kept on slithering his heart over and over again, wounding a wound deeper and deeper, until it totally shattered him. He clutched his ears, wanting to just make the words go away.

"Kamui's wish is really for you to just kill him." Kamui said as he chuckled darkly.

"No… you're not Kamui…" Subaru mumbled, trying his best to maintain his sanity. Even if this person wasn't Kamui, he still felt like the real one. But Subaru knew too that this Kamui wasn't the feather he kept on feeling earlier. _This person naming himself Kamui was a different entity…_

"I am Kamui." Kamui whispered beside Subaru's ear. "I believe we'll see each other again, Subaru." Subaru looked up and saw Kamui starting to disappear. He initially wanted to stop Kamui from disappearing but he knew this person wasn't really the feather so he just stared at the disappearing figure. "Ah, Subaru, don't you know how I like the feeling of disappearing so much? And I know you think it's good that I'm disappearing, because I will not bother you anymore…" Subaru didn't answer, knowing full well that what Kamui said was true.

"But you'll want to find me, Subaru. You'll run and run and run after me. But you'll still never catch me with those half-hearted feelings of yours, Subaru…" Kamui smirked again. "You… will beat yourself up after this, not seizing the opportunity to capture me, the _Core._" Kamui's smirk widened just as Subaru's mismatched eyes did. The boy immediately vanished after that.

Subaru was left feeling so utterly lost, wide-eyed and staring at the darkness where Kamui disappeared from. "The… _Core? _You say..?"

As if on cue, everything went back, the lights, the sound, the presence of everybody else running wild and amok outside, and also the presence of his companion.

"Oy, Subaru!" Nokoru tried to shake his shoulder. "What happened? You suddenly decided to ignore me and just stare off into empty space."

Subaru looked at him in half anger and half frustrated expression. "The core… The core was here… And I… I let it get away…"

"The core?" Nokoru asked. "I… didn't see anything though… You were merely standing here, wide-eyed and everything while I fought off the Choco Bunnies that tried to attack us…"

Subaru looked down on his hands, clutching his fists tightly.

"_Kamui's wish is really for you to just kill him."_

"_But you'll want to find me, Subaru. You'll run and run and run after me. But you'll still never catch me with those half-hearted feelings of yours, Subaru…"_

He looked forward with so much fire and determination in his deadly mismatched eyes. "I'll definitely find you. I'll definitely catch you, Kamui."

Nokoru blinked in surprise because of Subaru's words. "I didn't think the core would show itself so soon… Okay… Let's go look for the feather now, shall we?"

Subaru started running and Nokoru sighed before he followed the other male. They went some flight of stairs, turning from corner to corner, until they reached an old-looking altar where a feather was placed so honorably.

"Kamui…" Subaru looked at the feather as if longing for the real person. He could still feel his chest ache for some unknown reason.

"Shall we get this feather now so we can go back to Kamui and the others?" Nokoru asked. Subaru nodded before they decided to get the feather and went out of the place.

Outside, almost everything was still in chaos. The Choco Bunnies were putting up a good fight, but the Candy Bunnies were far better than the former. And soon, the fight came to an end with the Candy Bunnies winning against them. Of course, seeing as they were starting to lose, the Choco Bunnies' morale started to deplete, until it totally went dark when they heard the news that their God was stolen.

They all felt really weak and the Candy Bunnies were able to take over their lands and properties that night. Subaru and Nokoru ran to where they were supposed to rendezvous with Fuuma and Kamui.

Kamui and Fuuma were sitting side by side and having a nice chat with one another. They both stood up when they saw Subaru and Nokoru approaching. Kamui looked at Fuuma before he gave a tentative smile towards the onmyouji and towards Nokoru. Subaru didn't move any closer nor did he smile back. Nokoru had to get the feather from his hand and give it to Kamui, who merely looked at it.

He then looked at Subaru. "Subaru… Are you angry at me?"

Subaru averted his gaze, not bothering to answer. _"Kamui's wish is really for you to just kill him." _The statement echoed deeply in his mind and heart that he couldn't bear to look at Kamui or even hear the boy's voice right now.

Kamui looked down as he accepted the feather. He felt so miserable. One second Subaru was all a worrywart and another he was totally being ignored. He couldn't take it. Subaru wouldn't even look at him, nor answer to his call. He couldn't bear it, the pain and the anguish that was slowly eating him from the inside.

Nokoru saw those feelings in his amethyst eyes and the blonde immediately hugged Kamui. "It's alright, Kamui-san. Just put the feather on your chest and you'll feel warmer and happier." He returned Nokoru's smile, but his had lost his earlier innocence. Mokona's ears drooped when he saw that.

Kamui put the feather near his chest and it was swallowed immediately by his body, creating a blinding light as his wings appeared once more. They looked much bigger now than they first appeared. He also didn't feel as lightheaded as when he first absorbed them.

From there, they all saw how the chocolate mountains and rivers turned back to being how it was. Everything turned to the green sceneries, much to their relief. The candies and bubble gums and even the cotton candies vanished and was replaced by natural leaves and stones and grasses. The air still smelled sweet but the sweets themselves had already vanished.

"Feeling better?" Nokoru asked, Kamui smiled and nodded, a lie. All of them knew that by now. He didn't feel any better at all. Of course, it felt nice for his body but his heart remained in pain. The happiness was momentary because all it had to do to make him remember everything was look at Subaru's indifferent expression.

.

~tbc~

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**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: (*in a corner; with black smoke coming out of nowhere*)

Ren-sama: I really don't think we should have a Ren-sama's Corner right now…

Yue: (*drinking tea; has an uncaring expression*) Why?

Ren-sama: Kamui is so depressed, and Subaru is nowhere to be found…

Yue: Isn't that all your fault?

Ren-sama: (*teary-eyed*) Of course not! Why would I make them so miserable like this? I'm not that bad of a person… Why would they need to behave like that towards each other anyway..?

Yue: It's no use explaining huh… (*just continued drinking tea*)

Ren-sama: Anyway, please review!

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Subaru: (*somewhere hidden; mumbling*) How can he be so clingy to that bastard..? I don't understand at all…


	14. Chapter 14

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Yep, thank you for your continuous reviews and support, people! I really, really appreciate that! Here's the nect chapter! I hope you enjoy this too!**

**.**

**Chapter 14**

They traveled different dimensions, met different places and traditions, but still there was no sight or presence of the feathers.

They arrived at the Grand Castle of Far, Far Away. But there was neither people there nor even a single feather. Then they went into a grassland filled with giant and colorful mushrooms, but there were no feathers there either. They went to the Hidden Village of Mist, but there was only war going on and they weren't even able to look at the area fully. They went to a place named Clidoren and met two brothers that looked exactly like Kamui and Subaru, but those people also didn't know anything about the feathers.

And all those times that they traveled, Subaru ignored Kamui, if not entirely trying to erase his intoxicating presence. In his head he imagined himself comforting the amethyst boy, hugging him, and wiping the pain off of those beautiful eyes. But in reality, he could only stare, pretend he's indifferent, and hurt a ton inside.

_He mustn't get used to it… He needed to break their bond as early as possible… or it would only break them both in the end…_

Inside him though, he knew it was already to late… the pain he kept on feeling every time he had to ignore the other teen was more than enough to drown him…_ and yet, he still had to do it…_

They arrived at a meadow where stood a lone, huge Sakura tree, much like the Sakura of the Sakurazukamori. But this one was different. This one emitted a good aura.

Subaru was surprised when Kamui tugged at the sleeves of his trench coat. He looked down and met silently pleading amethyst eyes. Nokoru and Fuuma watched the two of them from afar as to not get in the way.

"What?" Subaru's gaze was too cold and his voice was too icy that Kamui felt like crying. He felt his chest shattered a little bit more with every breath that he took. It felt like the air was filled with knives trying to cut him really deep. But still, he had to keep on breathing… if only to ease Subaru's pain…

"I… You… You don't have to avoid me anymore…" Kamui voiced, looking down. He couldn't take the gaze Subaru was throwing at him, but he knew what he needed to do. If he's the reason why Subaru was hurting, then he just needed to get away, right?

Subaru's brow creased. He didn't know what Kamui was planning to say, but if it meant that Kamui wanted to be clingy again, then he'd stop it. He'd repeatedly reject Kamui until the boy wouldn't need him anymore. "What?" He repeated, colder than earlier.

"I… If… If you don't like me that much… If you hate me that much… you should've said so… I… I wouldn't have bothered you right from the start…" Kamui was starting to lose his composure. He was sure Subaru would notice that he's trembling, so immediately let go of the older man's coat and ran to where Fuuma was.

Fuuma glanced at Subaru's shocked expression before he turned to Kamui and patted the boy's head. The boy smiled at him sweetly, and he returned it. _That Sakura bastard didn't have any right to hurt this boy… He would make sure that Subaru wouldn't be able to hurt him anymore…_

Subaru was too shocked to even react. _No… he didn't hate Kamui… How could he hate Kamui when the boy was like a drug to him..? And what did those words mean..? Did that mean Kamui wouldn't talk to him again..? Wouldn't smile at him again..?_

Wait, wasn't that what he wanted right from the start? Didn't he plan on rejecting Kamui again? But now that Kamui seemed to have given it to him… _Why did it feel like he was on the verge of dying..? Why did it feel so hard to breathe..? Why did it feel like his heart had shattered once more..?_

He blinked when he found himself in the dark. Then he heard an eerie laughter right beside him.

"K-Kamui..?" He turned around and saw the Kamui that had been haunting his dreams for a while now. This was the second time he met this Kamui, and yet he still couldn't find his composure at the sight of the gorgeous teen with cold demeanor and eyes full of hatred.

"You're too stubborn for your own good, Subaru. Sooner or later someone will definitely go and snatch him away from you…" Kamui's intimidating amethyst eyes were gleaming in the darkness. They were so unlike the innocent eyes that Kamui had now. It was also a bit different from the eyes of the Kamui that he knew, the Kamui who fought against Fuuma. That Kamui was still innocent even if he was repeatedly shattered by his destiny. This one's eyes had pure, sadistic gleam.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Subaru merely said. He didn't know what to say. _What if someone were to really steal Kamui..? It's not as if Kamui was his to begin with… It's not as if he liked, or loved Kamui that way… But he still couldn't imagine the boy clinging to someone else… _

_He knew he wouldn't be able to stay sane if he ever witnessed that kind of scene…_

To his surprise, Kamui laughed again, though all amusement gone. "I hate you, Subaru… And I'll make sure to make Kamui hate you too… Then you'll find yourself shattering because of your own stupidity, Sakurazukamori."

Subaru was about to speak again when he almost jumped from receiving a pat on his shoulder. "Are you alright, Subaru-san?" He blinked. He was back in the meadow again, and Nokoru was eyeing him worriedly.

"Yes, I'm fine." He answered, still greatly disturbed. He looked at how Kamui smiled at Fuuma and Mokona. _That dark Kamui would make this Kamui hate him, too huh… But wasn't that what he wanted right from the start? For Kamui to hate him..? _But he knew better than that… He knew that deep inside him, he didn't want Kamui to hate him… He'd really break if that ever happened…

"You know, you shouldn't treat Kamui like that." For a second Subaru thought the dark Kamui was back, but he found Nokoru saying the words. "He'll end up hating you, you know…"

They were cut by Mokona's obviously excited yell. "Kamui's feather!" He sensed the presence when the wind blew towards them. Subaru knew the fur ball was right because he felt its presence too. _The all too familiar warmth…_

Kamui approached the tree, all the while marveling at its grandness even in solitude. From under its magnificent shade, he looked at it from below and found himself in awe. The tree felt very soothing, very serene, and very protective towards him. And he couldn't help but admire it even more.

When he touched its robust trunk, however, the tree slightly swayed and the luscious pink petals covering its entirety turned into a darker shade just as a light appeared from where he's touching. His companions looked alarmed for a while, until they saw a feather emerging from the tree's trunk. It went straight to Kamui's chest like it was pulled by an immense force. They all stood in deep awe as Kamui's whole body lit up and huge wings appeared from his back at the return of a piece of his soul. After a while, the wings vanished, leaving glowing particles that looked a lot like small firefly lights, making them all feel deep wonder.

The tree remained glowing, however. And what Kamui thought to be a light from the earlier feather turned out to be a one-time portal which immediately pulled him in. And in the next second, he found himself alone in an entirely different world, only the echoes of his companions' screams could be heard in the distance.

He stood up, realizing he was sitting on the grass. The tree was nowhere to be found and he instead saw himself in the middle of a clearing of a foreign forest. There were huge flowers everywhere, and Kamui noticed that they had faces.

"Oh my, what a beautiful boy!" One of the flower exclaimed upon seeing him, and all of the other flowers also gawked at him.

"Can I touch him? Can I? Can I?" The huge Dandelion asked, but her leaf was smacked by the Sunflower's.

"Who are you, little boy?" Tulip asked, towering over Kamui who could do nothing but gaped at them. He was really a little boy in comparison to their sizes. They were twice as huge as Fuuma and Kamui was kind of hoping they weren't man-eating flowers.

"K-Kamui." He answered, a little embarrassed that he was stuttering.

The flowers' laughter echoed throughout the distance, making Kamui more embarrassed.

"No need to be embarrassed or scared, boy." A pink Carnation flirted as she brushed Kamui's hair with her leaf. "We won't eat you."

"So, Kamui, huh… Where are you from? And why are you here?" The white Rose voiced, looking more beautiful and pure than the others.

"I… don't know where I came from… Where is this place..?" Kamui asked, feeling a little stupid for not knowing where he came from.

"Oh, an amnesiac." The pink Carnation whispered to the beige one and the others too whispered things with their own companions.

"This is the Flower Garden, the most beautiful garden in this entire forest." The Sunflower said with pride, though her face fell after a while. "But don't go anywhere near the ravine. It is rumored that a ravenous beast lives there."

"A flower-eating beast lives there, to be exact." Tulip voiced, a little sad. "Our Queen was taken into the ravine… We don't even know if she's still alive…"

"The ravine?" Kamui asked, and he looked at the deep forest nearby just as they pointed the way. "Do you mind if I look?" The flower all gaped at him. They all just said that it was dangerous, and yet the first thing the boy wanted was to have a look? "Don't worry, I'll be back." He smiled at them just to reassure them.

"Ohh…" The flowers voiced in unison just as he sprinted towards the ravine. The boy left them in deep awe and admiration.

"He was such a sweet little boy…" The pink Carnation sighed. "I hope he'll be alright." The other flowers all nodded their assent.

Kamui ran to the forest, but the said ravine wasn't that far for he could see the edge of the forest because of the light. He ran towards it and stopped when he found himself face to face with a shallow cliff. His eyes scanned the area and saw that a ravine was far down the cliff, where a dangerous-looking dog was sleeping. _No, it wasn't a dog… A wolf..? Not exactly…_

Kamui didn't know he could jump the cliff, but he did. And he was somehow amazed at himself for that. _It must've been his habit back when he still had his memory… _He also noticed how he could walk without making a sound, or so he thought because the beast wasn't waking up.

Finally, what he saw as a dog could be anything but a dog. It had silky, almost glowing, fur as bluish-white as snow. And its huge, powerful limbs were stretched incredibly. Its paws were a shade of pink, which was a bit like Mokona's. Kamui walked towards it and realized that the dog when standing would at least be as tall as the flowers. He walked passed it and found a huge red Rose in full bloom. She was planted in a huge mound and was sleeping too. He walked near her and once again found himself in deep awe as he gazed upon her beauty. _She must be the Queen … Was this the reason why the dog, for lack of a better term, kidnapped her?_

Kamui touched her leaf, for he couldn't reach the dark crimson petals, and immediately regretted his actions because the Rose immediately woke up and screamed at the top of her lungs at the sight of him.

"No, no! Shh!" Kamui hushed her, and she calmed down. But it was all too late. He heard a loud growl from behind him and jumped just before the dog's teeth gnawed at the spot where he was a second ago.

"No, Please! Shiro-san! Stop!" The Rose begged, and only then did the dog stop trying to rip Kamui off of his territory. Kamui was thankful because he was not used to doing such tiring things such as jumping out of harm's way and was already a little bit out of breath.

The dog named Shiro gave one last growl before he sat beside the Rose, visibly protecting her and was in the mood for an attack in case Kamui step closer. The boy wasn't as naïve as he used to be and he knew there was no way he'd go closer even if the dog gave him candies.

"Who are you, insolent wretch?" The dog barked. "You dare step in my territory without my permission!" Kamui blinked at him when the dog suddenly talked in its raspy male voice.

"My name is Kamui Shirou." Kamui answered when he recovered, bowing a little, before he looked at the dog straight in the eyes. The dog had beautiful but sharp mismatched jade blue left eye and golden right eye. They were beautiful enough that Kamui's face softened as he stared at them. _Just like Subaru's…_

The dog's eyebrow twitched at the similarity of their name. "What are you staring at, you lowly scum?" Shiro asked again, though not with much hostility as earlier.

"I… just find your eyes… beautiful…" Kamui smiled. If he was the same as he was before he lost his memory, he would've insulted the dog just to hide his embarrassment. But now, even when he felt his cheeks slightly flushed at the words, he still didn't regret saying them.

The dog gazed at him for a while, trying to discern any hint of a lie. But Kamui was saying the truth. That much he knew. Meanwhile, Queen Rose couldn't help but chuckle at the sudden compliment.

"So, why are you here, little boy?" She asked when both Kamui and Shiro turned to him.

"Uh, I met Sunflower-san and the others. They are very worried about their Queen who was kidnapped by the Flower-eating Beast." He answered, knowing lying would get him nowhere. The dog turned to him sharply and with so much hatred, until Kamui added. "But I don't' see any flower-eating beast anywhere here…"

Rose chuckled again. "I see. They must've been worried…" Shiro glanced at her before he went back to his sleep. Kamui watched him until Shiro was a little far from them. "Don't worry, he was just shy."

Kamui looked at the Rose like she suddenly turned into a tulip. _The dog was shy?! He was almost killed by that dog, and he was just shy?!_

Rose, sensing the incredulity in Kamui's gaze, chuckled again. "I was not kidnapped by Shiro-san… I planted myself here on my own account." She looked at Kamui again. "You see, Shiro-san is the King of this part of the forest and I was the Queen of the upper part. Everything was peaceful, until Shiro-san's wife died. He was so heartbroken that the least he wanted was a flower on her grave."

Kamui looked at the mound and realized where the conversation was going. Rose nodded, seeing the understanding on the boy's face. "Yes, he was looking for the most beautiful flower to put on her grave. But he couldn't find anything that would crown her as his Queen, even on the grave. Then he went to the upper part of the forest and picked some flowers there… He planted them here, but after a while, they would die because they weren't that strong to live without the sunlight. I felt that it's my responsibility to stop Shiro-san from needlessly searching for an appropriate flower and volunteered."

"Do the other flowers know?" Kamui asked though he already knew the answer.

Rose shook her head. "They don't. I know they would've done everything to stop me. But I was compelled to help the poor King… so I made my decision and planted myself here."

"I see…" Kamui looked down, only to look up again as he felt something very familiar.

"What's wrong, boy?" The Rose asked, a little surprised at Kamui's sudden change in expression.

"Fea… ther…" He mumbled as he felt the warmth of the feather enveloping him. Shiro immediately woke when he felt the aura, and the Queen looked as shocked as the dog when the mound suddenly glowed together with Kamui. The boy felt his wings grew again, this time bigger, before a feather appeared from the mound.

"My… wife..?" Shiro uttered in disbelief. He knew the presence was of his wife. _So why the hell was his wife merging with that stranger..?_

The feather immediately pushed itself inside Kamui's chest like a magnet even before Shiro could do anything. When the light vanished and Kamui opened his eyes again, he found himself face to face with an angry dog seething with the urge to bite him to death.

"Explain." Shiro growled. He was not in any mood for beating around the bush. He wanted to know what the boy did to his dead wife, and he wanted to know it now. Kamui only looked at him, as if in a trance, before the boy blinked and lost consciousness in front of the dog.

"Oy, wake up! What did you do to my wife!?" Shiro barked angrily, shaking the boy with all his might. Rose feared that Shiro might break Kamui so she immediately pulled herself from the now plain soil. There was no mound anymore.

"Wait, Shiro-san!" Rose immediately pulled Kamui from his clutch and stood in between them. "I think it was right to say that your wife did something to the boy. Kamui-san also did not expect what happened. I saw the deep surprise in his eyes just before he was lost in the sea of light."

"What do you mean by that?" Shiro asked, deeply annoyed that the flower was siding with the brat. "Are you saying my wife was at fault here?"

"No, I'm merely saying–" But she was cut off by a tug at her leaf. Kamui was already awake, or was forcefully awakened by Shiro's loud growls.

"I'll explain." Kamui sat, still feeling a little bit dizzy. That feather must have been really powerful for him to lose his consciousness like that. Shiro flipped his gorgeous tail impatiently as he waited for the explanation. "I believe your wife was born because of my feather. Or at least that's what my deduction tells me…"

"Explain in a way we can understand." Shiro growled again. Kamui sighed before he started telling the two about his quest to find his missing soul pieces. He told them that he didn't have any memories of it but his companions said he was the one who wanted to break his soul like that. And now he was together with his companions, searching different dimensions to complete himself again.

"Why did you think that she was your feather?" Rose asked, and elaborated when Kamui only blinked at her. "I mean, it would've made more sense to say that she has your feather right before she died, right?"

"Yes, that can also be the case." Kamui answered before he looked at the mound, or at least where the mound used to be.

"Her whole body turned back into a feather and entered you?" Shiro asked, pain written all over his face. "You mean my wife, the wife I loved all my life, was just a broken piece of your soul..? She was nothing but a broken piece of you..?"

Kamui looked down. He didn't need to answer that. But he knew Shiro would be left in so much anguish if he didn't try to explain what he thought about it. "I think… even if she was a piece of my soul, she still lived as your wife and loved you while she's alive. You don't need to put her existence down as a mere broken piece of me."

Shiro turned quiet. He loved his wife so much, and now who would he love? He would be alone again. Rose would have no reason to stay with him anymore.

"What do you want to do now?" Rose asked the two of them. She wanted to return to her dear flowers soon, but she knew she just couldn't leave Shiro alone here.

"I…" Shiro didn't know if what he'd say would be the best. "I want to be with my wife…" Kamui blinked, just as Rose slightly gaped. "I didn't mean I want to die too…" He looked at Kamui. "Can I stay… with my wife..?"

"You mean you want to travel with me… whom where your wife's soul is?" Kamui asked, uncertain if he was right with his assumption. Shiro nodded. _Right… How could he travel with a dog twice as big as him?_

"I'm a Kodan. I find this feeling that you look at me like a dog. So I just want to make that clear." Shiro cleared his throat. "And if you think I'll just be a nuisance, you can reject it. I don't mind."

Kamui quickly shook his head before he could think otherwise. _Well, there's no use crying over spilled milk… _"You can come with me… but do you think you can do something about your… uh… height..?"

"You don't mind me coming with you..?" Shiro asked, a little surprised. He was half-expecting the boy to say he was not needed and that he would just get in the way. Or that he would scare away the other feathers…

Kamui smiled at him and tentatively touched his fur, afraid that the kodan would reject his hand. Shiro didn't flinch so he continued brushing the silky fur with his hand. The dog, no, the kodan, closed its eyes and its size reduced to at least a normal St. Bernard size.

"That's better." Shiro voiced as he felt himself shrink in size. He didn't know how but he realized he was fond of the sweet boy, especially when Kamui said his eyes were beautiful. Everyone was scared of him and his mismatched eyes. The only ones who said they were beautiful were his late wife and then Queen Rose, and now, Kamui. He nuzzled Kamui and the boy chuckled as he petted Shiro. Rose too chuckled softly as she saw Kamui and Shiro glowing again.

"I guess it's time to say goodbye, Shiro-san, Kamui-san." She spoke. Kamui and Shiro had only time to glance at her before they were pulled outside the tree again. He was kneeling on one knee while Shiro sat so close to him.

Nokoru, Fuuma, and even Subaru looked shocked to find Kamui together with someone else they didn't know. Mokona was the first to break the silence.

"Kamui!" He exclaimed delightedly as he jumped on Kamui's shoulder and nuzzled his cheek. Kamui chuckled again as he stood up and greeted everyone, except Subaru.

He walked passed the onmyouji as if he didn't exist and immediately hugged Nokoru and Fuuma, who was more than a little surprised, but still hugged him back.

.

~tbc~

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**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren-sama: Whew…

Yue: (*drinks his tea*) I don't think you should be sighing with relief. The main casts are all in turmoil.

Ren-sama: (*too relaxed*) You worry too much, Yue. Everything will be fine!

Yue: (*a little sad*) I believe the main Host Hideki is coming back again. This might be the last time I'll be appearing here.

Ren-sama: I don't mind having two hosts.

Yue: (*relaxed again*) Oh, then serve me more tea, will you?

Ren-sama: (*sweatdrop*) He's back to his old self! Oh, well. Please review! Until next time! ˆoˆ

Kamui: I can't believe my soul piece already has a husband… And now I found myself a new pet…

Subaru: (*too shocked at the incidents to even talk*) (*still replaying in his mind over and over again the way Kamui ignored his presence*)


	15. Chapter 15

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**OTL. I really thank all those who continue to support and review this fict! Please receive my heartfelt gratitude! Anyway, the next chapter is here! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 15**

Kamui walked passed the onmyouji as if he didn't exist and immediately hugged Nokoru and Fuuma, who was more than a little surprised, but still hugged him back.

"Where've you been? We've been worried about you!" Nokoru hugged him tight. "Do you know we've been waiting here for almost two days now?"

"Eh?" Kamui looked at him, a little surprised. He was sure he was just out for an hour, almost.

"Do you know we almost rip that tree off its roots just to turn it upside down and know if you're inside?" Fuuma scratched his head, obviously annoyed at the memory.

"Sorry about that." Kamui chuckled. "Oh, by the way." He looked at Shiro, who was still quietly looking at them, and approached the kodan. "This is Shiro. Can he be our new companion?"

Shiro looked at the companions of his new friend and immediately knew the reason why Kamui was not afraid of him at all. There was a magical being who looked like a fur ball. There were three obviously powerful humans – not that Kamui wasn't powerful at all. And the most striking surprise he had was the fact that a raven-haired guy whom Kamui ignored just a little while ago also had mismatched eyes, one a dark hue of gray and another a bright emerald.

Fuuma and Nokoru both looked at each other before they turned to Mokona. They were sure they couldn't just bring anyone along without proper compensation.

Mokona grinned. "I'll let her talk to you personally."

"'Her'?" Fuuma asked, brow twitching slightly, knowing full well who the fur ball was talking about.

And just as everyone suspected, the stone on Mokona's forehead glowed considerably until a screen appeared before them. After some seconds, Yuuko appeared on the other side.

"Hello there, everyone. Enjoying so far?" She asked in amusement.

"Hell no if you're the one asking." Fuuma answered gruffly. He only received a chuckle from the witch.

"So, what kind of destructive news will you bring this time?" Nokoru asked in amusement. Once again, Yuuko chuckled before looking at him knowingly.

"First things first." Yuuko said as she gulped from a bottle with a character of 'sake' on it. "Shiro, the King of Eternal Forest, can travel together with you because he gave his wife as compensation. Right, Kamui?"

They all looked at the kodan as if he was the most cold-hearted dog they'd ever seen. But Kamui immediately covered for his new friend. "Shiro didn't want to give me his wife… It just so happened that his wife is a part of my soul. That's why he wants to travel with us… He wants to be with his wife…"

"Meaning, you?" Mokona asked with creased eyebrow. Kamui's eyes widened as he felt himself blushing. Now that he thought about it, Shiro's wife was a part of him. Did that mean he was partly Shiro's wife? He immediately shook his head.

Yuuko laughed from the screen. "I didn't think I'd see the day when The Kamui blushes while trying to hide the fact that he already has a husband. And a Kodan at that."

"You know me?" Shiro asked the witch, not really into the joke. He didn't want to further embarrass the boy so he chose to change the topic.

Yuuko nodded. "The King of Eternal Forest, the most powerful Kodan, Shiro. I, the witch of Dimensions, am honored to meet you." She gave a small bow which made Fuuma and the others gaped. _For even Yuuko to give him too much acknowledgement, the dog was that important?_

Kamui chuckled as he petted the dog's head. "It's great that you can travel with us." Shiro closed his eyes and smiled as he leaned on Kamui's side, nuzzling against him.

Subaru looked down on his feet. _He really was an idiot. If he would be this depressed just because a dog took his place, then he shouldn't have ignored Kamui in the first place… But it's far too late now… Kamui didn't even greet him even though he was so worried…_

He closed his eyes as he tried to picture Kamui walking towards him. He would've patted his head and told the boy he shouldn't have gone on his own like that, making everyone worry. And yet, he knew he wouldn't be able to voice that anymore… _He was not needed by Kamui anymore… _And the pain that threatened to swallow him was so deep he thought he'd lose his consciousness._ And from that, he knew he wouldn't be able to get away from the boy anymore… It's the same as dying for him now…_

He opened his eyes and once again found himself in the middle of utter darkness. His first reaction was to try and find Kamui, the dark Kamui. He knew the other male must be lurking here somewhere.

"Looking for me?" Kamui whispered just beside his ear, making his whole body shiver. The onmyouji immediately clutched his sensitive, already red ear and jerked away from the voice. Kamui stood laughing at his actions. "You're really pathetic, Subaru!"

Subaru could do nothing but glare at him. He knew the boy was right anyway. "What do you want now?" He snarled.

"Just so I'll tell you…" Kamui voiced in his sweet innocent tone, making Subaru's expression even more pained. "They're coming… They will take Kamui away… Be careful, Sakurazukamori…" He grinned, obviously hoping for the opposite.

"They?" Subaru looked at the boy with utter confusion. "What do you mean? Kamui!" He shouted when the boy was about to run off.

"Kamui!" He shouted again when Kamui vanished, only to embarrass himself in front of everybody. Nokoru and Fuuma who were petting Shiro looked at him in surprise. Yuuko, the only one who knew the situation, was stifling a laugh and Kamui…

Subaru immediately realized he kind of shouted the boy's name with so much force that even Kamui, who was ignoring him for a while now, was looking at him with a shocked expression. It was kind of cute really, if only it wasn't because of him embarrassing himself like that.

He immediately cleared his throat, as if by doing so would erase their memory of what he'd just done. Yuuko couldn't help but laugh out loud at that. She immediately received a death glare from the blushing Sakurazukamori and her laughter rang even more.

"S-So, what do you want to talk to us about?" Kamui was the one who tried to take Yuuko's attention away from Subaru. He didn't want the man to hate him even more for embarrassing him. _And besides, he didn't anyone laughing at Subaru…_

Yuuko sensed the amethyst-eyed teen's concern and silently admitted her defeat. "Let's get serious then." They all looked at her seriously, as if expecting her to tell something about the end of the world… again.

"Actually, the core is near." She started, making Subaru jolt from his position. "Subaru already saw him thrice now. He'll probably be the one who can explain things better. And… I told you there's a group that wants to get your feathers, right?"

"More specifically, it was Yasha and Ashura who told us." Fuuma answered, and he immediately received an elbow nudge on the side from Nokoru.

Yuuko ignored his comment. "What I'm saying is, this group already obtained three of your feathers, Kamui. I still don't know their aim, but I'm sure they are just a little around the corner from finding you."

"I knew it. Every time she appears, she brings with her news about the end of the world." Fuuma said and Nokoru sighed.

"One more thing." Yuuko added. "The name of their group is Clamp. There are six members and… and their Leader… is Kamui."

Kamui looked at him, confused. Everyone was. Subaru looked in between Yuuko and Kamui just to prove his confusion.

"Let me explain clearly." Yuuko said. She knew it wouldn't be this easy. "I don't mean Kamui as in The Kamui that stands before you now. I mean the other Kamui, the one who resides in his core, the one who wants to disappear so much. That Kamui is also the one who wants to destroy the world, the one who hates everything…"

"You mean his Twin Star?" Subaru asked for the first time. He couldn't believe that the other Kamui would still be alive.

"Not exactly. Fuuma is already dead." Yuuko said as if discussing about the bottle of sake in her hand. "It's still basically Kamui, but the dark one. Kamui, as you know, can also be the Leader of the Dragons of Earth of he only chose to. And that darkness is still within him as he continued to live after the Promised Day, growing and feeding off of his negative thoughts and energy… until it gained its own consciousness because of his tremendous power. That's your enemy."

"But I thought these people are not our real enemy?" Nokoru asked.

"Well, it was already kind of late when I realized that the core, which is your real enemy, is the one leading this group." Yuuko said. "Right now, that dark Kamui is still playing with you so he's still not showing his true self. But if he ever got bored, or if he found the events disadvantageous for him, he'll definitely act seriously."

"We'll just have to protect Kamui, right?" Shiro asked. Yuuko smiled at him and nodded.

"There's nothing else to do than protect Kamui." Yuuko said as she yawned. Subaru wanted to kick her face for acting like this was not her concern. "But I don't mean just physically protect Kamui. Like I said, this dark Kamui is feeding off of the real Kamui's negative energies. It means that you need to protect his mentality and emotions as well." She then gave Subaru a meaningful smile. "Do you know when this Kamui first started appearing?"

Subaru immediately knew what Yuuko was pertaining to. He was not an idiot to not realize something like that. That dark Kamui first appeared when the onmyouji told Kamui that the only important person for Subaru was his deceased lover.

"It seems the Sakurazukamori already realized it. And that is all. Goodbye!" Yuuko gulped another mouthful of sake again before the screen blanked out and the glow from Mokona's forehead vanished.

Subaru clenched his fists. _Once again… it was all his fault once again… Maybe it would've been better had he not travelled with the boy…_

"Subaru." Nokoru called seriously. "I believe you should begin your explanation. We don't have much time." The onmyouji looked at the blonde and saw how cold those eyes were. He had never seen Nokoru's eyes that cold. _The blonde was blaming him for everything…_

He sighed as he sat together with them; they all formed a small circle. He felt his chest clenched painfully when he looked at Kamui who was looking everywhere except him and the others whose eyes were glued to him. _If only it's the other way around… _"…I first saw the other Kamui when we were in that Candy Island. I first thought he was just an ordinary feather, but I was wrong. I also saw him right before Kamui was pulled in by the tree… and earlier, when Yuuko appeared."

"Why does this dark Kamui, or whatever, only appear before you?" Shiro asked. He didn't sense any other presence earlier. And he would immediately know if there was someone not part of the group who just joined to meddle with them. _Somehow, that realization unnerved him._

"…Because Kamui hates me." Subaru voiced quietly as he clenched his fist. "He hates me so much that he wants to break me little by little…" Somehow, voicing that statement was enough to make the darkness escalate inside his heart.

"I don't hate you." Kamui spoke to him for the first time, and Subaru felt like he wanted to hear more. He wanted to hear Kamui's voice talking to him. _He missed Kamui's warm voice so much… _Kamui looked undecided for a while, before he walked towards the onmyouji and knelt in front of him. The boy meekly cupped his cheek and gently pulled Subaru into an embrace. Subaru closed his eyes as he rested on Kamui's chest when he felt the boy's warmth. _He liked it so much… just like a drug… _"I don't hate you." Kamui repeated. Even without looking, Subaru knew Kamui was smiling gently.

_How he longed to hear those words… If only Kamui would still say that even if he remembered everything…_

Subaru pulled away a little to face the younger male and looked at Kamui's beautiful amethyst eyes. "But your other self does. Because your other self knows what happened between us in the past…" He voiced. He knew Kamui didn't remember anything. But he still thought that the boy needed to know that he was not the kind of person the boy thought him to be. _He's afraid… He's afraid that Kamui would reject him this time… but he knew he needed to tell the boy…_

He clutched Kamui's black sweater and continued to gaze at those kind amethyst orbs, silently pleading that he'd be forgiven. He then cupped Kamui's cheek with his hand before he spoke in a very pained voice. "I abandoned you. I completely, repeatedly rejected you… until all you can do is break down and shatter alone… I'm sorry… Kamui… I'm too weak to support you, too weak to even choose you…"

Kamui felt his breath hitched at those statements. He looked down, hiding the pain that immediately clouded his eyes, before he immediately looked up and covered it. …But not enough because the others immediately saw through him. "It's alright." He smiled. "I still don't hate you."

Subaru knew Kamui was partly saying that because the boy didn't want to hurt the poor onmyouji. He knew Kamui must be hurting inside, and he knew it was not okay for the boy too. _Kamui was so much stronger than he was… so much stronger than he could ever be…_

The boy was just too kind.

"Anyway," Nokoru interrupted. It really felt like they were watching some romantic tragedy or something, and the blonde didn't want to see any lovey-dovey scene just yet. Not because it reminded of his deceased lover, but he just wanted to tell the two that the rest of them were still there, basically watching everything. "Is there some hints of when he'll start to get serious? The other Kamui, that is."

Subaru closed his eyes again as he inhaled the amethyst-eyed teen's scent. Kamui sat beside him now and it calmed his heart a ton. _Kamui was really becoming a drug to him… an intoxicating one…_ "I think he's starting to get serious. After all, we already got six feathers. Their group already has three, excluding the core. Then there will only be three other feathers out there before we set our eyes on one another's feathers."

"That's quite near…" Fuuma mumbled, thinking how the hell he could go to his own dimension if the situation was this dire. Nokoru nodded his assent while Shiro only looked thoughtful.

"Mokona thinks we should all go to sleep now and get ready for the next journey." They almost forgot the fur ball's presence until he spoke. He had been quite silent all this time after all. How unusual.

"I think Mokona-san is right." Nokoru said with a smile.

They all decided that talking about it wouldn't actually bring it to stop. Fuuma sat leaning on the tree while Mokona nuzzled on his side. The raven male was just too tired to get ticked off by the fur ball's clinginess. In front of them, Nokoru lay on his side on the grass, his back on Fuuma and was facing Kamui who was beside him. The boy's back was facing the blonde as his head pillowed on Shiro who slept like how dogs usually did. Subaru was on Kamui's other side, also facing Kamui.

The boy looked too tired with all the heartbreak and the feather problems that he fell asleep almost immediately. Subaru missed him so much that he couldn't help but brush the tousled fringe off the boy's sleeping face. He somehow found himself relaxing by doing that. Slumber took him as his hand rested on top of the boy's.

_Kamui's presence was like an intoxicating drug. The more he has, the more he wanted for more. He couldn't let go even if he wanted to. He was already addicted…_

"Subaru, Subaru!"

Subaru woke up, realizing he was once again in a different place, but in not the darkness where he had instinctively associated to the dark Kamui. No, this place was just the opposite.

Everything was bright. The ocean looked so alive and the wind felt so good on his skin as he looked at the horizon. He felt so calm and at peace. _He wondered how Kamui would react if he ever saw something this beautiful. _He distinctively remembered how Kamui once told him that he had never seen the ocean before. That conversation took place a long, long time ago… before all hell broke lose.

That time when all of them were in Sorata's house, drinking tea or eating Yuzuriha and Arashi's cooked food while waiting for any news about Kamui's twin star, seemed so surreal now. It's as if those times were merely dreams. Kamui was so strong then, so independent and so decisive. He was still Subaru Sumeragi, an onmyouji and also the head of the Sumeragi Clan. _But now… both he and Kamui weren't even in that world anymore…_

And as he looked at the beautiful ocean in front of him, he found himself thinking of only one thing. _How he wished Kamui could see it too. _The beautiful ocean far and wide, bright and gleaming under the sun… The sand looked so soft on his bare feet, if only he wasn't wearing his full Sakurazukamori attire minus the shoes.

"Subaru!" He turned around and saw his twin sister waving a hand at him. She was together with Kakyou. The latter was simply sitting on a bench and watching the sea contentedly while Hokuto was running to and fro the beach. _So this must be a dream…_

He sighed as he approached her. She gave him a smile and a pat on the head. She used to do that when they were little, and still did even when he started to outgrow her. _She also did that just before she died._

Hokuto was laughing in merriment as she once again ran around in circles. Kakyou couldn't help but chuckle as well as he watched her. "Subaru! You should try to relax sometimes! Your shoulders are too stiff!" She said as the onmyouji approached the two of them.

Subaru only gave him a sheepish smile before he asked the question he wanted to know ever since he arrived at the place. "Where is this place?"

Kakyou was the one who answered. "This is the world inside my mind."

"But you're dead…" Subaru mumbled and he immediately received a full kick on the stomach from his sister. He gasped for air and from pain as he stumbled on the sand. He could hear Hokuto laughing from somewhere nearby.

"Wha–?" Subaru managed to utter.

"That's for looking so gloomy in this happy world!" Hokuto snorted happily. "I will never allow you to show that pathetic face here, Subaru!"

Subaru couldn't help but chuckle at that comment. It was warm, the feeling. He had not laughed for a long, long time now and he felt like some of the thousand twisted thorns crippling his shattered heart finally ebbed.

"So you wish for that boy to see this too?" Hokuto asked with a wide grin.

Subaru immediately knew what that grin meant and he immediately corrected her while keeping himself from blushing. "N-No, that's wrong! We don't have that kind of–!"

"You're too stubborn for your own good. Sooner or later someone will definitely go and snatch him away from you…" Hokuto said as she looked at Subaru seriously. Subaru knew he heard that line somewhere before.

"Don't misunderstand, nee-san. I don't like him that way…" Subaru said and he received a full jab on his upper arm.

"You're a pathetic liar, just like always." Hokuto scolded. "You know you feel something for him. Why repress it?"

"I don't want that feeling." Subaru immediately answered as he looked down. "You know I still love Seishirou-san. I don't want to betray his memory by loving someone else…"

"But Seishirou-san wouldn't like that either." Hokuto sighed. "He wanted you to live with his memories, not just survive serving as the vessel for the past."

"No, you don't understand!" Subaru looked like a child wanting the adults to see his point. "I don't want to love him!"

"So you're hurting him instead?" Kakyou was the one who asked the question this time. "You don't want to get hurt so it doesn't matter if Kamui suffers for it..?"

"N-No… I don't mean it like that…" Subaru's eyes were pleading. He wanted the two people in front of him to understand.

"And if," Hokuto didn't want to hurt his younger brother, but she knew the boy needed it. "If you fell in love with him for real, are you still going to deny it? Are you still going to continue hurting and rejecting him while denying that you feel anything?"

"I'm the Sakurazukamori!" Subaru shouted desperately. "How can I be killing people and at the same time with these same bloodstained hands embrace Kamui too?! It's just too unforgivable… staining Kamui with my hands… It would be too selfish of me to even wish of something like wanting to hold him…"

"Yuuko-san already took the tree from you." Hokuto said, trying to reason out with her younger brother. "There's no need to continue killing anymore."

"But that doesn't change the fact that these hands were already tainted with too much blood… And the power of the Sakurazukamori is still within me…" Subaru mumbled, trembling.

"Then if you don't want Kamui, what is it that you really want, Subaru?" Kakyou asked.

Subaru looked at them with pained expression, and both of them knew what he really wanted. _Seishirou..._ Even if he might have feelings for Kamui now, and a strong one at that, it still didn't change the fact that he loved Seishirou so much… and would probably continue to love the man for eternity… _Or at least that's what he always told himself…_

He gritted his teeth in frustration. He claimed to love Seishirou so much when all he could think about these past two days was Kamui's safety and his whereabouts. _No, ever since they started travelling in different dimensions, all he could about was Kamui… _He closed his eyes and Hokuto saw the confusion and the fear on his expression. _What if he really was falling for Kamui..? What would he do then..?_

"Kamui is…" Subaru mumbled as he opened his eyes again. Hokuto and Kakyou waited for him to continue. "Kamui is like the sun… He's so bright… He's too dazzling that it hurts my eyes… I live in the darkness… We can't be together…"

Hokuto smiled as the real reason came out. Her brother was afraid because Kamui was just too dazzling for him, unlike Seishirou who was the same as he was, a creature of the darkness. Though it seemed rationality wouldn't be able to help Subaru this time. _There was no more escape for him…_

"Do you know?" She looked at the sky where the bright sun was and covered her eyes with her hand. "The sun is so bright because it eats and burns itself up from the inside out without hesitation…"

Subaru's eyes widened. "What do you mean by that?" Somehow, he didn't like that analogy.

Hokuto looked at him again. "It means Kamui is killing himself just to be your light."

"N-No…" Subaru woke up with a start, feeling the soft grass underneath him. He looked at Kamui's beautiful sleeping face and he had to fight the urge to suddenly hug him tight.

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: Are the two of us, Subaru and I, okay now? Or is this the start of some kind of farewell..?

Ren-sama: I don't know. I'm not really sure…

Yue: What a useless author.

Ren-sama: Host-san, please tell your assistant to shut his mouth up.

Host: Oh-oh… Why me?

Kamui: (*looked at Ren-sama with his innocent expression*) So, are you just trying to really bully me? Is this some sort of conspiracy?

Ren-sama: (*nosebleed*) No, please! I'm not bullying you!

Host: Very well, please review, everyone! ˆoˆ

(At the background, Ren-sama – bleeding to death)

Subaru: (*hiding somewhere no one knew about*) So I'm falling for him..? I'm… so annoying… Why so slow?


	16. Chapter 16

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Yep, thank you for your heartwarming reviews! OTL **

**The comments really make my heart flutter in bliss every time I read them! **

**This is the next chapter and I hope you enjoy it! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 16**

"_So, when will you recover your memories?" Kotori asked._

"_I don't know. But I don't want to pressure any of my companions… especially Subaru." Kamui answered as he fidgeted in his sit._

"_You love him, don't you..?" Karen asked as she patted Kamui's back._

_Kamui couldn't help but blush at the question before he chose to look at the fidgeting hands on his lap. "I don't know… but I don't want him to be sad just because of me…" Kamui said. He knew it was just a dream, but it was kind of enjoying talking with them like this. Even though he really didn't know them and had just met them in this dream, he still thought they must have been really close to him._

"_You love him!" Sorata teased and Kamui couldn't help but blush even more. "Ah, I can't believe it! He still loves Subaru even though he already lost his memories!"_

"_Ah, he's blushing even more now! How cute!" Karen chuckled. Kotori chuckled as well._

_Not far from them, Fuuma was silently listening though his eyes were closed. Kamui noticed that and approached him. "Are you okay?"_

_Fuuma smirked, though his eyes were still closed. "You're the one living right now, so why ask me?"_

"_Oh." Kamui sat beside him. The others merely watched in silence. _

"_By the way, how will you tell him?" Fuuma changed the topic back._

"_Eh?" Kamui's head leaned to one side._

"_I said, how will you tell that Subaru guy that you love him?" Fuuma said. "The last time you did, he utterly rejected you."_

"_I'll just have to hide it then." Kamui answered automatically. Fuuma looked at him sadly. "I don't think I have any need to tell him since he already made it clear that the only person he loves is that guy named Seishirou."_

"_I don't remember Subaru ever telling you that guy's name, Kamui." Kotori interrupted them. "Don't tell me, you remembered his name even though you've forgotten all about us?"_

"_Eh? No… I…" Kamui tried to think of how he came in contact with that name. Somehow, he just knew it. He didn't know why._

"_Must be the power of rivalry." Sorata said smugly while nodding to himself._

"_There's no rivalry." Kamui half pouted and half scowled, which made them laugh even more. "There wasn't even a fight. I lost the competition completely before I could even participate."_

"_There's no need to look down on yourself, idiot." Fuuma said as he patted Kamui's head. "There are still other people there whom you can give your love to. And those people would definitely return your feelings without hurting you."_

"_You mean like Fuuma or Nokoru?" Kamui asked, still a little confused. He hadn't completely lost his naivety after all. Fuuma cleared his throat. _

_Kotori and the others laughed at this. If there was one person Fuuma didn't want as a rival, it was the other Fuuma who looked so much like him. _

"_Can I ask you something, Fuuma?" Kamui's expression turned sadder. _

"_What is it?" Fuuma cupped Kamui's cheeks with his huge hands._

"_Am I… Am I the one who got you killed..?" Kamui asked pleadingly. "Am I the one who killed you..?"_

_That too, no one told him that. But somehow, he knew._

"_Why do you think that?" Fuuma asked._

"_Because I feel like I've really hurt you somehow…" Kamui looked at Fuuma's face directly. Fuuma sighed and patted Kamui's head again._

"_What happened to me wasn't your fault." He answered. "I wished for that to happen because I didn't want to kill you. I wished to be killed by you."_

_With that, Kamui looked down and started sobbing on the older man's chest. He couldn't help it. He knew Fuuma didn't hate him for it. But he just knew the guilt would consume him if he didn't let it all out. He continued sobbing until he heard Fuuma calling him again._

"_Kamui… Kamui…" But it wasn't Fuuma's voice. It was…_

"Kamui..?" He opened his eyes and met worried mismatched eyes.

"Subaru..?" He voiced, still hoarse. He then realized he was crying. The tears kept on flowing down his cheeks and he knew he couldn't stop them. Not when he just learned something so tragic.

"Kamui..? What's wrong?" Subaru asked quietly as he helped Kamui sit on the grass and hugged the boy. Kamui continued crying on the onmyouji's chest and all he could do was rub his back just to comfort the teen. There was something slowly breaking inside Subaru as he listened to Kamui's sobs. He didn't understand what it was, but it felt like his heart was filled with so much anguish and silent panic. Kamui crying was something he already witnessed, almost every night for a year now ever since the Promised Day. But he still couldn't help but break at the sight of it even now. It was a sound he didn't like and never would. He hugged Kamui tighter.

"It's alright." Nokoru also knelt beside Subaru and patted Kamui's head. "You must have had a nightmare."

"Kamui…" Both Mokona and Shiro nuzzled him just to get him to stop.

"Hey, kid." Fuuma managed to say. He was not fan of comforting people and he certainly didn't have to be comforted so he didn't know how it's done. It worked, however, because Kamui immediately looked at him and whimpered.

"Kamui?" Subaru called, a little confused at the fact that Kamui was looking at Fuuma with anguished eyes. But before he could even confirm his dread, Kamui already ran to where Fuuma was and hugged the older man.

"K-Kamui?" Fuuma looked down and blinked. It was somehow cute that Kamui ran to him while crying, except for the fact that he was not that sadistic of a person. He hugged the boy back and only then did Kamui started to cease from crying.

"Like the blonde said, it's only a nightmare." He said as he caressed the boy's hair with his palm while his other hand supported Kamui's back.

Subaru's brow twitched in annoyance. Somehow he didn't like it that Kamui ran away from him while crying and then hugged Fuuma of all people. It would've been better if the boy hugged Shiro or Mokona. _But it was Fuuma!_

"Jealous?" Nokoru whispered beside him, obviously in the mood for teasing. Subaru gave him a glare and the blonde immediately broke out laughing.

"Why, Nokoru? What's the joke?" Mokona hopped on his shoulder and kept on persisting him to answer.

"No, no. Nothing, Mokona-san." Nokoru said, teary-eyed. "I might find myself hanged under that sakura tree if I ever voiced that again." And yet he still kept on laughing.

Subaru's irritation was rising and it didn't help the fact that Kamui was hugging Fuuma too tight and the latter was hugging him too.

"You two can stop snuggling each other now." Subaru managed to voice with a slight growl. Shiro looked at him meaningfully and had the look of someone realizing something so obvious.

Fuuma felt the dagger-like glare that Subaru kept throwing at him and he somehow couldn't help but comment. "Just yesterday you don't want to be any ten feet near Kamui and now you don't want anyone a meter near him?"

Subaru looked at him coldly, but his eyes widened when Fuuma smirked. He lifted Kamui up just so their faces were aligned, and immediately gave the boy a kiss on the cheek near, very near, his mouth. Kamui was surprised that he blinked at Fuuma before he visibly blushed, not that he wasn't red from all the crying he did.

Subaru stood up and immediately grabbed Kamui away from him. Nokoru was trying his hardest to stifle a laugh. He knew Fuuma was teasing Subaru, and the guy apparently won.

"Don't come near that guy," Subaru told Kamui just as he let the boy sit beside him and wiped the tears off of the teen's cheeks.

"Or you'll get pregnant, Kamui." Mokona said. Subaru's eyes widened and immediately grabbed the white fur ball on the head and threw him towards Nokoru. He was clearly a bad influence that would definitely taint Kamui's innocent mind. The blonde efficiently caught Mokona with two gentle hands.

Fuuma laughed softly when he heard the Sakura guy's comment. He didn't think Subaru would be this fun to tease. _But he also knew deep inside him that it was only _half a joke_ when he tried to kiss the boy on the mouth. Of course, he stopped at the last moment and only kissed Kamui near his lips. _It was both erotic and sweet. Subaru looked at Fuuma again with his icy glare as if reading his very thought.

"That would've been fun, if it was really a joke." Shiro commented, which made them all look at him. "Oh, forget about me, I'm just talking in my sleep."

Nokoru looked at Fuuma, who only smirked. "Relax, it was really just a joke."

"Really?" Nokoru asked in amusement. Now he thought that there would be two people he could tease with Kamui.

After that, they gathered some fruits from the nearby forest and ate quietly.

"Anyway, we should be going now." Mokona said as they finished eating. The fur ball glowed as huge wings on his back and pulled them all in another dimension.

And the next moment, Kamui found himself alone… again. He was once again in the middle of a forest. But everything looked too animated to actually be called a real forest. He looked down and his amethyst eyes immediately widened as he stared at himself.

"Oh, no…" He mumbled. "I'm dreaming… I should be dreaming…" He pinched his cheek and winced at the pain. "Oh no… I'm not dreaming..?"

He really wished he was. Looking down, all he could see himself wearing was a frilly dress with raven and crimson color combination. The entirety of the dress was black, except for a red ribbon on the middle of his chest and a red sash forming a ribbon with long lace on his back. The skirt measured only down to his middle thighs and they had fanned out design, too bulgy, that he knew there were white frilly undergarments inside. He tried to flatten the skirt with his two hands in order to at least see his feet, but it was to no avail. The dress looked much like how Card captors usually wore in their card quest… _Who again?_

He also wore high pointed cute black boots with red ribbon each in front and he felt himself burning with so much embarrassment. He might be an amnesiac but he knew what he should and shouldn't be wearing. His initial plan was to remove the dress, but he realized he would have nothing to wear if he really took it off now. He sighed before he walked around to see if his companions would be somewhere in the forest.

A figure sprinted passed him and he immediately saw Shiro hopping away. "S-Shiro! Wait!" _Wait! Wasn't he supposed to be a Kodan who looked more like a dog than a white rabbit?_

Shiro, however, didn't seem to notice him and just continued hopping away. "I'm going to be late! I'm going to be late!" And he immediately transformed into his original size, twice as tall as Fuuma, and dashed forward, leaving Kamui gaping at him.

He ran as fast as he could, trying to catch up to the kodan who was nowhere to be found now. Suddenly, a figure appeared from behind him again.

"Hello there, young Princess!" Kamui turned and found Mokona up in the air, apparently floating.

"Mokona?" Kamui called. He didn't know if that was part of Mokona's 109 Secret Abilities. But the fur ball surely hadn't done that in the past.

"No! I'm Cheshire Mokona, you rude Princess!" Mokona scolded as he grinned darkly. "Shall I take you to the Hatter now?"

"Is this some sort of conspiracy against me, Mok–, Cheshire Mokona?" Kamui couldn't help but be suspicious. His companions were acting weird and he had no idea why.

"NO! Just follow Cheshire Mokona and you'll get to see Hatter, Princess!" He flew in the air and Kamui had to leap from tree to tree just to be able to follow. _Hell, he should've done that earlier._

"Wait, I'm a princess? Is that why I'm wearing this strange frilly clothing?" Kamui asked in panic, a little loud so Mokona could hear him.

"Of course you're a princess! Did you hit your head somewhere? You should be more careful, Princess!" Mokona asked as he shook his head. "And just because you wear the traditional Princess clothing doesn't mean you can already call them strange! You really are rude! Maybe you really hit your head somewhere!"

"But I'm male!" Kamui shouted.

"But that doesn't change the fact that you're still the princess." Mokona looked like he was disappointed.

"Fine, where's this Hatter thing?" He asked and once again received once of those head shakes from the fur ball. But at least Mokona had forgotten his sad expression.

"Hatter is human, Princess! Do you have amnesia or something?" Mokona asked incredulously. "Anyway, we're here."

Kamui hopped from the tree onto the ground. He couldn't see anything except trees, trees, and more trees. There were a lot of bushes too. Mokona started hopping away and he immediately followed behind the fur ball while scanning his surroundings. _Why was Shiro and Mokona acting weird?_

He still hadn't answered the question when Mokona lead him to a place where there weren't much trees. The boy saw a long elegant table with a soft satin for cover. On the head side sat Subaru who wore a tattered black fedora hat. He smiled when his eyes met Kamui's. _Now even Subaru was acting weird!_

"Subaru?" Kamui called just as the man stood up from his seat and approached the raven-haired boy.

Kamui's eyes widened when Subaru knelt in one knee in front of him and extended out his hand. "It's good to finally see you, my Hime." Kamui reluctantly placed his hand on top of the man's, wondering what would be done to it, and Subaru bent his head and kissed it.

"Eh!?" Kamui looked too confused that Subaru blinked, though his grip on Kamui's hand was tight.

"Don't tell me you still want to deny me as your fiancée? You do know that your Mother the Red Queen chose me for you." Subaru looked a little hurt. "Please stop rejecting me, my Hime. It truly pains me to have my fiancée always running away with my archrival, the Doormouse."

Kamui stood there, stunned, as he looked at Subaru like the latter was the craziest person in the whole universe. _What exactly was going on here?_

.

~tbc~

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren-sama: If he didn't like the dress then why didn't he just take it off?

Kamui: Are you dumb? Do you think walking around naked is anywhere more comfortable than wearing a so-called princess attire?

Ren-sama: What an alibi for someone who inwardly really wanted to try out those kinds of dress.

Kamui: (*blush*) I do not inwardly wish to dress like that!

Ren-sama: Oh, but I'm the author. I know what you're thinking.

Kamui: (*horror stricken*) I… actually… like to wear dresses unconsciously? I'm… a transvestite..?

Ren-sama: (*looked away while grinning, little horns sprouting from her head*)

Yue: (*sips his tea without any care in his surrounding*)

Host: (*sighed*) Sorry if it's quite short. It seemed the author really is a sadistic person. Anyway, please review.


	17. Chapter 17

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Belated Happy New Year to everyone! I really, really thank you all for continuing to read this fict. Thank you for all of your continuous support and also encouraging words/comments! **

**This chapter contains some minor sexual content so please beware, or rather, don't get too excited now. Don't go skipping the first part just to get on with the **_**scene**_**, okay? Please read with tissue beside you for the drool/nosebleed. Just kidding! ˆoˆ**

**Oh, and those who might not like the threesome, sorry about this.**

**.**

**Chapter 17**

"E-Excuse me?" Kamui stuttered. "Can you repeat that again? What are you talking about, Subaru?"

"Hatter, I think the princess hit his head and has amnesia right now." Mokona mumbled sadly, looking at the now shocked older male.

"I-Is that true, my Hime?" Subaru asked, deep and unfathomable worry etched on his gaze and expression.

Kamui couldn't help but let his stunned expression melt into a warm smile, which made Subaru's eyes widened. "I'm fine, Subar–, H-Hatter." More than the fact that he was shocked to the extreme, the only expression he didn't want Subaru to have, may he be a fake or not, was a worried or pained expression.

With that act, Subaru immediately stood up and lock Kamui in his arms. The boy was too surprised that he immediately blushed. Subaru pulled out of the hug for a bit to take a good long look at Kamui and gave the boy a warm and blissful smile when he saw Kamui blushing deeply. It seemed he was so amused at the fact that his lover was behaving so differently than usual.

"I guess there are bright sides in having some amnesia after all." Mokona mumbled amusedly as he nodded to himself, though sadly, the two males were too busy looking at one another to even notice that he was still present there.

"You're really cute, my Hime." Subaru kissed the boy's forehead. Kamui looked too stunned to even talk. He was even actually gaping. For the cool and collected Sakurazukamori to say cheesy lines like that was unheard of, if not entirely impossible. "Please tell me, am I dreaming right now? It seemed so good to be true, for you to even look at me, Hime…"

"I think that question should be asked by me…" Kamui mumbled, not knowing how to react when Subaru's face was just inch from his. He could practically inhale Subaru's intoxicatingly sweet scent and feel the older male's breath on his flushed cheeks. It was making him feel a little giddy, if not happy.

There was only one explanation about all this. _This was nothing but a dream… _Yes, Kamui must be dreaming. _Yes, that would explain everything..! Maybe he landed in another dimension only to get hit his head on the ground and lose consciousness! _Or maybe it was the result of the still awkward moments between him and Subaru? They had just talked after some days of totally ignoring each other's presence and he must've been dreaming about it. _Or maybe it was because he just liked Subaru so much…_

The younger male couldn't help but blush at the thought. Just thinking that he was dreaming of Subaru right now was enough to make him blush to the tips of his hair. Subaru chuckled when he saw the teen fidgeting while blushing, making Kamui stare at him in amazement – momentarily forgetting his embarassment. Subaru was starting to do all the things that he always wanted to see the man do and he felt like he was really dreaming. "Subaru…"

"You keep calling me by that name. Where did you get that?" Subaru didn't look particularly annoyed, just plain curious. He tipped his head to the side, an act that was so cute it was making the younger male blush again.

Kamui chuckled, not really knowing how to explain that the man in front of him might be going crazy by saying things like that. Subaru's eyes immediately widened at the other's action. He had never ever seen his Hime smile in his direction and now he was chuckling. He closed his eyes to etch the memory deep in his mind and heart.

"Hime…" Subaru voiced, cool and sweet at the same time.

"Huh?" Kamui looked up, only to be stunned again by Subaru's next words.

"Can I…" Subaru's cheeks flushed and this scene didn't escape Kamui's beyond shocked eyes. _Subaru was acting like a coy princess! _Now he didn't know if the dream he was having was romantic or just plain disturbing. "Can I kiss you?"

Kamui stopped. He stared into those mismatched eyes and saw utter seriousness and fear.

Subaru feared that he would be rejected. Maybe he was getting ahead of himself. He was already five years engaged to his Hime and yet the cool and aloof princess chose to let her first kiss be shared with that damn Doormouse. _If only this would last forever…_

Kamui gulped. He didn't know what to say. He was never asked about such things yet, and it was really embarrassing to be directly asked, especially by Subaru.

"I-It's okay if you don't want to! I'm sorry I'm just being getting a little too ahead of myself." Subaru immediately dismissed the topic and chuckled a little, but Kamui saw the immediate flash of pain in the other's eyes.

"N-No, it's okay…" Kamui said shyly, barely a whisper. "I… don't mind…" He didn't want to see Subaru in pain. It's not that he didn't like it, he was just… _stunned. _

Subar smiled at him and Kamui was glad that his mismatched eyes were relieved. "Are you sure?"

The boy just nodded, fidgeting with his dress a little. _He didn't mind if it was Subaru… Actually, he would love it if it was Subaru… No! What was he thinking!? _He blushed deeply just thinking about it. Oh, well… _He might just get over his shyness and take advantage of this sweet and beautiful dream he was having._

Kamui smiled sweetly and shyly pulled Subaru closer by clutching the latter's clothing. He hesitated for a moment, realizing he might be forcing the older male. But when he looked at Subaru, the latter had a brow arched, silently asking why he stopped.

The teen chuckled and, blushing a little, shyly leaned closer and gently touched Subaru's warm and soft lips with his own. His innocence immediately got in the way and he thought that kind of kiss was already deep and passionate enough. He was about to break their lips apart when he felt Subaru's hand hold his nape, pulling him even closer. Kamui gasped in surprise and he felt rather than saw Subaru smirked.

"I don't think my existence is still needed." Mokona mumbled. "I guess I'll just have to flirt with the Black Mokona." He then started hopping off on his own. "I wonder where he is right now…"

Subaru playfully licked Kamui's lower lip and the latter immediately turned deep crimson. Kamui closed his eyes and let the other male enter his moist mouth. Subaru was a rather good and experienced kisser even inside a dream and he proved that fact once again. He played with Kamui's tongue and the boy felt like he was about to melt in Subaru's arms. Subaru moaned seductively and gently pushed his lover on a tree and pressed against him. Kamui gasped in surprise at the action, making Subaru deepen their kiss even more, if that was even possible.

Subaru's hands began to travel down Kamui's side seductively, making the latter moan. He circled his arms around the older man's neck, pulling him even closer. He could feel his shaft slowly getting hard because of the pleasurable sensation of Subaru's tongue inside his mouth, not to mention the man's exploring hands, and he was thankful that his dress was fanned out so it wasn't obvious.

Subaru parted their mouth reluctantly in order to breath, a thin line of saliva connecting their tongue. Kamui looked dazed a she looked at the other male and Subaru's eyes held both lust and love at the same time while keeping his gaze at his lover. Licking the streak of drool beside Kamui's mouth, his lips started to travel lower down the boy's jaw and down to his neck.

Kamui arched his head for Subaru to have better access over his creamy flesh, his arms around Subaru's neck tightening unconsciously. Subaru nibbled and licked and sucked the boy's flushed flesh with utter gentleness and seduction. His lust-glazed eyes would dart on Kamui's pleasured expression once in a while before continuing. _He liked this person so much. _He wanted to pleasure Kamui more than he wanted to feel pleasure. He wanted to hear the boy's moans and screams of pleasure and ecstasy and he bet he was getting horny now. _And yet, he still wanted more… He wanted all of Kamui…_

Subaru could practically feel his shaft bulging from his pants and he was glad Kamui could not feel it because of the latter's frilly dress. He really looked too cute and sexy at the same time that Subaru was barely escaping a gush of perverted nosebleed. _Kamui was just so beautiful… so gorgeous and so charming… not to mention too sexy and delicious for his own good._

"Subaru…" Kamui voiced, still eyes closed.

"Hmm?" Subaru answered even though it wasn't his name. Well, he practically knew he was the one being called anyway.

"Please do it with me…" The answer was in a shy and quiet voice. Kamui looked stunned as well. _Was it his voice just now? He did say that?! He didn't even remember the words forming in his mind! Was he that much of a closet pervert?!_

"I would like to, but… are you sure?" Subaru asked again, blushing deeply. "I might not be able to stop myself even if you decide to back out."

Kamui reddened once again, thinking about how on earth did that sentence managed to sneak up on him, before he nodded. _Well, this was practically a dream anyway… There would be no harm done once he wakes up… And besides, he knew inside that he liked Subaru only so much…_

"Then do you want to strip me..?" Subaru voiced flirtatiously.

Kamui chuckled shyly as he nodded. Subaru smiled and leaned both his hands on either side of Kamui, trapping the boy between him and the tree. Kamui gazed at his lover's handsome face and sexy slender body for a while before his hands reached up to him. Subaru hummed as he was slowly stripped off of his clothes by his lover. First, Kamui took off the Hatter's top hat, dropping it unceremoniously on the ground. Then he pulled down the man's brown neck tie… then unbuttoned his black vest. It wouldn't come off though because it was tucked in the older male's black pants.

The younger boy's eyes widened when he realized that his lover was hard. The pair of pants was kind of tight and his shaft was bulging.

Kamui bit his lower lip as he glanced at his lover. He saw how those mismatched eyes were silently challenging him to take _his_ pants off. Kamui's eyes widened again when Subaru smirked because he guessed right. The younger boy gulped. _Okay, it seemed this Subaru/Hatter was proving to be a little, no, a lot more perverted than the real one._

Subaru watched as Kamui turned redder and redder as he struggled to unclasp the older male's belt as he felt himself get harder and harder from just watching his flustered sexy lover. Once it was already pried open, Kamui unbuttoned Subaru's pants and he heard the older male moaned behind his ears when the back of his hand accidentally brushed against the hard manhood.

Kamui smirked, though only a shadow of the one he always used back when he still had his memories, and stopped working on the Subaru's pants. He resumed on unbuttoning the rest of the older male's vest and he heard Subaru groaned in impatience.

The boy couldn't help but chuckle at his lover's attitude. Subaru was always calm and collected, even when he's angry. He was so used to Subaru being so cold and aloof, not hot and burning with intense lust and desire. _This dream was proving to be the direct opposite of the Subaru that he knew… And yet, he felt that it was really Subaru despite the total opposite character…_

Subaru bit his lover's ear tenderly and he felt Kamui shivered. He let the boy took off his vest while wondering how he would seductively take off Kamui's clothing.

Kamui bit his lower lip to not moan while Subaru continued to lick and nibble on his pulse, the one just behind his ear. He was starting to shiver again, in pure delight of course. And after some half-hearted try on unbuttoning Subaru's white long sleeves, he settled on just clutching tightly on the sleeves while quietly, or at least trying his best to stay quiet, reveling on the pleasure that Subaru was giving him.

"Hime…" Subaru murmured quietly as he continued kissing Kamui's neck, jaw, and throat. He soon found out that Kamui's clothing was in the way, though he was not in any hurry to unclothe his shy lover. His hands, instead, traveled downwards slowly, taking in every shape and curves of the younger male and making Kamui's breath hitch.

"Subaru…" Kamui voiced, much too dazed by pleasure. Subaru's lips found his jaw and then his lips, licking his way in. Kamui moaned in Subaru's mouth and the older male readily absorbed the sound. His hands traveled even downwards, down on Kamui's skirt. He might not be in a hurry to undress Kamui but he didn't say anything about not touching his lover under the clothing.

Kamui gasped when he felt his lover's hands teased him from under his skirt. He visibly blushed, not that he wasn't blushing just a few moments ago. Subaru smiled mischievously. "You're pretty aroused, Hime."

His one hand had found its way inside Kamui's underwear while his other hand supported his lover, holding him on the waist. Kamui's eyes widened when the pleasure he felt suddenly escalated. His lover just rubbed a thumb on his tip. A pleasured whimper came out of his mouth and Subaru kissed him again.

The younger male moaned when Subaru started rubbing the tip of his manhood repeatedly, giving him tons of tons of pleasure. Subaru worked on undoing the ribbon behind Kamui's dress with his other hand and it fell on the dress's each side. He then worked on the zipper along the back of the dress, making the younger male's back totally exposed.

Kamui continued to moan and shiver in delight at the pleasure attacking his every pleasure point while Subaru continued his ministration on his dripping length and the Hatter's mouth sucked on the skin in between his neck and shoulder. He gave one last loud moan before he came on the onmyouji's hand, feeling embarrassed and dazed.

Subaru lifted up his cum-filled hand and licked the white liquid from it, much to Kamui's shock and embarrassment. The younger male watched in utter disbelief as Subaru licked every last bit of semen erotically. When he finished, he pulled Kamui into another breathtaking and torrid kiss just as he circled his hand on the younger male's shaft once more. Earlier, all he did was rub the tip until Kamui came. Now, he started pumping the length until it was hard again.

"What are you doing to my lover!?" A voice broke their kiss and they both stared at the man who stood at least three meters away from them. Kamui assumed he was the Doormouse that Subaru, the Hatter, was talking about. But seeing him, Kamui could only call him by one name.

"F-Fuuma?" Kamui called. Fuuma looked like he was in between aggravation and confusion.

"Princess, come here. That selfish man will not give you happiness." Fuuma held out his hand, still thinking that Kamui was forced.

"But Subaru is my fiancée… right?" His gaze turned to Subaru who only nodded, cold gaze still fixed on Fuuma. Now, that's the gaze that Kamui was familiar with. It's the kind of eyes hat were filled with deadly venom and utter coldness.

"Princess, what is the meaning of this?" Fuuma looked utterly confused now. "You told me you love me, and that you will elope with me! You told me your mother Nokoru, the Red Queen, only forced you into having him as a fiancée! Have you forgotten that? You and I are lovers even before you were engaged to that selfish Hatter!"

Kamui looked in between Subaru and Fuuma in confusion. _It was supposed to be his dream! Why was there too much he didn't know? How come he had two lovers? How come he didn't know they were his lovers? And how come he still had amnesia even in a dream? Really, what the hell was going on here?_

"Stop trying to get in my way, Doormouse." Subaru spoke the name with such contempt that Kamui didn't know if the real Subaru even had. His hold on Kamui's waist tightened, making the teen blush a little.

"Shut up, Hatter." Fuuma returned the deadly voice with the same intensity. "We both know that the Princess and I have a relationship. And that the two of you have nothing but a piece of paper junk stating your status as fiancées. He doesn't belong to you, Hatter. And you know that."

For a while, the youngest male was caught in between the deadly electricity emanating from the two rivals. But even if Fuuma couldn't see it, Kamui could. Subaru was in pain, a lot of it. _He was hurt by Fuuma's words… _The mere fact that Subaru's hold on him was getting too tight prove everything. _And he didn't want Subaru to ever be in pain… He liked Subaru so much…_"Fuuma, I like you. But I like Subaru too…" Kamui caught what he was saying and – shaking his head as he tried to think of a more appropriate word – changed it. "I mean… I like Subaru more… No, I like Subaru only."

"What did you do to my Princess!?" Fuuma looked like he was raging in anger, and only Kamui's presence was preventing him from attacking Subaru now.

Even the Hatter was in deep shock. He had never heard the princess speak of him like that at all. It seemed what Kamui had is a lot more than just a mere amnesia. And it made him nervous and scared that the princess might remember his feelings for his real lover. But above all that, he was more than happy to hear Kamui's words.

"Am I late?" Shiro jumped in between them, and seeing that no bloodbath had occurred yet, he sighed in relief. "I see that I wasn't late at all."

"The White Queen?" Subaru arched an eyebrow. Kamui looked at Shiro. _The White Queen? _"And now you call for your mother, Doormouse?"

"I believe I should be present as well then." Nokoru voiced from their side. "My son Kamui-hime is to be wed to Mad Hatter. There will be no further discussions."

"Wait a minute, nee-san." Shiro called. "You can't just ignore my son's feeling with your selfish decision. My son loves Hime as much as the Hatter loves him."

"That is of no concern to me." Nokoru brought out his fan and fanned himself before he looked at the Doormouse. "My Hime is already betrothed to Hatter. It is sinful to continue having an affair with him. You should stop your selfish actions, Doormouse."

Now, Kamui was thinking if this dream was really his or if he was just one of the characters. He couldn't understand what's going on, and he didn't think he wanted to know, what with all the conflicts and complications.

Kamui's shaft twitched and he reddened when he realized that Subaru was still holding it. _And it was still pretty hard…_

Fuuma's eyes narrowed at the teen's sudden embarrassment. Then it widened when he realized that Hatter was probably harassing his princess under that dress. He immediately padded over the two and immediately closed the distance between him and Kamui.

Kamui's eyes widened as he was sandwiched in between Subaru and Fuuma, who was now having a glaring contest. Queen Shiro sighed at his son's stubbornness and Queen Nokoru looked proud that his son had two admirers, even if he wouldn't admit it.

"What do you think you're doing?" Fuuma questioned threateningly, glaring at the Hatter with all his might.

"What I am doing with _my _lover is none of your business, Doormouse." Subaru almost snarled the words.

A gasp broke the two male's glaring contest and they looked down on Kamui who was visibly trying to hide the fact that he was blushing furiously. Subaru then realized that the gasp was because he was holding Kamui's shaft a little bit too tightly. And it seemed Fuuma realized that too.

"Fuuma!" He gasped again when he felt Fuuma touched his backside. _Why were they harassing him!? And now he was the prize for their competition? Had he no say to this?_

Fuuma hugged Kamui from behind and pulled him closer as he leaned on the tree where Kamui leaned earlier. Subaru didn't let go of Kamui, however, and was pulled together with the younger male.

"W-What are you two doing?" Kamui voiced, much too embarrassed and high in pleasure, as Fuuma grinded at him from behind and Subaru in front. Both of the males were hard and he was just as hard himself. Kamui could only moan at the insane pleasure the two were giving him and he could feel all rational thoughts slipping from his mind.

Both Subaru and Fuuma were looking at him with lust and desire, and love and warmth. It was enough to make them stop their competition for a while and focus more on pleasuring him than polishing their own ego.

"I think I can share just this once, _just this once_." Fuuma murmured, emphasizing the last part with a hiss.

"Hn." Subaru answered distractedly, too busy grinding against Kamui's hips.

Kamui's face was lifted by Fuuma's hand and the latter's lips quickly descended to the younger male's. Subaru saw how Kamui melted into the kiss and felt a pang of jealousy, but if it meant that Kamui would be with him, even if the Doormouse was there, then he wouldn't mind. He kissed Kamui's neck as he took off the teen's frilly choker. He was fumbling for the button of Kamui's clothing, to finally remove the dress once and for all, when a blinding light made them abruptly stop.

"Return to where you belong, Clow Card!" And the blinding light vanished.

Kamui found himself panting as he slowly opened his eyes. It seemed he was finally awake from the dream. He immediately reddened as he remembered how Subaru kissed him and how Fuuma kissed him while Subaru nibbled at his neck. _Not to mention that he came in Subaru's hand… _That was… quite embarrassing… How he managed to have that attitude, he didn't know. He knew he was quite innocent from such sexual things before the dream began. And now he knew what those things meant.

"Are you alright?" He looked up and saw a teenage girl with light brunette hair and bright green eyes beaming down at them while wearing... Kamui's eyes widened. _That's the dress he was wearing in his dream! _He looked at his surrounding and saw his companions lying on the soft grassy ground in much the same manner as he was. Subaru and Fuuma both had sleepy eyes but they were on their guard. Nokoru was yawning and Mokona was still nuzzling on his lap. Shiro was stretching. The sky had a faded color of orange. Clearly it was a little over sunset. "Sorry for getting you all involved. That was a Clow Card just now. You were sleeping on the ground and then the Dream Card saw you and casted a spell on all of you." She bowed. "I'm really sorry."

"Who're you?" Mokona asked, clearly still a bit out of it.

"I'm Sakura Kinomoto, a Card Captor." She smiled sheepishly. "Oh, I know! As an apology, you can all come to my house so I can cook for you!"

"NO, thank–" Fuuma was about to say when he was interrupted.

"Of course, thank you. Actually, we're pretty hungry." Nokoru said with a charming smile that didn't seem to work on Sakura. Maybe she already loved someone. Fuuma gave him a glare which he readily ignored.

"Have you no pride?" Fuuma hissed quietly but Nokoru only smiled.

"I don't care about pride when my stomach is rumbling." He answered. Well, Kamui and Subaru couldn't argue to that.

And so, all of them followed the teenage girl quietly, not looking at one another.

"What's a Clow Card? And what's this Dream Card?" Nokoru asked, but before Sakura could even answer, Mokona already beat her into it.

"Clow Cards are the magical Cards that Clow Reed, the most powerful magician, made from his power." Mokona explained. Sakura gave her a surprised look but didn't comment. "And I don't know anything about the Dream Card."

"Show off." Fuuma muttered under his breath.

Sakura simply chuckled. "Dream Card is a card that makes you dream of something that you wish for, though if not properly supervised, will turn out into a major illusion, twisting the supposed dreams that you have." Nokoru nodded in understanding. Fuuma merely shrugged, and Subaru and Kamui had no reaction whatsoever, at least none that showed on their faces. Shiro yawned as he walked on all fours.

"I've dreamed that I was a parent, instead of a simple husband. Does that mean I want a son?" Shiro shuddered, stealing a glance at Fuuma who glared at him. Nokoru could relate to that dream and he looked at Kamui who looked too innocent for his own good. Sakura chuckled again.

Fuuma closed his eyes as he remembered his dream. _How the hell would he be someone who'd dare get in between Subaru and Kamui? _He already had his own special someone. And even if that special someone looked a lot like Kamui, he was not at all Kamui. He sighed as he remembered agreeing to that damn thing, _threesome _was it?

Subaru sighed as he remembered the dream that he just had. The Kamui inside his dream was the complete opposite of the Kamui he knew. _Was that really his wish? _He shook his head as he tried to forget the indecent way in which he wanted to touch the younger boy. _How could he even dream of such dirty things when all he wanted was for Kamui to be safe and happy when he was awake? _He wanted to believe that the Dream Card just went berserk and had forgotten to really read what's on their mind._ And yet… he still had to fight of the blush that was threatening to appear on his pale cheeks as he remembered how Kamui's moans sounded and how his lips and skin tasted…_

The onmyouji found his way beside Kamui and looked at him worriedly. "Are you alright?" He asked. Kamui only nodded. He couldn't look at Subaru because of the dream he just had. How could he even explain that his so-called wish was to have Subaru as a lover? Or worse, to have both Subaru and Fuuma as lovers? Surely, the Dream Card was unsupervised and thus it was leaning more to being a mere illusion, right?

"What did you dream of?" Subaru asked, still a little worried that Kamui was so quiet. He was afraid that Kamui dreamed of disappearing again. _After all, it was the teen's wish. _He couldn't have that. "Kamui?" The others looked at the two of them, realizing that Subaru was somehow upset for Kamui.

"I'm fine." Kamui finally looked at Subaru and smiled, seeing the worried look on the other man's face. He didn't want to worry Subaru just because he was embarrassed at his dream. "I didn't have any major dream." _Only the most extreme one._

Subaru visibly relaxed though he wouldn't admit it. He brushed the hair from Kamui's face and tucked it behind his ears. Kamui found that Subaru had that habit, but he didn't mind. Not that it actually bothered him. It was actually even affectionate and he liked it. The onmyouji continued stroking Kamui's hair until they reached the house which screamed of Kamui's power.

"Feather!" Mokona's bright blue eyes opened, and they all looked at him in surprise before their gaze turned to Sakura who looked slightly confused.

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren: I think you might want to take over from here on, Host-san, Yue-san! (*runs away while being chased by hungry sakura petals*)

Host: That's what horny authors get when they try to play threesome on their characters.

Kamui: (*blushing*) The two of them… The two of them are my dream lovers..? Even Fuuma..?

Subaru: (*growled even more and sent more sakura petals after the author*)

Yue: Tch. (*And he sipped his tea again.*)

Host: W-Well… I guess… uh, please review? I know that this chapter is an attempt to ease the tension a little so… We, in Ren-san's stead, hope that you liked it!

Ren-sama: And please don't get too disappointed that the lemon didn't last long! We'll have more of that in the future… probably! (*while being chased by Sakura petals*)

ˆoˆ


	18. Chapter 18

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Yup, I thank you for the nice reviews about the last chapter! Hahaha, some of the comments even made me laugh. This is the next chapter and I hope you enjoy it as much as you enjoyed the last one. ˆoˆ**

**.**

**Chapter 18**

"W-Well, this is my house. Welcome!" Sakura chirped happily and bade them inside. Subaru immediately scanned the house with his eyes as they sat in the living room while Sakura prepared for dinner in the kitchen.

"I can help you if you want." Nokoru said as he went to the kitchen and offered to help but he was politely turned down.

"I can't just forcefully invite people to my house and then make them prepare for dinner, right?" She joked with a smile. "You all look tired. Maybe you should rest for a while."

"I know it's rude, but I want to check the house." Subaru suddenly barged into the kitchen too, making Nokoru and Sakura turned to him.

Sakura looked worried, but she knew that her visitors didn't look like thieves at all. "Okay, but you better not go to the basement. My father's important documents and papers are there. As well as his most of his work…"

Subaru merely nodded and he was gone. He left Kamui with Fuuma alone with one another, much to his annoyance. But he didn't have any time. He needed to look for that feather now. Mokona hopped behind him in an attempt to help him in sensing the feather that seemed to cover the whole house in its massive presence.

"Where do you think it might be?" Mokona asked as he tried his best to feel it. It was really hard to do so because of the fact that it covered the entire Kinomoto household.

"Let's start upstairs." Subaru merely voiced as he ascended the stairs.

"Shouldn't we ask Kamui where he feels his soul the strongest?" Mokona asked again. "Mokona means that the feathers usually glow brightly in Kamui's presence. And bringing him with us might actually help."

"I know what you're saying." Subaru answered. "But we can't. Kamui is tired right now."

Mokona sighed. "Kamui isn't as weak as you think he is, you know." When Subaru didn't answer, he sighed again but refrained to comment anymore.

Back in the living room, Kamui was still looking at the spot where Subaru disappeared from. Shiro was on his side and sleeping again just beside the couch where the amethyst-eyed teen was.

"He'll be back in a minute, brat." Fuuma's voice made the teen almost jump out of his seat. It seemed Fuuma walked over to his side of the couch when he wasn't looking and was now sitting comfortably beside him. Kamui nodded, indicating he listened to the older male's earlier words. The two of them remained quiet for a while.

"Fuuma," Kamui called so suddenly, making Fuuma looked at him with an arched eyebrow. The younger male looked a little unsure, but with Fuuma's quiet encouragement, he still voiced what he wanted to say. "Why do you look like the person in my head..?"

Fuuma blinked. "What?" And then he realized that Kamui must have been talking about the Fuuma that he killed. _And here they all thought that Kamui couldn't remember anything. _"Do you mean the other Fuuma?"

Kamui looked at him directly and nodded. "He talks to me all the time… inside my dreams… And he looks like you… And… I just have this feeling that I somehow… k…killed…" And he whimpered, not wanting to continue anymore.

Fuuma patted Kamui's head before he pulled the boy into a hug. "I don't know the whole story. But that guy isn't me."

"Then why are you with us? Why are there two of you? If you're not the Fuuma that I know… then why are you here?" Kamui asked innocently. Fuuma knew that the boy didn't mean anything bad and was not in any way offended.

Fuuma sighed. _Would he want to tell Kamui? _He looked at the younger male still nuzzling on his chest and decided. "You're right. I'm not the Fuuma that you know. That Fuuma is already dead. I'm from somewhere else. And I want to come back to my own dimension." He started, unaware that both Subaru and Nokoru were already on each side of the doorway. Subaru had just finished raking the second floor for the feather and was about to begin his search in the first floor when he saw Fuuma and Kamui in a quite a compromising position. The sight made him want to burn up the whole house, after making sure Kamui was safe of course.

"Why?" Kamui pushed him a little to look at him.

Fuuma let go of the younger male and sighed as he straightened in his seat. "I was born as a Lord Protector, brat. Do you know what that means?" Kamui shook his head, indicating that he didn't. "It means that even before conception, I was already destined to serve the royalty. And ever since I was a child, I have been trained to become a Lord Protector. I don't know who I was supposed to protect but I know that it's one of those stuck up children that the king had. I began to hate all of them, the king, my parents who were owned by the kingdom, the supposed prince or princess that I was supposed to protect, and even the trainers…"

"Why?" Kamui asked again, obviously too innocent to what 'training' meant.

"Because everyday is a life or death situation for all of us Lord-Protectors-in-training. We were made to fight endlessly and swear our loyalty over and over again up until we were teens. It had been too ingrained to us that our body was owned by another person. That we have no right over our own heart and mind. It was agonizing to think that all our lives… we were not made because we are wanted, but because we are needed as weapons, as tools… for the kingdom. It also means that friendship was not tolerated, much more forbidden love. We have no right to love anyone except our 'masters'."

Fuuma sighed again, not really knowing why he was telling the teen everything about his life. "And so… we trained and trained and trained, not really knowing if we would even be chosen to be one of the Lord Protectors. We knew that if we're not chosen, we would just end up to be some nameless and faceless soldier that the kingdom sends in different countries they were in war with. No one wants to be a tool to be killed in a battlefield without even experiencing what it's like to live as a human… And so all of us chose to do our best and persevered. I became the strongest out of all the trainees and so my fate had been sealed. I was to become the Lord Protector of the eldest prince of the country."

"It's lonesome…" Kamui looked down. Fuuma smirked and patted the teen's head.

"Well, I thought so too… Until I met _him_… my prince." Fuuma closed his eyes in reminiscence. "Our first meeting wasn't formal. I didn't even know he was the prince at the beginning. I have been fooled. But it's a nice experience."

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

"Hey, I thought you might want to see your master." A male trainee jeered at the loner raven who sat while leaning on a tree in the palace's garden. They might have been trained to forget their own self and emotion and live for their masters only but that didn't mean there weren't any bullies among them. "Here's the picture of your soon-to-be beloved Ouji-sama." And he dropped a picture of the lap of the raven.

Fuuma, the raven-haired male, looked the picture when he saw that his co-trainee was already out of sight. And his eyes widened. _Pardon him, but he thought all royalties were beautiful and handsome? _He continued to look at the picture of the plump blonde prince whose hair stuck out on all ends and had yellowish teeth that obviously needed some brushing. He had plump cheeks and slits for eyes, fish-like lips and a huge grin. Fuuma dreaded to think that this man would own him in many ways. _And he was supposed to only think of and love this person? _He suddenly had the urge to just die.

"What are you looking at?" A ringing voice from behind the tree he was leaning on spoke and woke him out of his musing.

Fuuma's eyes widened and he immediately stood up when he heard the voice. _He was the best of the best and no one was able to get near behind him without being detected. _He rounded the tree and his eyes widened slightly, if only because he was trained to hide his unnecessary emotion.

He looked at the male sitting on other side of the tree and Fuuma thought that he had just seen the most beautiful god. The other male stood up too, letting his raven hair flutter a little as he brushed his elegant robe off of any dirt. His amethyst eyes shone from behind his fringe and his pale complexion almost glowed under the shade of the tree. _He was truly gorgeous and enthralling._ And thus, Fuuma continued to stare even though he knew it was rude. The other male's chuckle snapped the taller raven out of it and made him glare.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?" Fuuma asked the unfamiliar creature.

The male slightly bowed in formality, right hand over his chest and left hand behind him, before he straightened up once more and smiled. "My name is… Kamui."

Fuuma furrowed his eyebrows. He had not heard that name before. "Sorry, but that name doesn't ring a bell. And besides, this place is off-limits. Please get out before I call some security."

Kamui looked surprised for a while before he started laughing, which made Fuuma growl in irritation. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, I was just surprised. No one has told me that line before. It was quite charming." And he continued chuckling.

Fuuma couldn't help the creeping blush on his cheeks and he growled even more. "Get out!" And that made the younger male stop.

"Are you serious?" His tone had gotten serious too, though he was still amused inside.

"Do I look like I'm joking, midget?" Fuuma asked in annoyance.

"Alright." Kamui said as he closed his eyes, deep patience and amusement on his feature. "But if ever someone thinks that the prince is gone, it'll be your fault, Fuuma Monou, the one who was supposed to protect the eldest prince of this kingdom." And even before the raven could react, he already started walking away as if nothing just happened. Kamui even hummed some tunes that Fuuma wasn't familiar with.

Now, the taller raven was left totally baffled as to what the 'midget' meant, but he let it be. He went back to the place he was sitting on earlier and slept. It was mid-afternoon, the best time to sleep. After some hours of sleeping, Fuuma was awakened by the loud siren. He immediately jerked up and looked around him, thinking it was an emergency of some sort.

When he approached one of the running military personnel, he found out that the prince he was supposed to have a ceremony with later in the evening was missing. It seemed some rebels were able to get their hands on the prince and was now holding him captive. And then he was called to the courtroom.

"Fuuma Monou," the King started and Fuuma bowed in one knee, indicating his reverence to the royalty. "It was reported that the prince was last seen this afternoon, talking to you. Don't worry, we don't blame you for this incident. We know that that idiotic son of mine was not happy with the setting of the Lord Protector System. He might have run away from the palace again." And he sighed in exasperation. "Did he say where he might be going? Or did he somehow leave some clue as to his location now?"

Fuuma furrowed his eyebrows as he looked up at the King. "I…I don't know what you mean, Your Highness. I still haven't met the prince, much less talk to him. The ceremony was about to be held later this evening and that was the time we were supposed to meet and exchange vows."

The King sighed again. He immediately knew that the prince didn't introduce himself earlier. "Kyouya, bring in a picture of the prince so Monou-san may be able to help in the search for his master."

The man named Kyouya bowed before he went off to somewhere. Fuuma waited for a while before the man came back and handed him a picture, which made his eyes immediately widen as he gaped at the raven-haired teen in the picture. He could see those amethyst eyes smiling even though the face of the male itself was showing no emotion.

_That bastard! _

If he was cursing his co-trainee who showed him a fake picture or if he was blaming the prince who didn't introduce himself, Fuuma wasn't sure. On the other side of the picture, a small signature could be barely seen. _Haruka Kamui Uesugi._

_Damn. He only knew the prince's first name! He didn't think that the bastard would give him his second name of all things! _

And before anyone could say anything, he was already running out of the courtroom and was immediately trying to find that annoying son-of-a-king. It took him almost three hours of going in and out of the palace, in the gardens, in secret basements and secret doors before he was able to find… no, not the prince, but at least he was able to find a clue.

It seemed a dozing guard was able to see the prince leave the palace earlier. And with that, Fuuma didn't hesitate to follow the direction he was pointed to. He would rake the entire kingdom and then he would scold that spoiled prince for all the trouble that he brought. _Not that he was blameless for it too…_

And yet, even after many hours of searching, Fuuma still couldn't find his prince. The time of the ceremony was coming closer and closer with every passing second and the raven was starting to think that the prince was doing it on purpose to delay the said ceremony. _So his prince didn't like him, huh…_

"Tch, that arrogant prince!" He exclaimed when he reached the outskirt of the kingdom, where the poorest and the most starved citizens lived. He initially thought that the prince wouldn't wander around here, at least initially.

"Oya, young man, what might you be doing in this kind of place?" Fuuma turned around when he heard the voice. The old lady approached him, a basket of flower in hand, and smiled. "Do you want to buy some of these flowers?"

Fuuma looked at the flowers and saw that most of them had wilted from lack of customer. He chose the freshest one and paid the old lady, not because he liked flowers in particular, but because he felt pity for the old woman. And he knew it was forbidden to feel anything for other people. _Well, it's not like it was affection he was feeling anyway._

The old lady chuckled. "Are you perhaps looking for someone?"

Fuuma furrowed his eyebrows for a while before he decided that he should ask. He brought out the picture of the prince, which was actually forbidden too because no one should be able to see the prince's face except those in the palace, and handed it to the old woman. "Have you seen this male around here?"

The old woman squinted her eyes as she took the picture. "Hmmm… He doesn't look like he's one of the people here…" And then she shook her hand, but she told him to ask a government official which was stationed in the area.

Fuuma thanked her and did what she said. At first, the raven didn't mind that the people would give him hope and then suggest to him that he go to this person or that person. But soon, he was starting to think that they were merely playing a prank on him. He was now relayed to the twentieth people and it was annoying him to no end.

When the guy told him that he should go and see Mr.-He-didn't-know-who, Fuuma lashed out at them. Not because he was really tired, but because he was frustrated. The guy who gave him the name immediately scrambled away in fright.

"You bastards…" He mumbled when he calmed down a little.

"Nii-san," Fuuma glared at a little boy who approached him so carelessly. The boy tiptoed and motioned him to lean down a little. Fuuma glared again but he still did. "Prince-sama is in our house."

"What?" Fuuma's eyes widened when the kid said those words.

"He told us not to tell anyone his whereabouts so the people were making you go in circles to lose you." The kid said shyly. "But I feel that Prince-sama will not appreciate it much…"

Fuuma could feel his blood boiling at the words he heard. _The people were the prince's accomplice? _How dare them!

"Nii-san, please don't get angry…" The kid said.

Fuuma sighed. "Where's your house?"

"There's no need. I'm here." A voice from behind made the two males turned around.

Fuuma was about to lash out and say many harsh statements when the prince graciously bowed and apologized even before he could say any word. The little kid giggled from beside the shocked Lord Protector and the other citizens chuckled a little.

"Your Lord Protector is either a worthy one… or a complete fool, Prince." The old lady from earlier uttered. All the other people had the same comments and Fuuma could only stare at them in confusion and silent anger.

Kamui straightened and walked towards him. "I am glad that you didn't give up on finding me. We thought that you will give up the search." Fuuma was still staring, more in confusion now than in anger, and the prince chuckled. "All the other Lord Protectors gave up after the six or seven people. They were too frustrated that they chose to just leave the place and search somewhere else."

Fuuma looked down. "So… you only messed with me." He laughed hollowly. "I'm yours anyway. So it's fine huh?"

Kamui sighed and before Fuuma could react, he already received a loud slap on the cheek. All the citizens groaned as they imagined what that felt like. The prince spoke in a serious tone this time. "Fuuma Monou, if you do not want to be my Lord Protector, just say so. It does not matter to me what you have learned in your training. All I want is someone who will serve me with all their mind and heart, not because they were forced by anyone, but because they chose to."

Fuuma could only stare at amethyst orbs in shock and pain. _The prince's slap hurt._

"If you think that you were forced to do this, then I do not mind if you leave now." Kamui said with determination. "And do not go saying your vow just because you deem it proper to do so. I want to know what you really feel."

Fuuma stared at him again. No one, not even his parents who gave him up, asked him that. No one had asked what he felt. _No one cared… _For his master to say such a thing… _Why only now..?_

It was true that he hated the kingdom, hated the fact that he had no control over his body, mind, or even his heart. But he hated it because he was forced. He hated it because he wasn't given any choice on the matter. _But now, this person… this beautiful prince in front of him was giving him a choice…_

"What will happen if I refuse to be Lord Protector?" He asked in a cool tone.

Kamui smiled, but not in his usual happy one. He was sad that he had to choose another worthy man to serve him. "Do not worry. I will ask the King for your freedom. You will not be a faceless man inside a military armor fighting for the kingdom if you refuse. I'll make sure that you'll be able to live a normal life starting from now on."

Fuuma sighed as he scratched the back of his head. He really wanted to just say he wanted his freedom. But just looking at the prince's barely concealed sadness was making him weak. "You know, if you will just have that kind of expression, then you shouldn't have offered the freedom thing, idiot prince."

"I am not having any kind of expression!" Kamui exclaimed/pouted.

Fuuma smirked. "If I serve you… will I still have my own will to think?" Kamui looked surprised for a while, but he smiled. And Fuuma thought he was really dazzling.

"I will not meddle with your mind or your feelings, Fuuma." He answered. "You can tell me what you think and feel, and I will not hold it against you for you are much of a human being as I am."

Fuuma's eyes widened yet again. It was such a new thing for him, to be called as a human being instead of the tool that the trainers said he was. He looked down, unsure of how he would feel at such an occasion, before he looked up and smiled at his prince. It was a new kind of feeling, to smile because he was happy.

He patted his prince's head tentatively, and marveled at the fact that Kamui seemed to like it. He knew that if ever someone else in the palace saw that, his head would be rolling down the pavement. "Shall we go to the ceremony then? We're late though."

"Nah, we can do it here." Kamui said as he looked at the moon hanging above them. It was the full moon right now and only now would the ceremony be possible. Not that it really had anything to do with the moon but it was still tradition. Fuuma nodded before he knelt in one knee. _Whatever his prince wanted… he'd do it without hesitation. Not because it was tradition, but because it was this particular prince who wants it._

Kamui looked at him with those amethyst charming eyes of his, full of warmth and kindness, and he felt a sword rest over his right shoulder. Where Kamui got that, he didn't know. _It seemed the prince did plan all of this. _"Fuuma Monou, from now on, you will offer me, Haruka Kamui Uesugi, your whole life, your whole body, and your soul. You will live for me, and no one but me." Fuuma noticed that Kamui never mentioned anything about his heart or mind, which made him silently glad.

"I bow before you and pledge my loyalty to you and only you, my prince, forever." He bowed on both knees this time and kissed the tip his prince's feet under the royal robe. "I will be yours forever."

Kamui seemed satisfied and he smiled as he sheathed the royal sword. "I trust in your eternal promise and loyalty." He used two pale slender fingers to pull Fuuma from the chin and raise his head. The older male closed his eyes as a chaste kiss fell on his lips.

The loud cheering and giggles of the crowd made the both of them pull away, though somewhat slowly. Kamui chuckled before he waved at the people whose cheers only got louder.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

"What are you blushing about?" Fuuma arched an eyebrow at the teen beside him.

"It must have been nice to k-kiss… the person you like." Kamui said, thinking of someone in particular.

Fuuma chuckled, but then he immediately felt that there where many people crowding in the doorway. "Oy, idiots. Do you really think you can hide your presence from me for a long, long time? You're reeking with killing intent, Sumeragi. The fur ball keeps on making giggling noises and I can smell the food you're carrying, idiotic blonde."

Nokoru chuckled and entered the living room together with Sakura. The two were carrying trays of food and drinks. Subaru entered after a while, glaring at Fuuma for acting so cozy with his ex-leader.

"Eavesdropping was fun!" Mokona exclaimed as he hopped from Subaru's shoulder and onto the table. Subaru sat in between Kamui and Fuuma, and the latter had to shift in his position to make way. Fuuma sighed. _That guy would never really change. _He might have been enamored by Kamui, but it was only because this Kamui looked exactly like his prince. _His prince… whom he promised to give all his life to…_

They put the tray on the table and the food smelled so delicious that Mokona immediately dug in.

"Oy, idiot!" Fuuma exclaimed when he saw Mokona taking a piece of everything. "Don't go grabbing everything!" That made both Sakura and Nokoru chuckle at him.

They ate quietly for a while, or not so quietly. Sakura chuckled at their lively behavior, especially Fuuma and Mokona. Subaru ate silently and would sometimes worry about Kamui again.

"So, what happened next?" Kamui asked Fuuma again. The taller male looked hesitant to open up first what with all the listeners, but he sighed and thought that it didn't make any difference since they all heard everything from the start anyway.

"I served him for four years, until he was nineteen and I was twenty." Fuuma said as he put down the glass that he was holding with slightly trembling hands. "He suddenly inherited the throne when he was nineteen because his father died of mysterious illness. After that, things went downhill for the both of us."

Mokona's ears drooped at that. Kamui wanted to comfort him but Subaru was in between them. Subaru patted Kamui's head when he noticed that the news made the teen sad.

"What happened?" Nokoru was the one who broke the silence. Sakura could only munch silently beside him, listening to the story with eyes full of sadness too.

"When I said he suddenly inherited the throne, that doesn't mean he was immediately the King. There are a lot of procedures before he could take the title. It usually takes months. That's when those things started. There was a sudden attempt at his life. Food poisoning… Of course, I was his Lord Protector so it was my job to make sure that everything he does is safe." Fuuma gritted his teeth. "I was able to prevent him from eating anything that has any poison, but the fact was that it was my negligence that resulted to that. Of course, we all tried in desperation to know who was behind the attempted assassination. But we couldn't find anything, not a clue or whatsoever. Same things happened again. There were bombs in his room, poison in his food, and there were even small presents addressed to him without any return address. And there were nothing good inside those things. It was frustrating to say the least…"

"That only means one thing though." Nokoru said with a serious face. "The mastermind is inside the palace too." Fuuma nodded.

"We suspected as much. But we still don't know who it was. There are hundreds and hundreds of employees and staffs in the palace, excluding the soldiers. It could have been anyone. And then there's war going on between two powerful kingdoms. Shinken Kingdom, the prince's kingdom, was in between those two powerful nemeses. The two kingdoms were both trying to gain our alliance so they can use the kingdom as vantage point to attack the other kingdom. Our Kingdom is a neutral kingdom though and the prince refused to join the war. And that only made things worse for us since both of them considered the Kingdom as enemy." Fuuma clenched his fists. "Of course, Kamui never left my side and he firmly believed that I will protect him. That is, until I was framed for a crime I didn't commit."

**.**

**.tbc.**

**.**

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**That's it. I know it will get all serious again. But don't worry too much about it. Please don't forget to review! ˆoˆ**


	19. Chapter 19

**Ren-sama's Notes:**

**Thank you, everyone, for your reviews on the last chapter! I also thank those who favorite this fict! You don't know how much that means to me. It makes me cry in happiness! I hope you enjoy this chapter too! ˆoˆ**

**And oh, belated Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!**

**.**

**Chapter 19**

"Of course, Kamui never left my side and he firmly believed that I will protect him. That is, until I was framed for a crime I didn't commit." Fuuma's voice echoed throughout the living room and no one talked for a while. "It was frustrating that one of the witnesses to that supposed crime… was the prince himself." His breath hitched a little and Fuuma waited for his quick heartbeat to slow down again before he sighed deeply. "I was sentenced to be exiled, not only from the kingdom, but from the dimension itself. That's the reason why I want to go back. I want to clear my name and be with my prince's side again. I don't care about anyone else, as long as my prince believes me…"

All of them were waiting for the raven-haired male to continue talking when they all suddenly felt it. _A very dark and heavy feeling…_

Shiro immediately opened his eyes when he felt the strong presence that was somehow similar to how his late wife felt though a bit different and saw that all the others were also in full alert. "Is it the feather?"

"Yes." Mokona was the one who answered, eyes wide open for a while before it went back to slits. "But it somehow feels a little different…"

Subaru felt dread at the presence instead of longing this time. _This was not any normal feather… This was… the Core. _His eyes widened when Kamui suddenly stood up, looking dazed. "Kamui?"

"It's… calling me…" The teen answered, still dazed at the presence. Subaru immediately grabbed his arm and pulled him down on the couch.

"Don't follow it." He said when Kamui looked at him with confused expression. "It's the Core."

"Well, shouldn't we try to at least capture it?" Fuuma asked tentatively, but Nokoru was the one who shook his head at the suggestion. All of them could feel that the presence was too strong for them to take on right now, what with their confused minds and hearts. The Core would only surely devour them all in darkness if they ever try to approach it.

"Is this the feather that we've been feeling earlier?" Shiro asked for he wasn't sure anymore. The feather that they all felt earlier when they entered the house wasn't so dark like this. _But how could it feel so close even though he felt that no one approached them..?_

"Subaru, I think I need to go." Kamui suddenly said. Subaru looked at him, asking for the reason. But he could only shake his head. "I don't know why… But I can't ignore it… It's… calling me…" Subaru gritted his teeth while raking his mind for anything that could make Kamui stop. He could still remember the fear that the dark Kamui put inside his already weak heart.

"_You're too stubborn for your own good, Subaru. Sooner or later someone will definitely go and snatch him away from you…"_

"_I hate you, Subaru… And I'll make sure to make Kamui hate you too… Then you'll find yourself shattering because of your own stupidity, Sakurazukamori."_

"_They're coming… They will take Kamui away…"_

"Kamui…" He voiced, unable to find anything to make Kamui stay. Instead, he did the only thing he could at the moment. Kamui's eyes widened, and so were the eyes of everyone else, when Subaru suddenly hugged the amethyst-eyed boy so tight they all thought the onmyouji would crush him.

"S-Subaru..?" The younger male voiced unsurely when Subaru remained motionless, hugging him as if the onmyouji's life depended on it.

"Don't go…" Subaru buried his face on the crook of Kamui's neck and hugged him even tighter, making the younger male blush in embarrassment. All the others pretended to be doing something else.

Kamui was about to answer again when everything before him went dark. He couldn't feel Subaru's warmth anymore nor could he feel anyone at all, and it suddenly felt so cold and lonely.

He stood up, for he realized that he was sitting at nothing but darkness.

"Subaru?" He called in uncertainty. He knew it wasn't the darkness that he always dreamed of. This wasn't the one where he met the other Fuuma and the supposed friends that he had forgotten. _This was different, _that_ even he knew. _"Mokona? Nokoru? Fuuma? Shiro?"

He looked down and saw, to his surprise, that he could see his body even though everything around him was filled with darkness.

"Good evening, Kamui." Kamui turned around when he heard the voice that was so similar to his own and saw, to his surprise and wonder, someone who looked just like him.

"W-Who are you?" Kamui asked as he looked at his look-alike who only smirked.

"I am Kamui." Kamui blinked at the answer the other gave him so the other Kamui explained further. "I am also what you all call the Core, or the Dark Kamui. Though no one would want themselves to be called like that, right?"

Kamui nodded and the Dark Kamui smirked again. "Where are we?" The kind one asked.

"Hmm… how should I explain it to you..?" The dark Kamui looked thoughtful for a while before he answered. "We're in a place that is neither an ordinary dimension nor a place inside your consciousness. But it is also both of them." Kamui blinked at him, obviously looking lost. "It's hard to explain. But it's just like a really huge kekkai that is both a dimension and a place inside our consciousness where the only ones allowed to enter are you and me."

"Are you the one that appeared before Subaru?" Kamui asked again. And the playful aura of the dark Kamui immediately disappeared at the mention of the name, which somehow hurt Kamui a lot. "Do you really hate Subaru that much?"

"Yes." The dark Kamui's eyes darkened as he answered. "I am your unconscious resentment for him, Kamui. I live just for the sake of hating and destroying him, for having my revenge because he destroyed us. He abandoned us just when we needed him the most. He rejected us when we were the most vulnerable. He's one of the reasons why you broke your soul, Kamui." He smirked at the reaction he got from the teen.

Kamui knew that what he was hearing might actually be lies. But he couldn't help but feel the rage and deep, absolute hatred that the being in front of him was emitting through his aura alone. And it hurt him so much to know that the Core's hatred for Subaru was real. _Was it really true then? Did he really destroy himself because of Subaru's rejection?_

The dark Kamui chuckled darkly. "Don't worry too much, Kamui. He's not the sole reason for your self-destruction. Fuuma was a huge chunk of it too. And of course, your fellow Seals who died for the sake of the Earth also mattered."

"I…" Kamui wished he could just change the core's feelings for Subaru. He liked Subaru so much and he didn't want Subaru to be hurt. "I like him…" He looked at the Core with pleading eyes. "Please don't hurt him…"

"Hmmm… That's quite hard…" The dark Kamui smirked. "Let's see then. Do you know of the one Subaru loves?"

Kamui felt his breath hitch at the sudden question. He already knew that the person Subaru loved wasn't him, but it still felt like his chest has somehow shattered. "I… It's… Seishirou… I think… I don't know him though…"

The dark Kamui's smirk widened. "So you remember after all, even if it's just his name." Kamui nodded. "You want to make Subaru happy, right?" Kamui's eyes widened at the question before he nodded again, this time eagerly.

"Even if he's only using you as a replacement for the lover that he loved so much?" The dark Kamui asked again. "Even if he will never love you back no matter how hard you try? Even if he will never reach out for you if ever you're in so much pain? Even if he will leave you the moment he gets tired of you?" The real Kamui's expression was filled with pain and he started trembling slightly, but he still nodded.

The dark Kamui walked forward and hugged his original counterpart before he whispered to the other's ear, "Then all we have to do is give him his lover back, right? If you finish collecting all the feathers, all you have to do is call me. And then I will resurrect your dearest Subaru's lover back. How about that?" He pulled away from the hug just as he smirked at the pain etched in the real Kamui's wide amethyst eyes and gorgeously shocked expression.

Kamui knew he shouldn't be selfish. Subaru needed his lover back, and this was the chance to make him truly happy. _If this was true, then he just had to do it, right?_

"Is… Is that possible?" The kind teen asked again, doubting the words of his other half. "Subaru said that resurrecting the dead is impossible…"

"It's forbidden, yes. But impossible?" The dark Kamui smirked as he lightly shook his head. "I don't think so. We have the power similar to the Gods, Kamui. We can destroy the world and recreate it again from nothingness. That's the kind of power we have. Nothing is impossible for us."

The Core lifted up the other Kamui's chin to look at his teary, anguished eyes before he asked again. "So, do you like that? I will give you the three feathers that I have if you agree."

Kamui's eyes widened. "R-Really?" He asked in uncertainty. _On top of Subaru having his lover back, they wouldn't have to look for the feather anymore? Did that mean they didn't have to fight the Core anymore, too?_

"There's a condition though, Kamui. So I want you to think about it first. I want you…" Dark Kamui cupped Kamui's cheeks with both hands. "…to come and disappear with me."

Kamui wanted to say something as he looked at those cold and merciless amethyst eyes, but he found out he couldn't find his voice. _He couldn't even move. _The shock paralyzed his whole body as the words sank inside his head.

_Could he sacrifice himself for Subaru's sake?_

"I'll be waiting for your answer, Kamui." The dark Kamui smirked as he marveled at the original's vulnerability. "The moment you get the 9th feather is the moment I will ask for your answer. If you refuse, I will destroy the Sakurazukamori with my own hands. There are many ways to destroy that man without attempting to physically kill him. If you agree, then all you have to do is come with me. I will resurrect not only Subaru's lover Seishirou but also Nokoru's lover Suoh. Since I am kind enough to you, I will even let them return safely in their own dimensions. And then we will both disappear. Everyone will be happy, right?"

Kamui looked down. "You mean… Subaru… will be happy even without me..?"

"Of course, he will. He already told you that there is only one person he loves, right?" The dark Kamui asked and Kamui nodded reluctantly. "There is only one person important to him, and that person _isn't_ you, Kamui. He is the type of person to need you only when he's comfortable with it. But if he feels that you're getting too attached to him, he will act coldly and push you away. That man will do nothing but hurt you, Kamui. You should realize that sooner or it'll be too late for you to recover, just like what happened last time."

Kamui whimpered at the statements and the dark Kamui hugged him again. "Don't worry, I'm here. I will make sure to realize your dream… our dream. I will make the both of us disappear. And no one will be able to hurt us again, not even the invincible Sakurazukamori."

Kamui couldn't help but cry as he digested the other's words. He knew that what the dark Kamui said was true. Subaru indeed told him that there was only one person he truly cared for and loved. And that he really abandoned Kamui and rejected him at his most vulnerable state. And Subaru also pushed him away when he became too attached to the man. _Did that mean that Subaru never really wanted Kamui to become attached to him? Did that mean that Subaru would act coldly to him again and push him away if he told the man of his feelings?_

_Did that mean Subaru never truly cared for him?_

"The 7th feather is inside this house, in the basement." The dark Kamui uttered right before the other's ear. "We will meet again after you get the 9th feather, Kamui. And then you will tell me your decision. Surely you know what to say, right?" He smiled and kissed Kamui's forehead before he disappeared.

And once again, Kamui found himself alone in the darkness. But unlike earlier, the darkness this time seemed to engulf him. It felt so cold and scary now, as if his very life was being sucked out of him. _"Subaru… what should I do?"_

"S-Subaru…" His voice cracked even though it was only a whisper. His knees lost their strength and he fell on the dark ground with a thud just as the tears fell from his eyes one by one again.

_If it would make Subaru happy… then he wouldn't mind doing it…_ _sacrificing himself all for the sake of the onmyouji…_

But that didn't change the fact that it was breaking him just thinking about it… _"Subaru… I…" _He hugged himself as he broke down and sobbed. _"I love you…"_

He didn't know how much he remained motionless while sobbing, but he knew that something warm made him stop. It brushed his consciousness but he knew that warmth all too well. He looked up as he wiped his tear-streaked cheeks and looked for any sign of movement. But nothing happened. And when he thought that it was maybe just his imagination, he heard it.

"Kamui…"

He stood up and looked around in the darkness, at least to know where the familiar voice was coming from. But it was to no avail.

"Kamui..!"

He looked up again just as everything went bright. He groaned as the light hit his eyes and he immediately closed them.

"Kamui..?"

"S-Subaru..?" He asked tentatively as he slowly opened his eyes. Gloved hands cupped his cheeks and warm breath brushed his face.

Subaru was much too relieved that Kamui finally opened his eyes. He was hugging the boy when Kamui suddenly lost consciousness. The fear he felt could not be put into words and still bound him deeply even now. He hugged the boy again, tightly, and kissed his hair before he whispered to the boy's ear. "Are you alright now?"

"Yes…" Kamui answered quietly as he hugged Subaru back with the same tightness and buried his face on the crook of the onmouyji's neck, which made Subaru furrow his eyebrows. It seemed the boy was not okay after all. Although, the older male was just so glad that the Core's presence was gone now…

"It's because you were hugging him so tight that he collapsed from lack of air, Subaru." Mokona judged and Subaru immediately gave him a death glare. The fur ball immediately hid himself behind Nokoru, who laughed at the explanation. Shiro was beside Kamui but his expression remained stony. It seemed he was pondering deeply about something. Fuuma sighed as he felt that at least ten years was cut from his life span.

Sakura, at that moment, entered the living room with some first-aid kit, medicines, and other things. It seemed she was in too much of a panic that she immediately brought back everything without looking at them first. She even brought back a pregnancy kit with her.

"I'm okay, really." Kamui looked up at Subaru and smiled before he pulled away from the hug.

Subaru recognized it, the smile that Kamui often used back when he still had his memories. _It was that fake smile that he hated to see. _He gritted his teeth. It seemed Kamui was trying to hide whatever happened with that fake smile of his.

"Kamui, did you, by any chance, meet the Core?" He asked. And by the way Kamui's whole body immediately tensed at the mention of the said entity, Subaru and the others immediately knew that he indeed met the other half of him. "You're scared… What did he tell you?"

Kamui looked down to hide his fears. _He didn't want to disappear… _"N-Nothing…"

"Kamui." Subaru's voice was calm but it was forceful. "Tell me." He appeared calm on the outside but he was seething inside. _For Kamui to act like that… That bastard probably said some things about him in the past which he had no memories about…_

"N-Nothing… really…" Kamui gripped Subaru's trench coat in silent plea, still afraid to look up and see the older male's expression, though he already knew just from the other's cold voice. _Subaru was angry. _"I-I'm sorry I wasn't able to catch him…"

"Don't force him to talk, idiot." Fuuma was the one who talked. He could see that whatever happened, it still gripped Kamui tightly that he refused to ever voice it out loud.

Subaru sighed in frustration as he hugged Kamui again. He wanted so much to protect the boy. _But how could he fight something that he couldn't even see? _He knew that the dark Kamui was here earlier for his dark and cold presence was so immense it almost swallowed them all. But the fact was that they couldn't see him, unless he willed himself to be seen.

His breath hitched when Kamui fell limp again. Even before he could see what happened though, Shiro was already on it.

"Don't worry, he just fell asleep from exhaustion." The kodan voiced as he looked at Subaru and then the others. By now, he was already sure of his assumption, though it seemed not one of his companion has realized it yet. He judged the presence earlier. Of course, it was mainly and mostly Kamui's. But there was something else to it. And now, the question was 'who'?

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Subaru was absentmindedly brushing Kamui's hair gently with his left gloved hand while his right hand held a book about exorcism which he borrowed from Sakura. Kamui lay on his sides with his head on the onmyouji's lap. The older male sat in the sofa while reading silently.

Nokoru and Fuuma were sitting on the sofa across the two ravens and Mokona was sleeping on Nokoru's lap. Fuuma's eyes were closed and his arms were crossed over his chest. Nokoru was absentmindedly patting Mokona's furry body as he watched Kamui sleep. Shiro was sleeping beside Subaru's feet. His head was even pillowed on one of the onmyouji's feet. They had finished eating, without Kamui of course, and Sakura was currently in the kitchen, washing the dishes.

"I hate to say it, but Yuuko is right." Nokoru voiced after a while. "It seems the Core is starting to finally get serious. He's already targeting Kamui."

Subaru stopped reading but he didn't look nor did he act like he heard anything. He was deep in thought. He wanted to get back that part of Kamui's soul but at the same time he feared the day when it would have to be returned. _After all, it contained Kamui's wish to disappear… not to mention all of his forgotten memories. _

He had always wished that Kamui remained the same as he was now. But he knew that once his memories return, he would once again become the cold and aloof teen who could only shatter in silence. _Just the thought of Kamui in pain was enough to break him apart… _His thoughts were cut when he heard Kamui groan in his sleep. He immediately put down his book and focused on just brushing his fingers on the younger raven's hair. The teen nuzzled on his lap before heaving a contented sigh.

Nokoru and the others watched as the onmyouji's cold eyes turned really warm as he fondly watched the teen sleep on his lap. It was still an unconscious action, but they knew that Subaru's feelings for Kamui were beyond simple caring and friendship now.

"Who's there?" Shiro's voice rang in the room, totally waking Mokona up. They all looked at the corner of the room where the lamp shade was placed, and saw, to their surprise, a yellow-orange teddy bear with white little wings on its back moved in an attempt to hide itself once again.

"What the–?" Fuuma blurted out when he saw the moving object, or rather, creature.

Subaru looked at the teddy bear with mild interest before his attention went back to Kamui once again, not even stopping to think about the strange thing.

"Who are you?" Mokona asked. "Or rather, what are you?"

The teddy bear who was trying to hide itself earlier immediately flew over to their place and pointed a finger to Mokona before speaking in a very strange accent. "You have no right to ask me that, fur ball!"

"What did you say!? Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona crossed his little arms over his chest. Nokoru chuckled at the strange exchange and Fuuma sighed before going back to his own musings. Shiro simply muttered something about 'strange things' before going back to sleep.

"Kero-chan!" They all looked at the doorway where a very surprised Sakura stood, wide-eyed and looking between the teddy bear and the others. "Why did you come out?! I told you to stay inside the room!"

"Don't worry, Sakura-san." Nokoru spoke for the rest of them. "We've encountered much more strange occurrences and things to even care about the talking teddy bear's appearance now, not to mention existence."

"I'm not a teddy bear!" Kero shouted in his little voice. "I'm Keroberos, the Guardian of the Sun! And besides, your companion is strange too!" And he immediately pointed at Mokona. "This creature is way too powerful to be a normal animal!"

"Eh? I thought Mokona is a chubby rabbit!" Sakura's eyes widened as he looked at Mokona.

"Mokona is not a rabbit! Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona huffed.

"Whatever, just stop shouting at the top of your lungs." Fuuma yawned before closing his eyes again.

"I knew it. You people are not normal after all." Keroberos said, scrutinizing every last one of them. And then his eyes darted to Shiro. "I don't even think you're part of this world." And then to Kamui. "And that kid is the strangest one here. He's too powerful and yet he's also the weakest among you right now."

"How can I be both the strongest and the weakest?" They all looked at Kamui when the teen spoke. It seemed the loud shouting woke him up. Subaru glared at the fur ball and the teddy bear for waking the teen up with their bickering before taking his book and reading once again, ignoring everyone.

"Well, I can't really explain it well, but that's how I feel about your presence." Keroberos crossed his arms over his chest as he answered the earlier question.

Kamui sat straight in the sofa and looked at Sakura with a strange expression. "Umm… can we look into your basement..?" His statement made his companions look at him with curiosity. Subaru put down his book and looked at him with an odd expression.

Sakura looked confused for a while before her expression turned uncertain. "I… I don't know… My father's work is there…"

"I promise I won't let anything go into disarray." He answered. "I just want to look for something that might be there."

"You're looking for something?" Keroberos asked and Kamui nodded. "Now that I think about it, your companions also tried to look for something in the second floor."

"Can I know what it is that you're looking for?" Sakura asked, before looking totally alarmed.

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: It pains me that I have to die at the end of your story… so I might as well have my revenge on you now, Ren. (*sudden murderous aura*)

Subaru: If you ever dare lay your hands on Kamui, I'll personally hunt you down and kill you myself. (*menacingly dark and murderous aura*)

Ren-sama: (*sighed*) If I ever kill Kamui, huh…

Yue: (*sips his tea without a care in the world*)

Host-san: (*sighed*) This room's atmosphere is totally dark and cold right now. So please, people, have some mercy and tell the two lovebirds here that if ever they kill the author, there won't even be an ending waiting for them, happy or not!

Ren-sama: And so, please don't forget to review! (*purposefully ignoring the dark auras in the background*) ˆoˆ


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

"Can I know what it is that you're looking for?" Sakura asked, before looking totally alarmed. "Don't tell me it's the Book of Clow!"

"Don't worry, it's not something as fancy as that." Mokona answered immediately before anyone could. "We are looking for Kamui's feathers."

Subaru glared at him again for telling other people so easily of their circumstance. They didn't know if Sakura and Keroberos knew something about the feather, since they also emitted so much magic. _If that kind of offhanded slip of the tongue ended up endangering Kamui in any way…_

"I think you should only speak when asked, fur ball." Fuuma voiced when he saw the dangerous flare in the onmyouji's eyes. "Or else we'll have to return you to that bitch as a minced meat." Mokona pouted before he sat beside Nokoru to be comforted. The blonde immediately patted his head. Shiro continued to listen silently, still neck-deep in thought.

"Umm… so this feather…" Sakura voiced in uncertainty. "Is it white… with strange pink patterns?" Their attention immediately perked up at the accurate description before she said the next words. "You can't! That's one of my father's researches!"

Subaru growled and Kamui was just in time to talk. "Then can we have it after the research is done?"

"Eh?" Sakura blinked before she thought about it. "But–"

"Sakura-san, I'm home!" A voice from the front door made the girl forget about the rest of her sentences as she answered him before rushing to the door herself.

"Oh, my. We have many visitors today." A brunette man beamed at everyone, looking a little exhausted but nevertheless happy. From the looks of things though, they immediately knew that the man was Sakura's father even if he has a formal, not to mention strange way, of calling her. The father who looked so young to be one greeted everyone with a very kind and warm smile. "Are they your friends, Sakura-san?"

"Umm…" Sakura trailed off, not really knowing what her relationship with the men was.

"Kinomoto-san, right?" Kamui asked politely. The man nodded so the teen continued. "We are here because we want to have the feather on your research… but only after you've finished researching on it…" He bowed deeply and Mr. Kinomoto actually looked surprised.

"U-Uhmm…" He looked at Sakura, silently asking for an explanation, before he looked at Kamui again. "Well, I don't mind… but… it was supposed to be submitted to the National Museum after I am done. It's an archaeological artifact that my team and I discovered in the ruins of a Hidden Village called Suna."

"…Kinomoto-san," Nokoru ushered the man to sit beside them and Sakura sweatdropped because her father was asked to sit in his own house by a mere visitor.

When all of them were seated, Nokoru began his explanation. He knew that Kamui was too blunt in his words and it somehow unsettled their host. But they needed that feather no matter what. Of course, he twisted his story a little to make it appear more believable.

Mr. Kinomoto chuckled. "You don't have to make it sound possible. Yuuko-san told me that a group of young men will appear in my doorstep one of these days and ask for that."

"Wha–?" Fuuma gaped at him for knowing the Bitch of Dimension. "How did you–?"

Sakura chuckled too. "…Because Oto-san is Clow Reed-san's half soul." She continued her explanation when her companions seemed lost. "It means that Clow Reed-san is no longer alive as of now. His soul split into two – my Oto-san and Eriol-kun."

"What does that have anything to do with the witch?" Subaru was the one who voiced their question. His arms were crossed over his chest as he looked at them quite coldly. If they knew about Yuuko, then surely they knew Kamui's real circumstance, right? _Surely they would understand, right..?_

"Yuuko-san was Clow Reed-san's very close friend." Mr. Kinomoto answered.

"I see." Nokoru answered. "Then surely you understand our real circumstance, right? We must have that feather at all cost." He was smiling but his eyes were dead serious. Shiro looked at him quite oddly.

Mr. Kinomoto sighed. "Alright, you got me. I won't give it to the Museum as part of national artifacts. But I do hope that your intention for it is not something bad."

"Yes, that feather is very powerful." Keroberos said. "If it gets into the wrong hands, then–"

"I own that feather. It's a piece of my soul." Kamui interrupted his words, making Subaru furrow his eyebrows. It's so unlike Kamui to rudely interrupt other people when they talk, at least the Kamui now wasn't someone to do that.

"Oh." Sakura was the one who answered. "No wonder your presence feels familiar to me."

"Alright then. I'll give it to you after I finished researching on it." Mr. Kinomoto said with a smile, not at all affected by Subaru or Kamui's coldness/rudeness.

"Don't you dare damage it." Fuuma said in his usual annoyed tone but everyone knew he was not angry or anything like that.

"Do you want some help in your research?" Nokoru asked the brunette man, who only blinked at him. "I mean, the owner of the feather is here. Kamui and all of us know more about the feather than what you can research on your own."

Mr. Kinomoto chuckled before he shook his head. "I can't. It' won't be my research anymore if I take my information from anywhere other than the object that I need to investigate. Though thank you for your kind thought…"

"You can stay in the guest rooms for tonight." Sakura said when Mokona whispered to her that all of them came from a different dimension. She readily believed the fur ball because Yuuko was someone from a different dimension too.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

"Is there something wrong?" Subaru asked as he and Kamui went inside the room together with Shiro. The kodan simply listened silently as he lay on his side on the carpeted floor beside the bed. And note that there was only one bed.

Fuuma and Nokoru together with Mokona were in the other guest room so Subaru finally had some peace and quiet. He even had the privacy now to ask Kamui about what happened.

"Nothing… I guess I'm just being impatient again…" Kamui answered, though in reality he was not so sure about wanting to get all of his feathers back anymore. He wanted to help Subaru find happiness with his lover once again. _But he didn't want to disappear… It scared him so much…_

Subaru sighed as he patted Kamui's head. It seemed the teen wasn't ready to tell him anything just yet. But he would be patient. He would wait until Kamui would open up to him. He didn't want to force Kamui or anything like that.

"Shall we explore the town tomorrow then?" The onmyouji asked offhandedly, before surprise engulfed him. _Was he really asking Kamui to go out tomorrow? _He tried to clear his throat to fight his immediate embarrassment, not to mention the small blush that wanted to creep up on his cheeks.

By Kamui's surprised and excited expression though, Subaru knew he could never regret what he just asked. "Can we really?! It will be the first time for me to see a town without having to find a feather…"

Subaru's expression warmed and Shiro even saw a slight smile on his lips, a smile meant only for the boy in front of him. "You have to wake up early tomorrow then." Kamui nodded excitedly, momentarily forgetting his fears and worries, and went to the bed.

Subaru, though, could only continue to stare at him as the other tucked himself in the covers. _Would they really share one bed..? _He knew it was kind of pathetic to worry about that now when ever since they started their journey, the two of them had always slept beside each other – except during the time when he purposefully ignored the amethyst-eyed teen. _Then why was it kind of embarrassing now..?_

The onmyouji remembered his dream from earlier and heat immediately engulfed his whole body. _How annoying. How was he supposed to sleep beside Kamui if his mind was filled with those images? _

Kamui just looked so beautiful in his dream, not that he wasn't beautiful in real life. He looked at those expressive amethyst eyes, that pale and creamy skin, those succulent lips, his slim neck… _What's happening to him..? _He remembered the kisses… the moans that escaped Kamui's lips when he touched the boy…

And he gritted his teeth in frustration when he realized what he had been thinking. _Damn… _

"Subaru..?" Kamui titled his head to one side, silently wondering why Subaru was still not moving from his position beside the door. Shiro smirked when he realized the quite indecent things that the onmyouji might be thinking. _It seemed Subaru's actions and feelings were not so unconscious after all…_

The onmyouji cleared his throat before he sat on his other side of the bed and started undressing. He might have been wearing his usual Sakurazukamori attire the entire journey even when he's asleep, but that was because he hadn't experienced sleeping in a warm and soft bed in all those times. It seemed quite rude now to taint the clean cover with his attire.

"I'll take a bath first." Subaru said before he walked into the bathroom with only his pants on. He even took off his gloves, which was rare even for him. It seemed Kamui's presence was making him feel warm and secure, away form the darkness that continued to eat him from the inside out.

"_Do you know? The sun is so bright because it eats and burns itself up from the inside out without hesitation…" _He remembered his sister's words and he couldn't help but grit his teeth.

"Kamui…" He whispered the name as he closed his eyes and the warm water showered all over his body. _"You don't have to do anything for me…"_ It took him at least thirty minutes to bathe. Kamui soon bathe after he was done, obviously imitating his actions.

Subaru sat on his side of the bed once again as he toweled his wet hair. Kamui was still in the bathroom and Shiro took that opportunity to warn the Sakurazukamori.

"Subaru," the kodan called with his raspy voice. The onmyouji looked at him and arched an eyebrow. "I think we should be more careful. You should maintain your high guard. Don't let it down even for a second, even if you're together with our other companions."

"Why are you saying that?" Subaru asked, not that he would let his guard down in any way any time soon.

Shiro's mismatched eyes looked at another set of mismatched eyes before he spoke. "I'm not yet so sure about it, but… The Core is much, much nearer than we think he is. Not to mention he's… also a bit different from how the real Kamui feels. It's like…"

Subaru's eyebrows creased at the warning and he was about to ask something when Kamui chose that moment to come out of the bathroom. He realized that Shiro didn't seem like talking about the Core in front of Kamui just yet, especially after the incident earlier, and refrained from talking.

Kamui smiled at the two, feeling so refreshed. He looked at Subaru and marveled at the fact it was the first time he saw the man wearing something else other than his black trench coat and his overall Sakurazukamori attire. The man was wearing a black turtle neck with long sleeves, courtesy of Sakura's father who refused to let the guests feel uncomfortable by making them sleep in their own clothing. The teen also saw for the first time that Subaru wasn't wearing his lack gloves, since he just got out of the shower. He took a quick glance at the man's large hands and long slender fingers. He noticed how pale Subaru's fingers were; how delicate they seemed despite the man's strength. He even saw a red inverted star tattoo on the back of the onmyouji's left hand.

For a while, Kamui wondered what it was before he decided that it wouldn't hurt to just ask the man himself. But at that time, Subaru immediately covered his left hand with his right.

Subaru saw the teen's curious glance at his hands and, eyes widening and heart racing fast, he immediately remembered to cover it with his right hand before the said teen could notice what it was. But it seemed it's already too late.

"Subaru, what's that star?" Kamui asked, though he immediately regretted it when he noticed that Subaru stiffened. "W-Well, you don't to tell me anything…" _anything at all…_

Subaru's eyebrows creased when he saw how the teen's beautiful amethyst eyes clouded in pain before they immediately recovered. Kamui smiled and walked towards him before the teen decided to lie on the bed.

Shiro saw everything but he didn't look like he noticed anything. He saw how Subaru got nervous and even panicked when the teen saw the star on his hands. The man himself didn't look like he was panicking or anything. But his eyes said it all. Kamui, on the other hand, was hurt at the fact that Subaru tried to hide something from him again. He sighed as he let himself be pulled into sleep. It seemed the couple still had a long, long way to go before they let each other touch their wounds. But before anything could even pull him, literally or figuratively, Subaru lay on his side of the bed and faced the teen, whose back was on him.

"Kamui," Subaru called quietly. Both Kamui and Shiro pretended to be asleep. Subaru repeated the name, a little louder than earlier. "Kamui…" But the teen still didn't answer, making the man sigh. He knew that Kamui wasn't sleeping, if the upset aura he kept on emitting was any indication.

_But he's afraid… No, he's terrified… _If Kamui knew who he really was, would the teen hate him? Would Kamui think of him as someone not worthy of being called 'human'? Or worse, _would Kamui feel terrified at his presence if he learned what true creature lies underneath the façade of the man who calls himself Subaru..? _

Just thinking that Kamui would fear him was enough to make Subaru feel helplessness and deep fear. _He didn't want Kamui to hate him… But above all that, he didn't want Kamui to fear him…_

And all of a sudden, a voice from earlier rang in his mind.

"_Kamui isn't as weak as you think he is, you know."_

He breathed a deep sigh, which he never knew he was holding. _Who knew the fur ball would be the one to make him feel comfortable at this point? _He would have to thank him tomorrow, or better yet, treat him some takoyaki which he seemed to like so much.

The onmyouji sighed again. _He might as well just say it…_ "This star was proof that I am the Sakurazukamori, the coldblooded assassin of the Sakura tree... The Witch of Dimension already took the real contract tattoo so this one is a normal tattoo now… but it still reminds me of who I am." He said quietly, too quiet actually that one would have to strain his ears to hear it. _But it seemed Kamui heard it nonetheless… _just basing how his earlier stiff shoulders slowly relaxed.

Subaru closed his eyes. _Kamui relaxed… _But did that mean..? Did that mean he was forgiven? Did that mean he was accepted as he was? Or did that mean Kamui didn't believe him? Or… did that mean Kamui finally fell asleep because he didn't want to talk to the onmyouji anymore..? _Please, not that one… _And he was surprised when he felt movement beside him, just in time for his eyes to open and see beautiful amethyst eyes swimming with so many emotions he's never seen Kamui held before.

Kamui turned around just in time to see the pained expression on the older man's face. Subaru opened his sad mismatched eyes and looked directly into amethyst ones. Kamui wasn't sure about the exact reason for Subaru's sadness, but he was sure it was his fault. Surely he was surprised to know that Subaru was killing people, but he knew that that fact wasn't enough to sway his feelings about the man. _It just wasn't enough to stop the waterfall of emotions that he felt for the man… nothing was enough…_

He cupped Subaru's cheek with his right hand, much to the older man's surprise, and smiled sadly. _It hurt him that Subaru had to be in so much pain with him… If only the man would find happiness… _

_If he was willing to die for Subaru, then…_

Kamui knew that it wasn't the happy ending he was hoping for, because he still feared the thought of disappearing. But if it would be able to make a contented smile, no matter how small, grace Subaru's lips, then he didn't mind dying. _He would swallow the fear and the anguish… He would–_

"What are you thinking about?" Subaru's quiet question stopped his musing and made him focus on the curious expression worn by the man in front of him. _Just mere inches from him…_

"I… don't find your identity frightening." Kamui answered, making Subaru's face light up considerably.

"…Really?" The older man asked in uncertainty. Kamui smiled, a real one this time, and nodded. Subaru didn't know what to feel at first. But then he started to feel his heart warm up and beat a little bit faster than normal. His throat felt like there's lump inside it and he gulped in order to find his composure again, which he never did. He moved his left hand and placed it on top of Kamui's right one. "Thank you… Kamui…" Their gaze never faltered as Subaru closed his eyes and leaned closer.

Kamui reddened a lot, especially remembering the dream he had with the older man, and instinctively closed his eyes just as the soft touch of the older man's lips met his slightly quivering ones. To say that it was a sweet and fluttery kiss was an understatement. Subaru's lips were as soft as he remembered them from their first kiss.

"_Even if he's only using you as a replacement for the lover that he loved so much?"_

The dark Kamui's voice earlier immediately rang inside the teen's head in the middle of the kiss and made him gasp, just in time for Subaru to slide his tongue inside the other's mouth. The older male explored the teen's sweet cavern in deliberate slowness and gentleness, taking his time to fully taste everything. Kamui felt like his heart would burst from too much tingling and emotions.

"_Even if he will never love you back no matter how hard you try?" _

Kamui didn't know who made the unmistakable sound of a moan as the kiss deepened, a lot deeper than their first shared kiss during that one fine morning in the rabbits' house. Subaru reached out behind Kamui's head with one hand and brushed his hair while his other hand slid behind the teen's waist to hug him. Kamui could do nothing but circle his arms around the onmyouji's neck in an attempt to pull him even closer, not that there was any space in between them anymore.

"_Even if he will never reach out for you if ever you're in so much pain?"_

Subaru, seemingly realizing what he had been doing, immediately pulled back though his forehead rested against Kamui's. "I… got carried away… Sorry." His cheeks had a slight tint of red in them from heat and embarrassment.

Kamui chuckled before he gave the older male a quick peck on the lips, his own cheeks blushing madly. "Good night, Subaru." The last thing he saw before he closed his eyes and hid himself in the covers was Subaru's wide eyes, obviously in surprise, and the unmistakable tint of red on his cheeks darkening.

"G-Good night, Kamui." The onmyouji cleared his throat. Kamui, even if he couldn't see the man, knew that Subaru was fighting back his blush. He silently chuckled under the covers, at least until he felt the soft touch of Subaru's lips on his hair.

"_Even if he will leave you the moment he gets tired of you?"_

Kamui sighed in contentment. It didn't matter if Subaru felt that he was someone who could never be compared with Seishirou. It didn't matter if he was someone who could never gain the love of the one person he loves the most. It didn't matter, not at all, if Subaru decided that the teen was not important for him. _Because as he felt the warm arms that encircled him in a hug, he was sure that he would do anything to make Subaru happy… even if it meant losing to his one-sided dead rival Seishirou. And also losing his life… _

And with that, Kamui knew that he had already decided.

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Ren-sama: Okay, that is so cheesy.

Kamui: (*calmly sipping his tea with Yue and Host*) Whatever, you're just jealous because you have no one to do that to you.

Ren-sama: (*murderous aura then grins sadistically*) I wonder what I will make you dream of next? If just appetizer is enough to make you lose it, then I wonder what the main dish can do? Since I am the author, I know that Subaru is really huge… In fact… (*whispered to Kamui*)

Kamui: (*blushed madly*) You..! How did you know that!?

Yue: (*calmly sips tea, not bothering to say that the Sakurazukamori is just a tree away and is already fuming at the fact that the subject of the conversation turned out to be his d~~k*)

Host-san: And as the author was chased out of the room by millions of Sakura petals, just like how Senbonzakura does his handiwork, I am here now to thank you for reading and reviewing. And also, please don't forget to leave your comments. (*smiles and bows to an invisible audience*)

**ˆoˆ**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

_I want to be the one to take care of you… _

_Your pains, your sadness, your worries, your fears… I want to take them all away… I want to relieve you of them… please allow me to do so…_

_I want to take all your pains and sadness…_

_I want to see your smile…_

_I want you to live…_

_But I just don't know what to do…_

Subaru woke up with a start, still hearing the anguished voice inside him pleading to be heard. The agonizing voice turned into a mere whisper as his mismatched crimson and emerald eyes gazed upon a sleeping raven whose head was pillowing on his right arm instead of the pillow underneath them.

_Kamui…_

The onmyouji used his left hand to caress the younger male's hair for a while before brushing his knuckles on Kamui's cheek. The teen sighed in his sleep, obviously liking the gesture, and Subaru couldn't help but smile warmly. _If only moments like these would last forever…_

He remembered how he kissed Kamui last night and sighed, cheeks slightly reddening. It seemed he was becoming more and more attracted… or intoxicated actually… to Kamui. It wasn't the first time he lost it and kissed the younger male. He reasoned the first time with his inability to control his humanly urges. _But this time… he has no excuse._

The onmyouji sighed before he used the peaceful time to ponder about his feelings, his _real _feelings, and not the feelings that he thought he had. He shifted as he tried to calm down his fast beating heart.

_Was he feeling something for Kamui?_

_Yes…_

_Was it admiration? Infatuation? Physical attraction? _

_It's more than that…_

_Was it love?_

Subaru closed his eyes as he tried to think about it more. He knew that if he was wrong, he'd end up hurting Kamui again. He knew, or at least he thought he knew, that he still had feelings for Seishirou. But to love Seishirou and Kamui at the same time was just so… so _selfish_ of him.

Kamui whimpering in his sleep broke the onmyouji's line of thought and he immediately locked the younger male in a warm embrace. He used his right arm to pull Kamui closer and brush his hair while his left hand circled around the teen's waist to lock him up in Subaru's arms. Kamui nuzzled on the juncture of Subaru's neck and shoulder before heaving a sigh and continuing in his sleep. The older male couldn't help but shiver in quiet delight, his eyes widening when he realized that another part of his body was also delighting at the act, before he kissed the younger raven's hair, inhaling its scent in the process. He sighed, trying to compose himself again.

_Kamui always smelled good…_

He couldn't help but think that Kamui has become someone who supported his whole existence. He knew now that he couldn't exist without Kamui. He knew that if ever the younger male left him, he'd surely, without a doubt, _die_… The teen was like an intoxicating drug to him, prolonging his blissful existence in every way possible. Not to mention that Kamui acted as his light, for he would have long succumbed to the darkness that tries to swallow his whole existence if it weren't for the teen's warmth right next to him all the time.

Subaru closed his eyes again when he realized it. _He's falling for Kamui… deeply._

He's such an idiot for not realizing it sooner. He liked being with Kamui so much that he actually missed the guy even though they were together. He liked being in contact with Kamui, physically or emotionally. He liked inhaling Kamui's scent, hearing his voice, touching his hair and face, locking him in a warm embrace, _kissing him… and more…_

He wanted to protect Kamui more than anyone else. He wanted Kamui to see him more than anyone else. He's afraid that Kamui would hate him or would be afraid of him. He felt like he'd die if ever Kamui got hurt because of him. He felt that his whole world would collapse if Kamui chose to stay away from him. He could feel his eyes burn in anger at the mere thought of Kamui spending his time and being so close to someone else. _Just the thought of it was already enough to send him into a blind rage._

He pulled Kamui closer and inhaled his scent even more. He's afraid of so many things when he should be the powerful and untamable, undying Sakurazukamori… _all because of Kamui…_

He let out a shiver as he opened his eyes again and looked down at the wisp of smooth raven hair. _So he loved Kamui after all…_

Even now, he could feel his heart beating faster just because Kamui was nuzzling on him. He could feel his breath hitch once in a while for feeling the seeping warmth that Kamui had even with the clothing. He could feel his cheeks warm up and his stomach flutter at the thought of the kiss they shared last night. _So really, how dumb and hard-headed could he get to not realize these things sooner?_

And now that he did realize it… _what should he do? _He knew very well that he couldn't let himself fall in love again. He shouldn't fall in love with Kamui of all people. _He, the tainted, bloodthirsty assassin who could only defile Kamui and pull him into the darkness… _He wanted Kamui to remain as pure and innocent as now. He wanted the teen to be his light, not to swallow Kamui with his darkness. _And yet… and yet, he knew he couldn't and wouldn't let Kamui leave him… _

Shiro sighed for the umpteenth time. Ever since earlier, he could feel the aura that the Sakurazukamori has so unguardedly kept on emitting. He could feel Subaru's fluttery aura earlier that immediately turned into a surprised aura, into another set of fluttery aura, into a depressed aura, into a fluttery aura, into an anguished aura. _How the hell could the so-called emotionless Sakurazukamori feel so many emotions in a matter of seconds!?_

The kodan had learned about Subaru last night, during the time they spent in the living room while Kamui was unconscious. Mokona talked about everyone non-stop and it helped Shiro assess the situation further. He already warned the onmyouji about their circumstance regarding the Core but he knew it wasn't enough, nor was he sure about his findings yet.

"You're awake after all." Subaru's usual cold voice took the kodan out of his musing as he was forced to answer.

"Yes, though it took you so long to realize it." Shiro said as he put his head in front of his paws in a way that most dogs did. _Well, what with his constant harassment on Kamui ever since last night, Shiro was even surprised that Subaru managed to remember he was in the room too._

"Hn." Subaru grunted, making Shiro smirk because it lacked its normal coldness. _It seemed the onmyouji's contentment right now was enough to warm him up._

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Kamui's eyes slowly opened as he realized he had been sleeping in a rather uncomfortable place, the school rooftop. His black school uniform was even a little creased because of too much sleeping. And as he took in his surroundings, his eyes immediately widened.

The sun hung up in the sky and the white clouds drifted aimlessly. Everything was so bright and he could hear some birds chirping. The wind felt really nice.

_Wasn't he with Subaru just before he fell asleep?_

"This is Tokyo, Kamui." Kamui immediately turned around when he heard the voice and his breath hitched when he saw the Dark Kamui not far from him. The latter was standing while leaning on the wall beside the rooftop door. The real one could see those eyes burning with silent hatred even now, and it was saddening.

But aside from that, there were too many things that he wanted to know. "Tokyo?" _What's that? _Though the sound of it somehow made him feel really nostalgic…

Dark Kamui smirked before he slowly walked towards the real Kamui. "This is the place where you came from, the dimension where you and Subaru came from."

Kamui's eyes widened at the statement before he turned around and gazed at everything. So this… _This was his home..? _He looked at the buildings and also the houses not far from them, the city and the people down below. On the part near the horizon, he could somehow see a tall tower. _That tower somehow felt really daunting… not to mention if brought too many emotions deep inside his heart just at the sight of it._

"That's Tokyo Tower." The Dark Kamui said from behind him. "That's the place where you killed Fuuma."

Kamui looked at the other male with wide eyes and he couldn't help but whimper at the sudden information. He knew that it was him who killed his friend whom he only met in his dreams. _But how or why, he didn't know… _"Why..? Why would I kill him..?"

"Do you want me to show you?" The dark Kamui smirked at the dread that settled on the other's face.

"Kamui..!" Kamui's eyes snapped open just as he heard his name being called out loud.

"Kamui..?" Subaru was slightly shaking him. "Are you alright?"

"Subaru..?" He blinked wearily before he sat up, not realizing that Subaru was somehow straddling his waist.

The onmyouji gritted his teeth as he hugged Kamui tightly. He and Shiro were just talking about mundane things earlier and suddenly the dark presence of the Core alerted them. His first impulse was to see if Kamui was okay, only to realize that the teen's breath was hitching and his forehead was covered in cold sweat. Subaru didn't wait for another second and immediately shook the sleeping teen until Kamui opened his eyes.

Kamui peered up from Subaru's quite suffocating hug and saw that the onmyouji's expression was pained. _It was always like this whenever he was involved… _Somehow, he always ended up hurting the older male even without even trying…

"Subaru, I'm alright." He smiled to assure the onymouji and Subaru managed to somehow listen and lessen the suffocating action. He knew that he killed Fuuma and that fact hurt him a lot. But he also heard Fuuma's side on it, that the guy actually wished himself to be killed. That's the only thing preventing him from actually feeling so depressed. _Of course, Subaru was another reason preventing him from feeling down…_

"Good morning, Kamui." Shiro greeted from beside the bed. The teen chuckled at him before he greeted the two males back.

"Good morning, Subaru, Shiro." He said just as the door to their room opened with a loud bang.

"Kamui!" Mokona barged in without any invitation with Fuuma and Nokoru on his heels, or rather, paws. "Are you alright?"

"We felt the Core earlier." Fuuma voiced in a more subdued manner than the fur ball, not even flinching at the sudden glare they all received from the pissed off Sakurazukamori.

"We're alright. The presence has completely disappeared now." Shiro was the one who answered, seeing as Kamui wasn't even awake when it happened and Subaru was far too annoyed to speak. The kodan sighed. He knew why Subaru was so pissed. _The trio just barged in, totally ruining the mood between him and Kamui._

Nokoru and Mokona sighed in relief and Kamui couldn't help but chuckle at their attitude. Just then, they all heard Sakura's voice from downstairs saying that breakfast was quite ready.

When they entered the kitchen, however, instead of seeing only two people and a teddy bear, they saw another guy whose scowl could rival Fuuma's or Subaru's.

"Who are you?" The guy asked and Sakura immediately berated him, saying she already told him for the hundredth time now.

She then turned to Kamui and others and bowed in apology. "I'm sorry that this idiot is just too rude. He's Touya, my older brother." She smiled when they didn't seem offended by her brother. "Shall we all eat now? Oto-san has already left because he still has to attend a lecture about archeology."

Touya continued to glare at each of them though, as if sizing them up one by one. He knew very well that Sakura's visitors were not just ordinary people and it was making him anxious. How the hell his sister knew such powerful, and most likely dangerous people, he would never know.

And thus, they all ate with quite an intense atmosphere and suffocating silence. Though it seemed Kamui and Mokona, and Sakura of course, didn't seem to notice at all.

Fuuma and Nokoru were pissed that they were being sized up by someone they didn't even know while Subaru was pissed that the guy kept on glaring at him and Kamui. The three older males knew that they met the guy in another dimension as the kind Yukito's husband, and it seemed there was no change in his attitude even in a parallel world.

"So, where will you go while waiting for Kinomoto-san?" Nokoru asked Subaru in an attempt to lessen the hostility in the air.

Subaru looked at him with a serious face, though it seemed his mood had suddenly changed for the better, much to the blonde's amusement. "Kamui and I plan to explore the city." And his eyes were daring them to say otherwise or add anything at all.

"Cool! Can Mokona go too?" Mokona said as he was munching food, totally oblivious of the earlier warning.

Nokoru chuckled. "We'll go on our own, right, Fuuma?" Fuuma's eyes narrowed when he was purposefully grouped together with them. It seemed the blonde knew that all he wanted to do all day was sleep, sleep, and sleep.

"Eh? But Mokona wants to go with Kamui!" Mokona pouted and Subaru's glare only worsened.

"Why not?" Kamui asked. "We can take him with us, right?" He looked hopeful at Subaru and the latter could only grunt in assent.

"Don't give us any trouble, fur ball." Subaru said while Mokona started jumping up and down the table due to happiness.

Sakura couldn't help but chuckle at the sight and Touya immediately assumed that Subaru and Kamui were lovers. Shiro sighed, knowing that he would end up in Fuuma and Nokoru's company for the entire day. Of course, Subaru didn't mind him coming because he wasn't that much of a trouble, seeing as he wasn't at all talkative and not at all childish. _But having two 'pets' while on a date certainly wasn't appealing, right? _And so, the kodan surmised that it would be better if Mokona was the only one to go with them.

"By the way, there will be a festival tonight at the Mitsumine Shrine. We can all go there if you want." Sakura suggested and received some nods. Subaru's eyebrows creased as he tried to remember why the name was so familiar to him. And then it dawned to him. _Yuzuriha's Shrine had the same name._

After a while, Touya grudgingly lent them his, as well as some of his father's, clothes and the four people and two 'pets' left without any particular destination in mind.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Subaru and Kamui, while hugging Mokona over his chest like a grocery bag, walked the busy street of the city. They just finished breakfast and Subaru immediately said that they needed to get going. Kamui couldn't help but feel that Subaru was somehow quietly excited by the exploration.

And after some minutes of walking in the more residential area of the place, the three ended up in the main street where most buildings and infrastructures were for commercials uses.

The younger male couldn't help but admire everything he set his eyes on. The huge and towering buildings, the crowded streets, people with different attires, the noisy cars and buses, and the busy shops, and even the by-standers. He had never seen these kinds of things before, at least not as far as he could remember.

The younger raven looked at the omyouji and saw that Subaru was merely walking beside him as if everything was normal. _Did that mean that this place was somehow similar to their dimension? _And then his dream earlier came back to him – _the city, the school, the buildings and houses, and the tower…_

"Kamui? Are you alright?" Mokona voiced suddenly, making the teen look down at him in question. "Your grip on me is getting tighter."

"O-Oh. Sorry, Mokona." He smiled.

Subaru looked at Kamui meaningfully before his eyes darted in front of him once again. "Do you want to go anywhere in particular, Kamui?" He asked in a quiet voice.

"Eh?" Kamui blinked at him before furrowing his eyebrows. "You mean some place in particular?" When Subaru nodded, the teen couldn't help but furrow his eyebrows even more. He never knew what kind of places this dimension had so he couldn't really say. And besides, his experiences after he lost his memory was still so scarce that he didn't even know what to expect in a city like this one.

The younger male looked up when Subaru patted his head. "Sorry for asking such a question." Kamui blinked when he saw a small smile in Subaru's lips, a genuine one. The teen couldn't help but smile back. "Shall I decide then?" Kamui nodded in enthusiasm and the onmyouji immediately took his right wrist to lead him. The two skidded through the crowd and ended up in some park.

Mokona let out an amused tone while Kamui's eyes widened in amazement. It's the first time he saw something so beautiful.

There were children playing in some playground not far from them, shouting and giggling to one another. There were some families and groups having a picnic under the shades of the trees too. Flowers and grasses decorated both sides of the pavement they were in. In the middle of the park was a huge fountain and many people were seated beside it. There were many benches too. Together with the bright morning sun and fresh air, everything looked just so peaceful. It's something that not even the Kamui before the Promised Day had ever witnessed.

Subaru couldn't help but feel his heart flutter in delight just looking at Kamui's happiness. He wanted Kamui to experience these things, peacefulness and calmness, enjoyment and leisure. _The Kamui_ could only see these things from afar, having the whole world as his burden. That Kamui, even as a kid, could only focus on his duties and destiny. _Now though, Kamui was just a free soul… He could do anything he wanted to._

Subaru just wished that the Dark Kamui wouldn't show up now.

As Kamui gazed at everything, his mind was slowly forming a not-so-unconscious wish. He would enjoy these things and every moment of it together with Subaru as much as he could. _Because there might not be a second time to this anymore…_

Mokona hopped from Kamui's chest and played in the field, not even minding the fact that some of the kids had stopped what they were doing and were now looking at him rather meaningfully.

"Mister, Mister." Kamui looked down to see a small girl tugging at his coat. "Is that rabbit yours?"

"Uh, rabbit?" Kamui looked at the girl before looking at the thing she was pointing at. Mokona was now hopping together with the other kids and Subaru couldn't help but curse under his breath. "Ah, yes. Mokona is mine."

"Can I play with him please?" She asked hopefully. Kamui chuckled before nodding. The girl brightened up before running towards her playmates just as they started their game together with the 'rabbit.'

"Are you sure that's alright?" Subaru asked beside him, looking at the annoying fur ball with a glare.

Kamui chuckled again. "Mokona's enjoying himself. That's all that matters." He smiled at Subaru and received a pat on the head in return.

The two started walking in idleness, circling the entire playground in the process. They weren't talking but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. They both liked each other's company and that's enough for the both of them.

After a while, they started walking on the grasses too, side by side, when all of a sudden, several sprinklers on the ground started spurting water like a fountain. Kamui almost jumped in surprise while Subaru hissed as his coat started to get drenched in water. They looked at each other, not knowing what to do for a while.

Subaru was starting to get drenched in water and his hair was already wet and dripping. His handsome face was scrunched up a little and Kamui couldn't help but laugh. Subaru, who could see Kamui like a little kitten drenched under the rain, couldn't help but chuckle too. The younger male started running in the sprinklers, playing with the water, and the onmyouji followed in a more mature pace.

Mokona, from afar, grinned when he saw how his two charges were having a good time by themselves. It seemed Subaru was more relaxed now than when they first met. _That time seemed so long ago now… _Not to mention that he was chuckling, though subdued, of all things. It seemed his feelings for Kamui were much, much deeper than any of them ever realized.

Kamui and Subaru knew that they could catch a cold from being drenched so the two took their time sitting on the ground while having the bright sun dry them. "Shall we leave this place now?" Subaru said after a while. Kamui nodded, still chuckling.

"Kamui, Mokona's hungry!" Mokona said after a while as he was once again carried by the teen. The fur ball knew that if ever he wanted something, he should ask Kamui instead of the Sakurazukamori. If Kamui said yes, then there was no way Subaru could say otherwise. It's just that simple.

Subaru knew that Mokona had been using Kamui as a shield to get what he wanted for a while now. First, the annoying fur ball asked Kamui that he wanted some takoyaki and so the three went to buy some. Subaru still had his patience back then because he promised to himself that he would treat the fur ball today. But then Mokona wanted some ice cream so the three couldn't help but buy some. And then the fur ball was hungry again?

The onmyouji glared at Mokona and the latter did his best to plead Kamui instead of focusing his attention to the murderous aura of the person just beside them. As expected, Kamui nodded to him because the kid was just so kind, _so unlike his lover._

"But…" Kamui trailed off, stopping in his tracks, and Subaru couldn't help but stop as well, looking at the teen with silent concern.

"Kamui?" He called and the teen looked up at him.

"Subaru… I…" The onmyouji arched an eyebrow when the teen slightly fidgeted in his position. "I want that…" He pointed to the nearby shop where there was a huge cake mascot asking the customers to come in.

Subaru narrowed his eyes. It seemed the thing that attracted Kamui wasn't the food per se, but the mascot that was giving people flyers in front of the shop.

"You want to eat cake, Kamui?" Mokona asked, brightening at the thought of eating the sweet stuff. Kamui shyly nodded before looking at Subaru with innocent puppy eyes.

The corner of the onmyouji's lips twitched in amusement at the teen's utterly adorable expression and he sighed before he nodded. "Shall we?" Both Kamui and Mokona's expressions brightened and they grinned at one another just as the onmyouji brought out his wallet and looked if he still had enough money. The money was courtesy of Sakura and, a little hesitant, Touya.

Once they neared the shop, both Kamui and Mokona hurried up to the mascot and tried to see what he was giving the people. The mascot gave the teen a flyer of the 'Cake Eating Contest' before patting the teen's head.

The three chose the table just beside the glass window and Subaru took the flyer to see what it said. He smirked evilly as he eyed Mokona while reading it. It seemed the fur ball would be of use to them somehow. It's a free cake eating contest with a time limit. And if ever someone in your group managed to eat it within the time limit, all your next orders would be free as well.

Mokona gulped when he saw the glint in the Sakurazukamori's eyes while looking at him. _Well, as long as he wasn't such a useless chaperon, then he guessed it would be okay… or so he hoped so._

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: (*fidgeting and blushing*) I can't believe it… I'm actually having a date with Subaru!

Ren-sama: And it's all because of me. (*grins smugly*)

Kamui: Thank you! And now I see that Subaru loves me.

Subaru: (*wanted to die in embarrassment*) Tha-That's…

Kamui: (*leans closer to Subaru*) I thoroughly accept your feelings, Subaru.

Subaru: (*blushing madly; clears his throat*) Well… I guess this isn't so bad. (*trying to act like his usual self in vain, especially when Kamui hugged him tight*)

Host: Don't mind those two love birds and please review, everyone!


	22. Chapter 22

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Thank you for everyone's support in Subaru and Kamui's date! Yeah, I know it's cute too! I hope there would be some lemons between them, but it's kind of impossible to do. (*sigh*) Anyway, this is the next chapter! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**Chapter 22**

The trio managed to spend their time eating free cakes and tea, black coffee in Subaru's case, because the fur ball managed to eat two whole cakes in the span of two minutes, even setting a new time record for the shop which anyone doubted would be broken by another any time soon.

Subaru, sitting across from the teen, watched as Kamui messily ate his third slice of cake. The older male took a tissue from the table, just beside where Mokona sat while eating his eighth slice aside from the two whole cakes, and gently wiped the teen's mouth with it. Kamui continued munching and even smiled happily at the onmyouji's action. Mokona grinned knowingly again behind his cup of tea.

In the end, Subaru ate the littlest because he was more concerned in Kamui's well-being than his own appetite, though he never really liked sweets that much in the first place. _But seeing Kamui eating cakes happily was making his heart flutter in silent delight. Not to mention it's making his more indecent side more alive than usual…_

_If only these moments with Kamui would last forever…_

After a while, the three left the shop with full stomachs and happy hearts. They continued walking in the busy street, skidding through the crowd with idleness that could only be brought upon by the cakes, until they reached another park.

"Ooh." Mokona voiced just as he whistled at the sight. This park was a lot different than earlier.

This one had a huge lake in the middle of a garden of flowers and many couples were boating on the water. There were trees circling the square lake, where benches were located. There were even butterflies flying here and there, and Mokona started hopping again, though not going anywhere far.

The two males sat on one of the benches just as they watched the gleaming water under the sun with all its occupants boating in the middle.

Subaru couldn't help but feel that he did not belong in the place. It was just too bright and peaceful, unlike the place where the Sakurazukamori was supposed to be found – the darkness and coldness of the silent night. He closed his eyes as he sighed. He knew he wasn't supposed to be enjoying this scenery while so many of his victims failed to even see the light of day anymore. He knew he had no right to spend this precious moment with Kamui because he was someone who could only taint everything and leave blood in his wake.

"Subaru?" Kamui's voice brought the onmyouji out of his musing and he looked at the younger male with curiosity.

"What is it?" From the corner of his eyes, Subaru could see Mokona picking out flowers in the garden even though there was a sign which said no picking of flowers. _The idiot…_

"Are you okay? You somehow look upset." Kamui asked in concern as he shifted, sitting closer to the older male as his hand gripped the sleeve of the older male's coat unconsciously.

The action didn't escape Subaru and he couldn't help but smile in Kamui's subtle ways of comfort. "I'm alright." He patted the teen's head again before kissing his hair, making the younger male blush a little. And that was enough to take his mind off from depressing things. "Do you want to go boating?" Kamui's face perked up at that and he immediately nodded.

"Me too! I want to go boating!" Mokona immediately hopped towards them, much to Subaru's annoyance. _Couldn't they go and do something without an annoying childish chaperon for a change?_

And after some minutes, the three were already in a small boat, with Subaru as the one padding through the water. There was a roof so they couldn't feel much of the sun's heat, adding to the fact that the air felt cool.

Kamui looked like an excited child and the Sakurazukamori could watch him forever just being like that. The teen was chuckling in excitement together with a much annoying fur ball who was starting to piss him off even more. _Getting all of Kamui's precious time and attention… _He sighed. But as long as Kamui was happy, then he didn't mind. _At least not that much…_

"Ah! That!" Mokona pointed at a particular small boat with only one occupant. This boat didn't seem to be in the water merely for fun. The boat was filled with many snacks and beverages and the other boats would sometimes go near it to buy something from the vendor.

"He's selling foods while in a boat." Kamui said in amazement and Subaru sighed before he padded nearer the vendor.

Since they just finished eating cakes, the three decided that snacks were enough for now. Mokona bought a really big chip, courtesy of Subaru's wallet, while the two other males bought two chips and a popsicle. Since it had two sticks, Subaru decided to split it apart for him and Kamui to share. The younger male started licking and popping the thing in and out of his mouth while sucking it and the onymouji cleared his throat as he willed himself to look away, lest he wanted to embarrass himself in front of Kamui by having an uncontrolled bodily reaction.

After a while, they settled on just idly letting the small waves of the water carry them wherever it wanted, not that they could go anywhere what with the brick wall filled with flowers as the lake's enclosure. There were falling leaves from the trees to the lake and they all watched in amusement as the leaves floated on the water, creating tiny ripples in it in the process. And Subaru thought that he wanted to try something nice for Kamui to see.

Kamui was watching the leaves fall from the trees' branches contentedly when the voices of people in the other boats and others beside the lake managed to catch his attention. Just as he looked at them, he saw, to his amazement and surprise, hundreds and hundreds of cherry blossoms falling down from the sky in idleness. It's as if it was raining with pink cherry blossom petals and the teen could only gape, wide-eyed, in amazement. His huge amethyst eyes reflected the little falling beauties with contentment.

Subaru smiled in satisfaction when he saw how Kamui reacted to his little stunt. It was amusing how his power had other uses than simply taking the lives of people. _And if Kamui appreciated this side of him as well, he knew that he would never leave the teen's side in as much as forever…_

Mokona could only gulp as he watched the beautiful falling petals. He knew how in one mere second these lovely pink petals could turn more than deadly and kill everyone here in the lake right now. But of course, seeing as Subaru would rather kill himself than hurt Kamui, that thing would be impossible to happen.

"Did you do all of this?" Kamui asked as he continued to gaze at the beautiful scenery in front of him. By now, many petals were already on the water and many more were still falling from above. It looked as if the lake was painted pink with all the cherry blossoms floating on it.

"Do you like it?" Subaru asked a question of his own, knowing full well that his question already had his answer in it. Kamui giggled, a scene that made Subaru almost lose his balance in the boat, before the teen nodded eagerly. The onmyouji had never seen the teen act like that before and it somehow took him by surprise. The sudden urge to glomp the teen and do some indecent things to him were making it hard for the Sakurazukamori to concentrate.

"It's very beautiful… These same petals were the ones I saw when I first woke up." Kamui closed his eyes as he reminisced, effectively forcing Subaru out of his indecent musings. "In that room, there was a balcony. I was there and when I opened my eyes, there were many cherry blossoms falling down the sky too." Mokona and Subaru both remembered that time as well. It was the first time Kamui awakened without his memories. _Those petals were made so that everyone would fall asleep. _And yet, it was so ironic that Kamui woke up for the first time since their journey seeing something that was supposed to bring sleep to everybody.

Now, Subaru was thankful that he didn't make those petals so that it would slice up everyone into mincemeat. Kamui could've woken up only to see some bloody scene before him. "Would you still like it if you see it killing people..?" He asked quietly, not wanting to spoil Kamui's fun but also couldn't help but voice his fear.

Kamui opened his eyes again and looked at Subaru's mismatched eyes. "I can't say I will like it… But it is your power so I find it very beautiful, regardless of what it does. I will accept it because it is part of who you are."

Subaru cupped Kamui's cheek with his gloved hand and kissed his forehead. "You don't fear it..?" He whispered in a pained voice just beside the younger male's ear. Kamui shook his head and the onmyouji couldn't help but hug him tightly. "Thank you…" And it sounded as if Subaru was thanking Kamui for more than just one thing.

Mokona clearing his throat immediately snapped the two out of their intimate hug and the Sakurazukamori glared coldly at the fur ball for interrupting them. Kamui merely blushed at the fact that he somehow forgot Mokona's existence for a while there. The sakura petals had ceased from falling and the lake looked completely pink.

"Since you both are in a _date_ and all, shouldn't you watch some movie next?" Mokona asked after they finished their renting time and were now walking in the park again.

"Movie?" Kamui tilted his head to the side, completely not knowing what that meant. Nor what the word 'date' meant for that matter.

Subaru's eyes, on the other hand, widened at the mention of the 'd' word. He really wasn't thinking of it as such just earlier, but he truly felt that Mokona shouldn't be with them. _Did that mean he was unconsciously considering this as date?_

"Watching movie is something you do with your lover, Kamui." Mokona explained, both he and Kamui were totally oblivious about a certain onmyouji's inner struggle as well as self-consciousness and embarrassment.

"Movie is nice, I think." Subaru suddenly said, making Kamui and the fur ball look at him with different expressions. Mokona was grinning while looking at him with narrow eyes, as if teasing him without saying anything at all – which annoyed him a lot – and Kamui looked in between curious and excited. "Do you want to see a movie?" He asked with his cool tone before he sighed in relief at the automatic nod from Kamui.

"I think popcorn will go together with the movie!" Mokona voiced excitedly when they entered the movie theater. There were many people lining up for four different movies and none of the trio had any idea on what kind of genre each movie would be.

Subaru immediately glared at the fur ball and the latter immediately used Kamui as a shield by pouting cutely at the younger male. The teen in turn looked up at Subaru with cute innocence. "Can we have some popcorn?"

_If Kamui wanted it… _It didn't matter if Mokona was the one who thought of it. If it would make Kamui happy too, then it's worth the annoyance and the effort – not to mention the money that would be thrown. The onmyouji sighed in resignation as he walked over to the popcorn stall. He didn't know where both Kamui and Mokona could get the appetite to eat just about anything edible. They had just finished eating before they all went to the theater and now they wanted to eat again. _Or maybe it was just that fur ball who wanted it and Kamui was just too kind to resist those annoying puppy, or rather, fur ball eyes._

"Here's the popcorn." Subaru said when he neared them. Kamui smiled sweetly at the onmyouji and uttered his gratitude for it, immediately making him forget about his line of thought.

The older male patted Kamui's head. And just from the way the teen immediately blushed – no matter how slightly – at the contact, Subaru couldn't help but smile. It was barely visible on his lips but both Kamui and Mokona were still able to see it.

"You're smiling a lot now, Subaru." Kamui pointed with his own smile. He took some popcorn to his fingers and put them in Subaru's mouth, which the latter chewed slowly while trying to hide the small blush of embarrassment. Mokona's grin widened at that, much to the onmyouji's annoyance.

Subaru cleared his throat and looked at the posters of movies to be shown at that hour. "What movie do you like to watch, Kamui?"

Kamui looked at his older companion first before his eyes darted towards the posters which promote the movies. "Those… are movies? Aren't we already watching them now?"

Subaru was about to explain when Mokona was the one who voiced the explanation. He was initially on Kamui's chest, but he jumped on the teen's shoulder. "Kamui, those are only posters of the movies that people watch in the theater. A movie is like moving pictures that portray a story. Actors and actresses act their roles to make a story and enable people to watch them in a big screen. Or so Yuuko-san said."

Kamui blinked. It was still a little confusing but somehow he got the gist of it. He looked at Subaru who patted him on the head again before he looked at the posters again. "Is that a nice movie?" He asked when he settled his eyes on a hugging couple. The couple, one male and one female, were hugging one another as if their life depended on it. Their eyes were watery and shining, like how posters usually portrayed the main characters.

Subaru's left eye twitched as he looked at the poster, but he didn't comment. He never liked those sappy movies which only turn out to be a major cheesiness and annoyance. _Not to mention that those movies always have themes not suitable for very young audiences. And parental guidance is recommended._

"Is it not good?" Kamui asked again, face slowly losing the smile that it had.

"No, no. It's fine. It's fine." Subaru immediately patted Kamui's head and padded towards the lined up people together with his two companions. "We'll line up here so you shouldn't eat all that popcorn yet." He glared at Mokona when he said the last statement. Thankfully, Kamui was too busy looking at other people to notice.

After some minutes of waiting and lining up, Kamui and the others were able to find themselves a good seat at last. Subaru chose the seat in the balcony so they wouldn't have to stretch out their heads in order to see the screen. He sat on the chair nearest to the aisle while Kamui sat on the chair to his left. Mokona sat on the teen's lap. The fur ball didn't have to pay for the ticket since the staff thought he was just a mere stuffed animal.

Subaru's two companions kept on eating the popcorn up until the screen turned white and the paid ads showed up. Kamui immediately stopped eating, staring at the huge screen with wide eyes. Subaru already anticipated the questions, and he wasn't disappointed when the teen asked them. "Why are they inside the screen? Why are they so big?"

"They aren't inside the screen, Kamui. What you're seeing now is nothing but a record of what they filmed. They're big because they are projected largely." Subaru explained calmly. He looked at Kamui then, expecting the boy to nod. But all he saw was the teen's confused face. The onymouji smiled and patted the younger male's head, only to realize that he kept on doing the action unconsciously. "You don't have to know all those things, Kamui. It's alright if you just enjoy what you see."

"Do I annoy you by asking too much?" Kamui asked, a little afraid of the answer he would hear. But instead of answering, Subaru only shook his head and smiled again. And more than any other kind of answer, that one satisfied the teen the most.

The movie has just started when a couple sat on Kamui's other side, with one chair as a space between them and the teen. Subaru noticed them too but didn't put much attention to them since the movie was already starting. He wanted to watch it because he wanted to be able to answer whatever question Kamui might ask later. He knew it might be a little arrogant of him but he wanted to be the one to answer Kamui when the latter asked and not some fur ball who would probably spend the whole movie time eating their snacks.

That was also the reason why he didn't notice it when Kamui already stopped watching the movie in the middle of it and just focused his attention on something else. He didn't notice anything until much, much later when he finally noticed that Mokona had already eaten all the snacks and was now sleeping soundly on the teen's lap.

"Kamui?" He called when he saw the younger male looking somewhere else. He followed the teen's line of vision and saw, to his annoyance and irritation, the couple beside them kissing as if they were in their bedroom. Or rather, he thought that maybe the two had started like that earlier, since they were far over from kissing by now and had already moved on to the next base. The guy was sitting on the chair with two legs apart while the girl was sitting on his lap with her back on him and facing the screen. It was nothing at first glance, especially since the light was so dim one could barely see anything except the huge white screen. But for those who sat close to the two, they could easily see that the guy had his one hand inside the girl's unbuttoned blouse and his other hand under her loose skirt.

The onmyouji couldn't help but remember something else when he saw that scene. _That dream which he had as Mad Hatter…_ What more was the fact that the guy's jeans was unbuttoned and was placed lower than how people normally wore their pants. _Not to mention they were subtly rocking against each other. _

"Kamui." Subaru called again, a little louder this time. The teen looked at him so abruptly he could almost laugh, if it weren't for the slight tinge of red on the other's cheeks. "Don't look at them." He said the last statement in a quieter voice. Kamui only nodded, still blushing slightly, and Subaru couldn't help but heave a deep sigh. Now he lost all his concentration on the movie. _And he even did his best to watch it from the very start just so he could answer any of Kamui's would-be questions…_

"They're… doing it so publicly…" Kamui voiced his observation, making Subaru sigh again. They both looked at Mokona when the latter shifted in position, almost making him fall if it weren't for Kamui's immediate reflex to grab him.

"Is it finished yet..?" The fur ball said in a blurry voice, still thick with drowsiness. He was awakened by the teen's action and slowly shifted in position once again.

"It's finished now." Subaru said as they saw the credits at the end of the movie. "Shall we go?"

Kamui stood up, hugging Mokona once again, when he saw Subaru strode behind their seat and onto the couple who had just finished their lovemaking inside the movie theater. The teen's eyes widened when Subaru suddenly stepped on something behind the lovers' seat and the chair they were seating on suddenly slumped back to the way it was before people sit on it. The guy blurted out a curse when he was squeezed in it and the girl yelped when she fell from his lap and onto the floor.

"Kamui, let's go." Subaru voiced as if he didn't just do something bad.

Mokona only laughed out loud when they finally got away from the place. "The guy swore that he'd cut the one who did that into tiny bits and pieces, you know." Subaru only looked at him. They both knew that the onmyouji could do more than just turn the guy into minced meat if he really wanted it.

They were walking down the road when Kamui saw a stall selling hotdogs in buns and hamburgers. The teen didn't even need to say anything since Subaru was also hungry he immediately walked towards it. They all bought hotdogs in buns and started to trace their way back to the Kinomoto house. The sun was about to set and Sakura said that they would all go to the Mitsumine Shrine Festival later tonight.

The three walked for some minutes in quietness and contentment as they all ate their foods when they turned into a part of the road where there was a shallow abyss on the other side. They stopped for a while, gazing at the houses below. If they looked farther, they could see the mountain ranges and sun setting.

"Woah…" Mokona voiced. They all looked at the serenity of the scene and also the bright orange tinge of the sun's rays in they sky.

"It's beautiful…" Kamui pointed. Subaru nodded as he brushed some of Kamui's fringe out of his face and behind his ears. The teen's cheeks blushed a little, though it was barely visible because of the sun's orange rays.

Subaru noticed it nevertheless, making him smile once again. "It is." Kamui smiled and nodded though the onmyouji was already talking about something else entirely.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Subaru couldn't help but stare at Kamui. The teen's dark blue striped yukata fitted him very well. It was nice together with the geta that they borrowed from Touya. _Kamui was more handsome wearing it… _The onmyouji wore a black yukata with cherry blossom design, also from Touya. He was walking side by side with Kamui, but the only view he could see was the younger male happily walking together with him.

Shiro, who was walking on Kamui's other side, kept on sighing at the scene just beside him. Both Kamui and Subaru looked utterly contented as they walked. It seemed the two could just have a night walk and still be able enjoy it. _Well, they surely weren't able to have some alone time with one another earlier because of one certain fur ball…_

All of them were currently walking towards the Mitsumine Shrine, where the Festival was being held, wearing yukata of different styles and colors. Mokona was on Nokoru's shoulder now, yapping continuously with the other male about their tour earlier. The blonde was wearing an orange yukata, complimenting his hair nicely. Fuuma was walking beside the blonde, once again with a scowl on his face, indicating his annoyance towards the continuously talking fur ball. He was wearing a black yukata with the same striped pattern as Nokoru's. They were both walking in front of Kamui and Subaru.

In front of the blonde and the raven were Touya and Sakura walking side by side as well together with two other guys. On Touya's other side was a silver-haired male with slender body and kind face. They knew that guy from another dimension as Yukito and they weren't surprised anymore when they learned that he was actually the Touya of this dimension's lover. On Sakura's other side was a brunette male named Shaoran, though it seemed he wasn't welcomed by Sakura's older brother, if the glares and growls coming from Touya every time the brunette talked to Sakura was any indication.

They arrived at the shrine after several minutes of walking and the scene that greeted them all was very warm and welcoming. Even Subaru couldn't help but stare at the lively decorations and crowded stalls with wonder. _It's a very nice change of pace…_

They all decided to meet in front of the shrine itself on midnight before they went on their separate ways. Sakura and Shaoran left together, much to Touya's annoyance, while he and Yukito also decided to have a little date of their own. Fuuma begrudgingly left together with Mokona and Nokoru while Shiro, Kamui, and Subaru decided to stay together and stroll around the place.

"What is that?" Kamui pointed to a stall where about three men gathered while firing at some figurines on display in the shelf.

"That's a kind of game." Subaru answered as they decided to approach the stall. "You use guns to fire at the small figurines. If you managed to shoot them, you earn a prize." Kamui nodded in excitement at the prospect of playing it. The men looked at the two ravens with mocking gaze as they thought of how the two would be able to shoot anything with their frail built.

The moment Subaru and Kamui took the guns and shoot was the moment all the small figurines broke one by one. The three men decided they were better off not messing with either of the males as they watched with wide eyes the remarkable scene before them. Even the vendor could only gulp and gape as the amount of prize he has to pay increased by the second. Shiro only yawned as he watched the two, as if that was just normal for anybody to do.

When they finished firing, Kamui chuckled when he realized he had not missed a shot. Subaru looked proud of both of their accomplishment as well. In the end, the vendor decided to just give the two his most precious prize – a gold necklace with a symbol of rose as pendant. Subaru put it on Kamui's neck before patting the younger male's head.

"It suits you." He smiled when Kamui blushed a bit from his comment.

"Thank you, Subaru." Kamui chuckled before hugging the older male tightly, causing Subaru's eyes to widen a fraction. He hugged the boy back before giving Kamui's hair a small kiss.

The two decided to just eat cotton candies while walking, playing games of different sorts in different stalls, eating ice creams, buying some balloons for Kamui, and most of all, enjoying themselves to the fullest.

By midnight, they went to the place they promised to meet their companions while eating popcorns, feeling contented with one another. Shiro also ate some of the snacks they bought but the kodan didn't want to eat as much as he wanted to sleep. When Fuuma and Nokoru arrived, Mokona immediately jumped on Kamui's chest and took the popcorn from the raven. Kamui only chuckled as hugged Mokona.

"Ooh, someone looks so happy tonight." Nokoru teased as he looked at Kamui's smiling face. He then looked at Subaru as the latter stood leaning on a wall. "And it seems that statement doesn't only apply to Kamui too."

"Hi, everyone!" Sakura voiced as she waved her hand at them. She was still a little far, walking together with Shaoran who was holding a lot of things. Touya and Yukito were walking some distance before them.

Everyone chatted animatedly, except of course those who were meek or silent by nature, as they decided to eat some hotdog-in-buns. They decided to watch the fireworks together with other people beside the cliff on the other side of the shrine. From their spot, the whole city could be seen – the lights from buildings and houses looked like tiny stars due to their high location.

Far from them was a huge tower that stood so proudly even in the darkness. Kamui stared at the tower for a while, trying to remember where he had seen it before.

"Do you know..? I often dream of that tower over there." Sakura voiced beside the young male, pointing at the huge structure. "It looks so daunting in my dreams somehow."

Kamui's eyes widened as he nodded to her. "Yes, it is. I dreamed of that tower once too." He looked at Subaru and was about to tell the older male about that when all of their attention was caught by a large explosion of sparkling colors in the sky.

"Woah…" Kamui and Mokona voiced in unison, especially when the fireworks display started. They stared at the sky in wonder and amazement, watching millions of sparkling lights glow and create beautiful explosions before diminishing into nothingness.

"Those are fireworks." Nokoru voiced on his other side. The young raven nodded absentmindedly.

Kamui somehow felt that the fireworks were pitiful things. _They were created for the sake of disappearing into the darkness after their beautiful mere seconds role was done._

_Would he also be like that..? Would he be nothing but a sparkle about to disappear into the darkness too..?_

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Kamui: Everything was already so perfect. Why did you have to ruin it by making that line at the very end?

Ren-sama: Don't blame me. You're the one who said that cryptic line.

Kamui: Hn. Anyway, nothing can dampen my mood. That date was the best date I've ever had. (*grins smugly*)

Ren-sama: That date was the _only_ date you've ever had.

Kamui: (*growls*) When my power and memory comes back, I'll make sure to make you pay, Ren.

Ren-sama: Wow, Kamui, that was the most amazing date I've ever seen!

Kamui: (*grins smugly again*) Yeah, I know!

Ren-sama: (*sighs in relief*)

Host: Please review, everyone. ˆoˆ


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

Kamui kept playing with his necklace as they all waited for Sakura's father to come out of his room. It was now two weeks after the festival and they've already been familiar enough to the place to actually spend some time strolling here and there for the last few days. Kamui and Subaru have had more of their date-like city explorations – sometimes alone, sometimes with someone, and many times together with everyone. One could also say they've all gotten really closer to one another these past two weeks too.

Subaru could see it though, even if Kamui tried to hide it with his smiles. _Kamui was worried, almost afraid, about something…_

"Sorry to have kept you waiting!" Sakura's father came out of his room with his usual kind smile before he handed Kamui the feather. "I believe this is yours."

Kamui smiled at him, before hesitantly taking the feather. He knew he needed to get all of them. _But getting them meant that he's also getting closer to telling the other Kamui about his decision… _The feather slowly brightened the moment his hand touched it before it entered his chest. They all watched in amazement as his wings, almost as large as Mokona's now, appeared and enveloped his entire body before it dissolved into thin air.

Kamui's eyes widened when instead of his companions, he saw a mirror image of him in a room, crying in sorrow and grief. He was currently standing on a branch of a tree, standing while watching another Kamui lay on a small bed, sobbing quietly in the middle of the night. "Who..?"

"That's you, Kamui." Kamui's breath hitched when he felt two arms circled his waist. _The dark Kamui… _"Right now, you are seeing everything from Subaru's point of view while the real you are crying over there."

"W-What do you mean..?" Kamui's eyebrows furrowed as he felt his chest tightened at the scene. "Is… this a memory..?"

"Yes," the dark Kamui nodded before standing beside the real Kamui. "But this isn't your memory. It's that man's." He laughed hollowly before he looked at the real Kamui with a bitter smirk. "You can see now how he merely watches as you cry yourself to sleep every night. He never did anything for you, Kamui. He'll never do anything for you."

"M-Make it stop… Please…" Kamui couldn't help but feel miserable just watching the Kamui in the room cry so much. It's shattering his heart just looking at his mirror image. _If it was really Subaru's memory… then the man had been watching him suffer all this time… without doing anything..? _

"Yes, that's right." Dark Kamui smirked evilly as he read the thought in his real self's mind. "You can be sure that this isn't the only memory he's been keeping from you, Kamui. There are tons and tons of other memories too. That man is a very selfish person, Kamui. He only lives for himself. He'll never live for you. He'll never love you–"

"Stop it!" Kamui clutched his head as he jolted out of bed, screaming as memories of his pain and suffering poured into his head. "Stop..! Please… No more…" He sobbed as he cried in so much pain.

"Kamui!" Subaru was immediately by his side at that moment. They all panicked earlier when Kamui lost consciousness the moment he received the feather, at the same time feeling the dark Kamui in the room. "What's wrong?" Kamui, however, only shook his head while he sobbed, hugging himself tightly. "Kamui..?" Subaru had seen that cry before. And he hated it to the core.

The older male immediately sat on the teen's bedside and hugged Kamui. "It's okay… You must have had a nightmare. It's okay…" He kissed the teen's forehead as he gently rubbed circles on Kamui's back.

"Subaru… Subaru…" Kamui called in between broken sobs. Subaru couldn't help but feel like his heart was getting torn when the teen looked at him with those anguished eyes. "Subaru… why did you… abandon me..?"

The onmyouji felt his whole body turned cold the moment he heard the question. His breathing hitched and his eyes widened as he stared at Kamui. "W-What..?" Fuuma and Nokoru looked at one another before they silently agreed to leave the room for a while. They took Mokona with them while Shiro followed silently.

"I…" Kamui looked at Subaru with pleading eyes. "I cried and cried… I cried a lot, Subaru… but you still never came…"

Subaru closed his eyes as he gritted his teeth. He knew very well what Kamui was talking about. "Kamui, please allow me to explain–" He froze when Kamui suddenly hugged him tight. He could only hug the teen back in regret and guilt as he blamed his weakness for everything. "Kamui… I'm sorry. I'll never leave you again, no matter what. I promise you."

"You promise..?" On Kamui's face was pain, a lot of it… and resignation. Subaru couldn't help but feel rage towards the Subaru of before. _If only he was man enough to face Kamui before… If only he realized how important Kamui was to him before… If only he realized how much he loves Kamui…_

"I promise… I'll never leave you again. Not anymore." Subaru whispered softly beside the teen's ear as he kissed Kamui's earlobe. "You're very important to me, Kamui…" He smiled warmly as he wiped the tears off the teen's face. "Don't cry anymore…"

Kamui hiccupped before he nodded and smiled. _Too bad he might be the one to break the promise this time… _"Subaru, you're very important to me too…" _"That's why… that's why I won't let the dark Kamui harm you… that's why I'll bring back your lover for you… even if it means I won't be there to witness your happiness anymore…"_

Subaru wanted so much to wipe away the pained look on Kamui's face. But he didn't know how to do it. _If only he could do something… anything at all… _He kissed the teen's forehead before he looked at Kamui's face again, and seeing the blush on the teen's cheeks, he couldn't help but kiss his lips too. He felt Kamui gasped in surprise but he didn't take advantage of the teen at all. He continued nibbling on the teen's lower lip before kissing the younger male passionately.

They both turned in surprise to the doorway when someone suddenly cleared their throat in an attempt to distract the two ravens. Subaru growled venomously as he stared at a fur ball who dared interrupt his moment with Kamui. The fur ball immediately tried to hide again in hope that Subaru wouldn't see him anymore. Kamui only chuckled at the two of them.

After a while, the two finally left the room together with Mokona before saying their gratitude, and also goodbyes, to the Kinomoto family. Mokona's wings grew and a gust of wind circled the three of them before swallowing them all up. The next thing they knew, they were already in a place so different from the peaceful, not to mention ordinary, place they came from.

"T-This is…" Fuuma mumbled as they all stared dumbfounded at a hoard of parading demons. Many of the demons turned to their direction because of the blinding light. And that was their cue to run.

"W-What are they?!" Kamui tried to look back to the ferocious monster-looking creatures chasing after them. He didn't need to be held by Subaru in order to run now since he was running as fast, if not faster, than everyone. They were running in some sort of forest in the middle of the night but it didn't hinder their sight at all. The teen could still see clearly what the ones chasing after them looked like.

"They're demons." Subaru answered as he glared at the ones chasing after them, his crimson and emerald eyes glowing incredibly before sakura petals appeared from nowhere and whirled around the demons, killing them instantly.

"I'm really glad Subaru-san is on our side." Nokoru chuckled as he kept on running while hugging Mokona to his chest. The others couldn't help but agree.

"Oy, fur ball! Why did you bring us here?" Fuuma snarled, not even bothering to look at the other anymore. "I thought you're our guide so we wouldn't end up in some chaotic and dangerous world!?"

"Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona answered, not even making sense.

"Can you feel any feather here, Mokona?" Kamui asked. They all looked at the teen when the latter appeared so calm now. Kamui only smiled at them before he looked at Mokona again. Somehow, Subaru's warm presence just beside him allowed him to relax a lot.

Their eyes, however, widened when they finally noticed how the teen looked like. "W-What is it?" Kamui asked, a little self-conscious about the shocked stares.

"Kamui, you're..!" Subaru was about to say it when he stopped, eyes widening in realization as he looked at everyone else. The others mirrored his actions and many of them were more than dumbfounded. Fuuma immediately cursed loudly as he inspected his own appearance.

Kamui tilted his head to one side, his black cat ears perking up cutely. On his rear swished an equally black tail. "Subaru…" He stared with wide eyes at Subaru and he couldn't help but think that the older male had become even more handsome with his long pointed ears and black tail which was a little wider and longer than Kamui's petite ones. The black angel wings on his back looked really daunting but nevertheless a marvelous sight. Fuuma had fangs and small whiskers, annoying him to the fullest. On his head were dog ears and there was a swishing dog tail on his rear, almost making him faint. Nokoru had white angel wings but he had long claws for fingernails. He had white rabbit ears on his head and a white puffy tail. On Mokona's head sprouted two little devil horns. Even Shiro had bat wings on his back. Aside from that though, there wasn't much difference between his appearance earlier and now.

"What the hell is going on with us!?" Fuuma exclaimed angrily while trying to pull his whiskers out, in vain since it hurt.

"I believe we've sprouted some wings… and some cute ears." Nokoru mused aloud as he inspected his own appearance, actually looking proud at his coolness.

Kamui blushed a little while he gazed at Subaru's appearance while Subaru did his very best not to jump the cute little kitten in front of him. Just the sight of Kamui looking at him with those huge amethyst eyes, not to mention having cute cat ears, could almost make him sport a gush of nose bleed. Nokoru, on the other hand, immediately glomped the teen while exclaiming how cute Kamui was.

"Don't you dare touch him!" Subaru snarled possessively while he tried to pry Nokoru away from his Kamui. The latter could only pout while being manhandled by the onmyouji in the air because he didn't have his own angel, nor even bat, wings.

"Okay, so we automatically became like these when we came here, right?" Shiro was the one who mused. "Maybe this bizarre appearance will also disappear after we leave this place."

"I hope you're right." Fuuma grumbled under his breath, obviously too annoyed to be lively.

"Do you think it's because of a feather?" Nokoru asked, effectively earning everyone's attention to himself. "Well, Kamui-san's feathers can even change a simple grassland into a choco land, right? Maybe it's the same ting..?" He asked the last part unsurely.

"I can't feel anything as of now." Mokona's invisible eyebrows furrowed as he tried to feel the feathers more, but there was still none.

"There's a village up ahead." Subaru's quiet voice interrupted them all. "Let's see if we can ask them about this place… and maybe also stay there for the night." Kamui readily nodded to him while the others looked at him with doubt. If ever there would be a community in the middle of this forest, then it would most likely be the community of those demons earlier.

It's not as if they were worried they would get eaten by the demons, especially since Subaru could just use his power to kill them all. Not to mention Nokoru and Fuuma weren't as useless to these situations as they seemed to be. They just didn't want unnecessary trouble to themselves. It's just that the feeling of being surrounded by non-human, not to mention grotesque, entities were a little more than perturbing. But alas, Kamui's cute smile while he rubbed his cheek on Subaru's coat and the latter's contented appearance was enough to make them just agree to the onmyouji, no matter how irrational that may sound.

And thus, they all flew to the village. Fuuma chose to just jump from tree to tree since he didn't have any wings while Nokoru carried Mokona as he flew. Kamui was carried by Subaru. Shiro had his own wings so he didn't need to be carried by anyone. It didn't take them much to arrive at the outskirt of the village, though they didn't immediately enter. They wanted to make sure that the village was indeed inhabited by humans instead of demons, especially since they could feel a very strong barrier circling the place.

The village was quiet and lit, meaning there were occupants in every house. Not to mention they could feel wary and fearful presences. The houses were small and old, made from woods and coconut leaves intricately woven. That somehow meant that the villagers knew the art of weaving, may they be demons or not.

As quietly as they could, they entered the village in high guard and alertness. Subaru used his Sakurazukamori abilities to feel every movement inside the house while the others observed their surroundings to the best of their abilities. Kamui walked beside the onmyouji and Shiro, eyebrows furrowed.

"Subaru, I think they're afraid to come out because we're here." He voiced so suddenly, making his companions look at him with arched eyebrows. His tail swished back and forth in nervousness at their gaze as his ears perked up at every sound inside the houses. But nevertheless, he didn't retract his words.

"Kamui is saying the truth. I can feel their wariness and fear even from here." Shiro was the one who voiced, though Subaru also agreed.

"I think your perceptive ability is beginning to come back." Subaru praised as he patted the teen's head, earning him another swish of tail from Kamui and also a little ear perking. It obviously meant that the teen liked his compliment. Kamui also blushed cutely before he grinned at the taller man. Subaru had to withdraw his hand lest he wanted to lose control over his rationality.

"That means they're humans, right?" Mokona asked unsurely.

"Their scent is human-like…" Nokoru's voice made them all turn to him. Who would have thought he'd have that kind of ability. One would think that it's Shiro or Mokona's specialty.

The sudden change in movement caught their attention and they all looked ahead of them as the occupants of the house started coming out one by one, in their hands were weapons meant not to hurt but to kill.

"Who are you and what are you doing in our village?" A bulky middle-aged man asked with rasp voice and hostility. All the villagers readied their weapons in case the answer wasn't something they wanted to hear.

"We're travelers." Nokoru smiled as he introduced themselves. His long bunny ears immediately caught the people's attention. "We came to this place by accident and we need a place to stay in."

The guy furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at him in barely concealed doubt. "I don't believe you." Fuuma was about to blurt something when the man continued. "Our village is the only village left in this place. There is no other human here than us. And I believe you're not humans or travelers." Fuuma was about to retort but he remembered that they didn't exactly look human at the moment.

"What do you mean you're the only humans left?" Shiro furrowed his eyebrows in doubt. But then he realized that the dimension where he came from didn't even have humans to begin with. Not to mention, as Fuuma also thought, none of them looked exactly human right now. He couldn't help but sigh as he looked at his companions' weird looks.

"We just need some place to stay for the night. We promise not to make any unnecessary trouble for any of you." Nokoru resumed his speech with a kind and angelic smile, obviously making the other townsfolk swoon.

"Captain, the mere fact that they managed to enter the anti-demon barrier is enough of a proof, right?" One of the men asked, earning him a glare from the said Captain.

Kamui approached the Captain, much to Subaru's surprise and talked with him himself. He explained in a believable way why they managed to be in the place and immediately earned them the place to stay. The teen's companions didn't know if Kamui has the ability to persuade people or if it's actually the power of those cute little ears that the captain kept on staring at the whole time.

"So… how are we supposed to know if there's a feather here in the place?" Fuuma asked his companions while they sat in a circle inside their little hut. In their midst was a fire and a pot where their dinner was. It felt to Subaru like they were camping.

The Captain entered their hut while they were eating and told them the stories of the demons. He started from their history up to the different heroes and things. And then he told them of the many things that the dimension has. "It wasn't always like this. There were as many demons as there were humans back then. But seeing that humans are demons' food, our population dwindled… until this village is the only one left. Many sorcerers built the barrier surrounding us so the demons can't enter. And we've lived here in isolation since then." By the end of his very long explanation, Kamui and Mokona were already asleep and the fire was almost flickering. He ended his statement with an apology for his earlier treatment of the travelers before he bid them a good night sleep.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

Kamui nuzzled on the tight warmth that enveloped his body. In his sleep, he knew he could smell the faint scent of cigarette together with the unmistakable sweet scent of the one person he knew. It was enough to lull him into sleep, and yet it's also enough to make him a little self conscious, thus, waking him up to the sound of the early morning. He groaned as he opened his eyes, squinting to try and see what or who it was that he kept on nuzzling to. His eyes immediately widened before a different kind of heat enveloped him as he stared at a face mere inches from him. Subaru's eyes were closed and he was snoring quietly, indicating he was still asleep. But Kamui couldn't help but blush deeply at the thought that the whole night he must've kept on nuzzling onto Subaru.

"Someone's so in love so early in the morning." A voice not too far from him made Kamui return to the present as he tried his best to hide his embarrassment. But the mere presence of his swishing tail and his ears perking up and down repeatedly, not to mention the blush on his cheeks, immediately gave him away.

Fuuma couldn't help but grin teasingly at the teen's reaction to his words while Nokoru laughed heartily. Mokona giggled at the sight while Shiro only smiled. He wasn't too fond of bullying Kamui so early in the morning but not even he could resist teasing him a bit.

"What will Subaru-san do if he found out you were nuzzling to him like a cat the whole night." Nokoru voiced with a grin.

"_Well, most likely, he would jump you…" _They all thought as they stared at the now pouting teen.

"But it was a nice change of atmosphere, you know." Nokoru added as he looked at Subaru before he looked at Kamui again. "Subaru was never like that with us until recently. I think he's changing for the better because of your influence, Kamui-san."

"…But Kamui couldn't be good influence, Nokoru. It was more like the other way around." Mokona mused. "Because he's the most arrogant and self-centered brat back then… while Subaru **was** a really good-hearted person." They all gaped at his obvious insult to both ravens except Kamui who treated the statement as something precious. _So he was like that back then… and Subaru wasn't this lonely and solitary._

"Did I act like that… to Subaru too?" He asked with deep curiosity, eyes widening a little when Mokona immediately nodded.

"You didn't like everyone. Not the seals, not the angels… because you liked to be on your own." Mokona stated proudly. He learned everything from Yuuko. But mainly, there were things that he knew from the start, especially since it was one of his 109 abilities. "But Subaru was one of the people who influenced you. He even taught you many things, like studying… fighting, and even socializing though he's not too good at it too."

Kamui gripped his shirt tightly as he tried to imagine those things. Even though he still couldn't remember many things, the mere fact that Subaru was not as cold he thought the man once was, it was all worth thinking about. He could feel his heart swell up at the information and was about to look at Subaru when he felt the onmyouji shift in his position and sat up, morning death glare directed to none other than Mokona.

.

.tbc.

.

**Ren-sama's Corner:**

Host: Yup, that's it for now. I hope you enjoyed that one.

Ren-sama: Oh, by the way, who among you have read the ending of XXXHolic manga? I only watched the Season 1 and 2 of the anime so I was kind of shocked when I read the entire manga. I didn't expect it to end like that! (*suddenly wails in anguish*)

Kamui: (*comforts the author*) It's okay, it's okay. There's no need to wail for that. I just hope your readers won't wail in the end too… (*He smiled darkly, as if daring the author to do exactly the same thing and the author should know what will happen*)

Ren-sama: (*hiccups*) Alright, I'll think about it. But don't you dare threaten me if you want me to be an angel to both of you.

Subaru: It's okay. We won't kill you before the end of this fict. Rest assured.

Ren-sama: I don't mean that kind of angel! Anyway, everyone, what do you think of tis chapter? Please review!


	24. Chapter 24

**Ren-sama's Note:**

**It's been a while, everyone! Thanks for your reviews! Here's the next chapter and I hope you enjoy it! ˆoˆ**

**.**

**Chapter 24**

"How dare you talk about–" Subaru was about to say something awful when he noticed Nokoru discreetly pointing towards Kamui behind the teen. He didn't know what exactly Fuuma was sighing but the onmyouji only had to look at Kamui's face to know what they meant. The teen, it seemed, liked what Mokona told him and the thought of Subaru rejecting that past made Kamui very, very upset. "Kamui–"

"I know." Kamui interrupted him, making all of them furrow their eyebrows. It wasn't like the teen to interrupt Subaru of all people while the latter was still speaking. "I know you don't want to be reminded of the past anymore… I know you also don't want me to remember anything…" He smiled as he looked at the other male's wide, obviously surprised eyes. "Don't worry… the past might serve as a painful reminder for the both of us… but I'm not too bothered with it anymore." He cupped the onmyouji's cheeks with his two hands, not even realizing that their companions already went out of the hut to give them some privacy. "…because, Subaru, I've already decided."

To say that Subaru was surprised at Kamui's actions was an understatement. He couldn't fathom it at all. "Kamui… what do you mean by that?" Instead of answering, however, Kamui only moved forward and hugged him tightly and buried his face on Subaru's chest. "Kamui..?"

"All this time…" Kamui's muffled voice echoed in the hut. "All this time… I wasn't as innocent as you think. I noticed right away that you don't want me to remember anything… I also know that you're trying your best to atone… for abandoning me. I know that you're suffering and hurting because of me. And that you're doing your best to protect me... while all I ever did was give you pain…"

"Kamui, stop making it sound like that." Subaru reprimanded gently. "I have my choices before me. I just chose to do this. Also, you don't have to worry about the fact that I'm hurting." The onmyouji returned the tight hug before he kissed the top of the teen's head. "It was different back then. But I'm glad I'm able to feel these things now."

Kamui looked up in confusion at the last statement as he saw Subaru's gentle expression. He even blushed when he realized that the Sakurazukamori had his long tail wrapped around the teen's waist, securing him in place. "What do you mean..?"

Subaru sighed. He was still not too inclined to talk about his past. But if it would make Kamui feel better, then it's worth a try. "Kamui… when I became the Sakurazukamori, I thought that it's better to lose all emotions and all my attachments to people. The person most important to me died at my hands and all I could was crumble into pieces as I tried to find why I was alive when he's dead. I wanted to die so badly too… but I couldn't because I was the eternal and undying Sakurazukamori. I became like a living corpse, unable to do anything except drown in blood and darkness. It was so hard… not feeling pain or even despair because you know you don't have hope in anything anymore." Subaru's eyes turned almost lifeless at that single moment and Kamui immediately hugged the older male tighter. The onmyouji felt the teen's warmth seeped in him and it was enough to drive his bad memories away. "So, Kamui… it's alright to feel pain. Because feeling it means that there's still hope somewhere inside your heart. It means that you're still alive and capable of having emotions."

Kamui's eyes widened at the onmyouji's last statement. It was good and well to know that Subaru was tolerant of pain. But his decision would never change. What he wanted Subaru to feel wasn't pain or despair, but happiness and contentment. And he knew that giving back the person Saubru loved and longed for would grant that happiness.

"Kamui…" Subaru's quiet voice distracted the teen from his thoughts and he looked at those mismatched eyes filled with silent concern and pain. "I want to know what the Core told you. Or at least what has been happening since then. I want to know…"

"…_Because I can't help but feel that you're… distancing yourself from me. I feel… that you're about to leave me behind… I'll die if that ever happened… Don't… ever leave me…"_

Kamui, not having the ability to read minds, wasn't able to hear the thought that ended the older male's statement. But that didn't mean he didn't sense the deep worry and concern the other male has for him. He wanted to tell him, really, but Subaru would only be against it. The older male would surely want to confront the Core directly. And Kamui didn't want Subaru to be hurt because of him. _He wouldn't be able to live knowing Subaru's life would be in jeopardy because of him… _"He just… scared me a bit…" He answered with a strained smile.

"What do you mean? Did he say awful things to you? Did he hurt you?" Subaru's worry only rose up at that. Kamui was precious to him. _He loves Kamui. _He'd never live it down if he learned that he was oblivious while Kamui was being hurt.

"No… he just…" Kamui started as he shook his head. "He just… scared me… That's all. There's no need to worry about it, Subaru. I'm fine now."

Subaru wasn't persuaded but he didn't show it. Instead, he smiled at his cute kitty and slowly leaned down for a kiss. Kamui automatically blushed as he closed his eyes before he felt the warm and soft lips that covered his own in a sweet, chastised kiss. It was fleeting, only lasting for some mere seconds, but it was intimate and affectionate Kamui couldn't help but blush more.

"Sorry, I got carried away." Subaru mumbled as he cleared his throat, obviously trying his best to hide his embarrassment, not to mention the unmistakable tinge of red on his cheeks. Kamiu chuckled as he hugged Subaru again.

"Ahem." Nokoru's amused 'cough' broke the two out of their intimate hug and both stared at the blonde with different expressions, one with embarrassment and one with a glare. Nokoru was on the doorway and behind him were the others. "I think that's enough sappy moment for now." He grinned knowingly even though all he saw was the two of them hugging one another.

"We should circle and check the area a bit to know if there's a feather here." Fuuma said as he also smirked knowingly. "Though if you two want to stay in bed cuddling the whole day, we also don't mind…" He earned an audible growl from Subaru while Kamui only blushed deeper at his words. Shiro only sighed at the scene while Mokona didn't even react like anything was out of the ordinary.

"Let's go." Subaru simply said before they were all out of the hut and out of the village.

**. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .**

"I can't believe this…" Nokoru mused aloud as he, Mokona, and Shiro surveyed the forest from the air. Fuuma, Kamui, and Subaru were on foot just some ten meters below them. "I can't see anything except forest." He could the rising sun from the horizon and yet all he could see from all direction were trees of different sizes and shades of greens.

"Mokona wonders why there are no demons." Mokona thought aloud. They were already far from the village and far from the barrier and yet there was still no demon in sight.

"Maybe because it's daytime..?" Shiro asked more to himself than to answer his companion's question.

"What do you think?" Subaru asked Kamui as they walked in leisure. The two were walking side by side while Fuuma was a little farther ahead, kindly clearing the grasses for the two other ravens to walk on.

"No, I still can't feel anything." Kamui said as he tried to feel anything. "I feel that there really isn't any feather in this place."

"Are you sure?" Fuuma was the one who asked this time as he turned his head over his shoulder to have a look at the teen behind him. "We might not be able to come back here anymore and if there's actually a feather…"

Kamui only smiled. "I believe in my intuition." Both Subaru and Fuuma only sighed in defeat.

"But there's still no harm in trying to search the forest, right?" Fuuma voiced again.

"…except there's actually harm in disturbing the sleeping demons." Nokoru's voice from above made them look up just as the blonde flew down together with his two companions.

"We saw some demons not far away from here." Shiro was the one who explained. "They're heading this direction."

"They look big and scary." Mokona and Nokoru voiced in unison, though having different tones – the fur ball with worry and the blonde with amusement.

Fuuma smirked. "Time for some action…"

And not a second later, they all felt the disturbingly dark auras and presences of the demons even though the creatures themselves were still a little farther away. They all readied themselves in the quickest way possible while Mokona did his best to hide in Nokoru's shirt.

"Kamui, you should stay back with Mokona. Shiro will guard you." Subaru said as he looked at the boy beside him, only to be surprised when he saw the said teen half scowling and half pouting cutely at him.

"Subaru, I may not have my memories. But that doesn't mean I don't know how to use my power. Call it instinct." Kamui said indignantly. Subaru only had a second to be surprised when the demons already appeared before them, not even waiting for them and immediately launching an all-out attack.

There were hundreds and hundreds of them, most were the size of an average human but there were those with the size of small animals and those twice the size of a giraffe.

Nokoru immediately used his combat skills and fought the demons using his physique alone. Fuuma also did his very best and was able to win without much sweat even though he currently has no sword. Shiro used his original size and bit to pieces all the demons that dared bite him. Sometimes he would step on them or use his paws and slash them apart. Mokona remained hidden in Nokoru's shirt while Subaru used his swiftness and delivered fatal blows to all the demons unlucky enough to be in his way. He sometimes used his sakura petals to turn them into minced meant but that was only for those who were quick enough to escape his physical attacks.

It was an all-easy battle for them. And Kamui half pouted and half scowled again when he realized he didn't have to do anything at all. Or rather, he couldn't do anything at all because all the demons who were unfortunate enough to make him as a target would meet and immediate and swift death at the hands of the Sakurazukamori or at least the hands of his millions of sakura petals in the air.

The fight went on for several minutes not because they were having any difficulty but because there was just no end to the enemies. No matter how many demons they killed, there were still twice more coming at them to replace the killed ones. It was exhausting to say the least, especially since the demons were also swift even if they weren't very strong. After almost an hour, they managed to kill most of the demons but also with some minor injuries here and there.

Nokoru was about to deliver a fatal blow to one particular annoying demon when he suddenly felt himself thrown away at least ten meters away. He landed with a loud thud on a tree branch and he grunted in pain as his head spun.

"Oy, Nokoru, are you alright?" Fuuma asked from the other side but he too was thrown in the air so suddenly when he let his guard down.

That somehow caught Subaru and Kamui's attention and they all looked as Fuuma and Nokoru both tried to get up from the ground.

"It's those giants." Shiro saw the whole encounter and let the others know about it. "I saw them send some blade-like wind chi with their hands and throw both Nokoru and Fuuma in the air without physically touching them."

"Shit." Fuuma muttered as he tried his best to stay upright. The blow was enough to kill an ordinary human. And he was glad he wasn't ordinary. Nokoru was beside him doing exactly the same. They both looked up at the giants with quiet glares as they tried to gather their strength back despite the pain.

Subaru used his hands to control the sakura petals with better accuracy and attacked the giant demons without a second thought. To his and everyone's surprise, however, it's as if those demons' skin were made of metal and not even the deadly beauty of sakura petals were able to do them any harm.

"Tch." He maneuvered in the air as several wind blades tried to hit him in the same manner as they hit Fuuma and Nokoru earlier.

"Let me handle them." Kamui's voice rang in the midst of the commotion and all their attentions turned to him. Subaru wanted so much to argue and stop his lover (he thought so secretly) but refrained from doing so, seeing the serious pair of amethyst eyes looking at him silently asking for permission.

"Oy, oy. Can you even do something about them?" Fuuma looked annoyed and at the same time worried. They saw that not even Subaru could do any damage to the giants who kept on releasing wind blades on them and he wasn't entirely sure Kamui should even be a hundred meter near the creatures.

Kamui only nodded before he jumped from tree to tree in instinctual agility and swiftness before he stopped directly below the giants. He tried to look for anything akin to weakness but he had little success in finding any. _So it's hidden huh… _He smirked to himself, knowing it wouldn't make any difference anyway, before he blinked in confusion on why he suddenly thought that. _Was he always this arrogant before he lost his memories..? _No wonder Subaru didn't like him in the same way…

He sighed as he started concentrating his power in his whole body in the same way his intuition told him, allowing him to levitate in midair without any form of wings. His power alone sufficed in making the forest tremble beneath them. To say that his power didn't scare him at least a little would be a lie. He didn't think he has this much power in the first place since this was the first time he ever tried it.

Subaru and the others grabbed the nearest tree to them in order to not fall from the sudden shaking of the earth. The giants even stopped their attack and stared at Kamui who was already some meter above them. Some of the forest animals and birds immediately flew away in fright at the shaking of the ground. Even some demons flew or ran away to save their own skin. Even a simple demon would know it wasn't wise to be near Kamui when he's prepared for battle.

"So… this is the power to either destroy or save the world huh..?" Nokoru voiced as he tried his best to stay standing despite everything. "And he's not doing anything yet too."

"Kamui has no reservation right now. He doesn't fear hurting a friend so he can go all out." Subaru voiced as he too watched from below how Kamui continued to gather more and more of his power and waited in concern as the ground continued to tremble.

Kamui looked at the three giants with unconcerned eyes. He had no pity for creatures who dared lay their hands on his friends. Seeing that the demons were the first to attack them, he would waste no time in getting rid of them.

Kamui felt his whole body glow as he clapped his hands together once, creating a huge wave of pure and raw energy that circled him. He faced his hands on the three giants just as the energy hit the maximum. Even he was surprised when he saw his energy devoured the giants in one go, leaving nothing behind. Not even a trace of the giants' ashes could be found. It was a swift and quiet attack, and one very terrifying even for him.

Nokoru and the others could only stare in shock and utter disbelief at the unbelievable display of immense raw power. The ground seized from trembling and the whole forest turned quiet again. But the loud beating of their hearts continued to rattle in their ears as they stared at the teen from above with wide eyes.

"Kamui!" Subaru immediately flew when he saw the light surrounding Kamui diminishing and the boy was slowly falling. He grabbed Kamui by the waist and hugged him close before he flew down again. "Are you alright?"

Kamui only nodded before he looked up at Subaru's worried gaze. "I'm just a little tired. That's all." Subaru's worried expression eased a little and he gave the younger male a gentle smile.

"That was… superb." Nokoru voiced, tone highly deep in amazement and admiration. "No wonder you're called… The Kamui." Kamui only gave him an embarrassed chuckle at that.

"Yup, that's the power of the unrestrained Dragon of Heaven!" Mokona appeared from inside the collar of Nokoru's shirt and all the others glared at him for doing nothing but hide the whole time when he's obviously a lot stronger than he looked. The fur ball didn't seem too bothered at it. "And Kamui's power right now is still less than half because the Core has half of his power! Do you see now how powerful he is?" He added the last two statements with giddy excitement that the others thought he looked and sounded like a doting mother.

"Are you sure you're alright, Kamui?" Shiro walked towards them and asked. "That power earlier was enough to wipe out a village. The toll on the user will not likely be pretty."

"I'm fine." Kamui smiled kindly before he pouted. "And please don't say such things as wiping out a village. I will never use my power like that."

"Yes, I know. Sorry." Shiro smiled as well. "So… now that the commotion is over, any luck with the feather?"

"I'd say there's really no feather here." Kamui simply said before he shrugged.

"I second the motion." Mokona hopped on to Nokoru's shoulder. "Ah." His sudden surprised voice made them turn toward him and they all saw his eyes opened before the jewel on his forehead glowed.

"Don't tell me…" Fuuma muttered just before the glow casted a ray of light which in turn shaped itself into square. A screen appeared before them and the sight of a drunken Yuuko greeted their eye sights. "Well, well. Aren't you having a lot of fun while we're risking our lives here as always?" Fuuma said before he crossed his arms over his chest.

Yuuko only chuckled playfully before her amused eyes turned a little more serious. "Alright. Good evening, though I can see that it's morning in the place where you're in right now." They saw Watanuki in the background grilling some pork and fish and other stuffs before the screen went back to Yuuko's face. "I have another news."

"What now?" Subaru growled. He didn't want to know any more of those hope shattering news that the witch always tells them.

"Alright. I'll start with the fact that the Core is probably planning everyone's demise right now. I want to remind you all about the upcoming battle with the Clamp." She said casually. "Not too mention that the time you all have left is already too limited." Fuuma sneered at her but she didn't seem to notice it. Or if she ever did, she didn't let it deter her good mood.

"What else?" Kamui voiced. He knew that the witch wasn't the type to suddenly call them just to tell something they already knew, especially since she always starts with the happiest news before going on to the more worrisome ones.

With this, Yuuko's gaze turned a lot more serious than earlier and they all knew that she would be giving them an end-of-the-world news again. "I want to tell everyone that the Core is much, much nearer than you all think he is."

Subaru's eyebrows furrowed at that. It's the same words Shiro told him that night in the Kinomoto household. _So it's true then..? _Did that mean that the Core was always just… near them?

Even Kamui had to think about that. If the Core was always near… _then where was he hiding this whole time..? _Where was the Dark Kamui now? Was he actually listening to them right this instant?

"And…" Yuuko's expression didn't lighten up and they knew that the next news wouldn't be good either. "I want you all to know that one of you is hiding a really huge secret that can destroy your whole journey and bring destruction to you all."

Kamui felt his whole body froze at that. _Had Yuuko seen through him? _He didn't want to look at anyone right now, especially since his expression might give him away. Instead, his barely steady gaze looked at Yuuko and found her smiling at him. His amethyst eyes widened in fear and he couldn't help but step backward once. Yuuko must've noticed that and her smile turned a lot gentler.

"Alright. That's all." Yuuko drank her whole bottle of sake before the screen went blank. Mokona hopped on to Nokoru's shoulder again and noticed how stiff it was. He looked up and saw how the blonde was looking at everyone with curiosity. Subaru was also like that, looking at everybody else except Kamui coldly.

"What does the witch mean by that?" Shiro mused aloud. He knew that he had no huge secret to share so it could only be the others. He also knew that it wouldn't be Mokona since the fur ball was basically Yuuko's pawn. _ So who was it then..? _Was it Kamui or Subaru? He knew that those two were full of secrets, especially since they were the center of all this. But he couldn't be too sure about Fuuma and Nokoru either. He didn't know much about them as well.

"I don't think that it will help our journey if we keep on suspecting one another." Nokoru voiced coolly as he smiled gently at everyone. "Even if one of us has a secret they can't share at the moment, I'm pretty sure that they have their own valid reason for doing so."

"I hope that's really the case." Fuuma answered coldly. He didn't want to risk this journey because of some secrets. He wanted to go back to his dimension once again and he wouldn't be able to forgive anyone who was hiding a huge secret that may end up in him not being able to return.

"Shall we go to the next dimension now?" Kamui asked tentatively. The only answers he got were nods and grunts, and he felt like crying. He didn't want to create a rift in their comradeship just because of his secret. But he also didn't want to tell anyone. Nokoru was right. He really had a valid reason for doing so, no matter how only barely valid it was.

"Alright then!" Mokona was the only one with enough enthusiasm as his huge wings appeared and engulfed them all in a white light. The bright light blinded them for a while and they all closed their eyes as they traveled in the in-between dimensions.

The moment their eyes opened next was the moment all sounds and excitement stopped in the huge banquet hall.

"F-Fuuma..?" They all turned when they heard a familiar voice called. A stunned Kamui in a royal robe was looking at them with wide eyes as he held a wine glass in one of his hands. Subaru and Kamui looked at one another before they looked at the mirror-image of the teen.

"P-Prince?" Fuuma felt his whole body turned cold as he realized where exactly they had landed. _He never realized he would have to face his past so soon…_

.

.tbc.

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**Ren-sama's Note:**

**Okay, care to leave some review people? I know you all hate cliffhangers… and I kind of love them. (*peace sign*) Tell me your thoughts! ˆoˆ**


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